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He Really, Really Quiere Taco Bell OAKLAND, Calif. (AP) — A man accused of repeatedly robbing fast-food restaurants and markets became so familiar that employees at a Taco Bell would open the cash register when they saw him coming, police said. Eugene Rutledge, 31, of Oakland was charged Monday in connection…

This Guy Needs a Stunt Double, Pronto Even the most hysterical Keanu-phobes would agree that what happened to Kevin Nicolle is just a teensy — and we mean teensy — bit more horrifying than being forced to watch “Speed” again. Nicolle was driving along the highway in his BMW when the accelerator stuck…

A Man Fell into a Pit Once upon a time a man fell into a pit and couldn’t get himself out. A sensitive person came along and said, “I feel for you down there.” A practical person came along and said, “I knew you were going to fall in sooner or later.” A Pharisee said, “Only bad people fall into a pit.”…

Today's CleanLaugh - "Free Paper" My dry cleaner very generously gives each customer a free copy of the daily newspaper. As I took my copy, I told him, "I hope the business grows enough to offset the cost of the papers.""Oh, don't worry about us," he said. "Nothing dirties clothes more than newsprin…