Philemon 19-25 - The Motives of One who forgives
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Introduction:
As he closes his letter to Philemon, Paul gives insight into the motives for forgiveness. His words are meant to be the final push to move the heart of Philemon to forgive Onesimus. Each of his remarks contains a truth that should motivate us to forgive as well.
1. As we have already learned, forgiveness is a promise.
a) It is a statement of love that affirms "I hold no anger, I hold no hatred, I hold no bitterness against you.” And it has a three- fold perspective. I won't ever bring it up to you, I won't ever bring it up to anybody else, and I won't ever bring it up to myself. That's forgiveness.
b) No matter what you have done to me, no matter how you have offended me, I make a promise never to seek revenge.
2. Forgiveness is God-like.
a) Never are you more like God or Christ than when you forgive because that is what God does & that is what Christ does. Forgiveness is a magnificent virtue.
A. The Recognition of an Unpayable Debt (v.19).
1. ‘I, Paul am writing with my own hand…’ (v.1a).
a) Paul's custom was to dictate his letters to a secretary.
(1) But it was also Paul's custom at the end of many of his letters to pick up the quill and to sign his own name. For example, at the end of the letter to the Colossians which would have been delivered at the same time Philemon was being delivered:
You'll notice in chapter 4 verse 18 that epistle closes with this, "I, Paul, write this greeting with my own hand, remember my imprisonment, grace be with you."
(2) It was common for the Apostle Paul to pick up the pen and write something with his own hand.
2. ‘You owe me even your own self besides…’ (v.1b).
a) Owing a debt you cannot pay.
(1) In (v.18), Paul offered to make good Onesimus’s debt. Paul knew that restitution was an essential part of forgiveness, and that Onesimus did not have the means to repay Philemon.
(2) By offering in his own writing to repay Onesimus’s debt, Paul is in effect personally signing an I.O.U.
(3) Then Paul reminds Philemon, you owe me even your own self as well.
(4) This is Paul’s plan… to put Onesimus’s debt on his account and then cancel it because Philemon owes Paul an even greater debt.
(a) Onesimus owes Philemon a material debt; Philemon owes Paul a spiritual debt.
(b) Onesimus owes Philemon a temporal debt; Philemon owes Paul an eternal one.
(c) Paul had shared the gospel with him and led him to a saving knowledge of Jesus Christ. That is a debt Philemon could never repay.
b) This applies to us as well.
(1) When someone offends us and incurs a debt, we should remember that we owe debts to others. All of us have people in our lives who have benefited us spiritually in ways we could never repay. We are in debt to them.
(a) I am in debt to my Parents. I owe them a debt for supporting me, supplying my needs, and educating me. I am in debt to them for disciplining me and holding me spiritually accountable for my behavior while growing up.
(b) I am in debt to my Dad for leading me to Christ and teaching me to get up early in the morning to have devotions with the Lord.
(c) I am in debt to my wife for her friendship, love, support, wisdom and input into my life.
(d) Most of all I am in debt to Jesus Christ for paying my sin debt He did not owe. Because I have received so much, what right do I have to be unforgiving.
!! B. The Possibility of Being a Blessing (v.20).
1. ‘Let me benefit from you… refresh my heart in the Lord…’ (v.20).
a) Refreshing the hearts of others.
(1) Refresh means “to profit by or obtain profit from someone; to be useful.”
(2) Remember back in (v.11) Paul said Onesismus was “once was unprofitable to you, but now is profitable to you and to me.”
(3) See, Philemon was not getting back the same man he had lost. Onesimus who was unprofitable to Philemon (v.11) had been radically changed by the grace of God.
(4) We to can be profitable to the Lord and to others as well:
As Paul was writing to the young Pastor Timothy, he said "Therefore if anyone cleanses himself from the latter, he will be a vessel for honor, sanctified and useful for the Master, prepared for every good work.” (2 Timothy 2:21, NKJV)
And at the closing of Paul’s letter to Timothy, he speaks about the usefulness of Mark "Only Luke is with me. Get Mark and bring him with you, for he is useful to me for ministry." (2 Timothy 4:11, NKJV)
(5) Now remember Paul said back in (v.7) your love has brought me joy and comfort. In fact, Philemon, you bring me much joy. Why? Because in the middle of (v.7) he says through Philemon, the hearts of the saints had been refreshed.
(6) People struggling, suffering, and hurting emotionally, had been refreshed by Philemon.
It is also the word the Lord used in Matthew 11:28, “Come to Me, all who are weary and heavy-laden, and I will give you rest. “ Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. “For My yoke is easy and My burden is light.” (Matthew 11:28-30)
(7) So check this out! Philemon brought troubled people rest and renewal; he was a peacemaker.
(8) So now, he says refresh my heart… be a blessing to me! By forgiving Onesimus, Philemon would maintain the unity in the Colossian fellowship, and that would bring great joy to Paul. It would refresh his heart in Christ; he would be spiritually blessed.
C. The Necessity of Obedience (v.21).
1. ‘Having confidence in your obedience…’ (v.21).
a) Having confidence in someone.
(1) Confidence – “To confide in, to rely upon, meaning to trust or have confidence in.”
(2) Isn’t it good to have people that you can have confidence in? It’s also a blessing to be the person that others have confidence in.
(3) In many of Paul’s letters, he used this word confidence toward others (2Cor.2:3; 7:16; 8:22; Gal.5:10; 2Thess.3:4).
b) Willingness to obey God.
(1) Paul had confidence in Philemon’s obedience to Christ. He did not doubt Philemon’s willingness to obey him (v.8), but here reminds him of the necessity of obeying Christ.
(2) Paul had this confidence in the Philippians obedience (Phil.2:12-18).
(3) Obeyed translates a form from which the English word acoustics derives. The compound verb has the basic meaning of placing oneself under what has been heard, and therefore of submitting and obeying.
(4) Examples of those hearing the Word and obeying It:
(a) Lydia (Acts 16:14-15); Philippian Jailer (Acts 16:32-33)
(b) The Jews in Berea (Acts 17:11); The disciples (Matt.17:5)
(c) As well as sinners obeying the gospel (Rom.1:5; 6:17; 2 Thess.1:8; 1Pet.1:2)
!! D. The Acknowledgment of Accountability (v.22).