Everyday Faith

“Forgiveness breaks the chains of hatred”

Luke 17:3-4 “Take heed to yourselves: If thy brother trespass against thee, rebuke him; and if he repent, forgive him. And if he trespass against thee seven times in a day, and seven times in a day turn again to thee, saying, I repent; thou shalt forgive him.”

I. Intro

A horrible tragedy occurred in rural Pennsylvannia in October 2006 when a gunman walked into a one-room Amish schoolhouse and killed five schoolgirls. The Amish community, greiving their great loss, asked for prayer and privacy, following the shooting rampage that also wounded five other girls. In the aftermath of the tragic event, reporters have repeatedly been amazed that the Amish people have emphasized the need for forgiveness, not anger, toward the gunman. “We’re very concerned that no message of revenge gets out. We believe in forgiveness,” an Amish man was quoted as saying. It’s inconceivable that a community suffering such a tragic loss could make contact with the gunman’s family with the message of forgiveness. One Amish woman said, “We can tell people about Christ, and actually show you in our walk that we can forgive; not just say it, but in our walk of life.

Watching and reading about the Amish people, I thought of the saying, “Preach the Gospel, and if necessary, use words.” Extending forgiveness in this situation would be humanly impossible were it not for their faith in Christ that enables them to show His compassion. What is forgiveness? psychologist Archibald Hart says it this way- “Forgiveness is surrenduring my right to hurt you for hurting me.” C.S. Lewis says it like this- “Everyone says forgiveness is a lovely idea, until they have something to forgive.” Hopefully, you and I will never have to forgive someone for something so horrendous as murdering our children. But, are we willing to forgive the friend or family member who hurt us this week or even many years ago? Sometimes we find it hard to forgive ourselves.

Holocaust surviover Corrie Ten Boom has written, “Forgiveness is the key that unlocks the door of resentment and the handcuffs of hate. It is a power that breaks the chains of bitterness and the shackles of selfishness.” Ann Curry, a Today Show anchor, commented after covering the tragic event, “I realize I did not know what forgiveness was until now.” Would someone learn the meaning of forgiveness by looking at our lives?

II. Don’t be a stumbling block

1. In our text, Jesus says “Woe unto him through whom the offense come.” That word “offense” comes from the Greek word “skandalon” it is a trap or a snare – any impediment placed in the way causing someone to stumble and fall. Now this is a word for all those who like to see other folk fall. This word is for all of the offenders. All those who love to set traps. Those who like to trip folk up and see them fall down. Now Jesus tells them, that when someone offends you seven times in a day, and ask you to forgive them each time, you are to forgive them seven times in a day. In other words, He says whatever they have done to you, whenever they do it to you – Forgive them. Now I kind of had to struggle with that. I struggle because if you’re like me, I really don’t like doing that (can I be real with you?). I don’t like throwing it off because when people do stuff to you, and you throw it off, sometimes they take your kindness - for weakness. And I don’t want you to think I'm weak. I don’t want you to think that it's ok. So my defense mechanism is anger, and bitterness and resentment. And so the bible tells me when something is wrong, confront it. Look at the text again in Luke 17 - It’s right there in verse 3, He says when my brother or sister sins against me, rebuke them.” He says to face it, why - because you will not be able to release what you will not confront.

Even if you’ve never served in the military, you’ve probably heard of basic training. According to the U.S. Army recruiting Web site, “Basic Training lasts only nine weeks, but you’ll remember those nine weeks for the rest of your life. You’ll spend the best nine weeks of your life learning what it means to be a soldier in the U.S. Army. And when it’s over, you’ll discover some amazing things. Your mind will be sharper, your body will be lean and hard, and you’ll be more confident than you’ve ever been before.” Sounds like an army recruiter wrote that. A friend of mine who served in the army has some interesting stories about basic training. He once told me about a surprise inspection of their barracks. If they passed inspection, they would get a weekend pass, but if they didn’t, they would have to stay and clean the barracks all weekend. My friend and 37 others passed inspection–but two didn’t. Those who passed were ready to celebrate until they found out the two’s failures meant everyone failed and therefore everyone would be spending the weekend cleaning. You can imagine how everybody felt toward those two soldiers. Now the drill sergeant did not do this to be cruel but rather to teach them that they were a unit and not just individuals.

The same is true in the Christian life. It is impossible to be a lone ranger Christian. We are responsible for one another. God’s purpose for your life is that you become a fully devoted follower of Jesus Christ. In the previous chapters, He was speaking in the presence of his enemies, those religious leaders who wanted to accuse Him. In these verses He is speaking to His disciples. If you are a follower of Jesus, these words are for you. In these ten verses Jesus gives four important keys to becoming a stronger disciple.

It’s sad, but sometimes Christians can be extremely rude and cruel to other members of the Body. Someone once said Christianity is the only army that shoots its wounded. How do you react when another disciples sins against you?

The only way to maintain good relationships with other believers is to be willing to quickly forgive others when they hurt you. For some people that’s a hard thing to do.

Jesus said forgiveness should be practiced even if the person sins against you seven times. That number is not to be taken literally. In other words you can’t keep count of the times you forgive a person, and on sin eight say, “Forget it, I’ll never forgive you because you just passed the limit!” In Jewish writing, the number seven was a “perfect number” which meant it could even mean “unlimited.” We should be willing to forgive others an unlimited number of times.

You can see this clearly by what Jesus said to Peter. At that point Peter got up enough nerve to ask in Matthew 18:21-22 “Then came Peter to him, and said, Lord, how oft shall my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? till seven times? Jesus saith unto him, I say not unto thee, Until seven times: but, Until seventy times seven.”

Can you think of an example right now of when another Christian sinned against you by doing or saying something that deeply hurt you? If you can’t think of anyone right now that’s good, because it proves you have probably done a good job forgiving them! But others of you are thinking of people and occasions when you’ve been wounded. What do you do?

A Sunday School teacher was trying to teach her class about God’s forgiveness. She was talking to them about what it means to confess your sins so you can be forgiven. As she concluded, she asked them, “Now, boys and girls, what must you do before you can be forgiven?” The right answer was “Confess yours sins,” but nobody answered the question, “What must you do before you can be forgiven?” One little boy figured it out and said, “Well, before you can be forgiven, first you’ve gotta sin!”

There is a difference between being “sinned against” and just having your feelings hurt. We think of the word “rebuke” as a loud, powerful statement as in “I rebuke you in the name of Jesus!” That may be appropriate when you are talking to demons, but when you are dealing with people you must be gentle in your rebuke. If someone sins against you, you should go to them privately and loving point out the error. When you do that it’s like you put the ball in their court and they need to respond.

After you have lovingly confronted the offending person, they should be willing to repent. Repentance involves more than simply saying, “I’m sorry.” It involves a change of mind that produces a change of behavior. If you are the person who has sinned against another disciple, and they lovingly rebuke you, how would you respond? If you are carnal, you’ll say something like, “Who are you to tell me what I’ve done is wrong!!?” Or you’ll start looking for something in their life to point out as sin. However, if you are walking in the Spirit, you’ll say something like, “I’m so sorry. Will you please forgive me for what I did? I assure that it won’t happen again.” Once you have sinned against someone, you can’t “unspill the milk” but you can certainly offer to clean up the mess.

You should be willing to offer them full and complete forgiveness–and not just once, but many times. Through they years I’ve been disturbed to hear Christians say, “I’ll never forgive him/her for what he/she did to me.” That’s a dangerous thing to say because Jesus also said in Matthew 6:14-15 “For if ye forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you: But if ye forgive not men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses.”

Forgiveness is not a feeling or an emotion–it is a choice. It is your decision not to want to punish that person for what they’ve done to you. The Bible word for forgiveness is aphemi, meaning to “cancel the debt” or “set one forever free from the obligation.” Our forgiveness should be a reflection of the forgiveness God offers us. He places our sins behind our back and remembers them no longer. I’ve heard people say, “Well, I’ll forgive them, but I won’t forget it.” If you actively choose to continue to remember what that person has done to you, you haven’t truly forgiven them.

If someone hurts you, and repents and asks you to forgive them, you should choose to not think about it any more. If you keep bringing up what they have done over and over again, it’s a sign your forgiveness is not complete. But what if the person doesn’t repent? Go ahead and forgive them anyway; at least you have done your part in the procedure, and you are only accountable to God for your role.

When God forgives us, He doesn’t keep bringing up our sin–but the devil keeps trying to make us aware of our own sin and the sins others have committed against us. That’s why the Bible calls him the accuser of the brothers.

Johnny was trying out his new slingshot at his Grandparents’ farm one day. He aimed at one of their ducks and to his surprise and horror, the stone flew straight at the duck and it fell over like a…dead duck. He was mortified. He panicked and hid the dead duck in the woodpile. That’s when he noticed his older sister, Ann, witnessed the whole thing.

After lunch, Grandmother asked Ann to help with the dishes and she said, “Oh, I think Johnny wants to help with the dishes.” The she whispered to Johnny, “Remember the duck?” The next day, Grandpa offered to take Johnny into town and Ann said, “I think Johnny wants to stay here and do my chores and let me go into town, don’t you?” And her look said it all, “Remember the duck.” After several days, Johnny couldn’t stand it any longer. He went to his grandmother and confessed to the whole dirty deed. His grandmother hugged him and said, “I know Johnny, I saw the whole thing from my kitchen window, and because I love you, I forgave you then.” He said, “But why didn’t you tell me?” She said, “I was just waiting to see how long you’d let your sister make a fool of you!” That’s what God must surely say to us when we continue to worry about our forgiven sin. He says, “Because I love you, I have forgiven you, so don’t let the devil make a fool out of you!”