God's Kingdom is for the humble

GOD’S IDEA

What does the Bible teach about marriage?

• Marriage is a committed partnership between a man and a woman. God’s creative work was not complete until he made woman. He could have made her from the dust of the ground, as he had made man. God chose, however, to make her from the man’s flesh and bone. In so doing, he illustrated for us that in marriage, a man and a woman symbolically become one flesh. This is a mystical union of the couple’s hearts and lives. Throughout the Bible, God treats this special partnership seriously. If you are married or planning to be married, are you willing to keep the commitment that makes the two of you one? The goal in marriage should be more than friendship; it should be oneness.

• Marriage is a cooperative effort between equal partners. God forms and equips men and women for various tasks, but all these tasks lead to the same goal—honoring God. Man gives life to woman; woman gives life to the world. Each role carries exclusive privileges; there is no room for thinking that one sex is superior to the other.

• Marriage is a gift from God. God gave marriage as a gift to Adam and Eve. They were created perfect for each other. Marriage was not just for convenience, nor was it brought about by any culture.

• Marriage was designed by God. The marriage relationship that God designed has three basic aspects: (1) The man leaves his parents and, in a public act, promises himself to his wife; (2) the man and woman are joined together by taking responsibility for each other’s welfare and by loving the mate above all others; (3) the two become one flesh in the intimacy and commitment of sexual union that is reserved for marriage. Strong marriages include all three of these aspects.

Matthew 19:4–6 (Matthew): 19:4–6 “Haven’t you read,” he replied, “that at the beginning the Creator ‘made them male and female,’ and said, ‘For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh’? So they are no longer two, but one.” Jesus’ answer began with the words “haven’t you read,” implying that they had not truly read their own Scriptures with any understanding (compare to the words “go and learn” in 9:13). They had certainly read the words many times, but they were unable to understand what the words meant. The Pharisees had quoted Moses’ writings in Deuteronomy; Jesus also quoted from Moses’ writings (Genesis 1:27; 2:24), but he went back to Genesis, the beginning. Jesus was referring to Moses’ words in Genesis about the ideal state of creation and particularly of marriage. In this answer, Jesus was using a rabbinic technique of arguing from the “weightier” text; in other words, an argument from creation was “weightier” than one from the Law because it had been written prior to the Law.

Jesus focused on God’s ideal in creating male and female. The Hebrew words for “male” and “female” reveal that the two had been created complementary to each other. God’s plan was that in marriage the husband and wife become one flesh, an intimate closeness that cannot be separated. The wife is not property to be disposed of but a person created in God’s image.

“So they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate.” N Jesus drew a distinction: God’s creation of marriage and his absolute command that it be a permanent union versus the provisions written hundreds of years later that tolerated divorce because of people’s utter sinfulness (their “hard hearts,” 19:8). God permitted divorce as a result of sin, but his command was that husband and wife be no longer two, but one flesh, describing an indissoluble union.

The Pharisees regarded Deuteronomy 24:1 as a proof text for divorce. But Jesus focused on marriage rather than divorce. He pointed out that God intended marriage to be a covenant—a permanent promise of love and faithfulness. The Pharisees regarded divorce as a legal issue rather than a spiritual one—marriage and divorce were merely transactions similar to buying and selling land (with women being treated as property). But Jesus condemned this attitude, clarifying God’s original intention—that marriage bring unity that no one should separate.