When Life is not Going Your Way

Two psychologists, Dr. Robert A. Emmons of the University of California, Davis, and Dr. Michael E. McCullough of the University of Miami, have done much of the research on gratitude. In one study, they asked all participants to write a few sentences each week, focusing on particular topics.

One group wrote about things they were grateful for that had occurred during the week.

A second group wrote about daily irritations or things that had displeased them, and the third wrote about events that had affected them (with no emphasis on them being positive or negative).

After 10 weeks, those who wrote about gratitude were more optimistic and felt better about their lives. Surprisingly, they also exercised more and had fewer visits to physicians than those who focused on sources of aggravation.

It isn’t always possible to change your circumstances, but you can change where you focus your mind and heart. Making gratitude a daily practice can increase your happiness and even improve your health.

What is Gratitude?

Gratitude is being aware of and thankful for the good things you have. These good things are not necessarily material possessions. They can be relationships, situations, or anything positive in your life.

Gratitude is a feeling that might come to you spontaneously, but it's also a daily practice that you can cultivate. Choosing to count your blessings and taking the time to be grateful for good things in your life can have far-reaching positive effects.

The Benefits of Gratitude

Increased happiness.

Gratitude reduces a multitude of toxic emotions, from envy and resentment to frustration and regret. Robert Emmons, a leading gratitude researcher, has conducted multiple studies on the link between gratitude and well-being. His research confirms that gratitude effectively increases happiness and reduces depression.

Gratitude helps people feel happier and experience positive emotions. When you focus your mind on things that make you feel grateful, you will find that positivity follows.‌‌

‌Reduced depression.

Verbally expressing or silently reflecting on gratitude decreases depression. Practicing regular gratitude has also been shown to protect against developing depression in the future.

Strength when facing adversity.

Gratitude is good for your emotional health. It can help give you emotional strength and resilience when you're confronted with stress, loss, grief, or trauma. Gratitude lowers cortisol, a stress hormone, in your body. Lowered cortisol levels help you avoid many physical and mental side effects of stress.

A 2006 study published in Behavior Research and Therapy found that Vietnam War veterans with higher levels of gratitude experienced lower rates of post-traumatic stress disorder.

A 2003 study published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology found that gratitude was a major contributor to resilience following the terrorist attacks on September 11. Recognizing all that you have to be thankful for —even during the worst times—fosters resilience.

Improved physical health.

People who are grateful tend to sleep better and have fewer aches and pains. Increased feelings of gratitude might even indirectly improve immune function and reduce inflammation.

According to a 2011 study published in Applied Psychology: Health and Well-Being. Spend just 15 minutes jotting down a few grateful sentiments before bed, and you may sleep better and longer.

Community building.

People who are focused on gratitude are inspired to give back and support their community in positive ways. This means cultivating gratitude will not only benefit you — it'll also benefit those around you.

The call to the ministry is an invitation to unequalled privilege—none of us would argue that. It is an invitation to unsurpassed blessing, but that is not all. The call to the ministry is also an invitation to discouragement. What pastor, while understanding the privilege and the blessing of his calling, has not also has his heart broken? We all have. And there are those times when we are disheartened and downcast—maybe when we feel like giving up.

Paul knew deep, penetrating, disheartening disappointment over the Corinthian church. Their shallowness, their sin, their rebellion was a sad return for the great love he had felt for them, and the great sacrifice he had made in their behalf. And this Corinthian church had potential over any other European church.

The city had been restored by Julius Caesar after being in ruins for 100 years. It was a magnificent place. It was more open to the gospel than other cities, and the Apostle had great success in founding the church there, making the resident Jews extremely jealous.

In the nearly 20 months or so that he labored in that evil city, he built deep affection for the believers there. The church was flourishing, and apparently strong. But because he loved them so deeply, they had the capability to hurt him, and they did. Upon his leaving one sin after another, he took up residence in that communion of believers. The pressure of caring for that church was more difficult than all the other physical pain he had suffered through his multiple persecutions. The concern for the church hurt him more than anything that was done to him physically.

Anxiety over the Corinthians ate at his noble soul.They possessed all the gifts. They came behind in no gift, but they were divided, disorderly, worldly—and chaos reigned in their worship. Sin stained the Lord’s table. They fought each other, sued each other, sexually sinned with each other, and were proud all the while.

Conditions in the Corinthian church had become so bad that Apollos would not stay or return to Corinth, though Paul urged him to do that. Additionally, false teachers had come into the Corinthian church and managed to deceive members of the church to join an open mutiny against Paul.

Paul’s character was being blasted, his controversy with Peter (indicated in Galatians 2) was being exploited, his name was being slandered.

Doctrinal issues, the use of spiritual gifts were all mixed up with personality jealousies. They winked at incest, they abused their marriages, they ate at demon feasts, they failed to give as they should, they questioned the resurrection … what a church.

A congregation to bring grief to a pastor’s heart. And so much so that Paul was not sure he could even go back there—for two reasons.

One, he was afraid he wouldn’t be welcome; and secondly, if he wasn’t welcome, he was afraid he would say more that would exacerbate their animosity toward him.

On top of that, in Ephesus, where he was, a riot had started that could have taken his life. And some also tell us that he may well have picked up a serious, even potentially fatal illness, to which he refers in chapter 1 and chapter 6. He’s really at the lowest point of his ministry when he writes this letter. And it’s not hard to understand. He’s on the brink of death every day, he says. Every day he knows could be his last. A riot starts all around him, and the church which he loves is in utter chaos. And the main issue there is whether Paul is true or false. His own integrity is being questioned. And of course what compounded the anxiety that this produced was the deep, deep love that he had for that church.

He had already written them a letter out of much anguish of heart, much affliction with tears. He refers to it in 2:4. He then sent Titus, you remember, to Corinth. He sent him with that severe letter—that second letter that’s not included in the New Testament—and he was now waiting for Titus to come back, and he wanted to hear how they responded to the letter. Such is the scene before us. He can’t stay where he is, he can’t go where he wants to go. The people he loves so deeply have turned on him. Titus hasn’t come back with a report. He doesn’t know what the situation is. It’s in that scenario that we find him penning these words.

Look with me at verse 12.

2 Corinthians 2:12–13 KJV 1900

12 Furthermore, when I came to Troas to preach Christ’s gospel, and a door was opened unto me of the Lord, 13 I had no rest in my spirit, because I found not Titus my brother: but taking my leave of them, I went from thence into Macedonia.

2 Corinthians 2:14–17 KJV 1900

14 Now thanks be unto God, which always causeth us to triumph in Christ, and maketh manifest the savour of his knowledge by us in every place. 15 For we are unto God a sweet savour of Christ, in them that are saved, and in them that perish: 16 To the one we are the savour of death unto death; and to the other the savour of life unto life. And who is sufficient for these things? 17 For we are not as many, which corrupt the word of God: but as of sincerity, but as of God, in the sight of God speak we in Christ.

The first two verses establish for us the trouble in Paul’s soul.

Look back at verse 12. Troas—

2 Corinthians 2:12 KJV 1900

12 Furthermore, when I came to Troas to preach Christ’s gospel, and a door was opened unto me of the Lord,

“When I came to Troas,” he says. He has by now left where he was, he has come to Troas—a seaport city on the Aegean Sea in Western Asia Minor at the mouth of the Dardanelles, founded in about 300 B.C., ten miles from ancient Troy in Mysia. And Augustus had made it a Roman colony. His departure had been caused by the life-threatening riot in Ephesus. But he had already planned to go to Macedonia, and Troas was on the way, whether he went by land or by sea.

Paul, by the way, had been to Troas before, according to Acts 16. But apparently on his first visit, he did not found a church. A church is mentioned at Troas in Acts 20, so it is most likely that he founded a church on this brief visit.

And he says in verse 12, “When I came to Troas for the gospel of Christ.” He came to evangelize the city. He left Ephesus, moved to Troas for the purpose of evangelism. We don’t know how long he stayed, but it was a very brief visit. He had a tremendous spiritual opportunity there, as verse 12 indicates. “A door was opened for me in the Lord.” Not just favorable from a human standpoint, but God had opened this door. Now, he must have preached to know that. You can’t tell if the door is open until you knock. He must have begun preaching, and he preached with success and blessing. And that is why a church was born, even in this very brief and trying visit.It was the kind of situation that the servant of God longs for. It was the kind of marvelous situation that every preacher would love to step into. He came to preach Christ, and the door was wide open, and had been opened by the Lord. And in a very brief time, a church was born. Some men labor and labor and labor to plant a church—and it happened almost spontaneously. Apparently, he had complete freedom to preach the Word, and people responded with open hearts and eagerness.

But in spite of that, verse 13 says,

2 Corinthians 2:13 KJV 1900

13 I had no rest in my spirit, because I found not Titus my brother: but taking my leave of them, I went from thence into Macedonia.

“I had no rest for my spirit.” No rest. He was a troubled man. No rest, literally, in the inner man. Over in 7:5, he says, “When we came into Macedonia our flesh had no rest, but we were afflicted on every side: conflicts without, and fears within.”

And why was he so restless? Why was he so burdened, so upset, so tormented? Simply, his concern for the Corinthian church. It literally paralyzed him. It debilitated him. Would they love him? Would they respond to the letter he sent with Titus? Would they listen to him? Would they repent? Would they turn away from the mutiny organized by the false teachers? Would they abandon the divisions? Would they turn away from the incest, the quarrels, the confusion regarding marriage and divorce, the issues of idols, the Lord’s Supper, sexual sin? Would they discipline the man who shamefully accused Paul and created such a tremendous rebellion? Would they confront the false apostles? Would they acknowledge the integrity of the beloved Apostle? He didn’t know the answer to those aching questions. And he loved the church enough to ache over those issues.

And so, he says in verse 13, “I had no rest for my spirit, not finding Titus my brother.” Titus didn’t come back. Apparently, they were to rendezvous in Troas. And Paul went there to preach the gospel and prearranged a plan for him to do that and for Titus to come; but Titus didn’t come. And until Titus came, Paul was imagining the worst.

This is a dangerous hour for the preacher. His heart, at this point, is in danger of severe discouragement—danger of rebellion. And then when the door is closed, the door that once was opened, resentment may set in. There was no happiness for Paul at Troas. He had lost his zeal for the work. He had lost heart. Everything seemed to be going wrong. There was no joy anymore in his restless spirit. And there can come a real drudgery when the heart is not in it. The gold at the end of the rainbow seems a very far distance. And the temptation may come to just quit; to just say, “That’s enough—I can’t do it.” That’s where Paul was.

A wide-open door, and he had no heart to preach.

He was oversensitive. He imagined all kinds of accusations against himself—all kinds of slights and insults. And all of a sudden, the simple, normal, day-to-day, routine difficulties and problems of the ministry got magnified out of all proportion. And he was in jeopardy; in danger of becoming bitter, discontent, beginning to drift. He just had no heart for ministry.

As one writer said years ago, “Time spent in nourishing the feelings of a broken heart is time lost for eternity.” There’s really no room for that, especially where you have an open door. But how many unfaithful congregations have so debilitated their pastor? He was actually—and I’m using his word—depressed (Cast down)(7:6).

And he needed help. So he turned away from an open door. He had no zeal for the opportunity, however promising. And he couldn’t think of anything but the hassles that everybody was giving him. Sound familiar?

So he says in verse 13, “Taking my leave of them, I went on to Macedonia.” He couldn’t stay. And, no doubt, the people in Troas couldn’t make any sense out of this. Because they must have been in some kind of a euphoria. Right? I mean, the church was exploding in that place—born in just a very brief amount of time. New Christians on hand wanting desperately to be fed the Word of God, excited about reaching their city as new Christians are; and Paul is depressed. And he leaves them, and he went to Macedonia. I’m sure that he went on a route that he assumed Titus would be taking to come to Troas, in hopes that they would meet.

Perhaps, if he took a boat, it would be about a five-day boat ride, across the northeast corner of the Aegean sea, then on foot. And maybe, somehow he got word to Titus about the path he was taking; we don’t know.

By the way, the Corinthians did respond positively to the the Apostle. He was encouraged when he finally met Titus. The response was good, and he became encouraged and comforted by the meeting with Titus, as chapter 7 says. But it wasn’t enough to totally end his discouragement. Though it was generally a good response, he knew that the false teachers were still there. Some of the rebellion was still there. It wouldn’t die easily. And if he really thought it was completely over, why would he write 13 chapters in this epistle to them, after Titus had come to him? No, he knew there were still deep problems.

The question is, how is he gonna deal with his discouragement? And that’s what I want to address today. How is he gonna deal with his discouragement? Well, it doesn’t take him long, at least with his pen. Look at verse 14; here’s how it starts.

Our victory is in Christ.

Adrian Rogers Sermon Archive (Introduction)

The Bible admits the possibility of defeat for the child of God, but never the necessity of it.

Celebrate the Victor!

2 Corinthians 2:14 (KJV 1900)

14 Now thanks be unto God, which always causeth us to triumph in Christ, and maketh manifest the savour of his knowledge by us in every place.

Triumph -

If you were to go to Rome—to the Roman forum—there, you would see an arch called the Arch of Triumph, which actually celebrates Titus’ victory over Jerusalem—the emperor, or the general, Titus, who conquered and subjugated Jerusalem. And that’s what Paul is writing about—the same thing that that arch was built for.

The Romans had a custom that, when a Roman general would go away to a war and he would win the victory for war, they would celebrate in the streets of Rome.

Triumphs didn’t happen very often.

But in an actual triumph, the procession of the victorious general marched through the streets of Rome all the way to the capitol. And you can even read about the sequence of that march and the order of the people in the parade itself. First, there came the state officials and the Senate—always the politicians. Then there came the trumpeters, who were heralding what was coming. Then came the spoils taken from the conquered land, carted along.

For example, when Titus conquered Jerusalem in 70 A.D., the seven-branched candlesticks, the golden table of shewbread, the golden trumpets were carried through the streets of Rome in his triumph. Then there came some painted pictures of the conquered land and some models (can you believe it?) of conquered citadels and conquered ships. Then there followed the white bull, which was gonna be offered as a sacrifice to the gods. Then there came the wretched captives, the enemy princes, leaders, and generals in chains, shortly to be flung into prison and, in all probability, to be executed. Then there came the, what were called lictors, or punishers, who were beating these people with rods. And then there came the musicians. And then there came the priests swinging their censors with the sweet-smelling incense burning.And then came the general himself after all of this huge entourage. He was in a chariot drawn by four horses, he was clad in a purple tunic embroidered with gold and palm leaves, and over it a purple toga marked out with golden stars. In his hand he had an ivory scepter with a Roman eagle on the top of it, and over his head a slave held the crown of Jupiter. And after him rode his family. And finally, at the very end, came the army wearing all their decorations and shouting, “Triumph! Triumph! Triumph!” I mean, it’s a pretty impressive scene.

Did you know that the same word for herald that was used for this man, and for a preacher of the gospel, is the same word in the Greek language?

Do you know what a preacher is? He’s someone who stands before you and says, “Jesus has won.”

We have the victory; and so, that’s what preaching is—it’s just simply announcing the victory that the Lord Jesus Christ has won. How beautiful are the feet of them that tell the good news of the gospel of Christ! (Romans 10:15). We are on the winning side. Jesus has defeated the enemy.

When that herald would come and tell people that Rome had won the victory, then, they got ready for a celebration. They would hang out garlands and festoon the city with flowers. They would build, as I say, monuments. People would line the streets and get ready for a parade, and the priest would take great bowls of incense and begin to burn that incense. The whole city would be filled with the sweet smell of victory.

Our Victory is in Christ.

Your Victory is in Christ.

That’s what makes him say, “Thanks be to God. Whatever may be going wrong in my ministry—whatever may be disappointing me and depressing me and discouraging me, I am in the triumphal parade.”

Colossians 2:13–15 (KJV 1900)

13 And you, being dead in your sins and the uncircumcision of your flesh, hath he quickened together with him, having forgiven you all trespasses;

14 Blotting out the handwriting of ordinances that was against us, which was contrary to us, and took it out of the way, nailing it to his cross;

15 And having spoiled principalities and powers, he made a shew of them openly, triumphing over them in it.

Delivered You from Death!

Colossians 2:13 (KJV 1900)

13 And you, being dead in your sins and the uncircumcision of your flesh, hath he quickened together with him, having forgiven you all trespasses;

Delivered You from Debt!

Colossians 2:13–14 (KJV 1900)

13 And you, ... having forgiven you all trespasses; 14 Blotting out the handwriting of ordinances that was against us, which was contrary to us, and took it out of the way, nailing it to his cross;

Delivered You from the Devil!

Colossians 2:15 (KJV 1900)

15 And having spoiled principalities and powers, he made a shew of them openly, triumphing over them in it.

Choose the Victory!

2 Corinthians 2:14 (KJV 1900)

14 Now thanks be unto God, which always causeth us to triumph in Christ, and maketh manifest the savour of his knowledge by us in every place.

Put a circle around “always,” and put a circle around “every place.” And then, look up here, and tell me, when He said, “always,” and, “every place,” what He left out. Nothing.

It is not that you triumph sometimes. You triumph always, and in every place. There is no time that the child of God is not to be victorious.

In your circumstances, in your family, in your job, in your health, in your finances—where you are, right now—you are to be always triumphant in every place.

Well, pastor, you just don’t understand. I do understand it is a mindset.

Remember back to verse 12 and 13, Paul said, “I came to Troas to preach. Titus wasn’t there. Everything got messed up. I had to go over to Macedonia. My plan fell to the ground. I lost an opportunity, but I’m still triumphant—I’m still triumphant.”

2 Corinthians 4:8–9 (KJV 1900)

8 We are troubled on every side, yet not distressed; we are perplexed, but not in despair;

9 Persecuted, but not forsaken; cast down, but not destroyed;

Troubled - but not “distressed”—that is, “not without hope”

What’s troubling you?

Perplexed - The word perplexed means, “I don’t know; I can’t understand it.” “There is no way out, but I’m not in despair.”

Persecuted - “but not forsaken” -

Have you got some enemies?

Cast down - “but not destroyed” -

Do you know what that means? It means, “Knocked down, but not knocked out.” Satan is counting over you, “One, two, three, four, five—uh oh, he’s getting up again. I’ve thought I’m done with him.”

Friend, he’ll never be done with us, because Jesus has finished him, and we have the victory in our Lord Jesus Christ.

Paul knew trouble. He knew heartache; he knew pain; he knew anguish; he knew temptations and trials. But he said, “Thanks be unto God, who always causes us to triumph in Christ Jesus” (2 Corinthians 2:14).

Clarify Your Victory!

2 Corinthians 2:14–17 (KJV 1900)

14 Now thanks be unto God, which always causeth us to triumph in Christ, and maketh manifest the savour of his knowledge by us in every place.

15 For we are unto God a sweet savour of Christ, in them that are saved, and in them that perish:

16 To the one we are the savour of death unto death; and to the other the savour of life unto life. And who is sufficient for these things?

17 For we are not as many, which corrupt the word of God: but as of sincerity, but as of God, in the sight of God speak we in Christ.

Now as the priest in Rome would burn incense, what is the incense that is burned because of the victory of Christ? It is my life and your life.

Look, if you will, in verse 15:

It is my life and your life. Look, if you will, in verse 15: “For we are unto God a sweet savour of Christ” (2 Corinthians 2:15).

And why do we do this? Well, look in verse 14: “We make manifest the savor”—the perfume—“of his knowledge by us in every place” (2 Corinthians 2:14). When we, in adversity, in trial, in heartache, in persecution, in distress, in necessities, when we then praise God, and then stand in the victory that we have in the Lord Jesus Christ, it is then, dear friend, that our lives become perfume, and we give a testimony to the fact that Christ has won the victory.

Listen carefully, when you have heartache, and fears, and tears, and distress, and perplexity, I want you to open your Bible, and I want you to say, “Hallelujah! Thanks be unto God, who causes us always to triumph in Christ Jesus.”

Satan has been defeated—he has been stripped; he has been shamed; he has been subdued. He sails a sinking ship; he rules a doomed domain. Jesus has won, and never forget it! We are triumphant in the Lord Jesus Christ. We have victory in Christ. But this verse—verse 16—says, “We are a savor of life unto life, and death unto death” (2 Corinthians 2:16). If Jesus’ victory does not save you, it will condemn you. You’re on one side of the cross or the other.

Which side of the battle are you on?

Life or Death