Put On Gentleness

22 But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, 23 gentleness, and self-control. The law is not against such things.

So far we have studied love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness and faithfulness. This morning we will look at gentleness, as we try to understand how to take on more of the character of Christ as we live our daily lives.

We have read previously from this sermon from 1 Peter, where the Apostle Peter addressed the slaves and stressed the importance of submission. We return to this passage looking for some insight into the character of gentleness...

1 Peter 2:20–25 CSB

20 For what credit is there if when you do wrong and are beaten, you endure it? But when you do what is good and suffer, if you endure it, this brings favor with God. 21 For you were called to this, because Christ also suffered for you, leaving you an example, that you should follow in his steps. 22 He did not commit sin, and no deceit was found in his mouth; 23 when he was insulted, he did not insult in return; when he suffered, he did not threaten but entrusted himself to the one who judges justly. 24 He himself bore our sins in his body on the tree; so that, having died to sins, we might live for righteousness. By his wounds you have been healed. 25 For you were like sheep going astray, but you have now returned to the Shepherd and Overseer of your souls.

[pray]

We referred to this passage a few weeks ago when we talked about kindness and goodness. It’s no great surprise that gentleness would be included alongside these other traits. And as we reflect on the ministry of Jesus Christ, we can certainly find examples of these traits as he walked alongside his disciples and ministered to people in need.

Paul used the words meek and gentle to describe Christ’s character and applied the terms to himself, along with the word humble to describe the way that he interacted with the believers. However, Paul also knew when to adopt a gentle character and when to be bold, as we can see in this warning in 2 Corinthians 10...

2 Corinthians 10:1–2 CSB

1 Now I, Paul, myself, appeal to you by the meekness and gentleness of Christ—I who am humble among you in person but bold toward you when absent. 2 I beg you that when I am present I will not need to be bold with the confidence by which I plan to challenge certain people who think we are living according to the flesh.

Paul uses the Greek word πραΰτης (prautēs), which we translate as “meekness” in English and ἐπιείκεια (epieikeia), which is translated as “gentleness.” For “humble” he uses the Greek word ταπεινός (tapeinos. All of these words are so closely related, that they almost seem to be interchangeable within scripture. Before we dig into our text, let’s get a sense for what these words mean.

Meekness - πραΰτης (prautēs) - this word seems to be almost interchangeable with gentleness and humility. It carries a sense of “acting in a manner that is gentle, mild, and even-tempered.” There is also a sense here that the person who is meek is considerate of others.

Gentleness - ἐπιείκεια (epieikeia) - this word is closely connected with kindness and fairness. It carries a sense of gentle clemency, that is to say, a leniency and compassion toward those who have given offense.

Humility - ταπεινός (tapeinos) - this word essentially means “lowly” though it is often extended to mean “lowly in spirit.” This means that it applies to the way that one views self or interacts with others. It carries a sense of meekness or modesty and lacks any appearance of arrogance or pride.

When we look at these traits in comparison with each other, we get a fuller sense of the character that we have within us because we have Christ.

However, we live in a world that does not promote these traits. In our culture, we value the person who is bold in both character and speech. We value the person who has a sense of self-pride. Beyond teaching our small children to be gentle with others, there is very little character training that goes into humility.

This is precisely the character that we can see in Jesus. We can look at Jesus’ encounter with the adulterous woman in John 8...

John 8:2–11 CSB

2 At dawn he went to the temple again, and all the people were coming to him. He sat down and began to teach them. 3 Then the scribes and the Pharisees brought a woman caught in adultery, making her stand in the center. 4 “Teacher,” they said to him, “this woman was caught in the act of committing adultery. 5 In the law Moses commanded us to stone such women. So what do you say?” 6 They asked this to trap him, in order that they might have evidence to accuse him. Jesus stooped down and started writing on the ground with his finger. 7 When they persisted in questioning him, he stood up and said to them, “The one without sin among you should be the first to throw a stone at her.” 8 Then he stooped down again and continued writing on the ground. 9 When they heard this, they left one by one, starting with the older men. Only he was left, with the woman in the center. 10 When Jesus stood up, he said to her, “Woman, where are they? Has no one condemned you?” 11 “No one, Lord,” she answered. “Neither do I condemn you,” said Jesus. “Go, and from now on do not sin anymore.”]

This incident is a perfect example the way that Jesus practiced these characteristics in him ministry. Jesus was kind, gentle, humble, and compassionate with the adulterous woman. While we have at times been trained in our culture to look at Jesus’ response to the Pharisees and cheer for him like we cheer for the lead character in a movie when they get a verbal win against their arch rival. In fact Jesus’ response was gentle and humble, instructing them toward a gentle and humble response toward the woman’s sin.

We can also see these traits being taught by apostles. Paul teaches the Colossian church to put on these characteristics like we would put on a jacket...

Colossians 3:12 CSB

12 Therefore, as God’s chosen ones, holy and dearly loved, put on compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience,

These traits are required in the elders and deacons as well as other leaders in the church...

1 Timothy 3:2–3 CSB

2 An overseer, therefore, must be above reproach, the husband of one wife, self-controlled, sensible, respectable, hospitable, able to teach, 3 not an excessive drinker, not a bully but gentle, not quarrelsome, not greedy.

And they are required of any who would seek to pastor within the church setting...

2 Timothy 2:22–25 CSB

22 Flee from youthful passions, and pursue righteousness, faith, love, and peace, along with those who call on the Lord from a pure heart. 23 But reject foolish and ignorant disputes, because you know that they breed quarrels. 24 The Lord’s servant must not quarrel, but must be gentle to everyone, able to teach, and patient, 25 instructing his opponents with gentleness. Perhaps God will grant them repentance leading them to the knowledge of the truth.

Principle: The church is no place for ego and arrogance or strife among the body.

With that being said, there are times in the church for boldness and times for gentleness. We should always be gentle and mild with each other until there comes a time that we must be bold.

I often see in the church that there are times that the leadership must make a bold decision that sometimes ruffles feathers in the membership. At times I have heard bold proclamations against the leadership for making this or that decision. I have even seen people choose to leave the church over decisions that have been made. This kind of behavior is not acting in the character of Christ but in a spirit of opposition.

I don’t want to belabor this point, but I will say that there are times that church leadership has to make unpopular decisions, but they are acting in the best interest of the larger body and attempting to do it in a way that should be clear and above reproach by the entire church.

If you are a member of FBC Pharr, you have the right to ask any questions of leadership and you have a voice in church business meetings (but you have to show up to have your voice heard). While the leaders in the church are not always at liberty of discussing the fine details of certain situations, we can certainly answer questions and maintain accountability before the church membership for any decisions that are made.

Let’s return to our core text in 1 Peter...

I. Peter on Submission During Suffering

While Peter is addressing the believing slaves here, we can draw certain parallels in our daily lives. While we may not be beaten by our supervisors at work, we are still in submission to them as they hold authority over us. I have found that submission is core to this characteristic of gentleness.

1 Peter 2:20 CSB

20 For what credit is there if when you do wrong and are beaten, you endure it? But when you do what is good and suffer, if you endure it, this brings favor with God.

While we may not have never been physically beaten by a supervisor at work, many of us can certainly recall having been mistreated at some point in the workplace. I can recall several business upsets or workplace injustices or even church decisions that I felt were unfair at the time.

I can’t say that I always acted with humility and meekness in these cases. In fact, there are a few instances that I sometimes wish I could have a do-over. But I think that might be true of all of us if we really understand these principles and try to practice them in our lives.

So Peter is advising the slaves to endure any injustice so that God might be glorified through their longsuffering. This takes patience and peace, as well as humility.

While gentleness requires great humility and vulnerability, it also requires great strength when one is purposefully choosing gentleness.

II. Christ’s Own Gentleness Is Our Example

Paul points back to the gentleness of Christ, urging the believer to “follow in his steps"...

1 Peter 2:21–23 CSB

21 For you were called to this, because Christ also suffered for you, leaving you an example, that you should follow in his steps. 22 He did not commit sin, and no deceit was found in his mouth; 23 when he was insulted, he did not insult in return; when he suffered, he did not threaten but entrusted himself to the one who judges justly.

This should be our ambition as believers in Christ. Rather than ambition toward success or power or getting our own way, we should desire to have this gentleness of Christ on display before the world.

In fact, gentleness might just be one of the most important characteristics that set us apart from the world. It should be buried so deep within our character as to define us in the eyes of the world. Look at Paul’s words in the letter that we call Ephesians...

Ephesians 4:1–6 CSB

1 Therefore I, the prisoner in the Lord, urge you to walk worthy of the calling you have received, 2 with all humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another in love, 3 making every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace. 4 There is one body and one Spirit—just as you were called to one hope at your calling— 5 one Lord, one faith, one baptism, 6 one God and Father of all, who is above all and through all and in all.

He echoes a closely connected message in his letter to the Philippian church...

Philippians 4:5–7 CSB

5 Let your graciousness be known to everyone. The Lord is near. 6 Don’t worry about anything, but in everything, through prayer and petition with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. 7 And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus.

Jesus taught his disciples to be humble and gentle servant leaders. As James and John grasped at power and authority for the right hand of Jesus Christ, the disciples grew jealous and began to quarrel...

Mark 10:41–45 CSB

41 When the ten disciples heard this, they began to be indignant with James and John. 42 Jesus called them over and said to them, “You know that those who are regarded as rulers of the Gentiles lord it over them, and those in high positions act as tyrants over them. 43 But it is not so among you. On the contrary, whoever wants to become great among you will be your servant, 44 and whoever wants to be first among you will be a slave to all. 45 For even the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many.”

Servant leaders require a sense of humility, compassion and gentleness. It also requires a resolve that speaks to our strength of character.

III. Christ’s Gentleness & Submission Led Him to the Cross

Jesus gentle and humble spirit was on display as he went to the cross to be slaughtered. In fact, Jesus submitted himself unto his death on the cross...

1 Peter 2:24–25 CSB

24 He himself bore our sins in his body on the tree; so that, having died to sins, we might live for righteousness. By his wounds you have been healed. 25 For you were like sheep going astray, but you have now returned to the Shepherd and Overseer of your souls.

Paul encourages us to be like sheep under the Great Shepherd, Jesus Christ.

There are paradoxes here that ripple throughout the Christian life:

We die to self so that we might be glorified in Christ.

We die to sin so that we might live in righteousness.

By Christ’s wounds, we find healing.

We lead in humility, so that we might find the power of Christ.

IV. Another Example of Gentleness & Submission

I want to look briefly at the following section, one that is controversial, but full of meaning for us as we seek this humility.

Peter switches from speaking to the slaves to speaking to married couples. There is advice here for wives and husbands.

Let me start with the wives, not because women deserve special instruction in this area, but because that is where Peter starts...

A. Wives Submit to Your Husbands

I want for you to think about these passages in the context of the household habits of Peter’s day and in the greater context of Peter’s discussion about power and authority.

1 Peter 3:1–2 CSB

1 In the same way, wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands so that, even if some disobey the word, they may be won over without a word by the way their wives live 2 when they observe your pure, reverent lives.

I know some women who bristle against the advice in this passage and I know a few women who embrace it and live it out daily.

Our culture teaches women to be strong and independent and to strive for power and authority. I’m certainly not against women. After all, I’m married to one of the great ones. And my wife is strong and empowered. She runs a successful counseling practice and has been my strength and, at times, my shield.

However, my wife is also a great example of submission. In our marriage we practice and teach others about mutual submission. We seek to serve each other and seek each others’ counsel, and we make decisions in our marriage together, with full participation by both of us.

However, Peter is addressing a different kind of marriage here. Just as he addressed slaves that were being mistreated by their masters, he is also addressing wives that are bonded in marriage to a husband who is not practicing the grace and peace of Jesus Christ, but acting in his flesh.

Peter takes the unpopular stance of telling these wives to submit to their ungodly husbands. He tells them to endure and live a life that will remind their husbands of the characteristics of Christ.

I want to be clear here that Peter is not advising women who are in danger to stay with a spouse who is abusing them. I have know some pastors to give unwise advice to women in difficult circumstances. This unwise advice has led to many unhappy marriages that are not lived out reflecting the character of Christ. I would encourage women to keep themselves and their children safe in an abusive situation. However, where possible seek to provide good witness and testimony of the character of Christ in you whenever possible.

This passage is about women in a culture where most of the time they had no power or status and were sometimes treated like slaves or even as property. In these situations, the counsel of scripture is to not chafe against the lower position, but use it as an opportunity to show others how Christ would respond in a similar situation. Submission, gentleness, and humility will go a long ways toward showing others the character of Christ in the midst of difficult situations. This is what Peter is saying here.

B. Husbands Be Gentle and Understanding

Now, husbands, you don’t get off too easy here. Peter goes on to give advise to husbands here...

1 Peter 3:7 CSB

7 Husbands, in the same way, live with your wives in an understanding way, as with a weaker partner, showing them honor as coheirs of the grace of life, so that your prayers will not be hindered.

It is too easy for husbands to bask in the glow of power and authority, without being caring and understanding towards their wives. I know of many husbands who belittle and demean their spouses at any opportunity. Whenever my wife or I observe this behavior, it gives us insight into the marriage relationship and into the underlying character of those we are observing.

Paul echoes Peter’s sentiments for husbands and wives in Ephesians 5. He gives husbands the difficult task of caring for their wives...

Ephesians 5:25–30 CSB

25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself for her 26 to make her holy, cleansing her with the washing of water by the word. 27 He did this to present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or anything like that, but holy and blameless. 28 In the same way, husbands are to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29 For no one ever hates his own flesh but provides and cares for it, just as Christ does for the church, 30 since we are members of his body.

I don’t know many women who would balk at submitting to a husband who is gentle and humble and caring and loving. The problem comes when they have been exposed to men who have not been gentle and caring and loving in their lives and as a result, they have trust issues. And who could blame them when they have a poor example in mind and think this is the way that all marriages are.

Conclusion

Now that I’ve stirred up that hornet’s nest, let’s wrap this up and bring it to a close.

Slaves with their masters. Employees with their bosses. Husbands and wives living the Christian life together (or trying to live with a spouse who is not living the Christian life)...

These are all examples of living in situations where submission, gentleness, and humility are difficult.

To bear the character of Christ within is to live before the world in a way that demonstrates the characteristics of Christ. This means that we are to live in a way that rubs against culture and exposes them to traits and characteristics that are new and surprising to them.

However, I would remind you that we must have Christ with us as savior in order to have his character within us. And once we have Christ, we must work to live out his character on a daily basis and practice these characteristics within our daily lives.

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