2022-10-02 Prayer - Introduction to the PAPA Prayer

The answer is this, “Man's chief end (purpose) is to glorify God, and to enjoy him forever.” I like the answer. Glorifying God is an amazing purpose. We were created by him, in his image, and if we live that image correctly, it brings glory to God. That makes sense to me. However, the second part of the answer in the catechism is harder for me to understand. “Enjoy him forever”. (blank) How do you enjoy God forever? What does that look like? The forever part makes me think of being in heaven or the new earth and being in his presence. I think then I will know how to enjoy God, but I struggle to understand what it means to enjoy God in the here and now. And here and now are part of my forever.

What does it mean to enjoy God?

I enjoy eating my favourite foods. I can savour each flavour and ultimately enjoy the feeling of being full. Is that what enjoying God is like? I think there are some similarities, Psalm 19:10 and 119:103 both speak of God’s law, his instruction, as sweeter than honey and Jesus said unless we eat his flesh and drink his blood, we will have no life. So we do need to ‘eat’ God to live, but is God just something we consume?

Does enjoying God mean we enjoy what he does for us? The blessings he gives us? That doesn’t seem quite right. When I think of enjoying my kids, I don’t think simply of what they do for me.

Does it mean we enjoy serving him? Again, when I think of my children, I do enjoy serving them, but that’s not what comes to mind when I think of enjoying them.

Enjoying God would seem to be a lot like enjoying people. When I enjoy people, I don’t consume them. When I enjoy people it’s not just because of what they do for me. When I enjoy people it’s not just because I enjoy serving them. I enjoy my family by being with them. Doing things together. Appreciating beauty together, hanging out, playing games, enjoying the conversation. Enjoying the companionship of people is what I think of when I think of enjoying God.

Lack of Companionship Style Prayer

Do you enjoy companionship with God? Do you enjoy hanging out with him? Brennan Manning once told Larry Crabb that he was going to a weeklong prayer retreat. Larry Crabb asked him, “What does a week like that do for you? How does God respond to your praying for a week?” I don’t know about you, but that is exactly the kind of questions I would have asked. I find Brennan’s response both wonderful and refreshing but also a rebuke. After looking at Larry Crabb quizzically he said, “I’ve never thought about what I get out of it. I just figure God likes it when I show up.”

For most of us, a weeklong prayer retreat isn’t a possibility but if it was, would you want to? What emotions come up inside of you when you think of spending a week in prayer with God? Elation? Joy? Longing? Or is it more like apprehension? Fear? Okay, forget about a week. What about just one day. Is that any better? Do you think you would know how to enjoy hanging out with God for a day or a week? I think if we’re honest, most of us would struggle with a few hours or even for ten minutes. Right?

When we think of prayer, most of us think of asking God for things, praising him, confessing sin, etc. All legitimate aspects of prayer. But how often do you think of prayer as a real conversation with God like you would have with your friend? If I picked you up for lunch, how would you respond if I began our time together by saying, “I need you to come by our house tonight, Corrina and I need your advice about something. And could you run by the drugstore and pick up our prescription? Then, when we sit down for lunch, I tell you about how our kids are doing and how I’d like you to help them, and oh, by the way, I’m struggling financially right now, could you give me a little money to tide us over until the next paycheque? To be honest with you, I kind of hope you’d pick up the tab for the meal I’m about to order.” And that would be it. How would you feel if my entire conversation with you was like that? And yet, that’s how many of us talk to God. And that’s it. I don’t know about you, but that doesn’t sound like much of a relationship. Not that it’s wrong in and of itself to ask for things from God, in fact, Jesus taught us to ask for our daily bread and in Philippians 4:6 Paul said, “Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.” God wants us to come to him like a little child with our requests and ask them. He is our Father. But what little child only asks for things from their parents? My children have also wanted to spend time with me and do things with me. They still do. The asks come out of a trusting, loving relationship.

How do we do that with God? The reality is that even though God is a person, he’s unlike any other person we have a relationship with. For starters, he’s invisible to us. We can’t see him when we talk to him. Everyone else we talk to we can see, unless we’re on the phone, or in another room. But this points out another difference. When I’m on the phone, I can hear the other person audibly talking to me. I’ve never heard God audibly talk to me. I know I’ve experienced his leading, I know I’ve sensed the Spirit directing me, but audibly, no. I have not experienced what Moses and Elijah did. How do you have a conversation with someone who doesn’t talk back? It’s hard. I’ve talked to people when they’ve been unconscious or in an induced coma. I quickly run out of words to say. There’s a reason that most radio hosts find it easier if there are two people hosting together and they can have a conversation with each other.

And yet, I hunger for relational prayer with God. I want more than just giving him a list of requests, or rote prayer, like reciting the Lord’s prayer. I want to know God and be known by him. And the crazy thing is, I need it more than I even want it. What about you?

Larry Crabb’s Book

For our current sermon series on Hungering to Know and be Known, I planned to have a sermon this week on prayer. So on Monday I went to my bookshelf and took off 9 or 10 books either on prayer of that have a section on prayer. They’re good books. They talk about many great aspects of prayer, principles of prayer and methods of prayer. Then I remembered a book that I picked up earlier this year by Larry Crabb. Larry Crabb was a psychologist who realized that his psychology wasn’t helping his patients and wasn’t at all connected to his faith. He then wrote quite a few books on Biblical Counselling, some of which I have. But he was never satisfied and kept learning and striving to both grow in his faith and grow in his ability to help people heal and help them connect with God. He slowly moved away from counselling and towards spiritual direction. Crabb died in February of 2021. The book I picked up earlier this year is called The PAPA Prayer, it was written in 2006. (Just so you know, Larry Crabb wrote 9 more books after that one, 27 in all!) I was drawn to the book because I struggle with prayer. When I first got it, I picked it up and was quickly drawn in. At the beginning he has a section called, “An Invitation to Pray”. I’ll read an excerpt. Some of it will be on the screen.

“This book is for people who long to hear God’s voice, who want to know God so well that His life actually becomes theirs.

Let me ask you nine questions to see if this describes you:

Ever ask for something from God that you didn’t receive?

Ever pray for guidance, especially in a difficult relationship, that never came?

Ever really need to hear God’s voice and then try to believe you did, even though you weren’t sure?

My answer is yes to all three questions. What’s yours? Here are a few more:

Do you sometimes feel that God is turning a deaf ear to your most desperate prayer requests?

Have you ever prayed for comfort yet ended up feeling more empty and alone after you prayed?

Has praying for strength to overcome temptation ever left you feeling just as weak and the temptation just as strong, or even stronger?

How did you answer these questions? I answered yes. The three final questions reach a little deeper:

Do you know God well enough to enjoy His company, the same way you enjoy being with a family member or close friend?

Do you want to know God better and enjoy Him more than you know and enjoy anyone else?

Do you connect with God in such a way that enables you to hear His voice and to know He’s right there with you?

For years I’ve wished I could answer yes to those final three questions. But I’ve had to say no.” (blank)

P XVII-XVIII, The Papa Prayer

Some of you will have been able to say yes to the last three questions. If that’s you I’m so happy for you. If it’s not, I identify with you. Much of the time I have to say I don’t experience what he’s asking with the last three question, and, if I’m honest, much of the time I don’t desire connecting with God. My desire for God comes and goes. I’m busy, I carry on with life. But other times I do, or I want to desire it. Deep down, I realize that God is the source of life and his light draws me. The Sons of Korah, in the First Testament captured this longing well. Listen as Luann reads Psalm 42.

Luann read Psalm 42. (blank)

Larry Crabb goes on to say this,

“For years I’ve prayed as if the real purpose of prayer were to get things I want from God. And I thought those things were the obvious blessings of life, the things we all want that make our lives happier, more meaningful and satisfying. But I’m coming to see that what I most want is Him. I want to know Him, trust in Him, hear His voice, and experience His power to live the way He tells me to, whether things go my way or not. That, I’m discovering, gives me a kind of solid joy nothing else provides.

With a quiet excitement I’ve rarely known, I can say that the Holy Spirit through the Bible has led me into a new way to pray that is bringing me to another level of closeness with God.”

P XIX, The Papa Prayer

The PAPA Prayer

This prayer Crabb calls the PAPA prayer. So what is the PAPA prayer? I am hesitant to call it a method. I like the words principles or process better. The word papa is an endearing word that some people use for their father. Crabb’s father used it for his father. God is our father and both Jesus and Paul used the used the Aramaic word Abba, an endearing word for Father similar to Daddy. Abba, Papa and daddy or dad all suggest intimacy and a close father-son relationship, Larry Crabb has taken the word Papa and developed an acronym with the letters of the word. (blank)

Before I get to the acronym, I want to first show a set of diagrams that illustrate how Larry Crabb is trying to help us reorient how we pray.

A Me Centred Prayer Life

18954754286250Relating00RelatingRelatingRelating18954753895725Worship00WorshipWorshipWorship17526003476625Thanksgiving00ThanksgivingThanksgivingThanksgiving17621253067050Intercession00IntercessionIntercessionIntercession19050002695575Petition00PetitionPetitionPetition

Relating

Worship

Thanksgiving

Intercession

Petition

Gimme!, Gimme!, Gimme! – Bless me dear God, Give me the good life of fulfillment and joy.

Change Things for my Sake – Work in others and in my circumstances with my well-being in view

Thank you for my blessings – You’re useful, I like it, Keep it up!

Here’s my tip for Good service – I’ll sing and praise you for what you’ve given me, hey, worship is easy. All I have to do is work up fervent emotions, sacrifice isn’t required.

Tell me what to do to keep the good times rolling – I’ll do my part as long as you do yours

A Relationally-Centred Prayer Life

17525992545080Relational00RelationalRelationalRelational17621252903855Worship00WorshipWorshipWorship16668753268980Thanksgiving00ThanksgivingThanksgivingThanksgiving16573503678555Intercession00IntercessionIntercessionIntercession18192754037330Petition00PetitionPetitionPetition

Relational

Worship

Thanksgiving

Intercession

Petition

Draw near and listen – Remain in Christ, let God’s word remain in you.

Bend low as a living sacrifice = Surrender every ‘second thing’ to gain union with God

In every circumstance give thanks – Thank God for the unique opportunity every blessing of trial presents to delight God’s heard and reveal him to others.

May your kingdom come through others – Change people’s hearts so that they long to advance your will

With the mind of Christ, Ask and receive – petitions grow out of a desire for God. . . expressed by the Spirit’s groaning, discerned by the Father’s searching, furthering the Son’s joy. (blank)

P34, 35, The Papa Prayer

Do you see the difference? You start with relational prayer before you get to the other, very legitimate, aspects of prayer. The difference that it makes is that the other aspects of prayer then come out of relationship and are then also shaped by the relationship. This happens all the time in our personal relationships with the important people in our lives. When you have a deep, intimate relationship with someone, your requests and thanks and words of appreciation come out of your relationship and are shaped by that relationship. Most of us do not talk to the clerk behind the desk the same way we talk to someone who knows us deeply.

Just so you know, the descriptors on the side of these diagrams are Larry Crabb’s descriptors. I think that with the first diagram they’re too negative. I don’t assume that all Christians have these attitudes in their prayers even if they pray in this order. I think you can have the correct attitudes that are listed in the second chart in the order of the first chart. I also think that the order of our prayers has a lot to do with circumstances. When there is an emergency, I’m going to ask first and relate later. Having said that, I think that Crabb is making an important point. The order of our prayer life does to a certain extent, reflect what we think is important. It reveals some things about how we think about God and what our relationship with him is like.

So again, what is the PAPA prayer that forms this relational core? Here it is in a nutshell.

“P: Present yourself to God without pretense. Be a real person in the relationship. Tell him whatever is going on inside you that you can identify.

A: Attend to how you’re thinking of God. Again, no pretending. Ask yourself, “How am I experiencing God right now? Is he a vending machine, a frowning father, a distant, cold force? Or is He your gloriously strong but intimate Papa?

P: Purge yourself of anything blocking your relationship with God. Put into words whatever makes you uncomfortable or embarrassed when you’re real in your relationship with Him. How are you thinking more about yourself and your satisfaction than about anyone else, including God and his pleasure?

A: Approach God as the ‘first thing’ in your life, as your most valuable treasure, the Person you most want to know. Admit that other people and things really do matter more to you right now, but you long to want God so much that every other good thing in your live becomes a ‘second-thing’ desire.” (blank)

P10, The Papa Prayer

Conclusion

Stay tuned, the next four times I preach I’m going to preach on these four aspects of praying. I will be pulling a lot from Larry Crabb’s book, but I will also give the scripture that supports these practices. As we look at these practices in the next month, I encourage you to begin putting them into practice. It is my prayer and hope that all of us will be able grow much deeper in our relationship with God. Dr. Rob Reimer says, “You can have as much of Jesus as you want. But you must be willing to pay the price.” In James 4:8 James said, “Come near to God and he will come near to you.” My goal over the next four weeks is to help us learn these principles so that we will be able to come as near to God as possible.

Pray

Benediction: 1 Thessalonians 3:12a, 13

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