Joseph & Mary - A Young Couple's Perspective

Introduction: we’ve decided to split the Christmas story into 5 parts: Gabriel’s visit to Mary, Joseph’s dream of Gabriel, The journey to Bethlehem, the birth of Jesus, and the visit of the Shepherds. For each part we will have a particular verse from that passage to start off with and then we’ll dive into what Mary or Joseph might have been thinking and feeling.

Part 1 - Mary’s Visit

Our verse for the first part: Gabriel’s visit to Mary is from Luke 1:38 “And Mary said, “Behold, I am the servant of the Lord; let it be to me according to your word.” And the angel departed from her.”

I can almost picture the scene… Mary is alone grinding flour for her family’s bread that day, maybe humming a tune to herself, when suddenly the room explodes with light.   His greeting was bizarre, to say the least, “Greetings favoured one, the Lord is with you!”  This would have gotten her attention, it would have gotten her wondering. She must have been somewhat afraid at least, maybe alarm flashed across her face, for the angel continued and said “Do not be afraid Mary for you have found favour with God.”  Ok, not quite so strange, but to say what he says next?  That she, a virgin, will conceive and have a child?  That the child will be the Son of God?  Hold on a second! Maybe she needs to drink some more water, because this is too crazy to be real, right?  But her curiosity gets the better of her and she asks for more details… how can she have a child when she is a virgin?  The answer was a simple one: The Holy Spirit.  And she is given a sign just to prove that the angel is telling the truth: her barren cousin is also pregnant!  All of this sparks faith within Mary and she submits herself to God’s will.  “Behold, I am the servant of the Lord; let it be to me according to your word”.  The emotions here!  The confusion turning to wonder turning to faith-filled obedience!  Would I be brave enough to do this, to say yes to God?  She is unmarried, engaged to a good man, and yet she has to figure out how she is going to explain to her fiancé, to her family, to the whole town that she is having a baby but has not been unfaithful?  She knows what everyone will think… no one is going to believe that a simple girl from Galilee will bear the Messiah, that’s not what everyone expects!  They will think she is just making up a story to cover up the truth.  And yet she still says yes, which we see in the verse we started off with.

Part 2 - Joseph’s dream:

The verse for part 2: Joseph’s dream is from Matthew 1:24 “When Joseph woke from sleep, he did as the angel of the Lord commanded him: he took his wife”.

I can imagine that finding out that Mary was pregnant and knowing for a fact that the child is not yours was probably one of the hardest things that Joseph would have had to face. Feelings of betrayal, feelings of genuine hurt and loss probably permeated his thoughts. When it says Joseph lay down to sleep my guess is not just because he was going about his normal routine went to sleep, rather that he was distraught and exhausted from everything going.

Joseph knows that the Old Testament law allows him to at least divorce Mary. Theoretically an adulteress could be stoned. But as the Gospel of Matthew notes Joseph is a just man and wants to have a no-fault divorce. Just divorce her quietly and hopefully don’t permanently ruin her life. So while Joseph goes to bed having figured out what he’s going to do, that doesn't make anything easier and Im sure it does quell any of his powerful emotions. Then an angel shows up! And in this dream he tells Joseph not to divorce Mary but instead marry her. Effectively this means that he claims responsibility not only for Mary but for their child. One of the things I know we went through as a young couple when we found out we were expecting, was a period of grief realizing that the time we had being just the two of us was coming to an end.

Joseph likewise is going to have to wrestle with this. He can’t just enjoy the time with his new bride because they will have a child, almost right away. This is huge. He going from being betrothed to being husband and father.

Waking up from a dream like that, realizing that it has to be real - it was too real to be “just a dream,” realizing that Mary is telling the truth, realizing what this means for them. Wow. Jospeh is a man who’s been on a emotional and mental rollercoaster. Yet he takes Mary as his wife - He follows through.

Part 3 – the Journey to Bethlehem

Our third part is the journey to Bethlehem, and so we chose Luke 2:1 to explain this passage. “In those days a decree went out from Caesar Augustus that all the world should be registered.”

K: When I was pregnant, even in the early stages, a long journey was so much more uncomfortable than it normally would have been.  And my journeys were all in the comfy seats of a car, never mind by foot or maybe by donkey.  The normal journey from Nazareth to Bethlehem is about four days… but when you’re heavily pregnant and waddling the whole way, it may have taken up to seven.  None of my journeys were that long, and I can say that I cannot imagine trying to do that! Those would have been gruelling days, Mary would have been exhausted. She would have felt Joseph’s concerned eyes watching her regularly and known that she couldn’t do anything about his worry. I wonder if she knew why this journey had to happen? Did she realise that in order for the prophecies about the Messiah to be fulfilled He had to be born in Bethlehem? Or did she just think it was yet another oppression of the Romans and their emperor, forcing her to endure this journey while pregnant? Either way, she had to approach it with faith that God would see her through, otherwise I doubt she would have made it.

J: If I learned everything from watching Katie go through pregnancy, it’s that every woman and every pregnancy is different.  Mary’s story is no different. Mary’s pregnancy could have been an easy pregnancy. Or, it could have been extremely difficult.  Maybe she had awful morning sickness all the way through. Maybe she needed what equated to 1st-century bed rest for most of the time. (Although, considering they travelled all the way to Bethlehem, probably not). Joseph was probably hyperaware of Mary the whole trip to Bethlehem. You know when your wife is pregnant that everything just needs more time, and more care. Mary would have been in a more fragile state. For Jospeh, that journey was yet another test his character. Both to serve His wife and have patience, and to ultimately trust the One who had this child to them both in the first place.

Part 4 – Jesus is born

Part 4 is perhaps the most wonder-filled, so we selected Luke 2:7 “And she gave birth to her firstborn son and wrapped him in swaddling cloths and laid him in a manger, because there was no place for them in the inn.”

K: The Bible account makes it seems super simple, but if my experience is anything like everyone else’s… birth is messy, hard, and painful… and the songs make it sound beautiful and serene… but the reality is much more meaningful in my opinion.  Mary had to work hard to bring the Messiah into the world.  It hurt her, this was a sacrifice, to bear a child who could never fully be hers because He was meant for things so much greater than being a carpenter in Nazareth.  This was, as the Randy Travis song says, a labour of love, and a moment of the miraculous.  The Creator of the Universe entered the world as a squalling child and was held in a young woman’s arms that trembled but held Him tightly.  The hands that would be pinned to a cross flailed in the air as the voice that would commit His Spirit into the Father’s hands now cried out in protest of the cold air on His skin.  God became a man, but more than that, God became a baby.  Utterly dependent on others for life, and if Mary was anything like me, she was terrified at the enormity of the responsibility that she had just taken on.

J: The experience of birth is one of the most beautiful and heart-wrenching things, I think, a guy can go through.  It’s beautiful and exciting because this child that you and your wife have waited for so long is finally almost here, and the two of you is about to become 3.  You’re finally about to meet your child. Yet it is one of the scariest things you can go through because you watch the one you love most in the world after God go through terrible pain and you’re powerless to stop it. Birth is hard physically, mentally, and emotionally for your wife, and when the only things that you can really do is say, “Hey you’re doing a great job” or find other small encouragements as she accomplishes something so incredible, is hard.  For Joseph, that night, maybe he was with Mary moment to moment holding her hand.  Maybe he played catch as Jesus came into this world.  Or perhaps he was somewhere, waiting to hear the news, were mom and baby ok? Leaving it up to others to care for his wife in her time of need. Either way, Joseph, I would think, would have been worried, and afraid, provably felt powerless and yet, so excited and anticipating and just wanting to get back to his now family or soon-to-be family of three. And the moment that he hears, or perhaps is there and witnesses the birth and sees that both mom and baby are ok he will breathe a sigh of relief and also feel immense awe over what has just happened.

Part 5 – the Shepherds

Our final part is the visit of the Shepherds, so two verses describing their visit seemed fitting. Luke 2:16-17 “And they went with haste and found Mary and Joseph, and the baby lying in a manger. And when they saw it, they made known the saying that had been told them concerning this child.”

K: After I had given birth and my baby and I had been given some time to bond and cuddle and we had gotten cleaned up, we were moved to a room and allowed some time to sleep.  Shortly thereafter though, nurses came and went, checking on baby, checking on me, making sure everything was ok and that I was feeding him ok.  It’s very hard to rest with people around, and yet Mary had a cluster of strange men coming to visit her and her newborn.  They came with a wild tale of angels and adulation, directions and discussion, eagerness and excitement.  Their energy must have abounded, for they found what the angel had told them of, but Mary must have been exhausted.  I doubt she could have done any more than watch them through tired eyes as they tiptoed closer to the baby laid to rest in the manger.  Hushed whispers of awe and worship filled the room, and her heart filled with wonder.  Luke says that she treasured these things and pondered them in her heart, which makes me think of the moments of my life that I treasure and return to over and over.  Already, at less than one day old, Jesus was reaching the outcasts of society and touching hearts.  What a wonderful witness to what the rest of His earthly life would be filled with.  What an incredible thing it must have been to hear the story of those who would become the first evangelists as they departed from the baby and rushed to tell everyone they encountered and to see them meet the Saviour of the world who had known them before time.

J: If a bunch of wild-eyed, ecstatic farmers had started pounding on our hospital room door soon after my wife had given birth, I would have called for security and locked that door fast.  It’s hard to know exactly what the setting was for Mary and Joseph, we know there was a manger and there was no room in the inn. Gut that could have looked very different.. IT could have been a place where caravans stayed or a lower room of a house.  Whatever it was, right after the birth of your child the only thing you really want to do is be there with your family and be left alone.  So I’m sure when shepherds came knocking at their door I’m, sure the only thing Joseph wanted to do was say go away bit as he listened to their story and watch them pay homage to the king of kings I’m sure he was filled with wonder.  It can feel surreal when that child you’ve been waiting for finally shows up but I wonder if in that moment it really hit home for Joseph just who this baby was.  And who God had placed in his care.

Ending

J: The story of Jesus’ birth can become a common-place one for us. We read it every Christmas, many of us know it like the back of our hand. Yet as I read it as a husband and new father, I can’t help but connect with the story of Jospeh and Mary in a new way. I see their sacrifice in light of our own story, and realize all the more just what Jospeh and Mary signed up for in saying “yes” to following God’s plan.

Yet, far more importantly, we see the plan of God for redemption unfolding in majestic display of God’s power and glory. Mary could have said no - “no way God! You’re not doing this to me!” Likewise Joseph could have said “Sorry Lord, I’ve got a plan and tis doesn’t work.” Instead, they accepted the call of God to parent the Savior of the world. Through this acceptance, we are pointed to how God cared for them, provided for them, and used them to bring Salvation to this world.

Christmas time is not about gifts, turkey, even so much family or spending time together - although these are all good things. Some of them are quite important too. Ultimately though, Christmas is about Christ; about how God chose to step in a deal with a broken and utterly lost world. Christmas is about how Christ came to die, and save us from sin. When we read about Mary and Jospeh, we should not see some people who are completely unique, and very special - though their choice to have faith is astounding. Rather, we should see a common young couple that said “yes” to God’s plan, and through that faith played a part in God’s story of redemption for humanity.

That same call - to say “yes” to God’s plan - goes out to us as well. No, God probably won’t show up at your door and tell you you’re going to be pregnant with His Son. But when we accept Christ as our Savior and Lord, we enter into the same journey Jospeh and Mary took. A journey to trust God and serve Him. It isn’t promised to be easy, but like Mary and Jospeh, God gives us the chance to be part of Christ’s story - the story of redemption. For we stand, with Jospeh and Mary, and all those who believe, as a testament to the glory of God, and how he chose to intervene and send Christ, to set us free, and make us right with Him. This Christmas, remember the sacrifice of Jesus, and accept the call of God to be part of the story of redemption. And if you have already accept Christ as your Lord and Savior, we encourage you to ask yourself: how can you have faith like Mary and Jospeh.