Stop Trying to Make Your Life Better

Introduction

Has anyone written their new year's resolution yet? Ok, and who has ever written or prepared a new year's resolution list?

There is an universal truth. Everyone hopes the upcoming year will be better than the current year. Come on, who never said: next year I will lose some weight and become more healthy; next year I'll become fluent in Polish; upcoming year I'll strive for a promotion; upcoming year I will get married.

Who is crazy enough to wish on the contrary? Next year I'll try the worst scores in the university; next year I'll do my best to fail all job interviews. No one does such a thing, right?

But why am I saying that? Because that's been the mentality for most people ever since Adam and Even created some trouble in the Garden of Eden. There is this mentality that some people will name as legalism. What does that mean? It means the we live on the basis of the system I call: linear system. What is that?

I like to define it as If A then B system. After sin our mind shifted to this way of thinking. How does that work? Well, just replace B with your goal and A with what you need to achieve your goal. My goal is raise good kids. If I raise my kids upon biblical principles I'll have good grown kids, right?

Some people will go through the performance review of the year. What does that mean? If I solved certain tasks then I will get a promotion. And right now we are in the season of the year where this kind of thinking becomes even more evident.

The popular Santa. How most of current cultures say? Boy and girls, have you behaved well this entire year? Have you got good grades? Then here is your presents. Of course no one believes in Santa, but many times parents do those things to their children. We've been trained on that.

We are always seeking for a better life. We are always setting goals to improve.We are always seeking for new ways and methods to be satisfied. We live in the era of performance. The more you do the right things the more you succeed.

But the question is: Is world any better because of that? Are churches more spiritual because of that? Are people more satisfied and thankful by living by that system?

Today we are going to go through the story of Jesus birth to understand why we should stop trying to make our life better.

Matthew 1:18-25

The New International Version Chapter 1

18 This is how the birth of Jesus the Messiah came about: His mother Mary was pledged to be married to Joseph, but before they came together, she was found to be pregnant through the Holy Spirit.

19 Because Joseph her husband was faithful to the law, and yet did not want to expose her to public disgrace, he had in mind to divorce her quietly.

20 But after he had considered this, an angel of the Lord appeared to him in a dream and said, “Joseph son of David, do not be afraid to take Mary home as your wife, because what is conceived in her is from the Holy Spirit.

21 She will give birth to a son, and you are to give him the name Jesus,  because he will save his people from their sins.”

22 All this took place to fulfill what the Lord had said through the prophet:

23 “The virgin will conceive and give birth to a son, and they will call him Immanuel”  (which means “God with us”).

24 When Joseph woke up, he did what the angel of the Lord had commanded him and took Mary home as his wife.

25 But he did not consummate their marriage until she gave birth to a son. And he gave him the name Jesus.

Guys, probably that is the hundredth sermon you hear on this passage. It's likely that many of you already know this passage by heart and can spot every single detail. But I believe that God also shows his mercy by repeating himself several times so we can rejoice in him.

Matthew starts this passage by saying: – This is how the birth of Jesus the Messiah came about. First thing we learn here is that Mary was pregnant through the Holy Spirit. At this point Mary had already received the Good News. But Joseph was ignorant. The the time comes. Mary is pregnant.

Then Mathew introduces Joseph. Through the life of Joseph we understand why we should stop trying to make our lives better.

I. By Trying to Make Your Life Better You Bring Pressure on Yourself

What is that Renan? How is that related to that story? Matthew will introduce Joseph as someone faithful to the law. What does that mean? You know the Old Testament? There are 613 commandments. It means Joseph was someone who lived according to those laws. Joseph lived by this thing.

So there is something really remarkable about the law, and when I say law here I mean those 613 commandments. If we go to Deuteronomy 29:9

Carefully follow the terms of this covenant, so that you may prosper in everything you do.

Nova Versão Internacional 29.1 A Renovação da Aliança

9 “Sigam fielmente os termos desta aliança, para que vocês prosperem em tudo o que fizerem.

The New International Version Chapter 29

9 Carefully follow the terms of this covenant, so that you may prosper in everything you do.

Joseph as someone really faithful in the law grew up listening to it. Remember the system? If A then B? If I do this I will get that. Then what happens to him? He brought a lot of pressure on himself. Joseph as everyone here tonight wanted to proper. But in order to prosper he needed to do the right thing.

Then if Joseph lived was here Today he would believe like following:

if you want good children, teach them the bible

If you want a good marriage then follow Biblical principles

If you want God to bless your ministry, live according to Christian leadership principles

If you want close friends, learn to accept your-self, be vulnerable, and forgiving

That was the way Joseph would me it work today.

But the problem is that it bring pressure. Because we are living by requirements; we are living by a list of to-dos. That brings pressure; pressure brings slavery, slavery to make your life better somehow. If someone chooses to live like that they will end up frustrated by one of the two reasons:

It's guaranteed that at any moment we are going to fail that system somehow. The more we fail the more we convince ourselves that it didn't work. How many times people tried to quit an addiction. He tries many ways just to fail in the end. Maybe you worked hard this year to get a promotion, but in the end it didn't come. Then you start realising that it does not depend on your efforts only.

But then you say: Renan! I don't get anything wrong. I always do the right thing. Some men will call those people wives, right? But the thing here is that even if you do everything right. Things may still not happen the way you expected. Guess what? Frustration.

Why? You are living by pressure. You are just living to make your life better. And you know what is dangerous? Whenever it works. Because we will think we are taking the antidote to our sickness. It's like the painkiller. It will fight the symptoms but not the real issue. You have COVID, then you take Ibuprofen. Fever goes away; pain goes away; headache goes away. Then you think. See? My life is better. It works!

II. By Trying to Make Your Life Better You Become Slave of The Good Life

In that occasion Joseph had two options: (1) Request a publicly divorce of Mary; (2) Leave Mary in secret to preserve her from public humiliation, or in the worst case death penalty.

Joseph not only was pressured. He was leading a life slaved by the good life. The mindset was: the only viable option is to leave Mary. I just need to decide how. But if I don't do that, prosperity will not come. See? If A then B system. Trying to make the life better.

Guys, imagine that young man laying his head on the pillow. God, I've worked so hard to pay for this marriage. I paid the dowry. The contract is all set. We just waiting for the day to come. Now that happens?

Joseph is slave of his own will. He is slave of the life he thought would be better. I will be satisfied just if I leave Mary; I will prosper just if I do that. Because those were the goals he set for him. The problem with trying to make our life better is that we will always seek what is best for us according to our will. And it must happen at our own pace. I want my son to convert Lord! I want to get married Lord! If possible next year. We set goals according to the needs we think we have.

What is Joseph thinking when he decides to leave Mary? Man, if I don't divorce, I will be cursed. But then something extraordinary happens. Joseph falls asleep. And God speaks to him through the Angel. Joseph, Son of David! do not be afraid to take Mary as your wife. In other words: Joseph stop trying to make your life better.

Then comes this part. I love it. He comes to Joseph and says: What is conceived in her is from the Holy Spirit. Now look at it: She will give birth to a son (Again: forget about if A then B) . Wait for it: You are going to give him the name Jesus. Stop here.

What does the name Jesus mean? You know that in the judaic culture the name of a person meant a lot regarding their destiny. It was not only a matter of identifying someone. It was a matter of the purpose of that person. God says through the angel: You are going give him the name Jesus. Again, what does the name Jesus mean? "God save" or ""JAWEH saves." Now think through with me.

Imagine the angel said only that: You are going to give him the name Jesus. What do you think Joseph would understand? God saves? Let's replace the word save with "God solves problems". What do you think Joseph would've think? Aha! God is saving my marriage; God is saving Mary's reputation. I don't know how but this boy will solve the issues I'm going to have to face people's judgement; maybe he will help me to profit more with my job.

Why? Because the mentality is: If I do I will get it. If I do God will make my life better. Why? Because blessings from God becomes an idol when we live that way.

Imagine you taking your kids to meet Santa at the mall. What do you think this child is going to choose when he sees the Santa and the pile of presents? Do you think he is going to say: "Mom, leave the presents, I wanna take Santa home with us!".

Why am I saying this? Because many times we prefer the blessings over the blesser.

But then you ask: But Renan. What are you talking about? It means it's wrong to pray for someone to be saved? It depends. Back in the days someone said: "Please, pray for my mother in law to be saved. I believe if she is saved my life and my wife's life is going to be 90% better". He just wanted the blessing. Not the blesser.

But then God says: "Because he is going to save his people from their sins". In other words: Joseph! You are going to give him the name Jesus because he will not come to be your Ibuprofen but to be the Vaccine.

The problem of trying to make your life better is that we are going to end up distorting the purpose Jesus came. God is already giving you the best present, that is himself, and we are longing for more things. Blessing is not the problem; the problem is when blessing comes first.

Do you know the way we think? If I was not here my life would be better. If my wife behaved like that, my life would be so much better. Man, God is giving you his best present. Jesus came so we could be in God's presence.

III. By Trying to Make Your Life Better You Miss God's Presence

When Joseph encounters with God his mentality gets changed. His life got changed, but he challenges remained. The you may ask: Renan, if his life would still be difficult, why didn't he refused. He didn't refuse for the same reason David says in Psalms 27:4. Look What David says: One thing I ask the Lord. This only do I seek. that I may dwell in the house of the Lord all the days of my life.

Who was David? King of the main nation at that time. Probably the most powerful man of his time; rich; skilled at battles and music; good looking; he had loyal friends; he lived in a palace. He comes to the Lord and says: I have it all. But the only thing that make sense of those things is your presence.

Man, you will not get fully satisfied when get a new car; you will not get totally satisfied when you fix your marriage; you will fulfilled just when you have an encounter with him and when his presence become the most important thing to you. Maybe the pain you're going through is the way God is using to teach that his presence is enough.

Cara, maybe you leave this service Today and the circumstances will not change. But you will be changed. Because God's presence is the same as constant joy. You rejoice in his grace when you fail; you rejoice in his mercy when he blesses you you rejoice in his love when you get rejected.

The solution for your problem is not fixing your neighbour. The solution is you seeking God's presence above anything else.

IV. How Does People Who Seek's God's Presence live?

But Renan. How does these people live? Let me tell how. Their life; their decisions; their lifestyle are all driven by God's presence in their lives. Do you wanna know what happened to Joseph next? He took Mary as his wife. Now let me ask you. Were the circumstances changed? He was still to raise a children that was not of him at least biologically; he could not have intimacy with his wife because of Jesus; it's very likely he would have to be challenged with other people's judgement on his situation.

Circumstances didn't change. God could have changed? Of course he could! Then there are three passages Joseph will appear in the Scriptures. All of them involves trials. First, Herodes wanted to kill the boy then he needed to move to Egypt; Second, the years roll by and God reveals the Herodes had died, but his son was ruling in his place. Then God tells Joseph: Head to Nazareth. Cara, God was bringing the Savior to a small town instead of Jerusalem.

Why? Because he understood the same thing as David. I want to dwell in God's place! I want to seek his presence. That's the reason. But then you might ask: Renan! But then you are saying the Christianity is only suffering? No! I am saying that Christianity is GOd's constant presence in your life. Let put in order words. That is experience joy in the midst of suffering; that is experience peace in the midst of warfare; that is to be favoured when you did something wrong; that is to be blessed when you deserved to be cursed.

But we are changing the presence for a pile of presents. After an encounter with God, Joseph didn't care about the circumstances. My reputation? My marriage? My comfort? How can those things be compared to your presence?

What happens when we experience his presence? Jesus becomes our priority. We start living through God's provision. We settle down because we know he has the best present.

We are then left with two decisions tonight.

Abandon God. What good is He when life falls apart? We can say deep inside. God what did I do wrong for that to happen to me? Or maybe you are telling yourself: I planned every single step. I did everything accordingly. Do you remember the old son in the prodigal son parable? Where is my calf? I stayed here all those years for nothing. Maybe you're pressing God against the wall. Why? Because you are broken. You are living by making your life better. Pressure is on you right now. You are trying to figure out which decision to make. Should I go to that place? Should I end this marriage? Should I quit that job? I did all I could but I'm unsure I can keep that position. Am I being a bad mother or father? My child does not listen to me. I did everything right. Where did I do wrong? You are still waiting for the best God can offer, but he has already come and you are missing it. Then you think: Therapy will make my life better. Then you realize the it improves, but you still feel something is missing. Then you say: I need more friends! Then you have many friends and you still feel alone; Then you get into addictions and you realize that thing is just breaking you more and more day by day. Then you come to the conclusion. This God is not my thing. I'm still hurting. He is out of ibuprofen.

Abandon yourself to God. You humble yourself. You say: Lord I am tired of trying to do the right thing. From now on it's not my will anymore. My marriage is falling apart; my kids doesn't listen to me; I'm not sure if I can keep my job. Lord I pass the controller of my life to you because I know the through those things you are working through me. And I know the more I experience your presence, the more I'm attracted to you, the more I'll be like you; the more I'll speak like you. For when I am weak, then I am strong. If I only for this life we have hope in Christ, we are of all people most to be pitted.

You decide tonight. Christmas is Immanuel. Christmas is God's presence.