Preparing to Say 'No'

Have you ever made a choice that turned out badly, which you could’ve avoided by taking good advice more seriously, doing more research, or thinking more clearly beforehand?

The Old Testament book of Proverbs gives some excellent and wise advice about this life experience – not once but twice – when it says, “A prudent [sensible] man foresees evil and hides himself, but the simple [naïve] pass on [keep going] and are punished [end up with excessive fines or intense grief and sorrow].” (Prov 22:3; 27:12).

This wise saying gives the heartbeat of what Peter says in 1 Pet 4:1-6 for both Proverbs and Peter encourage any follower of Christ to prepare intentionally and responsibly today for the challenges he or she will face in the future.

If we are wise, then we will take this advice seriously and by doing so, we will avoid both the temptations of ungodly behavior and the ridicule of nonbelievers which will surely come our way as we follow Christ.

Will you succumb to inward sinful desires and the pressure of nonbelievers around you, or will you follow Christ triumphantly through the temptations and ridicule that you will inevitable face?

Consider Peter himself, who wrote these words at a much later, more experienced and mature stage of life in following Christ. Before Christ endured the horrible injustices and excruciating pains of crucifixion, Peter naïvely promised that he would follow Christ into anything, even imprisonment or death (Lk 22:31-34).

Christ disagreed, telling Peter that Satan would tempt him strongly and he would deny his relationship with Christ three times. If Peter had not responded to Christ’s warning so arrogantly and self-confidently, perhaps he would have avoided denying the Lord?

So, here Peter looks back after decades of being forgiven and restored by Christ and of serving Christ faithfully and suffering for him. From this vantage point of greater spiritual experience and maturity, he warns other believers like you and me not to be arrogant and self-confident as he once had been. We would be wise to listen to his advice, esp. those of us who are new and less experienced in our relationship with Christ.

We should mentally prepare to suffer as Christ himself prepared.

As followers of Christ, we’ve been placed into the greatest race on the planet, a marathon of faith and spiritual endurance. This grueling but rewarding marathon begins when we believe on Christ as God and Savior and gets serious when we declare our faith openly through baptism. Then it continues day-by-day as we study God’s Word in private and obey God’s Word in public before a watching and antagonistic world.

Thankfully, Christ has not only called us to follow him, but he has blazed the trail before us. As Peter explained in the previous section of this letter, Christ has provided us with an example to pattern our lives after so that we can follow in his steps. Christ as also succeeded and triumphed before us, showing us that following him is not only noble, it is triumphant and victorious, too. Long-term, everlasting victory is assured if we follow him.

Therefore, since Christ suffered for us in the flesh, arm yourselves also with the same mind,

Because Christ has provided us with a successful and triumphant example, we should prepare for our own suffering as he himself did.

First of all, we should not only do this because it is good to do and effective to do, we should do this as an act of deep appreciation for Christ. Because he suffered “for us” we should be fully prepared to suffer for him in return. Though our suffering will not rescue him as his suffering rescued us from our sins, for he needs no rescuing, it will certainly return to him the honor, glory, and respect which he deserves.

Furthermore, Christ suffered for us “in the flesh,” meaning that he experienced the kind of pain and suffering that we ourselves experience having a human, physical body. This was not something that Christ experienced by nature since God does not exist as a created, finite, physical being. Yet to rescue us from our sins, he willingly became a human being and accepted all the pain and suffering that being a physical being includes.

Knowing this, we should arm ourselves “with the same mind,” which means that we should prepare for the temptations and trials that await us the same way that he prepared himself for the temptations, ridicule, and suffering which awaited him.

The word mind here refers to a person’s intentional thoughts, those thoughts which a person choose to think. This differs from other kinds of thoughts, which are those thoughts which simply “pop into our heads” or are fueled and shaped by our inward desires, fears, and feelings or the external circumstances, people, and pressures. Rather than let the thoughts which happen to us guide our lives and form our responses to future suffering, we should deliberately and intentionally choose to focus and think instead on what is true.

Luke 9:51 tells us that there was a point in Christ’s earthly ministry that he “locked in” mentally, as it were, and focused intentionally on the task ahead, going to Jerusalem to die on the cross for our sins. “When the time had come for him to be received up, he steadfastly set his face to go to Jerusalem.” “Steadfastly set his face” means “to decide firmly, to resolve, to make up one’s mind definitively.”

By focusing himself mentally on this goal, he prepared to persevere through whatever challenges or potential roadblocks would stand in his way. Even the appeals of his own disciples to turn back would not persuade him otherwise. Early in this journey to Jerusalem, Christ clearly taught that he expected anyone who followed him to adopt the same mental focus. “No one, having put his hand to the plow, and looking back, is fit for the kingdom of God,” he said (Luke 9:62).

“Arm yourselves.” This is a military term that describes the way a Roman soldier would prepare for battle. It describes a soldier putting on a full suit of armor, preparing his weapons, and knowing his battleplans well.

Professional athletes are notorious for their pregame rituals.

Before soccer matches, Cesc Fabregas, a Chelsea and Spain midfielder, kissed four times a ring which his wife had given to him.

Wayne Rooney ate Coco Pops before every match.

Neymar chatted and prayed with his father by phone before every game.

While these rituals are generally more superstitious than effective, actual preparation occurs in pregame routines – strategy sessions, stretches, warm-ups, and so on. In fact, the success of professional athletes truly begins months and years before the game as they commit to physical training routines, special diets, and countless hours of practice.

Does this describe your approach to following Christ? Far too many believers believe on Christ, perhaps declare their faith openly through baptism, then coast on cruise control. They’re like a professional athlete who stops practicing and preparing well once they’ve signed a lucrative contract since they now feel secure.

We should not let such an arrogant and naïve approach creep into our lives once we’ve turned to Christ for salvation. Because he has suffered for us, we should mentally prepare ourselves to suffer for him.

We prepare by saying ‘no’ to sin before we’re tempted.

For he who has suffered in the flesh has ceased from sin, that he no longer should live the rest of his time in the flesh for the lusts of men, but for the will of God.

Resisting the urge to sin is not a casual exercise. It is a serious choice that requires some degree of suffering and predetermination. By ‘predetermination,’ I mean mental preparation – deciding beforehand what you will and will not do.

To “cease from sin” does not describe someone who has achieved sinless perfection. Some well-meaning believers teach that it is possible to become a sinless person, a person who never sins in thought, word, or deed. Such perfection is not attainable in this life but will be achieved in full once we’ve died and received our resurrected, spiritual bodies with no sinful tendencies or desires.

To “cease from sin,” instead, describes a personal, deliberate choice to say ‘no’ to certain temptations before they occur, temptations which may have formerly controlled you before you believed on Christ. The children’s song, “O Be Careful Little Eyes What You See,” describes well this type of personal resolve.

Such a person is a person who has first believed on Christ as God and Savior and then decides to make the “will of God” his governing principle of life. Before a person believes on Christ, he or she lives by “the lusts of men,” which refers to the base, sinful desires which dominate and control our lives before Christ saves us.

“All that is in the world—the lust of the flesh, the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life—is not of the Father but is of the world.” (1 Jn 2:16)

The lust of the flesh is those desires which seek to satisfy misplaced and twisted desires which are contrary to God’s design and purpose for your life

The lust of the flesh is those desires to have and experience things which are outside of God’s design and purpose for your life

The pride of life any desire to be something more or different than what God has designed you or intended for you to become

Knowing what these “lusts of men” are, then we should also ask, “What is the will of God?”

One way of answering this question is to point out that the entire Bible, in one way or another, expresses God’s desires and purposes for your life. For this reason, every follower of Christ should commit him- or herself to participating in private study, small-group study, and church-wide teaching of the Word of God out of a desire to know God’s design and purpose for your life as accurately and thoroughly as possible.

Another way of answering this question – though this is definitely a partial and minimal answer – is to search the Bible for the phrase “this is the will of God,” since this will at least give us some concrete and specific statements to get us started. Here are the three times this statement occurs in Scripture:

1 Thess 4:3, “This is the will of God, your sanctification: that you should abstain from sexual immorality.”

1 Thess 5:18, “In everything give thanks, for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you.”

1 Pet 2:15, “For this is the will of God [obeying civil, governmental authorities], that by doing good you may put to silence the ignorance of foolish men [who falsely accuse you].”

So, today – before any further temptations to sin come your way – if you are a follower of Christ by faith, then you should decide to make a clean break with the sinful temptations which easily pull you down.

Decide before you’re tempted and make proactive choices to avoid those temptations before they happen. Don’t wait until they happen, be surprised when they occur, and only then consider saying ‘no,’ for such a late and unprepared approach fails far more frequently than it succeeds.

We have no good reason to repeat past sins.

For we have spent enough of our past lifetime in doing the will of the Gentiles—when we walked in lewdness, lusts, drunkenness, revelries, drinking parties, and abominable idolatries.

With these words, Peter says something that sounds somewhat sarcastic. In effect, he is saying, “You’ve sinned enough, why would you want to sin anymore?”

By “walked,” he refers not to occasional, one-off choices but to regular, repeated patterns of living. He refers to a kind of culture and lifestyle which regularly does these things. What are the sort of things which nonbelievers frequently and habitually do?

Lewdness: unbridled, unrestrained law-breaking and sensual pleasures

Lusts: indulging (rather than restraining) sinful passions and desires

Drunkenness: intoxication and hallucination (either alcohol, narcotics, or illicit drugs)

Revelries: carousing, wild parties, orgies, major public disturbances

Drinking Parties: events planned for the purpose of getting drunk

Abominable Idolatries: idol worship events, esp. which involved sensual indulgence

Peter states quite clearly that believers have no good reason at all to participate in any of these types of behaviors any more. As John MacArthur observes:

When pursuing such a path in their former lives, the apostle’s audience had indulged in a sufficient amount of such despicable sins and they were never to return to them. The memory of the pain and misery those deeds caused them was to motivate his readers to diligently avoid such behavior, especially since their new life goal was to enter the holy place where sin would forever cease.

Have you decisively, deliberately chosen to abandon and refrain from this type of behavior as a follower of Christ? When opportunities to do these things present themselves to you or when nonbelievers (or perhaps even misled believers) invite you to join them in doing these things, are you fully prepared to say ‘no’? If so – and if you have already experienced saying ‘no’ to such things, what should you also be prepared to experience?

Saying ‘no’ will bring an antagonistic response from nonbelievers.

In regard to these, they think it strange that you do not run with them in the same flood of dissipation, speaking evil of you.

The people who are doing these things will “think it strange” that you will not participate with them in their sinful activities. This means that they will act or speak as though they are “astonished,” “shocked,” or “surprised” that you won’t participate.

“Think it strange” has an additional layer of meaning as well, which is that nonbelievers may also feel hurt, offended, or resentful that you will not participate with them in their sinful behavior.

A Lutheran or Catholic family member, for instance, may feel hurt that you will not participate in or support a religious ceremony such as the infant baptism of your brother’s child.

Your boss may feel offended that you will not participate in the annual staff Christmas party because it features drunkenness, dancing, and so on.

Your date or fiancé may resent you because you will no longer do those things which you know are reserved for a married couple.

The list goes on. Though we should never needlessly hurt or offend another person, esp. a nonbeliever whom we desire to love and influence for Christ, we should be fully prepared to accept the accusation of offending them if the offense comes because we refuse to participate in sinful behavior – those same behaviors which you participated in freely and frequently before you believed on Christ.

“Flood of dissipation” refers to mindless behavior, the way that nonbelievers mindlessly give way to gratifying their sinful desires and going what everyone else around them does. This mindless behavior stands in contrast to the way that believers are supposed to live mindfully, making deliberate, focused decisions which are based upon the principles and truth of God’s Word, not the desires of their flesh and of the people around them.

By living differently and in a contrary manner, we will not only surprise and offend the nonbelievers in our lives, we will discover that they will say “evil things” about us.

Peter’s description refers to words that blaspheme (that’s the Greek word), which means something like “to malign, slander, or defame.” Rather than respect our differences, no matter how lovingly, nicely, and politely we may speak of and live them out, nonbelievers will accuse us of being hypocritical, inconsiderate, and rude. They may even accuse us of outright crimes and sins, just as they accused Christ of insurrection and treason against the Roman government and doctrinal heresy and lawless teaching.

Commentator Edmund Clowney offers these related thoughts:

Drawing the line in a new life will antagonize former friends. They will find our new behavior bizarre, even threatening. Charles Colson had gained notoriety in the Watergate scandal as a close associate of President Richard Nixon. When he was converted in the midst of the Watergate proceedings, the press greeted his ‘born-again’ witness with hoots of derision. Cartoonists had a field day picturing a cover-up by this instant saint. With the passing years, however, Colson’s genuineness in caring for prisoners made its mark. The cynical laughter died down, and Colson’s conversion began to command respect. Something had happened in his life.

Though nonbelievers may act surprised when we no longer participate with or endorse their sinful behaviors, we should not be surprised when they wrongly accuse us if we do. To faithfully follow Christ, we have to accept beforehand that the world will neither accept our new lifestyle or like having us around. Are you okay with that? Are you prepared for that? If not, then you’re not ready to suffer for Christ.

The ultimate test of our faith occurs after we die.

Here Peter wraps up this small section of instruction by assuring believers that death is nothing to be afraid of. In those days, nonbelievers would question and even mock believers for what seemed to be a futile, pointless lifestyle. Believers would abstain from sinful behaviors only to die and get nothing for their efforts. What fun or good was that?

They will give an account to Him who is ready to judge the living and the dead.

Peter reminds us that though nonbelievers appear to be having the most freedom and fun in this life, they will answer for their sinful lifestyles after they die. Though they may not understand, the most significant stage of their life is not the one they’re living in now, the one they (and we) can see, touch, hear, taste, and smell. It is the life to come. For them, death is not a release from reality but an entrance into the rest of reality forever. After they die, they will stand before Christ who will judge them as guilty for their sins.

For this reason the gospel was preached also to those who are dead, that they might be judged according to men in the flesh, but live according to God in the spirit.

With this statement, Peter is not describing some event by which the gospel was or is being preached to dead people, nor is he offering the possibility that people who’ve died may still hear the gospel and be saved after they’ve died. (Roman Catholics sometimes refer to this verse as a support for the unbiblical concept of purgatory.)

Instead, Peter is explaining the triumphant outcome of believers who have already died. If a believer lives and suffers for Christ, then dies, he or she has not failed miserably. Instead, just as Christ died in his fleshly body but resurrected with a spiritual, glorified body freed from the effects of temptation and suffering, so deceased believers enjoy the same result. Though nonbelievers view our deaths as reason to mock our new lifestyle, we view our deaths as the door to our ultimate freedom and reward.

We must arm ourselves with this confident outlook at the prospect of death so that we are prepared to endure when temptations to sin come our way and when nonbelievers are offended and falsely accuse or mistreat us.

We must prepare today to resist the siren songs of this unbelieving world tomorrow.

In his ancient, classic literature, we read about many characters from the imaginary world of Greek mythology. One of these mythological characters are the Sirens. Though sirens have somehow become affiliated with mermaids today, these were originally portrayed as creatures which had the head of a woman and the body of a bird with scaly claws.

These creatures inhabited a rocky island called Anthemoessa, “a flowery island,” and where they perched upon a grassy mountaintop littered with human bones. These bones, of course, could not be seen from the water below.

As weary, sea-worn sailors passed by on ships, these Sirens sang beautiful, irresistible songs which lured sailors towards the island. Once there, ships would crash against the rocks below the water’s edge and the Sirens would swoop down to devour them.

In the story called Argonautica, Jason – the captain of that voyage – prepared for the songs of the Sirens by adding the famed and skilled musician, Orpheus, to his crew. As they approached the island of Anthemoessa, he ordered Orpheus to play his lyre and sing loudly until their ship had successfully passed by the island. According to this legend, Orpheus played so loudly and beautifully that the Siren songs could not succeed.

In another story called Odyssey, Homer told of a captain named Odysseus who employed a much different plan to overcome the songs of the Sirens. Like Jason’s plan, this plan also required some deliberate and mental preparation. Before they approached the island, he instructed his crew to tie his hands and feet tightly to the ship’s mast. Once done, he ordered the entire crew to close their ears completely with wax so they could hear no sound. No matter how greatly he struggled or seemed to shout for them to release him from his bonds, he instructed them in advance not to respond to his appeals. Only after they had successfully sailed beyond the sound of the Siren songs were they permitted to remove the wax from their ears and let him go.

Like Jason and Odysseus, we must prepare ourselves mentally in advance to say ‘no’ to the temptations of the sinful world around us and our own, former sinful desires. We must also be prepared to accept that nonbelievers will be offended by our rejection of their invitations to sin and will even falsely accuse or mistreat us. Even the prospect of death itself should not be able to change our minds. Just as Christ himself determined to suffer for us, we must determine that we will be ready to suffer for him if called upon to do so.

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