Grief and Beleif

Introduction

Have you ever been apart of something that made you feel like you were apart of something much bigger or part of your community? These events make you feel like you belong. I know we are past the Christmas season, but my mind automatically went to Christmas parades. I’ve participated in the Warner Robins Christmas parade three times, sort of strange now. One time I was marching a part of Civil Air Patrol carrying a flag the whole way. Another time I was sitting in the back of a trailer playing a trumpet with my school band. Another time I was in a float as a part of Oakland’s live nativity they had in the parade.

Each time it felt as though I was a part of this community, it felt good to be united around the celebration of the Christmas season. A more recent time was when I in downtown Macon for the national day of prayer. One of my students who participates in the praise team at school was selected to say some words. It felt nice to feel a part of the community and feel united around prayer for our nation and local government and institutions. It felt as though we were united around God for the betterment of our society.

When I went to the Southern Baptist Convention in 2021, I think, when it was in Nashville, I got a real glimpse of the immensity of the SBC and grew in appreciation of being a part of something so great. The convention center we met in was enormous, and so was the amount of people meeting together and debating and voting on policy and so forth. But I also remember the people outside on the streets preaching to us and telling us we were going to hell for being a part of the SBC.

The ancient city of Thessalonica had events which brought the people together as a community. Their community though was united around Caesar. Whenever Caesar would go to visit a city, the high up dignitaries and citizens would go out to meet him and welcome him into the city, almost like a parade in honor of the Caesar who made them a free city and bestowed on them other such honors for being so loyal to Rome. Some cities would repave their roads to make them straight for the visit of the Caesar. No amount of groveling was too low to honor their emperor. “Caesar is Lord,” is what they would say. Emperor worship was commonly used as a means to unify the empire.

Christians, however, saw through the propaganda and recognized the injustice that reigned in the empire. Jesus himself taught Mark 10:42-45 “And Jesus called them to him and said to them, “You know that those who are considered rulers of the Gentiles lord it over them, and their great ones exercise authority over them. But it shall not be so among you. But whoever would be great among you must be your servant, and whoever would be first among you must be slave of all. For even the Son of Man came not to be served but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many.””

The Christians lived for the hope of another king that would come to visit them, and that was king Jesus. And because of this, they were seen like those people in the street outside the SBC screaming at us that we were going to hell. Not that they were actively on the streets picketing or anything; however, not participating in the guilds, the parades, the accepted injustice, the accepted social order, and telling people about king Jesus is noticed very quickly. The Christian movement became a thorn in the side of the Roman empire very quickly and the local rulers of Thessalonica recognized them as a problem as well.

Many in this Christian community were dying, perhaps as a result of the persecution. And this led to a big problem in the mind of the Christians who remained: what will happen to them when Jesus returns? Will they be able to participate in this welcoming parade? Will they be going to heaven as well? What is their fate? Paul seeks to answer that question in our text.

The Fate of the Sleepers

1 Thess. 4:13-15 “But we do not want you to be uninformed, brothers, about those who are asleep, that you may not grieve as others do who have no hope. For since we believe that Jesus died and rose again, even so, through Jesus, God will bring with him those who have fallen asleep. For this we declare to you by a word from the Lord, that we who are alive, who are left until the coming of the Lord, will not precede those who have fallen asleep.”

Context

Paul transitions from the previous text about brotherly love. And this completes the three major themes of 1 Thessalonians. Paul proclaims the need for holiness in 1 Thess. 4:1-8. And many of you know that when you attempt to live a life devoted to God in holiness that you face opposition. Opposition from the world, the flesh, and the devil. How do we face our opposers who are in our community trying to get us to fit in? Do we shout, get angry, type out rude things on social media? No, Paul says we are to respond in love and taking responsibility for ourselves in 1 Thess. 4:9-12.

And why is this our response? What motivates us to live holy and respond to opposition with love? And this is crucial, because if we get this wrong we will burn out quickly. Our motivation is Christ, his death, resurrection, and return.

Explication v. 13

Paul makes a stronger transition by saying, “We do not want you to be uninformed, brothers.” So we know that he is addressing a new topic. It is also true that he is responding to a concern that this church had expressed to him either through a letter or orally though Timothy’s account. He addresses “those who are asleep” which is a euphemism for those who have passed away, for those who have died.

Paul exhorts them not to grieve as those who have no hope. I think it’s significant that he does not say, “don’t grieve. Period.” Paul allows for grieving, but grieving of a different kind.

Application v. 13

And I think it’s important to take some time and meditate on this for a moment. I was looking up the American Psychological Associations for suggestions in how to deal with loss and how to grieve. Now, Paul tells us strictly not to grieve like those without hope. And if we know anything about the institution of the APA, they represent those who have no hope.

They suggest to identify the the loss, identify the emotions being felt (guilt, sorrow, yearning, etc.), and encourage people to express their emotion. And though all of this sounds nice and pretty, there’s no hope here. Modern psychology offers as much hope as the roses on the casket: it looks nice, smells nice, but there’s no real solution there, the dead person is still in the casket. (As dead as the roses will be the next week).

And I speak from experience. I grew up in the nineties when the psychologists were saying the best thing young people need to succeed is self-esteem (they’ve now renounced this, by the way). I remember after my parents divorce, I went through grief counseling at my school and recognized as a first grader that it was pointless. I remember telling my friend who asked how it went, “I just talked about my feelings.” It didn’t solve the problems, my family was still broken. It didn’t define sin or identify any sin in my heart and offer a solution.

I remember when my grandmother died when I was in 10th grade. My grandmother was the one who discipled me and had me memorize Bible verse, I was very close to her. When I was first told she was not going to recover, I remember how it felt. I knew I was going to sob, but I didn’t want to sob in front of her, so I got in my car and drove away. No amount of psychoanalysis or discussing my emotions was going to stop her death. There’s no hope there.

What gives me hope in the midst of loss is that I know that God reigns on his throne and he promises to work all things according for our good. And I know that I often become far too abrasive to belabor a point, so let me try to be more clear. I don’t think that all psychology and counseling is fruitless or pointless. But I do know that when we try to ground our hope in something other than Jesus then it is a false hope.

And Paul’s point is clear, we are not to grieve as those without hope. Which I hope reiterates the fact that we are not Christian just because we go to church, but every life experience and attitude and emotion should in some way involve Jesus.

Explication v. 14

In verse 14, Paul gives the basis of the hope, “For since we believe that.” This phrase, “we believe that” is the formation of a creedal statement, probably formed prior to Paul. The content of the creedal statement is “Jesus died and rose again.” Which forms the very foundation of Christian teaching and dogma. Jesus died, to we grieve that death? We may remorse our sin and feel terrible about the cruelty of the death, but to we grieve the death itself? No, because of the resurrection. Jesus rose again, death could not defeat him, it had no power over him.

Paul says, “through Jesus, God will bring with him those who have fallen asleep” The phrase with him is referencing with Jesus. That is, God will bring those who have died to be risen again as well through Jesus. “Through Jesus” is also emphasized throughout the passage as those who have a relationship with Jesus at the time of their death. There is no room here for any type of universalism or post-mortem salvation.

Paul goes on in verse 15 to add certainty to his words by saying they are from the Lord. He makes the statement that those who are left alive will not precede those who are dead> Precede them in what? Well in the great meeting in the clouds, to Christ’s heavenly triumphant entry.

The Thessalonians believers were concerned that death might be the thing that separated them from their community. They had placed their hope in being alive rather than Jesus. And hoping to be alive is not the best motivator for love, faithfulness, and holiness. In fact, placing one’s hope in being alive might motivate less holiness so you do stand out a lot to be put to death.

Application

I want you to take some time and ask yourself, what motivates your holiness? What motivates your love?

When we grieve we should examine what we believe

The Thessalonians have their hope in being alive at Christ’s return which could motivate love and holiness, but also motivates self-preservation. “I will only love so much;” or, “I will only be so holy.” Furthermore, it causes them to see their dead as a lost cause. Paul writes to correct this mentality. Our everlasting hope which motivates us is in Jesus, his death and resurrection. In him we have the forgiveness of sins, in him we have life evermore, in him we have fellowship with God, in him we have holiness and love, in him we have the fulness of life and belonging.

So Paul says we have hope (v. 13), and our hope is in Christ (v. 15), and this hope motivates a different lifestyle and grief.

Grief is good and God sometimes allows it in our life for our good. Grief operates sort of like a home inspector. You know when you want to buy a new home it’s good to get it inspected. I’ve had the pleasure going around with the home inspector the past two times that I’ve bought a home.

The last time we bought a home it was previously foreclosed. Going around with the home inspector I pointed out what I thought were the worst problems. There was a crack in the sheet rock in our bathroom. There was a crack in the brick fireplace. And there was a crack in the ceiling in the garage.

Of course I was worried the whole time that it was the foundation. And if that were the case, we were not going to buy the house because it would cost us so much money to fix the foundation. The home inspector, however, went down under the house and assured me there was nothing wrong with the foundation. He theorized it was the fact that there was three layers of shingles on the roof (which ended up leaking in seven places and had to be replaced).

Grief is like a home inspector. It tells us if the foundation of our hope is bad. 2 Kings 18:21 “Behold, you are trusting now in Egypt, that broken reed of a staff, which will pierce the hand of any man who leans on it. Such is Pharaoh king of Egypt to all who trust in him.” The terrible Rabshakeh announces to the people of Judah to convince them to stop trusting in Egypt. But this is how idols work as well, we trust and lean on them and them they end up harming us in return.

In one of Aesoph’s fables a farmer is walking through hid field on a cold morning and notices a viper cold stiff on the ground. He has compassion on the viper and decides to pick it up and put it in his pocket to warm it up. After a while the viper is able to move again and bites the farmer. The farmer eventually dies.

What do we put our hope in? Is it Jesus or is it a false hope which is really no hope at all? The false hope will eventually come back and bite us. And sometimes we can be so deceived that we think we are hoping in something good. The Thessalonians hoped in being alive at Christ’s return, isn’t that good?

But grief came and tested their hope. Grief found the hope was not in the death and resurrection of Jesus, where it should have been all along.

So how do people grieve who have no hope? When the grief goes to find the foundation of hope it finds none and the life begins to fall apart. People usually respond then in two ways: overly express the grief in hope for some sort of catharsis or numb the grief with avoidance and entertainment.

In one episode of Perry Mason he gets involved in a government scandal. Some government official had a hospital built to get political favor. But he conspired with his contractor and cut a lot of corners to line his pockets. He had the building inspector paid off so that nothing would come out. Everything is going well until the hospital collapses killing several patients and staff inside.

This can be the same thing that happens when we pay off or avoid our grief.

Whenever we grieve, we should examine what we believe.

And Paul makes this clear when he says, “we should not grieve as those without hope, for we believe. . .”

Sometimes when we grieve it’s not over loss of life.

A lot of my life right now consists of juggling a bunch of responsibilities: Christian, husband, father, youth pastor, janitor, teacher, coach, seminary student. Sometimes I feel like I’m playing the game where you bop moles on the head. Every time I feel that I’m doing good in one area, I find that I’m not doing good in another.

Sometimes I want to give up seminary, it’s time consuming and costly. My wife gently reminds me that I’m not doing it for myself but to better serve and minister to others; so, I keep on.

Sometimes I want to give up one of my jobs, but I know I would not be able to provide sufficiently for my family; and with the rising inflation it seems as though I have to take on more jobs.

There has been one common theme every time I get in one of these self-deceptive and self-deprecating moods: I’ve lost sight of my hope in Jesus.

We can place our hope in a number of things. I want take responsibility and do it all well; but if that’s what I place my hope in then I will become self focused and focus more on where I fail. And when I focus on where I fail I become stunned and unmotivated to continue in my responsibility. The false hope becomes no hope at all and bites me in the end.

But almost always when I’m in the middle of this grief, I examine what I believe. And every single time I have to credit this self-examination to the Holy Spirit. Because if it were up to me, I would continue my pity party until I die. But the Spirit brings my attention time and time again to Jesus.

So I hope that whenever you grieve, you examine what you believe, and this is what Paul says we believe:

1 Thess. 4:15-18 “For this we declare to you by a word from the Lord, that we who are alive, who are left until the coming of the Lord, will not precede those who have fallen asleep. For the Lord himself will descend from heaven with a cry of command, with the voice of an archangel, and with the sound of the trumpet of God. And the dead in Christ will rise first. Then we who are alive, who are left, will be caught up together with them in the clouds to meet the Lord in the air, and so we will always be with the Lord. Therefore encourage one another with these words.”

Jesus will return and like he commanded Lazarus to come forth in John 11, so he commands the dead to come forth. And just like the people of these ancient cities would go out to meet a coming king, so we one day will ascend to the clouds to meet the Lord Jesus as he triumphs over death, our death.

The phrase, “caught up” in the clouds is often called the rapture. There’s a lot of debate about the rapture. Some say it will be secret and we will go to heaven for seven years. Some say we will come right back down to earth immediately and it will be obvious. Some say it will be before the tribulation, some say after.

But here’s some things we can all agree on.

1. The return of Jesus will be bodily

2. The return of Jesus will be obvious

3. The rapture will reunite us with our Lord

4. We will always be with him - all our separation will be done away with.

And I hope that’s an encouragement for you. Because the point of eschatology, or the study of end times, is not to have endless debates, but to encourage one another. And that is how Paul ends this section - therefore, encourage one another with these words.