Throat Punch and BBQ #1 (Stay on MIssion)

Why are we doing the Throat Punch and BBQ?

To open up the opportunity to talk about some subjects that are really needed to take men to the next step in their walk with GOD, their spouses, their children, their employment, and their purpose.

Why 18+

Because their are some subjects that we will deal with that are not fair to have in front of children that don‘t need to have this part of their heart opened up to these subjects. I need to talk with you about some dangers that if I’m honest my boys don’t know they will face. The issue is not that we are going to deal with mature material everytime, but when that time comes we can flinch we can’t pull punches. Truthfully their are errors that I keep seeing our men make that I don’t point out in front of your wives. And their are some things you need to deal with, without the concern that your son wouldn’t understand.

Why members only?

This isn’t an outreach. IF this were an outreach then I would need to bring the gospel for this is the only thing the lost man needs. I don’t think it wise to try to help a lost man with life modulation or correction. It is better for him to have his soul dealt with before. He has no grasp of the Grace of God to bring victory. So he will always be attempting what is spoken about here in his own strength.

This is a church thing. There are benefits to church membership. Being a member of SKBC has benefits and there are things you will have available to you that are not made available to the whole community.

There is a need. Whether or not you realize it there is a need for men in hte chutch to have some face to face time. We are a brethren. I don’t like some of these guys. Right just like real life brohters you don’t get to pick. But we are called to face life together and we will face down our enemy shoulder to shoulder.

There is a time for face to face when it comes to men. Then there is a time for shoulder to shoulder. We do the face to face stuff. But then there Will be some time for shoulder to shoulder. We are already planning some time for us to work together to see some good things accomplished. I’ll expect you to be there. What you are seeing here tonight is not the full demosntration of manhood. There are also times of gentle service. If you plug into the Throat Punch and BBQ you will experience all of it.

Game: Two men one candy bar Tallest tower in 60 seconds. I want to see how far we will go when we don’t have any loyalty to each other.

O but there is some Loyalty.

Opening Illustration:

A man cheating with another man’s wife

A man stealing from his employer

a man using the local church to further his notoriety

A man sneaking porn behind his wife’s back parentheses if you are not married yet you’re sneaking up behind your future wife’s back in parentheses

A man with an addictive masturbation schedule

A man sitting around on the job when was paid to do away a work man talking bad about a brother in the congregation

Man talking bad about his employer behind his back

A man stabbing his business partners in the back

What do all of these men have in common?

- They have no concept of what it means to be loyal.

Define loyalty: Faithfulness to commitments or obligations.

faithful adherence to a sovereign, government, leader, cause, etc.

Text: Genesis 39:7-20

I appreciate our game players tonight… I want to see how far they would go when they have no loyalty to each other. But they did didn’t they.

They had an obligation to not commit murder

They had an obligation to not break a bone.

They had an obligation to remember that it was just a candy bar.

Joseph is the hero of this passage… No one has ever read this text and thought: “you know if Joseph had just had sex with her things would have been better.”

Much has been learned about how Joseph did the right thing.

Flee youthful lusts

Run from sexual temptation

Many messages have been preached about the passage we consider this evening. All of them would deal with character and about Joseph correct answer to Potiphar‘s wife

Everyone of them would make Joseph the hero of the story. But it is easy to misunderstand why he is the hero of the story.

The reason he is the hero is already highlighted for us in the text. He was loyal. He understood to whom he was already obligated (9)

Genesis 39:9 KJV 1900

There is none greater in this house than I; neither hath he kept back any thing from me but thee, because thou art his wife: how then can I do this great wickedness, and sin against God?

He was obligated to Potiphar.

He was obligated to Potter for his wife

Most importantly those obligations were only intact because

He was obligated to God.

This one loyalty gave him permission to remain loyal to any others to whom he was obligated.

Our culture lives with not obligations to anyone. Or at least the deception that they have no obligations.

I have to look out for number one is the death of any institution where more than one Person is involved.

Indicators of broken loyalty…

Disloyalty to the Vow of Marriage - The Pharisees believed that you could look as long as you don’t touch. This was a wicked notion and it is a wicked notion now. And frankly we have men who claim a love for Christ Jesus that break their marriages vows on the daily.

Matthew 5:27–28 KJV 1900

Ye have heard that it was said by them of old time, Thou shalt not commit adultery: But I say unto you, That whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart.

Disloyal to our employers - It used to be common sense that you gave your effort to accomplishing the job you have been entrusted with. Some ask us to pray that they get a new job and then puts around and accomplish nothing.

Colossians 3:22–4:1 KJV 1900

Servants, obey in all things your masters according to the flesh; not with eyeservice, as menpleasers; but in singleness of heart, fearing God: And whatsoever ye do, do it heartily, as to the Lord, and not unto men; Knowing that of the Lord ye shall receive the reward of the inheritance: for ye serve the Lord Christ. But he that doeth wrong shall receive for the wrong which he hath done: and there is no respect of persons. Masters, give unto your servants that which is just and equal; knowing that ye also have a Master in heaven.

Disloyal to the provision of your Family. - While were at it…There are no rewards in heaven for not holding down a job. I don‘t care if you don’t make a ton of money. I don’t care if where you spend your money is different than where I would. I do see a Bible problem with a man that gets his family in such debt that he exposes them to loss and risk. There is nothing good with a man that can’t provide for his family. You ask a woman to marry you You leave father and mother that means you are standing on your own two feet and you are not making your wife suffer your laziness.

Get a job, Be good to your employer, get married, provide for your wife if you can help it do them in that order.

1 Timothy 5:8 KJV 1900

But if any provide not for his own, and specially for those of his own house, he hath denied the faith, and is worse than an infidel.

Disloyal to the Church - I recognize that it can be difficult to balance a job, family and church obligations. But I don’t understand men that don’t see Room for all the above. Maybe I’m a little biased. But I will say that there has been an obligation in the life of the believers since the establishment of the church in the first century.

Hey guys it is nice to come to a church and sit and recieve. It is nice to have little to no expectations. But I’ll make some room here. Some of you guys are fooling around and wasting your life on crap that doesn’t count in the end.

You can tell me the name of every marvel super hero.

You can tell me every golf course in 20 miles of this place and can’t name 5 senior saints that you’ve checked in on.

Your position at work will matter little when you get to heaven. Especially if you can’t name three people you’ve witnessed to in six months.

I have teachers that said they would visit their class and care for the small flock I trusted them with and they haven’t seen them in weeks.

You can’t build a church this way. It doesn’t work. If you don’t want to do the job says so. These are volunteer roles. Then you all that are setting to the back need to step up.

Guys A church takes work. It takes work that your not good at. But look at what we've been given. Hey I understand that we are shoot ing with a shotgun Here and that scatter shot is catching a lot of different people.

Ephesians 4:11–12 KJV 1900

And he gave some, apostles; and some, prophets; and some, evangelists; and some, pastors and teachers; For the perfecting of the saints, for the work of the ministry, for the edifying of the body of Christ:

I really should spend most of my time bragging on the ones crushing it above and beyond the call of duty.

I think that we can take time to ask ourselves why we move forward into a ministry and why we move backward away from ministry. And you are going to want to say that it was a loyalty to God and it not just be a thing we say.

Disloyalty to our leadership - Next time we are going to discuss your leadership with your wife. But let me remind you tonight that you are called to be the leader of your home. And you are not freed from that responsibility because our wife is filling the role.

I love what Marvin Smith told me years ago. “Men never take their hats off they just switch the one their wearing.”

Many of our guys are stepping back from their leadership in their homes. The problem with the fall was that Adam stopped acting like the king of the garden and let his wife lead. The curse was that she would always have desire to her husbands position.

Genesis 3:16 KJV 1900

Unto the woman he said, I will greatly multiply thy sorrow and thy conception; in sorrow thou shalt bring forth children; and thy desire shall be to thy husband, and he shall rule over thee.

Adam’s problem was that he stepped back and his wife stepped forward.

Hear me…If your wife is deciding whether or not you are loyal to your work, your family, or your church, you’ve stopped leading.

Problem is that wed rather be entertained with movies, video games, porn, fill in the blanks. I don’t have a problem for recreation time. But It is not meant to be your life.

Let me remind you that your wife and been instructed you and you will give account for her soul.

Hebrews 13:17 KJV 1900

Obey them that have the rule over you, and submit yourselves: for they watch for your souls, as they that must give account, that they may do it with joy, and not with grief: for that is unprofitable for you.

If your wife doesn’t grow as a Christian under your care that will be an issue in the day of accountability.

Men we will always be tempted to play out the perfect opposite of this account His name is David and her name was Bathsheba.

2 Samuel 11:1–5 KJV 1900

And it came to pass, after the year was expired, at the time when kings go forth to battle, that David sent Joab, and his servants with him, and all Israel; and they destroyed the children of Ammon, and besieged Rabbah. But David tarried still at Jerusalem. And it came to pass in an eveningtide, that David arose from off his bed, and walked upon the roof of the king’s house: and from the roof he saw a woman washing herself; and the woman was very beautiful to look upon. And David sent and inquired after the woman. And one said, Is not this Bath-sheba, the daughter of Eliam, the wife of Uriah the Hittite? And David sent messengers, and took her; and she came in unto him, and he lay with her; for she was purified from her uncleanness: and she returned unto her house. And the woman conceived, and sent and told David, and said, I am with child.

David had people to be loyal to in this passage and I’ll say even more than Joseph.

Loyalty to his own wife

Loyalty to his servant Uriah (her husband)

Loyalty to his Bathsheba as a subject of his Kingdom. (Her responsiblity to protect was his not her as a person.)

Loyalty to his Kingdom. (Time when Kings.)

Loyalty to God.

The question is then How does one remain loyal?

I think it is best for us to observe Joseph and his loyalty.

Flee temptation

Break Ritual

Keep the Lord as the motivation for your decisions

This is the point. Gentlemen we will always struggle with loyalty. If we do not have the grace of God to keep God at the center of our motivations. I can’t expect any of you to get better by trying. But I do expect that if you are born again then you will surrender yourself to his grace and allow Him to center himself as your priority.

Consider David’s restoration.

He sought forgiveness

He willingly took God’s correction

He made right to the people he hurt.

More importantly he put God back at the center of his motivations.

What would that look like?

What does God first look like in my marriage

THoughtlife

Church participation.

We start too often with “what do I want?” THis is and indicator that you are good at being loyal to you. The question is What does He want. Because you are loyal to him.

The Purposeless Illustration:

Call three guys up for a game have them stand along a table behind three covered piles oF Jenga blocks. Have one stack of Jenga Blocks Full and complete under a cover. Have another divided in to two smaller piles also under cover in two other spots down the table.

Announce the purpose is to see who can build the tallest tower. Then realize that “someone” made a mistake and explain that there were supposed to be three Jenga stacks there not just one cut in half. Then take the blocks from one of the contestants to make a full pile of blocks. Then apologize again and again through out the competition to the one contestant looking on.

[There will be a lot of take aways to from this game. The real issue is the pathetic sight of seeing a man do nothing while two others are competing.]

Make no conclusion to the exercise that they have just participated in. You will do so at the end of the Exposition.

But before any of this remember he had his eye on his purpose.

It had come from God

Her husband was its recipient

Illustration:

Adam - had a purpose before he had a wife.

it included hard work.

David - had a purpose before Bathsheba

Instead he skipped the work.