Distict Week 2- God Made You Distinct

Once in a while someone obviously stands out from the crowd, but most people are fairly similar at first glance. Until we really get to know each other, it can be tough to pick up on the distinct flavors of our personalities. For some people, blending into a crowd sounds great! But for others, they feel they were born to stand out. So what about you?

Would you rather blend in or stand out? Why?

INSTRUCTIONS: Give a few students a chance to respond.

If you're someone who likes to blend in, you may not have even volunteered to answer that question — and that's okay! We're all unique, and your uniqueness is beautiful . . . even if you don't love it when people notice. But if we're honest, this question isn't actually all that easy to answer. In some way, we all want to do both things at the same time: blend in and stand out.

We all want to be different and unique to some degree. We want to contribute something to this world that no one else can. We want our lives to mean something. But at the exact same time, we all want to blend in. No matter how loud, weird, or counter-cultural we want to be, we also want to fit in and be accepted — maybe not by everyone, but at least by certain people. So how do we balance these things? Is it possible to blend in and stand out? Can we be unique and be accepted? And if so, how?

SO WHAT? Why does it matter to God and to us?

STORY | Talk about a time you changed in order to fit in.

INSTRUCTIONS: Tell a story from your own life (or ask a volunteer or student to tell a story) about a time you changed something about yourself (or pretended to) to fit in with a person or group. Share why you made that decision, what you wish you would have done instead, and why you regretted it.

*High School Pic*

My freshman year of high school, I decided I wanted to change who I was to fit in.

So instead of wearing jeans and a t shirt like I did in junior high, I bought 5 pairs of Docker khakis and 5 dress shirts for each day of the week.

I remember one day when Josie Hire, one of the prettiest girls in our grade, came up behind me in the hallway and pinched my bum!

(She did it as a joke and wasn’t interested in me at all, buuut I still felt like a stud… I WASN’T!!!)

That year, Brittany Willoughby became my first girlfriend and then broke my heart when she broke up with me three months later… but I felt like I fit in for the first semester.

Then I realized something: I was being a complete fraud. So I decided this whole dressing prep stuff was stupid, and just went back to dressing normal.

Life Lesson: Don’t change who you are to impress other people, because if you do this, you will become a slave to what every other person thinks and eventually end up miserable and hating yourself whenever someone criticizes you.

I can't be the only one who's done this, right? Why do you think that is? Why do you think we try so hard to fit in?

Maybe we don't want to stick out because we're afraid sticking out will mean . . .

Getting unwanted attention. Being labeled as different. Getting mocked or attacked. Feeling vulnerable or ashamed of who we are. Of course, it's not bad to want to dress on trend or try out your friends' favorite hobbies. There are times, however, when the pressure to fit in is greater than our desire to be who we are or do what we were made to do.

SCRIPTURE | John 1:19-23

Last week, we saw that Jesus is distinct from any person who has ever lived, because He's God! The fact that Jesus is distinct is really good news for us, but today I want to help you see that . . .

You are also distinct from any person who has ever lived. Your distinctness is also good news. Your distinctness could be good news for the whole world too. There's a guy in the Bible named John — but not the John we talked about last week. This John, John the Baptist, was . . .

Jesus' cousin. He was only six months older than Jesus, so they grew up together. He was pretty unique — like, the lived-in-the-desert-and-ate-bugs-for-dinner kind of unique. And he had a unique mission. He was a messenger sent to prepare people for Jesus' coming. But when John shared the news of Jesus' coming, some people were a little confused.

INSTRUCTIONS: Read John 1:19-23

John 1:19–23 NIV

Now this was John’s testimony when the Jewish leaders in Jerusalem sent priests and Levites to ask him who he was. He did not fail to confess, but confessed freely, “I am not the Messiah.” They asked him, “Then who are you? Are you Elijah?” He said, “I am not.” “Are you the Prophet?” He answered, “No.” Finally they said, “Who are you? Give us an answer to take back to those who sent us. What do you say about yourself?” John replied in the words of Isaiah the prophet, “I am the voice of one calling in the wilderness, ‘Make straight the way for the Lord.’ ”

When it comes to realizing our own distinctness, John appears to have had it figured out. There are three things we can learn from him as we search to find our own uniqueness.

JOHN KNEW WHO HE WAS NOT. John owned the fact that he was not the Messiah (which means the anointed or special one). He wasn't Jesus and he didn't need to be. When John heard the rumors people thought he was the coming Messiah, it would have been easy to say, "Yeah, that's me! Everyone come bow down and worship me!" But John didn't need to steal anyone else's identity in order to have meaning or purpose.

JOHN KNEW WHO HE WAS. He knew God had created him with a distinct purpose — a purpose he and he alone could fulfill. So John was very clear about who he was. He said it for all to hear. He was the guy who was going to tell everyone that Jesus was on the way, and he was confident in that identity. (And no, he wasn't going to apologize for eating bugs either.)

JOHN KNEW HOW HE FIT INTO GOD'S PLAN. That doesn't mean John knew every detail of his future or waited for God to tell him exactly what to do every five minutes. It just means he understood the big picture of God's big plan.

John didn’t decide what made him unique and distinct — he looked at how God had made and equipped him. He didn't decide on his role either. He looked at what Scripture said. It contained prophecy that proclaimed John's purpose long before he was ever born. He quoted these parts of the Bible often to let people know he was part of God's plan — he was the messenger that had been promised.

SCRIPTURE | Isaiah 43:1-7

John's life and purpose was foretold by the prophet Isaiah. During difficult days in the history of God's people, prophets were sent by God to speak what God wanted people to hear in their times of need.

John would have known the words of Isaiah well, since Isaiah predicted John's whole existence. But that's not the only message Isaiah shared with us. Sometimes what the prophets said was hard to hear, but sometimes it was comforting and encouraging. We're about to read some of those comforting words Isaiah shared with the people of God. As we read this passage, focus on the language Isaiah uses to talk about God's people.

INSTRUCTIONS: Read Isaiah 43:1-7

Isaiah 43:1–7 NIV

But now, this is what the Lord says— he who created you, Jacob, he who formed you, Israel: “Do not fear, for I have redeemed you; I have summoned you by name; you are mine. When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and when you pass through the rivers, they will not sweep over you. When you walk through the fire, you will not be burned; the flames will not set you ablaze. For I am the Lord your God, the Holy One of Israel, your Savior; I give Egypt for your ransom, Cush and Seba in your stead. Since you are precious and honored in my sight, and because I love you, I will give people in exchange for you, nations in exchange for your life. Do not be afraid, for I am with you; I will bring your children from the east and gather you from the west. I will say to the north, ‘Give them up!’ and to the south, ‘Do not hold them back.’ Bring my sons from afar and my daughters from the ends of the earth— everyone who is called by my name, whom I created for my glory, whom I formed and made.”

These words were written specifically to the nation of Israel, God's chosen people. But the way God loves Israel in this passage is the same way God loves you. God, the Creator of the whole universe, who made the stars, planets, and galaxies, the one who made all living things, plants and animals, who created every single person who has lived, is living, and will live — that same God . . .

Created and formed you.

Is with you.

Cares for you.

Makes sacrifices for you.

Calls you a son or daughter.

If you've ever felt the pressure to change or hide who you are, listen closely to what God says about you. You are beautifully and wonderfully made. You're deeply loved by your Creator. Just like John the Baptist realized about himself, you weren't designed to be just like everyone else. God made you distinct.

*Title Slide*

NOW WHAT? What does God want us to do about it?

STORY | Talk about a time you discovered one way God made you distinct.

When we read the stories of people like John the Baptist, we might find it hard to relate. After all, he's a guy who had it all figured out, while we're struggling with insecurity, self-doubt, and confusion about who we are.

But realize we don't have John's full story — just bits and pieces. We may not know about the struggles he experienced while figuring out who he was and what God had called him to do, but I'm sure they existed. There isn't a person alive who hasn't struggled to figure out their own identity in some way. That's part of everyone's story.

INSTRUCTIONS: Tell a story from your own life (or ask a volunteer or student to tell a story) about a time you discovered one way God made you distinct after a period of struggle. Share what difficulties you faced in the process and how God ultimately helped you discover something distinct about who you were created to be. You might talk about struggling to identify a gift or talent, or experiencing a loss of confidence or identity, or accepting something unique about yourself that you previously tried to hide.

*Pic of Kyle, Tommy, Cody*

Back in 2005, I was still a new Christian. I served in our church in Middle TN as the worship leader for our youth group.

The youth pastor, Bubba Probus and I were good friends and worked well together.

He was great at planning fun events and services, I was good at showing up, singing, and having fun with the teens.

Bubba was part time youth pastor there and the Lord was calling him to full time ministry… so he moved to Kansas City.

( I ALMOST went with him)

But when he left, everyone looked to ME to lead the youth group.

Which included… preaching. To teenagers. Who have the attention span of an acorn.

I was TERRIFIED!

I was just a college student by day/ factory worker at night who hadn’t spoken to a group of people since my D.A.R.E. speech back in 5th grade.

So we had a friend of mine named Thomas, who was and still is an excellent speaker, come and preach for 4 Wednesdays and pray about becoming our youth pastor.

He did great each week and God really spoke through him… and the teens listened really well the first 3 weeks.

Then the fourth week happened.

I don’t know what was in the water, but these kids acted like they didn’t have a lick of sense and talked, screamed, whatever the whole time.

I felt awful.

And Thomas ended up being the youth pastor at another church on our district.

So there I was again, having to preach to a room full of teens and dreading it.

But after a few weeks of hanging with these kids and sharing the Word with them, God showed me that this is what my life should be all about, that this is what He was calling me to do: Pastor and preach and disciple teenagers. Tell them what the hard stuff that people didn’t tell me as a teen. Love them through their problems. 18 years later, I’m still doing it.

I could have made a lot more money in the factory and been really comfortable.. but I also would have been miserable.

A lot of people go through life like that… just doing whatever’s convenient instead of walking in the distinct calling God has given them. No direction, no joy, no focus. Just wandering through life...

YOUR DISTINCT JOURNEY

The journey to finding who God created us to be isn't always easy, but most journeys are like that. Your journey toward finding out who God created you to be will take an entire lifetime because who you are is always changing in some way — especially at your age. As you continue on this journey of discovering your distinctness, follow John's example.

DISCOVER WHO YOU'RE NOT.

Just like John, you don't need to steal anyone else's identity in order to have meaning or purpose. You don't have to be just like anyone else.

DISCOVER WHO YOU ARE.

Like John, when you find the things that make you distinct, celebrate them! Share them! Be confident in them! The things that make you unique were given to you by your Creator and they're good.

DISCOVER HOW YOU FIT INTO GOD'S PLAN.

Like John, you'll never know every detail of your future, so stop waiting for God to tell you exactly what to do every five minutes. Instead, look for the big picture of God's plan for you. What mission has God called you to do? How has God told you to live? What do you care about? And how do all of those things fit together? The Bible might not tell you which elective to sign up for this semester, or whether you should play soccer or lacrosse, or the name of the person you're going to marry. But it does tell you this:

You are created and formed by God.

Your uniquenesses was created for a purpose.

You are loved by God. God is with you.

When you really believe those things, your confidence in who God made you to be will grow.

REFLECTION | Gratitude List

So what if you took some time this week to focus on the ways God has made you distinct — even the unique things about yourself that you're not sure you like? What if you actually made a list? Then, what if you thanked God for those things — all of them?

PHYSICAL:

They could be physical traits, like your specific hair type, or that you're ridiculously tall, or that you use a wheelchair to get around.

CHARACTER:

They could be character traits, like how you find it easy to be patient with people, or you're a natural leader, or you tend to give your friends good advice.

SKILLS:

They could be talents or skills, like your love of writing poetry, or interest in science, or ability to make a successful YouTube channel.

EXPERIENCES:

They could even be unique experiences that have shaped you, like the kind of family you've grown up in, or that difficult thing you survived, or an awesome opportunity you've had. All of these things shape who we are. Some are things we were born with. Others are things that developed over time. But all of them are important parts of who you are (and who you're not).

INSTRUCTIONS: Before your program, print and cut the handouts provided in your Week 2 folder. Place one under each seat, along with a pen. Play some music quietly while students fill these out with a friend, a small group, or on their own.

But don't let this discovery process end here! Talk to some trusted friends and adults who . . .

Know you well. Can point out the distinct things about you that you may have missed. Speak truth when you begin to believe the lie that your distinctness isn't important, beautiful, or lovable. Sometimes we all lose sight of the ways God has made us unique — or maybe we never took the time to identify what makes us unique in the first place. Instead of finding peace and purpose in the distinct ways we're designed, we feel pressure to conform, hide, or change who we are. This week, if those feelings start to creep in, let me remind you what God says about you.

You are beautifully and wonderfully made. You're deeply loved by your Creator. You're on a journey to learn more about who God made you to be. And you weren't designed to be just like everyone else.