Finding God's Will? Part 14

Buyer’s Blues

What does the term “buyer’s blues” refer to?

Many people experience feelings of doubt, anxiety, panic, and guilt either immediately before or after the decision to make a significant purchase.

It is actually part of the job of people who work in sales to coax people through their Buyer’s Blues so they can finalize the sale.

Does this same phenomenon happen in the lives of Christians who face big decisions?

What does it look like?

Sometimes people are so afraid of missing God’s will that they cannot bring themselves to make a choice. Other times they make the choice, but then they immediately regret the decision they’ve made.

What are some things that can make “Buyer’s Blues” worse?

CIRCUMSTANCES! In what way?

Illustration: Friend accepted a pastorate in Alaska, van blew a tire, rental company took days to send help, ended up overturning the moving van damaging much of his property, among other incidents.

One friend told this pastor, “It’s obvious that you’ve missed God’s will.”

What do you think of this counsel?

Thankfully this pastor did not listen to his friend’s advice, but many Christians in similar situations have. Sometimes believers gauge their grasp of God’s leading by how well the decision works out. If the going gets tough, they assume that they must have missed the will of God. If they have smooth sailing, then they assume that God approves of their decision.

Is it right to think like this?

When things don’t seem to work out well, does that mean we’ve blown it and landed ourselves outside of God’s will? And if we have missed His will, is there any way back, or are we doomed to some permanent spiritual disability?

Principles to think Biblically about Buyer’s Blues

1. We are not always able to gauge what is working since we don’t always know what God is doing.

Sometime what seems like a disastrous decision in the short run, turns out to be extremely successful given enough time.

Also, people who are clearly following God’s will can sometimes experience very unpleasant consequences in the immediate aftermath of their decisions.

Acts 16:16–24 ESV

16 As we were going to the place of prayer, we were met by a slave girl who had a spirit of divination and brought her owners much gain by fortune-telling. 17 She followed Paul and us, crying out, “These men are servants of the Most High God, who proclaim to you the way of salvation.” 18 And this she kept doing for many days. Paul, having become greatly annoyed, turned and said to the spirit, “I command you in the name of Jesus Christ to come out of her.” And it came out that very hour. 19 But when her owners saw that their hope of gain was gone, they seized Paul and Silas and dragged them into the marketplace before the rulers. 20 And when they had brought them to the magistrates, they said, “These men are Jews, and they are disturbing our city. 21 They advocate customs that are not lawful for us as Romans to accept or practice.” 22 The crowd joined in attacking them, and the magistrates tore the garments off them and gave orders to beat them with rods. 23 And when they had inflicted many blows upon them, they threw them into prison, ordering the jailer to keep them safely. 24 Having received this order, he put them into the inner prison and fastened their feet in the stocks.

Hebrews 11:36–38 ESV

36 Others suffered mocking and flogging, and even chains and imprisonment. 37 They were stoned, they were sawn in two, they were killed with the sword. They went about in skins of sheep and goats, destitute, afflicted, mistreated— 38 of whom the world was not worthy—wandering about in deserts and mountains, and in dens and caves of the earth.

Their decisions to follow God’s will resulted in extreme hardships, but God placed His approval upon them.

The pastor who had such a disastrous move to Alaska, spent many years in that ministry until he retired.

2. God’s leading is neither miraculous nor prophetic.

How does God lead us? Providentially. Therefore His leading does not yield certainty. Explain?

However, as long as we are following the precepts and principles of Scripture, God’s leading is not a simple matter of obedience or disobedience.

It is more akin to the exercise of wisdom and sound judgement. It is possible for us to make an apparently sound decision that turns out to be a mistake, at least from some points of view.

3. God is quite capable of using our mistakes.

How does someone grow in the area of wise judgement and wisdom? We learn by making decisions. What is the best way to learn something? Sometimes, when we make mistakes.

Since making decisions involves making mistakes, then God must intend that we make at least some mistakes.

We learn to make good decisions through experience. We gain experience by making bad decisions.

So do we blame God for our mistakes? No, but we can trust Him to help us make the best of them.

God’s providential working in our mistakes is only limited by his creativity. And God’s creativity is infinite.

4. Growth in character relies upon endurance, and endurance requires suffering.

Romans 5:3–4 ESV

3 Not only that, but we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, 4 and endurance produces character, and character produces hope,

Some of our choices will result in difficult circumstances. But, God uses those difficulties in our lives to produce spiritual maturity. There is an order for how God produces maturity in our lives.

1). suffering, 2). endurance, 3). character, 4). hope.

God’s will is for His children to suffer enough to require them to show endurance, which will build up their character, eventually producing hope or anticipation. We cannot always judge whether our choice was according to God’s leading by whether it leads to a rose-strewn future.

5. Every choice, whether mistaken or not, opens a new path in front of us.

Once we are on that path, can we go backwards in time and choose another one? So what should we never do when we feel we are on the wrong path? There is not point asking how we might have fared had we chosen a different path.

God’s will is always that we tread our present path in the best way that we can to bring glory to Him.

This is part of moving forward.

Philippians 3:13 ESV

13 Brothers, I do not consider that I have made it my own. But one thing I do: forgetting what lies behind and straining forward to what lies ahead,

We have no true knowledge of what might have been. We never really know how things might have turned out had we chosen otherwise.

What does constant second guessing lead to in our lives? Misery!

6. Our new choices often bring with them new obligations.

These new obligations will determine, at least in part, God’s will for the future.

Example: Getting married- the time to ask for God’s leading is before the vows. After you say “I do” you must never think that God’s will was for you to marry someone else. God’w will is for you to remain committed to your marriage.

Example: Running up debt on your credit cards. God’s will is that you pay what you owe. You may decide that the charges were unwise and out of God’s will (and that might be true), but that no longer matters. God’s will is for you to fulfill your obligations.

7. Sometimes we make choices that we later discover to be conspicuously bad.

It was an obviously bad decision. If nothing binds us to that choice, then we might be able to take it back. Bad choices come from not paying attention to the criteria for good choices—criteria such as we have discussed in this chapter.

Bad choices may not always be sinful, but they are choices for which we are obviously unsuited.

What is the difference between endurance and obstinance? Endurance through a God ordained trail is a virtue. Obstinance in folly is a form of vicious pride.

When we can correct a bad choice, then we should correct it.

8. We must learn to be perplexed without despairing.

2 Corinthians 4:8 ESV

8 We are afflicted in every way, but not crushed; perplexed, but not driven to despair;

We have no guarantee from God that we will make every decision in our lives with confidence. We have no assurance that every choice will work out well.

Even the Apostle Paul made decisions in life that lead him into horrible circumstances.

What mattered in Paul’s life was that he kept pressing forward in the ways that mattered most: seeking to minister the gospel, strengthening the saints, and glorifying Christ.

Philippians 1:12 ESV

12 I want you to know, brothers, that what has happened to me has really served to advance the gospel,

What happened to Paul? He is in prison! But, what was the main concern that kept him moving forward? The advance of the gospel.

Does the Bible contain any promises that God will give us absolute certainty in our important choices?

What has your personal experience been?

Have you made choices that were followed by excitement and joy?

Have you made choices that were followed by Buyer’s Blues?

That doesn’t mean that those choices were out of God’s will or you didn’t have His leading.

“God doesn’t seem to be interested in having us torture ourselves with regret.”

He doesn’t want us constantly to be looking over our shoulder, wondering whether each choice that we made was “in His will.”

God does have a plan for each individual believer. And yes He does lead His children.

If we are seeking to honor Him, if we are choosing within the bounds of Scripture, and if we are employing the canons of wisdom and careful choosing, then we can trust Him to guide us providentially into the choices that He wants us to make. We can choose carefully. We should choose boldly.

Application Questions:

Have you ever made a choice that seemed to turn out badly in the short run but eventually proved to be the right choice?

Have you ever made a decision that you thought was good at the time but that you later became convinced was wrong? Were you able to retrace your steps and change the decision?

Can you think of examples where the Bible commends people for making decisions that went badly for them in the short run?