Wedding | Darryl Hauser and Ave Maria

SERVICE OF MARRIAGE

Prior to Service:

Enter Notes Below:

Invite ALL to Stand for the Bride

(congregation seated)

Words of Welcome:

To congregation:

This is the day the Lord has made. We will rejoice and be glad in it. Psalms 118:24 NLT

Today is a most special day!

On behalf of Darryl and Ave, I want to extend to all of you a very warm welcome.

We have gathered together in this most beautiful place in the presence of God to join Darryl Hauser and Ave Maria in sacred marriage, an institution ordained by God, and to be honored by all people.

To you, Darryl and Ave, may I express on behalf of your family and friends gathered here today that we feel such a deep and profound sense of joy to celebrate this sacred union with you.

Word of Explanation:

Through the witness of Scripture, we have learned that God has instructed all of those who enter into this marriage covenant to cherish one another with a mutual love; to share in the infirmities and weaknesses of one another; to comfort one another in sickness, trouble, and sorrow; to provide for one another; and, to partner with one another and the Holy Spirit to bless the world.

It is for this purpose, Darryl and Ave, that you are standing here today before God, one another, and these witnesses… to become united in sacred marriage and to celebrate the formation of a new family for the glory of our Lord, Jesus Christ.

Today, in the presence of your loved ones, both of you will declare your intent to marry, exchange vows, and give rings, all done in the full knowledge of what this sacred union means.

This kind of union - truly, this kind of love - now demands from both of you the highest form of human co-operation and sharing. This marriage covenant is binding until the day that death shall separate you.

Prayer:

Would you pray with me:

Heavenly Father, we thank you for the real life and love that only you gave to us through the sacrifice of your son, Jesus Christ. We praise you, and we give you our gratitude, Lord, as we align our hearts and our wills to you.

Thank you for Darryl and Ave. Thank you for the love that you have formed between them. Lord, thank you for the company of these friends and family members gathered here today. Remain with us now and always. In you name we make this prayer, Amen.

Declaration of Intent:

Darryl and Ave, before God and this gathering of family and friends, I am going to ask you to declare your intent to enter into this marriage covenant:

Darryl, will you have Ave to be your wife, to live together in the holy covenant of marriage; will you love her, comfort her, honor and keep her, in sickness and in health; and forsaking all others, be faithful to her for so long as you both shall live? If so, then answer, “I do.”

Ave, will you have Darryl to be your husband, to live together in the holy covenant of marriage; will you love him, comfort him, honor and keep him, in sickness and in health; and forsaking all others, be faithful to him for so long as you both shall live? If so, then answer, “I do.”

Now, to your witnesses gathered here with you today, do each one of you promise to support Darryl and Ave in their marriage together, honoring them, encouraging them, and praying for them? If so, then answer with an enthusiastic, “We do!”

Message Scripture Reading:

I would like to read a collection of short passages from the Apostle Paul’s letter to the church in Ephesus that teach us about the essential values of marriage. He wrote:

Live a life worthy of the calling you have received. Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love. Make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace. There is one body and one Spirit, just as you were called to one hope when you were called - one Lord, one faith, one baptism; one God and Father of all, who is over all and through all and in all. Ephesians 4:1-6

Therefore, each of you must put off falsehood and speak truthfully to your neighbor, for we are all members of one Body. In your anger do not offend. Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry. 4:25-26

Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful in building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen. And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, with whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving one another, just as in Christ, God forgave you. 4:29-32

Follow God’s example, therefore, as dearly loved children and walk in the way of love, just as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us as a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God. 5:1-2

For you were once darkness, but now you are light in the Lord. Live as children of light (for the fruit of the light consists in all goodness, righteousness and truth) and find out what pleases the Lord. 5:8-10

Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.

Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything.

Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 5:21-28

Wedding Homily:

Darryl and Ave, I want to offer both of you and your witnesses gathered here today a simple, yet profound charge: Serve one another.

In the passages that I just read, carefully hear these words: ‘be humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love.’

Truly, this kind of instruction demands the highest form of servanthood from both of you equally on behalf of yourself for the other… rooted in faith… and draped in humility.

Humility is an often misunderstood virtue. The true essence of humility means more than just merely thinking about yourself less, it actually means not thinking about yourself… at all. True humility means completely taking yourself out of the equation… for the sake of the other.

Humility is the solid bedrock on which to build a life long sustaining marriage. Even Jesus, the very Son of God, who alone deserves all of our praise and glory, did not hold onto his rights and privileges as the Son of God, but instead, he made himself… a servant.

Jesus gave up his ‘everything’ - his prestige, his wants, his desires, and his very rights as the Son of God - for the sake of the world whom he loved… for the sake of his bride, the church... and for the sake of each one of you… Darryl, Ave, and your witnesses gathered here today… and he calls all of those who enter into this sacred marriage covenant to do the very same.

Darryl and Ave, you are to love one another with that same kind of humility and service, which, ultimately, calls both of you to set aside your rights as individuals for the benefit and the blessing of the other.

In fact, if you want to know the secret sauce to a successful marriage… it’s not money… or time… or even good communication… it’s good old fashioned humble servanthood.

That’s it.

Everything good in marriage flows out of serving the other. If you consistently set aside yourself and make your mission in marriage to serve the other, then ironically - and truly, this is the great secret of marriage - your needs will always be met. And the two of you will discover a rare kind of joy in marriage that only a few ever find.

Therefore, I implore both of you to make your “marriage mission” about serving the another.

Darryl, your marriage mission is to serve Ave. Ave, your marriage mission is to serve Darryl.

In doing so, nearly every other aspect of your marriage will work itself out - conflict, mis-communication, different ideas about how to raise children, who does what household chore. If you consistently and faithfully seek to serve and want the best for the other, then these other issues will become less of a life tidal wave and more like a light ripple.

Only the two of you know what serving the other really means.

Throughout the duration of your friendship, courtship, and engagement, both of you have learned how to serve one another well for your marriage ahead of you. Hold onto those unique qualities that make up the foundation of your relationship, for God has graciously formed those distinct qualities between you.

Keep after the heavenly vision for your marriage, and let your past experiences and learnings continue to shape your life in Christ, together.

To bear with one another in love means remaining by one another through every argument, every illness, and every joy.

To bear with one another in love means always choosing your spouse - always choosing your spouse - ahead of yourself, no matter what person or thing, attempts to drive a wedge between the unity of your marriage.

This here [point to the two of them] from now on is your first priority... always.

As you begin day 1 of your marriage today and build a new family for God’s glory, always keep these three values from Ephesians front and center:

First is ‘hope.’

A well known theologian once said, “We must accept finite disappointment, but never lose infinite hope.”

I think every married couple here would agree that finite disappointments, grudges, and conflicts can feel like an eternity in the moment. But in reality, they only last as long as you let them. You all decide when conflicts and grudges end. Cherish the kind of hope that’s infinite, and let that be your perspective.

Another value is ‘unity.’

Remain together no matter what!

During our conversation together, we talked quite a bit about challenges that both of you have overcome… together.

Darryl, your life is a witness to God’s redemption.

Ave, your life is a miracle and a testament to God’s grace, surviving multiple attacks while on mission for Christ.

Both of you are well acquainted with challenges, but both of you have also experienced the overcoming power of God’s healing strength!

At the time, challenges in your marriage may feel daunting and even threatening to your marriage and family.

But over time, those challenges can become the very bricks with which God builds your foundation for a healthy, long-term marriage.

In the midst of whatever challenge both of you face, always remain united to your community - your family, friends, and your church.

See these people gathered here? These are your people for better and for worse. Don’t forget that. These are your people who support you… care for you… and love you. [[[Some of them have traveled long distances to be here with you.]]] Hold onto them. Fight for them… in the same way that all of you [[[look at the witnesses]]] must fight for Darryl and Ave. Don’t give up on them.

As you make your lives together, make sure to hold onto these loved ones, and you all [[[look at the audience]]] need to make sure that you hold onto Darryl and Ave.

And finally, always forgive.

Darryl and Ave, Forgive one another, just as in Christ, God has forgiven you.

Forgiveness requires the most complete commitment to humble servanthood, forsaking your desires for the benefit of the other. Forgiveness is true freedom, and freedom is joy!

I hope both of you come to realize that as you offer forgiveness to the other, you will not only set the other free from carrying the rocks of grudges and hurt, but in so doing, you will set yourself free to live into the very real and satisfying life that Jesus promised to give you.

Darryl, you are to forgive Ave just as in Christ, God has forgiven you.

Ave, you are to forgive Darryl just as in Christ, God has forgiven you.

Family and Friends, you are to forgive one another just as in Christ, God has forgiven each one of you.

Ave, submit to Darryl, respect him and honor him in all that you do. Humbly serve him, bear with him in love, cherish the source of your hope, maintain your bond of unity, and always forgive him when he falls short.

Darryl, love Ave and sacrifice for her in the same way that Christ sacrificed himself for the church. The full charge and responsibility of marriage goes to you, my friend. Keep your marriage holy, set apart, and engaged on mission for the glory of Christ in the world! Humbly serve Ave, bear with her in love, cherish the source of your hope, maintain your bond of unity, and always forgive her when she falls short.

Would you pray with me?

Exchanging of Vows:

We have now come to the moment when Darryl and Ave will exchange their vows to one another. Would you please face each other and join hands:

Darryl, please repeat after me:

I, Darryl,... take you Ave,... to be my lawfully wedded wife,... to have and to hold... from this day forward,... for better or for worse,... for richer, for poorer,... in sickness and in health,... to love and to cherish,… from this day forward... until death do us part... according to God's holy ordinance... and thereto... I pledge thee... myself to you.

Ave, please repeat after me:

I, Ave,... take you Darryl,... to be my lawfully wedded husband,... to have and to hold... from this day forward,... for better or for worse,... for richer, for poorer,... in sickness and in health,... to love and to cherish,… from this day forward... until death do us part... according to God's holy ordinance... and thereto... I pledge thee... myself to you.

Exchanging of Rings:

The wedding ring symbolizes both the unending love and commitment made to one another, as well as the unending love and commitment made by God to us.

Darryl, please repeat after me: With this ring,... I pledge my life... and my love to you.

Ave, please repeat after me: With this ring,... I pledge my life... and my love to you.

Prayer of Blessing

Please pray with me:

Heavenly Father, who created love and is defined by love, thank you for establishing marriage for the welfare and joy of humanity. You have said, "it is not good for man to be alone. I will make a helpmate for him." Now our joys are doubled since the happiness of one is now shared with another. Likewise, our burdens now have been halved since the troubles of one is now shared with another. Father, bless Darryl as he becomes Ave’s husband. May his strength be Ave’s protection; his character be her boast and pride. May Ave find in Darryl her haven and security. Lord, may you bless Darryl and continue growing his heart toward your grace and peace.

Father, bless Ave as she becomes Darryl’s wife. May her tenderness be Darryl’s honor; her love be his boast and pride. May Darryl find in Ave his respect and care. Lord, may you bless Ave and continue growing her heart toward your grace and peace.

May you grant them humility and softness of heart and mind toward one another. Unite their hands together to serve you. Father, as they seek your kingdom and righteousness, may all other things be added to them. May they come to know that perfection alone belongs to you, Father. Give them wisdom to minimize each other’s weaknesses, boldness to praise each other’s strength, and clarity to see each other through your kind and patient eyes. Lord, may they never take one another for granted, but always experience that breathless wonder that exclaims, "out of all this world, you chose me." And when life is done and the sun is setting, Lord, may they be found as now, hand in hand, still thanking you for each other, until at last one shall lay the other into your arms. This we ask in the name of your son, Jesus Christ, the great lover of our souls...

Ruth 1 Prayer

Darryl and Ave, I want to invite you to look at each other in the eyes, and repeat after me this prayer from the book of Ruth:

“Don’t ask me... to leave you and turn back. Wherever you go... I will go; wherever you live... I will live. Your people will be my people... and your God will be my God.” Ruth 1:16 NLT

Pronouncement:

Darryl and Ave, today before one another, your family, friends, and your Heavenly Father, you made a sacred covenant together, pledging your lives to one another and committing your joint relationship to God. As your community, we have witnessed both of you exchange your solemn vows, give rings, and join hands.

By the privilege vested upon me by God, I now pronounce you, husband and wife.

Kiss :

Darryl, you may know kiss your bride.

Benediction:

I would like to invite all of us to stand and join hands together as we pray a final ancient blessing over Darryl and Ave.

May the Lord bless you and keep you, Darryl and Ave.

May the Lord make His face shine upon you, And be gracious to you;

May the Lord lift up His countenance upon you, And give you peace.

Amen

Presentation:

Ladies and Gentlemen, may I present to you for the very first time,

Mr. and Mrs. Hauser.