RESET Your Relationships

Over the past few weeks, we have been asking the question, “Do we need to do some RESETs in our lives”? As the intro video shows, our worlds become very busy and can quickly consume us unless we intentionally do something about it. In the past weeks we have considered through the lens of the Bible…

- How to embrace tomorrow when tomorrow may not seem so exciting

- Living 100% for Christ

- Resetting our Finances to please God

- Rekindling our Marriages to be what pleases God and US!

This morning I want to ask a further question.

Is It Time to Reset Your ‘Relationships’ WiFi?

Everything seems to be connected via WiFi now. I saw an air purifier the other day that advertised WiFi connectivity. Our door locks, our doorbells, music, TV, news, vacuums, Alexa, Siri, Google, and much more are connected to WiFi. We have all shared in the frustration of times when there is a problem with the connectivity…and we are forced to do a RESET.

The RESET gets rid of electronic clutter or code that has throttled down the internet speeds. This happens in our lives as well. One of the areas where this happens is in our relationships with one another. Sometimes clutter just seems to get in the way. The problem is that God wants us to “love one another” and we cannot escape that command. In fact, we are better for it. Resetting for better relationships is ‘super’ beneficial.

God’s Speed is Best

I think that internet speeds are becoming meaningless. I remember going to staff meetings with a Major Pringle of the British army. He would report the amount of data that he and his team had reviewed from electronic sources. He began with megabytes, then gigabytes, and then he began to make up numbers. We joked about it on the way back to our workplaces. He said that it didn’t matter anyway, the numbers become meaningless.

Well, relationships are NOT meaningless. We are commanded to have awesome relationships with one another.

Galatians 5:13–18 NIV

You, my brothers and sisters, were called to be free. But do not use your freedom to indulge the flesh; rather, serve one another humbly in love. For the entire law is fulfilled in keeping this one command: “Love your neighbor as yourself.” If you bite and devour each other, watch out or you will be destroyed by each other. So I say, walk by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the flesh. For the flesh desires what is contrary to the Spirit, and the Spirit what is contrary to the flesh. They are in conflict with each other, so that you are not to do whatever you want. But if you are led by the Spirit, you are not under the law.

There are several important concepts in this passage about the freedom that the believer enjoys. However, there is no emancipation from Biblical relationships, especially within the body of Christ. In fact, there is a difference between indulging the flesh and walking in the Spirit as we will see.

Paul points out that the Galatians ought to be concerned about the way they handle their friendships. Simply, it is because the Law says so. “Love your neighbor as yourself”. This wasn’t just a ‘one off’ by Paul. It was the common teaching of Christ (Mark 12:28-34) and the NT church. [1]

The Parameters of God’s Best

In a relatively short amount of time, we have gone from 1G to 5G and now they are talking about 6G speeds. We now have interconnected smart cities and farms, AI at our fingertips, intelligent robotics working in our factories and autonomous cars with vehicle-to-vehicle communication. 6G will improve the current latency of 6 milliseconds to virtually none. Think holographic phone calls. Marcus Weldon of Nokia Bell Labs, says that 6G will be a “sixth sense experience for humans and machines.”[2]

People vastly underestimate the beauty of the power of loving one another. Paul describes the possibility of Christian charity to the church in Rome.

Romans 12:9–21 NIV

Love must be sincere. Hate what is evil; cling to what is good. Be devoted to one another in love. Honor one another above yourselves. Never be lacking in zeal, but keep your spiritual fervor, serving the Lord. Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer. Share with the Lord’s people who are in need. Practice hospitality. Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse. Rejoice with those who rejoice; mourn with those who mourn. Live in harmony with one another. Do not be proud, but be willing to associate with people of low position. Do not be conceited. Do not repay anyone evil for evil. Be careful to do what is right in the eyes of everyone. If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone. Do not take revenge, my dear friends, but leave room for God’s wrath, for it is written: “It is mine to avenge; I will repay,” says the Lord. On the contrary: “If your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him something to drink. In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head.” Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.

Sincerity, goodness, devotion, honor, hopeful, patient, faithful, generous, and kind. This sounds like the list of the Fruit of the Spirit. But this is Paul’s expectation of what “loving one another” looks like in the Church.

Parameter #1 - We are to love others as God loves Us

One of the parameters of loving others is to love others the way that God loves us.

John 15:12 NIV

My command is this: Love each other as I have loved you.

Parameter #2 - Love Everyone

William Booth was the founder of the Salvation Army. His ministry was to the people that were rejected by the religious societies of England. Originally, they tried to attend the local churches but weren’t allowed to use the front doors. Eventually they began their own services. According to tradition, among William Booth’s dying words was an order directed to his eldest son, Bramwell, the man who would take over the generalship of The Salvation Army from its founder. “And the homeless children, Bramwell, look after the homeless. Promise me ...” are the words he is acknowledged to have spoken.[3]

In 1910 when General William Booth was unable to attend their convention, he wrote a one-word message to be read at the beginning. It was simply “OTHERS”.

Parameter # 3 - Exhibit the Biblical Characteristics of Love

We are fortunate to have the example of Jesus, his teachings, and the teachings of the apostles to understand what the Bible means by love. In our Royal Rangers class a few weeks ago we read the story of the Good Samaritan, the true neighbor. Paul includes chapter 13 of 1 Corinthians as the characteristics of love and the bonding agent of the gifts of the Spirit. The Bible is filled with the true characteristics of what love should be.

Parameter #4 - Love Others in Action and Truth

Kids say the ‘darndest’ things, but they are often better observers than we give them create. Here are some of their observations about love in action.

Rebecca, age 8 -“When my grandmother got arthritis, she couldn’t bend over and paint her toenails anymore. So my grandfather does it for her all the time, even when his hands got arthritis too. That’s love.”

Danny, age 7 - “Love is when my mommy makes coffee for my daddy and she takes a sip before giving it to him, to make sure the taste is OK.”

Nikka, age 6 - “If you want to learn to love better, you should start with a friend who you hate.”

Tommy, age 6 - “Love is like a little old woman and a little old man who are still friends even after they know each other so well.”

Clare, age 6 - “My mommy loves me more than anybody. You don’t see anyone else kissing me to sleep at night.”

Elaine, age 5 - “Love is when Mommy gives Daddy the best piece of chicken.”

Jessica, age 8 - “You really shouldn’t say ‘I love you’ unless you mean it. But if you mean it, you should say it a lot. People forget.”

Love is more than 3 words. It demands both truth and action.

The Best IT Support

I often wish that we had the IT support at the church that I had back in the school district or in the Army. Between Sonia and I, we wrestle with the printers, the fire and alarm system, ProPresenter, mulitiple video screens, OBS, YouTube, DMX sequencing, sound boards, speakers, and video security systems (some of them not working). When these systems get ought of ‘whack’, it becomes a big problem.

I am glad to say that in our relationships we have the best IT support – He is the Person of the Holy Spirit. Let’s go back to our 1stpassage:

Galatians 5:16–18 NIV

So I say, walk by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the flesh. For the flesh desires what is contrary to the Spirit, and the Spirit what is contrary to the flesh. They are in conflict with each other, so that you are not to do whatever you want. But if you are led by the Spirit, you are not under the law.

When a system goes berserk it is extremely frustrating! When relationships go berserk it is even more frustrating. In fact, it is often a big criticism of the Church. But, here’s the reality, people are messy.

Galatians 5:14–15 NIV

For the entire law is fulfilled in keeping this one command: “Love your neighbor as yourself.” If you bite and devour each other, watch out or you will be destroyed by each other.

1 Corinthians 3:1–3 NIV

Brothers and sisters, I could not address you as people who live by the Spirit but as people who are still worldly—mere infants in Christ. I gave you milk, not solid food, for you were not yet ready for it. Indeed, you are still not ready. You are still worldly. For since there is jealousy and quarreling among you, are you not worldly? Are you not acting like mere humans?

“Biting and devouring”, jealousy and quarreling? We could create a list of other issues within the NT churches. So, what’s the solution? THE PERSON OF THE HOLY SPIRIT!

More than anything else, RESETting our Relationships demands that we walk in the Spirit. It may demand serving one another, forgiving, or speaking the truth in love and out of relationship with that person.

The unity brought by the Holy Spirit is revealed in Acts 4:32 where it says: “All the believers were united in heart and mind. And they felt that what they owned was not their own, so they shared everything they had.” The book of Acts describes the early church after receiving the Holy Spirit. It was the very Holy Spirit of God that brought about this kind of unity. This is the unity we need in the body of Christ today.

If we draw near to the Holy Spirit. He will place love in our hearts for our brothers and sisters and we will be compelled to unite. Ever heard the saying “There’s power in numbers”? The Holy Spirit knows this and looks to bring about that power in the church. We as Christians need to dedicate more time to understand the biblical scriptures about unity and apply them in our everyday lives.[4]

Get the Latest Software Updates

Before we wrap it up this morning there is one more thing that we need to do to have a clean RESET. We need to check for the latest updates. From time to time our devices need to be updated to get more information or clean out known errors in the code. This is called a software update.

For Christians this would be doing exactly what you are doing this morning – getting the Word of God at church. In a couple weeks we will explore the Bible more deeply as it regards friendships. The design is to love one another better.

Another way to get an update is to get involved in one of our community groups. Not only will you get to know others in the church, but you will also get involved in a discipleship program that is studying the major themes of the Bible.

Another way to get the latest software updates is to simply pray. Have a difficult relationship in your life? Pray for them. Pray to love others more. Prayer for others expands your heart for them and often overcomes difficulties that you thought were impossible.

Call to Prayer – “Lord, RESET my heart to love others the way that You want me to love them.”

[1] Douglas Mangum, ed., Lexham Context Commentary: New Testament, Lexham Context Commentary (Bellingham, WA: Lexham Press, 2020), Ga 5:7–15. [2] Fisher, Tim. 6G: What it is and When to Expect It. Accessed Feb 4, 2023. Lifewire.com [3]Simpson,Scott. “Honouring the final words of the Founder”. 20 August 2017. https://others.org.au/viewpoint/honouring-the-final-words-of-the-founder/ [4]Grant, Don Rev. “Finding Faith:Six ways the Holy Spirit transforms our lives. Accessed Feb 2, 2023. https://www.lockhaven.com/news/religion/2021/01/finding-faith-six-ways-the-holy-spirit-transforms-our-lives/