The Standard of Family

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Point: In God’s family there is a standard of roles and responsibilities that all are expected to meet and fulfill.
The Apostle Paul’s favorite term for believers is brethern. He used the term at least sixty times in his letters, and in 1 and 2 Thessalonians he used the term alone twenty-seven times. The Apostle Paul saw the local church as a family. Each indwelt by the Holy Spirit and each possessing the nature of God (1 Peter 1:22-25, 2 Peter 1:3-4).
Thus, as a family you function together, with different roles and responsibilites. Not having achieved perfection, each family will fall short in some way, but hopefully following the direction and example of Christ a family will mitigate the short comings with their love for one another, as Christ loves us.
A healthy family will provide encouragement, faith, hope and love. It will also be a place of strength, security, and sanctity. A healthy family will extend trust, instruction, correction, and rebuke. A healthy family practices and believes in forgiveness. A healthy family also has recognized leaders, and complimentary supporters who function together in following Christ. They employ and share their gifts, talents, and abilities to serve God and serve one another, making sure the family is provided for and protected.
Paul uses a body metaphor to illustrate the importance of the church fulfilling and functioning together in order to bring glory to God and order to His church on earth. Not one person is of greater or lesser importance than the other. All fulfill God’s function and God’s role for and within the Bride of Christ.
1 Corinthians 12:12 HCSB
For as the body is one and has many parts, and all the parts of that body, though many, are one body—so also is Christ.
1 Corinthians 12:13 HCSB
For we were all baptized by one Spirit into one body—whether Jews or Greeks, whether slaves or free—and we were all made to drink of one Spirit.
1 Corinthians 12:14 HCSB
So the body is not one part but many.
1 Corinthians 12:18 HCSB
But now God has placed each one of the parts in one body just as He wanted.
1 Corinthians 12:27 HCSB
Now you are the body of Christ, and individual members of it.
Paul is addressing the Thessalonians as first family, and secondly as members of the family, that have roles and responsibilites to fulfill, in order for the family to function, and function well. No one person is of greater or lesser importance, all are equal, but not all serve God in the same way, in the same role, with the same responsibilities. Not all are leaders, not all are prophets, not all are teachers, but all are valued, and to be valued, in the kingdom and economy of God.
Why is Paul addressing the Thessalonians about Leadership?
To be clear about roles and responsibilites. To uphold order. To affirm that those chosen and called to the role of leadership in the church are appreciated, valued, and obeyed.
1 Thessalonians 5:12 ESV
We ask you, brothers, to respect those who labor among you and are over you in the Lord and admonish you,
1 Thessalonians 5:13 ESV
and to esteem them very highly in love because of their work. Be at peace among yourselves.
Just as our own families have been established with a Biblical order of how things are to function, Paul affirms and upholds the function, value, and role of leaders in the Thessalonian church. How would your family function without the mom or dad in charge? What if the children were in charge of the family? How do you think your family would function?
There is to be a head in the home, being the husband in a Biblical household. The woman, is the second in command, and functions in a support role to the husband. The children are to follow and obey the lead of the parents or parent. As their is a created order, their is a function order in roles and responsibilites between a husband and wife, a man and a woman. Husbands are to love their wives and serve them as Christ loves the Church and gave His life for her, to make her holy (Eph. 5:25-26). Wives are to submit themselves under their husband, not because of inferiority, but because that has been their divinely-fitted position in God’s will and economy. Neither are inferior to one another, but each has a designated role and responsibility in God’s will and economy. Interesting enough Eph 5:21 preceeds Pauls teaching on the relationship between a husband and wife and says,
Ephesians 5:21 HCSB
submitting to one another in the fear of Christ.
Paul says to the church in Ephesus, to walk in love with each other, and that walk, being an imitator of God involves ‘submitting to one another in the fear or reverence of Christ’. Husbands and wives are to ourselves under one another in reverence of Christ. It is a picture of equality of persons, but not of equity in role and/or responsibilities.
1 Corinthians 11:3 HCSB
But I want you to know that Christ is the head of every man, and the man is the head of the woman, and God is the head of Christ.
Just as in a marriage between and man and a woman, their is equality in the church, but not equal equity. Different individuals have different roles and responsibilities, but are equally made in the image of God, and have equally fallen short of the glory of God. We are equally all sinners and equally all saved through Jesus Christ.
How are we to treat those in roles and responsibilities of leadership over us?
1. Accept Leaders - Just as a flock needs a shepherd, so each family needs a leader. As each leader has been given to a church to exercise God’s will (Eph 4:7-16), each leader is responsible to God, and the people, for his leadership (1 Peter 5:1-5).
Ephesians 4:11–12 ESV
And he gave the apostles, the prophets, the evangelists, the shepherds and teachers, to equip the saints for the work of ministry, for building up the body of Christ,
Ephesians 4:13 ESV
until we all attain to the unity of the faith and of the knowledge of the Son of God, to mature manhood, to the measure of the stature of the fullness of Christ,
Ephesians 4:14 ESV
so that we may no longer be children, tossed to and fro by the waves and carried about by every wind of doctrine, by human cunning, by craftiness in deceitful schemes.
1 Peter 5:2–3 ESV
shepherd the flock of God that is among you, exercising oversight, not under compulsion, but willingly, as God would have you; not for shameful gain, but eagerly; not domineering over those in your charge, but being examples to the flock.
2. Appreciate Leaders - the word used here in some translations is respect or recognition. The Greek term is eido [1492] which means to care for, to take an interest in. It is an act of volition - to will to care for and/or take an interest in. It is to know and love as God loves us.
Notice Paul’s qualification though, as ‘those who labor among you’ (v.12). The word ‘labor’ [2872] kopiao meaning in the context of in the work of the Lord [2962] kurios, the gospel work (Rom 16:8, 13; 1 Cor. 4:17., 9:2; Eph. 6:21). If a leader is not doing the work of the Lord, the work of the Gospel, among you, do not care for him. Correct him in love, if it is still not resolved we follow Matthew 18:15-20, the correction and restoration of a brother.
Matthew 10:40 HCSB
“The one who welcomes you welcomes Me, and the one who welcomes Me welcomes Him who sent Me.
1 Corinthians 4:1–2 HCSB
A person should consider us in this way: as servants of Christ and managers of God’s mysteries. In this regard, it is expected of managers that each one of them be found faithful.
3. Love Leaders - the word is esteem [2233] hegeomai to regard them as highly deserving of love. The word ‘love’ is agape [26] meaning sacrificially. It is the love spoken of of Jesus. It is the love He calls us to be towards one another. We are to love our leaders because they look out over us and for us because they perform the role and responsibility of exhorting, admonishing, and warning. They are the watchmen on the wall, the shepherd with the staff, the guardians of the Way. The same kind of welcome and love of Jesus, is how we are to love our leaders.
John 15:13 HCSB
No one has greater love than this, that someone would lay down his life for his friends.
John 17:26 HCSB
I made Your name known to them and will make it known, so the love You have loved Me with may be in them and I may be in them.
To love sacrificially is to make another known instead of yourself. It’s about their glory, not ours.
As a pastor, the question I should be asking myself, am I deserving of my flocks love? Am I being faithful as a servant of Christ and managing the mysteries of God? Am I doing the work of the Lord in equipping and loving the brothers and sisters for Jesus and His kingdom?
1 Corinthians 9:9 HCSB
For it is written in the law of Moses, Do not muzzle an ox while it treads out grain. Is God really concerned with oxen?
1 Corinthians 9:10 HCSB
Or isn’t He really saying it for us? Yes, this is written for us, because he who plows ought to plow in hope, and he who threshes should do so in hope of sharing the crop.
Love your leadership well if they are plowing in hope, the Gospel of Jesus. Share in that hope, and share in that work. Encourage them to keep going, stay in the field, for as your shepherd is faithful and healthy, a church will be faithful and healthly.
1 John 4:7–8 HCSB
Dear friends, let us love one another, because love is from God, and everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God. The one who does not love does not know God, because God is love.
4. Obey Leaders - God’s leaders, called and appointed, are to be respected and obeyed unless it is obvious they are out of God’s will.
Hebrews 13:17 HCSB
Obey your leaders and submit to them, for they keep watch over your souls as those who will give an account, so that they can do this with joy and not with grief, for that would be unprofitable for you.
As we are called to submit to Christ in all our relationships, and as a husband and wife are called to submit to one another in reverence of Christ, we are to submit to our leaders with the same love, care, and attitude. They have been appointed and called to their role by God, by a collective of brothers, following the desire and will of God.
Pastors and leaders are not infallible, are made of clay, and not unsusceptible to cracks and imperfection. Sometimes we break and fail. Pick us up and help mend us, and encourage us with your love and care. Point us to Christ, remind us to life our heads up to the cross, instead of looking at the world as it is.
As we accept, appreciate, love and obey our leaders, Paul assures the Thessalonians, and us, that we will peace amongst ourselves…the Spirit of God.
[Illustration] Moses, Aaron & Hur Unite - Exodus 17:8-16
How long can you keep your arms in the air? Or how long can you remain in the ready stance to defend in Basketball?
How long could Moses hold his hands up? How long can you?
Exodus 17:11 HCSB
While Moses held up his hand, Israel prevailed, but whenever he put his hand down, Amalek prevailed.
Exodus 17:12 HCSB
When Moses’ hands grew heavy, they took a stone and put it under him, and he sat down on it. Then Aaron and Hur supported his hands, one on one side and one on the other so that his hands remained steady until the sun went down.
After the victory, Moses built an altar and called that place ‘The LORD is my Banner’ (v.15).
Banner [3071] nissi = standard - a pole set on the tops of mountains as a call to the people to assemble for some great national purpose.
We are called to assemble to the standard of God! Are we as the church assembling to His standard and/or His standards?
The standard of sacrificial love for the care and interest of it’s leaders and each other. Are we answering God’s call to His standard?
Standards sybolized the gods advancing into the battle. The church is to be assemble to God’s standard of Christ in this world. This is what the standard of the Cross represents. Christ’ love to and in this world. His sacrifice. Am I assembling to His standard?
What was the standard of Moses? The Staff of God.
Exodus 17:9 ESV
So Moses said to Joshua, “Choose for us men, and go out and fight with Amalek. Tomorrow I will stand on the top of the hill with the staff of God in my hand.”
Will you and I assemble to Christ and be the Church we are called out to be? Sacrificial love is care and service to our leaders, each other, and to the world. Amen.
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