Love Before, Love After, Love Always

Love Before, Love After, Love Always

John 13:34-35 ““I give you a new command: Love one another. Just as I have loved you, you are also to love one another. By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another.””

John 15:12-17 ““This is my command: Love one another as I have loved you. No one has greater love than this: to lay down his life for his friends. You are my friends if you do what I command you. I do not call you servants anymore, because a servant doesn’t know what his master is doing. I have called you friends, because I have made known to you everything I have heard from my Father. You did not choose me, but I chose you. I appointed you to go and produce fruit and that your fruit should remain, so that whatever you ask the Father in my name, he will give you. “This is what I command you: Love one another.”

Valentines Day

Over the years Valentines Day has become the time we celebrate LOVE...

But not just any love…not sure if you know this but there are several different kinds of Love.

V-day has become about romance…chocolates and flowers to your sweetheart..

(the timing of eating a lot of chocolate the month after we all commit to weight loss seems a bit odd!!)

Love Songs - One of the oldest recorded love songs is actually in the Bible (Song of Solomon)…maybe some of you husbands want to try sining Song of Solomon to your wife on Tuesday ?!?!

But there’s also other kinds of love...

Bromance! - it’s what happens when grown men enjoy each other so much they turn into boys when they get around each other (Officer Owens took me and Alex down to the shooting range and I turned into a little kid)

Galentines Day Love

Brother Love - me and my brothers usually expressed that love in a wrestling match growing up

Mother/Daughter Love - special love which the daughter does something that sets off the mom, then the mom says something that makes the daughter mad…then they sit down to watch hallmark movies together! (to this day I still don’t understand)

(my family) Grandaddy and Meema Love sending specialty candied ables covered in chocolate, carmel, and even gummy worms for the grandkids)!

It may seem all in innocent fun…but the reality is the church has often let culture define the meaning of love instead of grounding our lives in the LOVE Jesus lived and taught!

We’ve learned to accept a cultural love of comfort and convenience rather than a cruciform love grounded in covenant.

The Result: We can easily start to believe that romantic love is the ultimate goal in life…leaving a lot a people feeling alone and others wondering why I don’t FEEL love like I used to.

Love is a source, not a feeling, and his name is Jesus.

As a culture, we are more connected than ever with more access to each other than ever...

…yet we are more isolated, lonely, and divided than ever…our unity doesn’t last, our marriages fall apart, and our families are broken.

WHY?!

Because we have traded a love of covenant for a love of convenience.

Convenient love…

Demands agreement before acceptance

How often have politics or ideologies divided our families?

How often have we withheld love because we see the world differently?

Is self-centered and easily offended

We’ve been taught that love is about what I want, what I feel, what is good for me....

Struggles to forgive

How often has bitterness and unforgiveness broken apart friendships and marriages??

Gives up and walks away when things are hard

In case you didn’t already know, loving someone unconditionally is hard....

Love doesn’t always feel like Valentines Day!!

…sometimes it feels like sitting in the car yelling at each other and throwing a fit (not that I know anything about that!!!!)

This portion of Scripture in John’s gospel is known as the Farewell Discourse. These are some of Jesus final words of instructions to his disciples before his death..

What does Jesus want them to remember?? THIS...

John 13:34–35

A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another: just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another. By this all people will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another.”

Why a new commandment? They already had the TEN COMMANDMENTS…wasn’t that enough?!

Because all the commandments come down to this: LOVE like Jesus loved

(look at this progression of commandments in Scripture…)

The Greatest Commandment : (Called the Shema) Deuteronomy 6:4-9 “Listen, Israel: The Lord our God, the Lord is one. Love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your strength.

The Great Commandment: Matthew 22:36-40 “Teacher, which command in the law is the greatest?” He said to him, “Love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your mind. This is the greatest and most important command. The second is like it: Love your neighbor as yourself. All the Law and the Prophets depend on these two commands.””

The New Commandment: John 13:34 “Love one another...as I have loved you.”

Jesus set the standard for the church as HOW WE LOVE

You will know my followers by those who keep my commandment to LOVE (John 13:34-35)

What kind?

The word Jesus uses is “agape” meaning the unconditional, selfless desire for the highest good of another.

Principle: When you love like Jesus loves whether you are single, married, preparing for marriage..a dad, a mom, a brother or sister…American, African…republican, democrat, independent…God’s Love will change YOU and it will change the world around you!

The Love that Jesus gives...

Leads to reliance on God rather than reliance on self

Have you ever been so mad at your child you just blurted out, “Lord please help me not to end this child!!!”

Any wives ever said that about your husbands??!!!

Long after you lose the FEELINGS of Love the presence of Jesus in your life will carry your relationships.

There’s a reason for that… You’re gonna need the presence of Jesus to love like Jesus loves!

Leads to a surrender of our will & preferences

Luke 22:42 ““Father, if you are willing, take this cup away from me—nevertheless, not my will, but yours, be done.”

John 15:13 “No one has greater love than this: to lay down his life for his friends.”

Leads to making room for others not like us

There’s a reason why are attracted to people who think like us, act like us, like the same things, believe the same things...

But Scripture tells us that WHILE WE WERE YET SINNERS, Christ died for us…he didn’t wait until we believed or agreed.

Leads to words that affirm and lift up rather than words that tear-down

Proverbs 18:21 “Death and life are in the power of the tongue, and those who love it will eat its fruit.”

Agape Love has a language and it’s rooted in the presence of Jesus in our home and in our words.

A little boy named Stevie, who was quiet and shy, moved to a new neighborhood. One day he came home from school and said, “You know, Mom, Valentine’s Day is coming, and I want to make a valentine for everyone in my class. I want them to know that I love them.” His mother’s heart sank at the prospect of her son’s rejection. Every afternoon she watched the children coming home from school, laughing and hanging on to one another—all except Stevie who always walked behind them.

But at the same time she did not want to discourage her well-intentioned son. So she purchased glue and paper and crayons, and for three weeks Stevie painstakingly made thirty-five valentines. When the big day came, he stacked the valentines under his arm and ran out the door. His mother thought, “This is going to be a tough day for Stevie. I’ll bake some cookies and have some milk ready for him when he comes home from school. Maybe that will ease the pain of not getting many valentines.”

That afternoon she had the warm cookies and milk out on the table. She went over to the window, scratched a little of the frost off the glass, and looked out. Sure enough, here came all the children, laughing, valentines tucked under their arms. And there was her Stevie. Though walking behind the children, he was walking faster than usual, and she thought, “Bless his heart. He’s ready to break into tears.” His arms were empty. He was not carrying any valentines.

Stevie came into the house, and his mother said, “Sweetheart, Mom has some warm cookies and milk for you, just sit down.” But Stevie’s face was all aglow, and as he marched right by her, all he could say was, “Not a one, not a single one. I didn’t forget one. They all know I love them.”