44 18.12

INTRODUCTION

In January of 2006, the Dallas Morning News ran the story of Jesse Stevens who was found lost in the woods.

Jesse, 77 at the time, was only fourteen miles from home when he took a wrong turn in his SUV and soon found himself lost in the woods. It was Saturday night and Jesse had been to a funeral for an old college friend. On the way home the paved road he was on suddenly ended and before he knew it he was in a wooded area. Perhaps a little confused, Jesse stepped out of his vehicle and ventured into the heavily wooded area. As he wandered about in the dark, he tripped and fell into the thick brush and tall grass. Jesse tried to get up and find his way back to his SUV when he fell again, and again. Every time he attempted to get up, he used all his strength and fell back down. After a while, he couldn’t get up again. The next morning, everything looked completely different. Jesse had walked about 150 feet from his SUV and he couldn’t see it through all the thick brush.

Early Sunday morning, it rained for the first time in a few months in North Texas and Jesse was able to catch a few trickles in his mouth. “I screamed hoping somebody would hear me,” Jesse said. Then he lost his voice. “I thought that maybe I’ll just lay here and die, and that’s the way it’s suppose to be.” So there he lay, in the middle of about twenty acres of a thick forest from Saturday night, all day Sunday, Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday.

For the next four days, Jesse could hear the cars on Interstate 20 driving by, but no one was able to hear him. There he was, still wearing shiny black shoes and his nice dark slacks that he wore to his friends funeral. “It looked like at night there was a blanket of stars over me,” said Jesse. “It kind of comforted me.” But he didn’t feel alone, he had faith.

Finally, on Wednesday, two bicyclists told police they noticed an SUV abandoned in the Mountain Creek Lake Park in Grand Prairie, several hundred yards south of Interstate 20. When the police ran the license plate number through a state database, they learned that the SUV belongs to Mr. Jesse Stevens, who had been reported missing.

Officer Daughtery was one of the first on the scene and he started scouring the woods on foot. About an eighth of a mile, Officer Daughtery saw a small metal shack and a body lying near it. Jesse wasn’t moving at all and the Officer didn’t think it was going to be a good outcome. When he ran toward Jesse, he remembers the man’s first words: “Boy, am I glad to see you!” Although hungry and dehydrated, Jesse was otherwise OK. Soon, the Officers and four paramedics carried him to safety. Jesse was admitted to Parkland Memorial Hospital in Dallas where he is expected to make a full recovery. There is no doubt that Jesse’s family was grateful to have found their loved one safe and sound!

Commenting on this story, John Mayes, a Church of Christ preacher in Texas, made three observations.

First, all churches today need to file a missing person report because every year there are some who wander off from God’s fold and are never seen again. Perhaps they left over a misunderstanding, or they were confused and thought no one cared about them. Somebody needs to do a head count to see if there are only ninety-nine in the fold when there should be a hundred. Is anyone counting?

Second, we need to actively and physically search for the one that is missing. When Jesse was lying in that thicket, weak, helpless and losing hope, he needed someone to rescue him and not simply mail him a note that he was missed. He needed someone to go on foot and look for him. Mayes says we need to go physically contact those who are missing. And yes, he says, it is everybody’s business. You are your brother’s keeper.

And third, we need to rescue them. Once Jesse was found, he didn’t need to be told how foolish it was to leave his SUV and venture out into the dark night, he needed to be rescued. He also needed more a pillow and some snacks. He needed to be taken to a place where he would be able to get treatment. We must do the same for those who are in a similar and desperate situation. Our job is to listen to them, counsel them, pray with them, encourage them, and lead them back to God.

This story, and the applications, sound similar to one Jesus told about a sheep that wandered off.

SERMON

We are in Matthew 18 again this evening, continuing this sermon of Jesus. I mentioned last week that this sermon focus on how we relate to each other. Last week we saw how Jesus said we should be careful not to become a stumbling block to others or lead them astray. In tonight’s passage Jesus talks about what we do when others fall away. We start with verse 12.

Video

No one is inconsequential or unimportant. Every person counts with God. His care is equally sincere for everyone. Jesus illustrates this with the story of the one sheep that is lost. Out of a hundred only one is lost, but even the one is important to the shepherd.

The story of the lost sheep was easily understood by those listening. In the Judean hills it was easy for a sheep to stray and become lost. When the shepherd put the sheep in the pen at night he counted them. If one of the sheep was the shepherd went back out to track it down and bring it back to the fold. Jesus gives us this story to illustrate God’s love for a single person. In his compassion, God doesn’t want anyone to be lost. The scene is of God going after his people like a shepherd, or of Christ as the Good Shepherd.

However, in this sermon, the focus of Matthew is on our responsibility to go after the brother or sister in Christ who is straying. This concern for the erring is different from the rabbinical attitude which represented God as being happier over a righteous man than over a sinner who repents. But Jesus said it is not the will of God that even one little one should perish. This is the model for our mission of love as disciples.

After this parable illustrating that we should go after those who may wander away, Jesus gives instructions about how to handle situations in which a brother or sister does something against us. How do we deal with sin in the church? As Christians we need to know how to deal with failure. The church is not a place of perfect people, but of forgiven people. We don’t have to be perfect to be good. Being saved is only the beginning in our walk with God. It starts us on the way. We are now in the process of maturing as we walk in the Spirit. And a part of that maturing process our maturity will be tested. The writer of Hebrews says of Jesus:

8Son though he was, he learned obedience from what he suffered 9and, once made perfect, he became the source of eternal salvation for all who obey him. (Hebrews 5:8–9)

This reference is to a maturing process in the life of Jesus, a maturity which came as He made right decisions. He then starts the next chapter by writing,

1aTherefore let us move beyond the elementary teachings about Christ and be taken forward to maturity. . . . (Hebrews 6:1a)

The steps Jesus lays out in this passage are easy to understand, they are not, however, so easy to carry out. They can be difficult for the one who has been wronged and they aren’t always well received from the one who has been doing the wrong.

The first step is simply to go to the person alone. Talk to the person face-to-face. Note that I didn’t say Facebook, but face-to-face. Go in person. As many good things as there are about Facebook, this is not the place to talk to someone about a problem you are having. Unfortunately, there are too many people who air out their problems on Facebook in front of the world instead of dealing with them privately as Jesus said to do. I heard someone suggest a new button be added to Facebook. You’ve got a like button. He suggested a “Too much drama” button. That might be a good idea. If someone has sinned against you or sinned against you go to them face-to-face. Often this is all it takes.

God is a God of restoration. He wanted to restore a relationship with his people so much that he sent his only Son to die on a cross. God wants to restore a relationship with us and he wants us to live in a right relationship with each other.

The drawback you hear from this is that most people don’t like confrontation. They don’t like confronting those who have hurt them. However, this is the instruction that Jesus has given. It’s your choice if you want to ignore it and not confront the person. However, if that’s the choice you make you also give up any claim to talk about it ever again. By not going to the other person you are saying you are going to drop it, forgive, and forget. The Bible says if your brother or sister in Christ sins against you go and talk to them about it. It doesn’t say to go and talk to as many people who will listen.

Unfortunately, that’s is often how it’s handled. We’ll tell people who don’t need to know. It’s not their concern and it’s not their business. That makes us guilty of gossip. And when people do that to us we need to quote this verse to them. They don’t need to be bring us their problems, they need to go to the person that’s hurt them. If they need help going to that person that’s anther issue, but often the offense is being shared only to make the other person look bad. Jesus tells us to go to the person who has offended us not to others.

Why do you go to the person who has offended you? The whole purpose is restoration. We don’t go to make them to make them feel bad, but to restore the relationship with them. If you can’t go with that goal in mind, wait until you can.

If that doesn’t work, if you’ve go to the person and they don’t want to do what’s necessary to restore the relationship, then you are to take it to someone else. Take one or two people with and go back to the person again. The purpose for the extra people isn’t to overpower the other person, but to have witnesses to the fact that you have tried to restore the relationship. The witnesses will hopefully be objective and help keep the conversation focused on the issue at hand.

Have you ever noticed that when two people disagree about something and start arguing that the issue can quickly spiral out to something else? Other issues get mixed in to this one. Before long neither knows what the original issue was. You two people who haven’t talked in years what the problem is and they can no longer recall the original problem.

Hopefully these witnesses will also be able to hear both sides. It’s rare that someone is 100% innocent. We understand how someone has hurt or offended us, but do we understand our role and where we were wrong – no matter how slight our error may be?

If this doesn’t work, if the person still doesn’t want to make amends, Jesus gives a third step – take it before the congregation – usually through the elders. This isn’t easy or fun and it’s not to be done without much thought and prayer.

What takes place when this happens? In the second step there were two witnesses who were there to see that the offended party tried to restore the relationship. This step may involve some investigation. What happened? What was said? Were there any witnesses? Remember, the goal is still restoration. So we respond lovingly with the word of God to bring them back to God and back to his people.

Then, there is one last step. If the person still refuses to listen Jesus says to treat them like pagan or tax collector. That means you are not to have anything to do with them. This is extreme, but there are times when it’s called for. When someone refuses to repent, refuses to do what’s necessary to restore a relationship it sometimes takes drastic steps. Once again, the purpose is restoration. The congregation doesn’t withdraw fellowship in anger, but in sorrow and love.

Think about what your parents would tell you before they spanked you. “This is going to hurt me worst than it will hurt you.” If separating ourselves from someone in this manner doesn’t hurt us we’re probably doing it wrong. If we truly love them we will not want to see the relationship broken. But neither can we turn a blind eye and pretend the offense doesn’t exist. Jesus loved sinners. He reached out to the tax collectors and ate with them. But he never tolerated sin.

Think about the story of the woman who was brought to Jesus after being caught in adultery. After showing mercy and saying he didn’t condemn her, Jesus told her to go and sin no more. That’s not tolerance. To the man at the Pool of Bethesda, Jesus said,

See, you are well again. Stop sinning or something worse may happen to you. (John 5:14)

This is the reality of sin. Jesus told one crowd:

. . . unless you repent, you too will all perish. (Luke 13:3,5)

Jesus never ignored sin, but spoke the truth in love. We are all sinners in need of the grace and forgiveness of God, but what we’re dealing with here is someone who refuses to acknowledge their sin and repent after repeated efforts to work with them.

If the leaders have done all they can this is the last step. And often it will not be a matter of the church leaders saying they will no longer fellowship with the individual, but of the leaders announcing the individual no longer wants to fellowship with the congregation. The individual has already broken ties because he doesn’t want to be confronted.

There is one more step that’s not recorded here, but we find in 1 Corinthians 5. Turn with me to that chapter because we’re going to read several verses. We can assume all the steps Jesus has given have been followed. Now Paul is dealing with the step after the congregation

1It is actually reported that there is sexual immorality among you, and of a kind that even pagans do not tolerate: A man is sleeping with his father’s wife. (1 Corinthians 5:1)

We don’t know what all the details are, but Paul says that even those who don’t believe in God wouldn’t do this. They are prone to a number of sexual sins, but not this.

2And you are proud! Shouldn’t you rather have gone into mourning and have put out of your fellowship the man who has been doing this? (1 Corinthians 5:2)

What were they proud of? They were proud that they were able to show grace and forgiveness to these sinners. But Paul says they should instead be mourning over the sin being committed. When was the last time you mourned over sin in the church? Paul then says that the person should be put out of their fellowship. He’s talking about this last step Jesus gave us in Matthew 18. If, after several confrontations, someone refuses to make things right, put them out of your fellowship.

3For my part, even though I am not physically present, I am with you in spirit. As one who is present with you in this way, I have already passed judgment in the name of our Lord Jesus on the one who has been doing this. 4So when you are assembled and I am with you in spirit, and the power of our Lord Jesus is present, 5hand this man over to Satan for the destruction of the flesh, so that his spirit may be saved on the day of the Lord. (1 Corinthians 5:3-5)

Notice why they are to do this. They do this not out of anger or resentment, but out of love for the person’s salvation – so that his sinful nature will be destroyed and he himself will be saved when Jesus returns. Paul still hopes for restitution and restoration. It is done out of a heartbroken love for the one who has sinned. It’s not easy, but the goal is restoration.

6Your boasting is not good. Don’t you know that a little yeast leavens the whole batch of dough? (1 Corinthians 5:6)

In the Bible yeast often represented sin. Just as a little yeast can affect the entire batch of dough, if you allow a sin to continue without being addressed it has the potential to affect the entire congregation. If it doesn’t matter what that person does then it doesn’t matter if I do it either.

7Get rid of the old yeast, so that you may be a new unleavened batch – as you really are. For Christ, our Passover lamb, has been sacrificed. 8Therefore let us keep the Festival, not with the old bread leavened with malice and wickedness, but with the unleavened bread of sincerity and truth. (1 Corinthians 5:7-8)

Paul says that Jesus has freed us from sin, therefore we shouldn’t continue to live in it.

9I wrote to you in my letter not to associate with sexually immoral people – 10not at all meaning the people of this world who are immoral, or the greedy and swindlers, or idolaters. In that case you would have to leave this world. (1 Corinthian 5:9-10)

Corinth was known for it’s sexual immorality. Outside of Corinth, if someone were know to be sexually immoral they might be called a Corinthians. It would be similar to calling someone a pervert. That’s how bad things were in Corinth. Even pagans who were committing all kinds of sins, looked down on the practices of the Corinthians. For the Christians there not to have contact with anyone who was sexually immoral would have been impossible. Paul says that’s not what he’s saying. Paul is limiting it to fellow believers. Even then, he’s not saying we can’t have anything to do with sinners in the church. We’re all sinners. He’s talking about people who sin and refuse to repent.

11But now I am writing to you that you must not associate with anyone who claims to be a brother or sister but is sexually immoral or greedy, an idolater or slanderer, a drunkard or swindler. Do not even eat with such people. 12What business is it of mine to judge those outside the church? Are you not to judge those inside? 13God will judge those outside. “Expel the wicked person from among you.” (1 Corinthians 5:9-13)

It’s not our business to judge the world. The only thing we share with unbelievers is the gospel. We’re not to share the Ten Commandments, but God’s grace. It’s God’s job to judge the world. We are however, to deal with sin inside the church.

I’ve said this before, but let me say it again, the ultimate goal is restoration. That was the goal of Jesus and that was the goal of Paul when he wrote to the Corinthians. And that’s what happened. After turning this man and woman over to be disciplined by Satan, they repented. We read in 2 Corinthians how they repented and Paul encourages the believers to restore them to fellowship.

5If anyone has caused grief, he has not so much grieved me as he has grieved all of you to some extent – not to put it too severely. 6The punishment inflicted on him by the majority is sufficient. 7Now instead, you ought to forgive and comfort him, so that he will not be overwhelmed by excessive sorrow. 8I urge you, therefore, to reaffirm your love for him. (2 Corinthian 2:5-8)

Jesus addresses this forgiveness back in Matthew 18:

18Truly I tell you, whatever you bind on earth will be bound in heaven, and whatever you loose on earth will be loosed in heaven. (Matthew 18:18)

Jesus is saying that it’s the church’s job to bind sin in the church. Sin is bound in heaven, therefore you have authority to bind it on earth. Righteousness and holiness, mercy and forgiveness are released in heaven, therefore you have been given authority to release them on earth. Binding and loosing speak of the authority the Church has in dealing with matters where sin is flagrantly, consistently, and obnoxiously practiced as it was in 1 Corinthians 5. The church has the right to bind sin and then to release forgiveness and restoration following repentance.

19Again, truly I tell you that if two of you on earth agree about anything they ask for, it will be done for them by my Father in heaven. (Matthew 18:19)

Private prayer is needed. Jesus instructed us to go to our inner room and pray where no one can see us. However, there are also times when we need to pray with others. Why? First of all, praying with others is motivating. You will pray more if you’re involved in a prayer group than you would otherwise. It’s like going to the gym to working out. If you work out by yourself, it’s real easy to miss week after week. But if you are going with three or four others they provide motivation for you to continue. The same is true of prayer.

And second, praying with others is purifying. When you pray in a group you tend to pray less selfishly than you might when praying alone. Too, in a group you can’t pray, “Lord, smash that guy. Teach that jerk a lesson.”

Jesus ends this section saying:

20For where two or three gather in my name, there am I with them. (Matthew 18:20)

We need to keep these words in the context of dealing honestly with church matters, relationships, and kingdom life. Dealing with sin is never fun. No one find delight handling problems and conflict. However, what we need to remember is that Jesus is with us. Too often, however, the church is impotent because she fails to recognize Jesus in her midst. Where the church is moving in the power of prayer and in the authority of binding and loosing, she will make an impact.

Paul wrote to the Romans:

If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone. (Romans 12:18)

That should be our goal. However, sometimes living at peace will require confronting those who are trying to cause problems. Then we should pray, and follow the instructions Jesus has given us.