A Valentine's Day Sermon

Valentine thought marriage was a big deal! But y’all are too young to get married, so why does it matter to you? Because you need to go ahead and learn what marriage is so that as the world tells you differently you can spot the lies! You need to go ahead and start thinking about your future marriage in these terms and planning for it to be according to God’s design! And we’re going to be talking about some stuff this evening that most of you are already encountering in one way or another!

read and pray

The Lord designed marriage (and sex) and we should follow his design because it points towards Jesus' love for us!

God’s Design for “Conjugal Rights” in Marriage

Marriage and sex are good gifts from God with good boundaries He’s given us.

One of the things we love to do when we go to the lake is to find some rocks to jump off of. The boys really love jumping and talking themselves into going up a little bit higher. But before we let them jump there’s a first step Kristen always makes sure that we take. We drive the boat along under the rock and we’re looking to see if there is anything under the water to be aware of. Looking to see if it’s too shallow to jump from there. Sometimes we can see a rock shelf under the water and we have to set a boundary for the boys. “Y’all can’t go past this spot to jump, you have to stay in this area.” As they look at it they may think it looks fine, but if they break the boundary that we have set for them as they jump off the cliff then they’re going to get hurt because there is danger under the surface that they don’t know about until it’s too late.

verses 1-9

God’s design for sex

Only in marriage

Hebrews 13:4 ESV

Let marriage be held in honor among all, and let the marriage bed be undefiled, for God will judge the sexually immoral and adulterous.

What is marriage?

A lifelong covenant between one man and one woman

Genesis 2:24 ESV

Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.

To bring closeness in the marriage.

To have children

Genesis 1:28 (ESV)

And God blessed them. And God said to them, “Be fruitful and multiply and fill the earth...

For a husband and wife to bring each other pleasure.

Song of Solomon 1:2–4 ESV

Let him kiss me with the kisses of his mouth! For your love is better than wine; your anointing oils are fragrant; your name is oil poured out; therefore virgins love you. Draw me after you; let us run. The king has brought me into his chambers. We will exult and rejoice in you; we will extol your love more than wine; rightly do they love you.

When we go outside of God’s design we put ourselves in danger. We may not see the danger, just like it may be difficult to see rocks under water, but it’s still very much there.

Also, when we get away from God’s plan we miss the beauty of it. Marriage and all that comes with it is meant to point us to Jesus and his love for us.

Ephesians 5:31–33 ESV

“Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.” This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church. However, let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.

God offers us good gifts with a good purpose. We need to receive these gifts with the intention of enjoying them for the same purpose He gave them.

Marriage is supposed to be a picture of the love and intimacy that Jesus has for his bride the church. He doesn’t love any other the way He loves his church. The church must look exclusively to Jesus for salvation and have eyes for no other object of worship.

Students, make your decision now based on the promises of God’s Word that you will enjoy these gifts as God intends. Trust that He wants what is best for you. Not to withhold joy from you, but to tell you how to have the most joy.

Affirm God’s definition of marriage…

Trust that the gift of sex should only be enjoyed and is most enjoyed in the biblical covenant of marriage.

A big part of the design of all this is that it’s exclusive and it’s life long, as Jesus’ love for us is exclusive and unending. that takes us to Paul’s next thought.

God’s Feelings About Divorce

The Bible says that God hates divorce. I believe this is because marriage is meant to be a picture of Jesus and the church and it distorts that picture.

Have you ever had a portrait drawn of yourself? I had one drawn when I was ten and I still remember this little girl who no one asked came up to it and did this… How would you feel if you had your portrait drawn and it came out really bad? Like this bad. You wouldn’t be happy because it makes you look goofy right? Not how you want people to see you, not your true self.

Divorce doesn’t help people see God’s true character.

verses 10-16

God also hates divorce because of the pain in brings.

Marriage isn’t always easy, but divorce always stinks…

I know this is a topic that affects a lot of us and there are a lot of situations and experiences with it. And if you need to talk about how it has affected you then I’m here for you.

But God has told us plainly and clearly that divorce is not good, the circumstances that lead to it are not good, and we should seek to avoid both.

This is a really difficult conversation because a lot of us have parents who have been divorced. We have step parents and siblings whom we love. We’ve got to remember in the midst of this that God forgives our sin.

1 John 1:9 ESV

If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.

We must also remember that knowing that God forgives does not give us clearance to sin and ask for forgiveness later. So students, resolve now that you if you get married you will marry a person pursuing the Lord and will do everything you can to protect and stay in your marriage.

It won’t be perfect, you will get hurt, but forgive as Jesus has forgiven you if you have put your faith in Him!

He forgives all who call on Him and enters into a covenant relationship with them by the blood He spilled on the cross.

Marriage is meant to be a picture, a metaphor of the relationship Jesus has with his people. Love and devotion. If you’re already in that relationship with Jesus, good! Start praying now that if you are married one day you will have a marriage that looks like Jesus and his church. Start thinking about that. Start praying for your future spouse. Start praying for your parents marriage to be this way.

If you don’t have a relationship with Jesus, let tonight be the night you begin one.

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