MARRIAGE CONF SUNDAY - DENNIS PISANI

SESSION WITH MATTY & JILL.

“And the rib that the Lord God had taken from the man he made into a woman and brought her to the man. Then the man said, “This at last is bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man.” Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.”

Genesis 2:22-24 ESV

Hebrew word dabak

“dabak”

Be joined – We can hardly overemphasize the minimization that occurs when the Hebrew verb dabak is translated in this seminal verse. NASB suggests, “be joined.” ESV “hold fast.” NIV “is united.” NLT “is joined.” The Orthodox Jewish Bible, “cleave.” None really come close to the meaning under the Hebrew umbrella.

Dabak is the action of attaching yourself to another as an expression of total unselfishness. It is the exact opposite of looking out for yourself. It is absolute commitment to the other person even when that commitment means your own interests are jeopardized.

Perhaps this is why dabak is also a defining verb for a relationship with God. Too often we imagine that our relationship with YHVH is about our benefits. We trust Him so that we are saved, we get to heaven, we are healed, we are blessed, we are forgiven—or whatever else we get. But this is not a dabak relationship at all. The true relationship with the Father is about how we identify with Him, how we fulfill His purposes, how we bless His name. Spiritual awareness leads to loss of self. That does not mean I cease to exist, as some great mystics teach. It means that I exist for the sake of the other, whether it be God or men. We have such a tragic and terrible absence of this sentiment and action in our world that we hardly recognize it anymore. We are the children of Sodom, living for what we can get. No wonder God asks us to be set apart.

Message Title: “TOGETHER” In a MODERN SETTING…. A MODERN TIME.

Fighting for the LOVE: ……Working through a busy life?

(These are 4 steps we believe will work through ANY of the issues you face in your marriage and relationship: if you do these 4 things you will come out on the other side in a better place)

Here is the Idea; we all have crazy busy lives and were trying to make IT ALL WORK while making THIS (a marriage) work. Have you ever felt like there’s no way? Somethings gone break? The task tis just too hard & someone or something is gonna give out with this pressure?

Here is the Q: DO WE JUST GIVE in and allow us to become defeated? No we don’t - we come to a conference and we get with god and we implement these things into our lives so we can LIVE the life God has called us to! As an overcomer!

SO WERE GONNA BE STRATEGIC HERE - With Principles.. but also VERY PRACTICAL. With steps you can implement along the way….

Here we go:

1.STICK “TOGETHER”.

Recognize that God is for you, but the enemy is AGAINST you.

Your better “together”

You have BIG God.. but you also have an adversary!

The Enemy DOES NOT LIKE the FORCE that is the TWO OF YOU going strong and crushing an amazing calling.

DON’T EXPECT IT TO BE PEACHES & CREAM ALWAYS - it’s a battle! You’re CHRISTIANS which means you have to fight the battles when they come. SO BAND together.

the Bible says we are better TOGETHER (conference name) and our marriage is blessed by God. So realize that it’s what it is, and you calling remains - You can do it!

Practical Tip & Story:*Jill and I prayed for a “big God-sized life* which meant God would answer that prayer… but it didn’t come without opposition. Big time. We’ve experienced and continue to experience t to this day = But we realize that GOD IS on our size. He is FOR US.

But we have to FIGHT TOGETHER… which means unity/ Unity God blesses

Psalm 133:1–2 (NIV)

1 How good and pleasant it is

when God’s people live together in unity!

Stick together!

Because Her Battle is MY BATTLE

When Jill is in a battle - Im in it with her? WE come together (I can pray over her,. I can bless her as a husband and vice versa)

When Matty is in a battle - Its actually her battle also (MJM early on in career - Jill walked with me through that).

2.STAY “TOGETHER”:

Sit down and be realistic about what you have going on

When was the last time you sat down… over coffee… or went away for a night… or had dinner alone and TALKED about What it is you’ve got going on in this season or the one to come?

There have been times when we have had to STOP, take inventory of this BLESSED LIFE and realize… have we overloaded ourselves here?

We want to give you permission today: say no if it’s going mean dysfunction or a lack of HEALTH.

Why would you add things in if all it’s going to result in is a STRAIN.

“The blessing of the LORD brings wealth, without painful toil for it.” ~Proverbs 10:22

Are there things you don’t NEED to ADD.

Maybe you need to SUBTRACT.

Write this down: What you ADD… you must MAINTAIN. (This is why we need WISDOM!)

This is a key for busy families.

There have been things that have come along that we’ve said NO to…. Because we understood that the addition would mean an ongoing pressure or stress!

Practical Tip & Story: Sit down and count that cost… Sometimes I have to make that call for our family. I have to say to Jill - We cant add that in! We have too much we are already doing!

THEN YOU HAVE SOMETHING YOU’VE AGREED OVER

THEN COMES THE POWER OF AGREEMENT (***story about who takes our kids to school; .we have our days!)

Once we are honest together. We can go-ON together. But if we skip this step there is potential for BLAME. Bitterness… STRUGGLE. Reaction. Instead of “hey we already talked about this

3.STRATEGIZE TOGETHER.

Come up with a PLAN. To DO WHAT YOU NEED TO DO.

Together… ask yourselves…. What is the GOAL:?

Together…. Ask and really think through ….What is the OUTCOME?

Write those things down.

Do you have a Strategy that you TOGETHER can then PRAY over and Commit to the Lord?

Proverbs 16:3

3  Commit your work to the Lord,

and your plans will be established.

Story:

How do we strategize and ensure that our marriage just doesn’t become a business relationship?

We have a plan to be alone!

We have dates scheduled.

We have time we get alone.

Every week Jill and I KNOW there will be time where we can have time where it’s JUST HER AND I.

“HOPE IS AN ANCHOR, NOT A STRATEGY”.

If you don’t strategically IMPLEMENT IT.. ie schedule it… IT WONT HAPPEN.

MEN: Get a date night IN THE CALENDAR

WOMEN: Get ready for a date night!

For finances it’s the same thing. Budgets are a two way street. You have to have a strategy. Do you ave one?

What’s the goal?

What’s the plan?

Now let’s TOGETHER…. Follow through and see some success in our lives! Amen!

Stick together

Stay Together

Strategize Together

& Finally.

4.OVERCOME TOGETHER.

success will come

one day at a time

one week at a time

one season st a time

PRAYER TIME: HOLD HANDS/.

Pray over every family