Gods at War - Love

Well, we are coming off of the single most important holiday of the season. Valentine's Day. Am I right? Like, this is this is the greatest holiday ever. Now, here's the thing. I've discovered that Valentine's Day is quite polarizing, right? Some people hate it. And those people that hate it, they love to dog the people who love it. And some people love it. And the people who love it, they love to dog the people who hate it. We all have opinions about Valentine's Day. Like we all have opinions about our pizzas, right? Some of us swear by one pizza. And if you agree, great! But if you if you differ from that, then you are absolutely wrong! I wonder if we ever make our opinions, idols. But that's not the topic for today. That's another story.

We are continuing on our God's at War series where we are looking at idols. And what we've been kind of saying is that every day these things battle for our attention, our time, our resources, our families. Some of these idols are easily recognized and others are more subtle. As we allow them into our lives, they feed off our true desires, our hungers and our wants. We think they bring fulfillment and purpose. But before long, they take control, they grip us tightly and they convince us that they belong. And we find ourselves at war with these idols, these false gods. And oftentimes we surrender ourselves to these idols. And so we've been looking at what some of these different idols are over the past handful of weeks.

And so, coming off of Valentine's Day, we are fittingly going to continue with this series and we're going to talk about the idol of love. Now love is quite prevalent in our culture, right? That's kind of an obvious thing to say. Again, we just got off of Valentine's Day. It's a day where our infatuation with love is on full display:

the roses - the roses that you can buy a week before Valentine's are now three times the price for Valentine's week.

The candy - the candy that you can buy Chelsea got me heart candy heart, with little chocolates and at Russell Stover, like this. They usually have like 20 different pieces of candy, we open that thing up and there were there were, I think seven or eight pieces of candy. And it cost the same if not more!

the chocolate, the candy, the dining reservations, that you have to book no less than a month and a half out in order to get anywhere good. But it's not just February 14 that touts the idea of love. It is literally all over the place. Think of the hallmark movies, the rom coms, the bachelor, and then the Bachelorette.

And even shows like Chicago Fire and Chicago Med and Chicago PD that are seemingly about something else - shows about our public servants and the work that they do on a day in and day out basis. But the reality is, they are simply another avenue to paint the love story. And then there's the more extreme portrayals of Love. TV shows like love Island. If you've never watched it, maybe you should consider yourself lucky. And there's a show called Love is blind, where people get married to people that they've never even seen. I think that they even talk to each other through a wall and then they finally see each other down the road. And if that weren't enough, there's a love is blind Brazil edition. And then there's a love is blind Japan edition. I even saw that there is a show called dating on the spectrum that follows people on the spectrum as they look for love. The list goes on and on and on.

And we haven't even mentioned the songs about love and we can't go on because we will be here forever talking about all of this stuff about love. And don't mishear me. I'm not bashing any of it. I love love! The romanticizing of love in and of itself is not bad. I think though as we've talked about with all of these idols, it's not that they are necessarily in and of themselves bad. It's when this kind of love becomes the sole pursuit of our lives. In other words, when it becomes idolatry, that's when it becomes a problem.

Now some of you like the dysfunctional aspects of love show. Some of you really dig some of those shows I mentioned and others simply because of the dysfunctional nature of love that is portrayed. Some of you have all of those shows queued up on your Netflix and you love the dysfunction. No shame! But can I introduce you this morning to another option for you to find these dysfunctional love stories? It's the Bible. And I want to invite you this morning into one of those stories.

We're going to be in Genesis chapter 29. This morning, and if you'd like I would invite you to follow along, We're not going to read the entire story but we will we will pick up in a minute in Genesis 29. This is a story that has lots of dysfunction. I also want to say from the beginning that there are lots of directions that this story could go. And the things that I'm kind of pulling out of this story for this particular sermon, are no way intended to minimize some of the other stuff that may be found in here. In fact, there are some things in this story that will leave you scratching your head and wondering why is it happening that way? I don't want to minimize that. But that's simply not where we're going to land today.

In Genesis 29, we find the makings of a true love story, the kind you would expect to find on reality TV. It's a love story that takes an unexpected turn, like many love stories do. It begins when a man named Jacob falls in love with a young woman named Rachel. Now we don't have time, again, to read the entire story of Jacob and Rachel. But let me catch you up to where we're at. Jacob, the second born son of Isaac was the brother of Esau. Now if you remember Jacob receives, or rather Jacob steals, Isaac's blessings. And he goes on his way. He goes about in hopes of finding family to work for, after stealing, Isaac's blessing. And as he goes on his way, he happens upon some flocks of sheep. Come to find out, this was the flock of Laban, which happened to be Jacob's maternal uncle. Again, there are parts of this story that are just weird, and there's weird parts of love stories throughout the Bible. And it just is what it is. And we can't get sidetracked with that this morning.

So, Jacob comes upon this flock of sheep and finds out it's Laban’s flock. Laban is kind of who he was looking for. And the shepherds that were there watching the flock, they sent for Laban at Jacob’s request. And while Jacob was waiting for Laban, Laban’s second born daughter, Rachel came to where Jacob was waiting with the flock. Now, this is one of those kind of classic romance movie scenes here, right? Jacob is there among the sheep, and he's waiting for Laban to come in from a distance he sees this beautiful young lady walking towards him. And it's just like, it's just like the movies portray. He sees her from a distance. And as she comes closer, she starts to come into focus. And it is just love at first sight. And so Rachel comes to where Jacob is, with the flocks. And the Bible tells us that Jacob greets her with a kiss.

Now a little bit later, Laban gets there. And Jacob basically agrees to work for Laban and his flocks. Now Laban, after Jacob had been working for a couple months, Laban tells him Hey, you can't work for free. You know, your family, we got to take care of you. What is it that you want to? What is it that you want to earn? How can we pay you how can we pay you for your contributions for the work that you are doing?

We're going to pick up the story here in Genesis 29. Starting in verse 16. Now Laban had two daughters. The name of the older was Leah, and the name of the younger was Rachel. Leah had weak eyes, but Rachel had a lovely figure and was beautiful. Jacob was in love with Rachel and said, I'll work for you seven years in return for your daughter, Rachel. Laban said it's better that I give her to you than to other some other man. Stay here with me.

So Jacob and Laban, enter into this agreement to work for seven years for the promise of Rachel. Now, how's that for commitment? All you lovers of love are like, awwwww, that's so sweet. Working for the wife for seven years. That is commitment. How wonderful is that? Now working for the wife was not an uncommon thing. But some scholars seem to think that perhaps seven years was probably a bit excessive. But Jacob was good with it. And if that wasn't sappy enough, listen to verse 20. So Jacob served seven years to get Rachel, but they seemed like only a few days to him, because of his love for her.

Gag!! right? Like, those are those comments that, for us as guys hate when other guys say things like that because it makes us look bad!! He works for seven years and Scripture says because of His great love for Rachel, that seemed like only a few days. How beautiful is that.

But that's part of the craziness of love, right? We get caught up and we get in trouble because there can be a completely irrational side of love. We have a hard time thinking objectively, about people or even things that we love. Our emotions sometimes get involved and we don't see things clearly.

Let's continue on the story, verse 21. Then Jacob said to Laban give me my wife, my time is completed. And I want to make love to her.” Jacob approaches Laban as his seven years have been completed. And he says it's time to give me my wife. It's time to consummate this marriage. And now comes the twist in the story. The twist that I think makes this love story, Netflix worthy.

As we approach this twist, I want to draw your attention back to the history of Jacob. Scripture of full of ironic connections and I want to point out one here. Remember the story of Jacob? Jacob was the second born of Isaac, and who had deceived his father into stealing his father's blessings from his firstborn brother, Esau. Remember the deception that that Jacob was involved in. And now it seems as though this deception is coming back to haunt him.

Listen to verse 22-25. So Laban brought together all the people of the place and gave a feast. But when evening came, he took his daughter Leah, and brought her to Jacob. And Jacob made love to her. And Laban gave his servant Zilpah to his daughter, as her attendant. When morning came, there was Leah. So Jacob said to Laban ‘What is this that you have done to me? I served you for Rachel, didn't I? Why have you deceived me?’

Again, there are these cultural things that we don't necessarily understand but essentially Laban deceives Jacob into consummating his marriage. But instead of consummating the marriage with Rachel, he consummated the marriage with Leah, the first born. Do you see the ties between this idea of the first and second born and deception? There's these flashbacks to what Jacob had done to Esau.

So Jacob approaches Laban and says, What have you done? This is not what we agreed upon. And Laban essentially tells him that that's not how we do things. The firstborn goes first around here. And so Laban requires another seven years for Jacob to earn Rachel and Jacob does it. And after seven years, eventually Jacob marries Rachel, the one that he loved, the one that he had been working for, for 14 years.

And in the dust of that love story, You have Leah. Verse 30, listen to the way this relationship is described. Jacob made love to Rachel also, and his love for Rachel was greater than his love for Leah. And he worked for Laban another seven years.

Leah loves her husband. And Leah wants more than anything else for him to reciprocate those feelings. She spends her life hoping and dreaming of the day that she will feel loved from her husband. She essentially makes it her life goal to win the heart of her husband, Jacob, She puts her hope in love. This love is seemingly becoming an idol for her. But Leah has something going for her. She is able to have children. While Rachel, Scripture tells us, is barren. In this context, in this culture, this was a significant deal.

And so Leah is able to provide Jacob with children. And with every child she gives birth to, Leah thinks - Maybe now my husband will finally notice me. Maybe now he will finally actually love me. I want you to listen to the record of the names of the children that Leah gives birth to.

Verse 31 - When the Lord saw that Leah was not loved, he enabled her to conceive, but Rachel remained childless. Leah became pregnant and gave birth to a son. She named him Reuben, for she said “it is because the Lord has seen my misery. Surely, my husband will love me now.” She conceived again and when she gave birth to a son, She said, Because the Lord heard that I am not loved, he gave me this one too. So she named him Simeon. Again, she conceived and when she gave birth to a son, she said, now at last, my husband will become attached to me, because I have brought him three sons. So his name was Levi.

The names of her sons reveal the God of her heart. With every son, she thinks, finally, Jacob will love me. Love, or at least the idea of love had become the God that she worshiped.

And gain, don’t hear what I’m not saying. Happily ever after, Love Songs, sappy love stories are not a bad thing. Relationships are a gift from God. The trouble arises when relationships replace God. And this goes for any relationship, not just romantic ones, relationships with our children, relationships with family, relationships with friends. When relationships replace God, they become idolatry. When we make the love of another person the God of our lives, we place incredible pressure on that relationship. We're basically saying I want you to do for me what only God can do for me.

And at the end of this chapter, we see this tiny detail that points to a possible realization that Leah has. Listen to verse 35. Again, Leah had just had three sons. And now she has had her fourth son, verse 35, says Again she conceived, and when she gave birth to a son, she said, “this time, I will praise the Lord.” So she named him Judah. And then she stopped having children.

Finally, it seems that Leah stopped looking to her husband, for those things that only God could give. And she turned to God and said, This time I will praise the Lord. See, Judah was finally a name that was not related to a loveless relationship with her husband. Rather, Judah was a name that expressed praise to the Lord. It seems as though Leah realized that she would never obtain her fair share of Jacob's love. And that what really mattered was the worship of Yahweh.

And this is one of those ideas presented in Scripture that is not hard to see how this plays out in our current day, right? Like all of those love things that I talked about in the beginning about love shows and candy and flowers. But can we get a little bit closer to home for a minute?

Sometimes when we talk about idols and things like this, it's really easy to be critical of worldly culture. But can we be honest enough here in this place to admit that this isn't just a Hollywood problem? This hits really close to home for our Christian culture. If we're really honest, can we be honest enough that we have at times elevated romantic love to a form of idolatry? That we have propped up married life as the ultimate goal. That sometimes the language we use Places undue pressure on people to find that special someone. In fact, we've even gone so far as to imply that married life is the pinnacle of life. It's the pinnacle, even of our Christian life. It's on our Christian college campuses. The term ring by spring is a well known phrase that floats around our Christian colleges.

It's in our Christian media. If you've ever read a Karen Kingsbury book, you know it's there. I've had more than one significant conversation with young women who are struggling in their pursuit of happiness in relationships. And it's very clear that a contributing factor is the portrayal of love in our Christian culture - of finding that special someone that God has for them who will be absolutely perfect.

And suddenly, the well intentioned pursuit of God's will, becomes the idol of love. But we don't we don't want to be too obvious in this idolatry, right? And so we come up with other ideas to counter that. And it seems to be good on the surface!

We kiss dating goodbye so that we can focus on our pursuit of God. And that's a great thing, right? But then we tag on well meaning quotes, like “a woman's heart should be so close to God that a man should have to chase him to find her.” And I feel like maybe a woman’s heart should be so close to God, just because that’s what God wants for her… not so that some man knows where to find her!

And I can't help but wonder if we actually use our pursuit of God as a means to an end. Specifically as a means to the end of romantic love. Like, I'm going to focus on my relationship with God, so that eventually, I'll find the right girl. I've done it!

Can we go back to Leah for a second? From my reading of this story, there seems to be no evidence that this praising of the Lord changed Leah’s standing with Jacob. It doesn't say in Scripture, that because Leah finally repented of her idolatry and turned and praised God, that eventually God gave her the desire of her heart. And Jacob loved her more. The Scripture doesn't tell us that.

And so the temptation, I think, is to give into praising God SO THAT in turn, we get the desires of our heart. But then, if we're honest, we are simply worshipping the idol of our desires.

When it comes to the pursuit, and worship of God, “I will praise the Lord” has to be our end game, not simply a means to another end.

Can we go to the verse in Joshua that we’ve been pointing to each week of this series? Joshua 24:23 “Now then, said Joshua, throw away the foreign gods that are among you and yield your hearts to the Lord, the God of Israel.”

I wonder, have we made love one of those foreign gods that prevents us from yielding our hearts to God?

There is a broad demographic here. And for some of you, this idea of pursuing romantic love is very applicable, because you are right smack dab in the middle of that time of your life. But again, the experiences in this church are broad. We have teens, young adults, single, married, divorced, widowed.

Perhaps it may seem difficult to apply this particular message to your life where you are today? Can we take a look at the root of this pursuit of love? I think, then, we can all find some common ground. I think at this root of this idolatry of love, we find the desire to be accepted. The desire for approval from other people.

Surely now, after giving Jacob all of these sons, he will love me. Notice me. Approve of me. Accept me. See me.

Those are all desires that we have all had, right? And I don’t want to imply that those desires are bad. It’s when they become our sole pursuit that they turn to idolatry. So, wherever you find yourself this morning, may I encourage you to find a way to respond as Leah did after son number 4? “This time I will praise the Lord!”

Let’s pray.