Living With Humility

Introduction

What seems weird to me might seem normal to someone else…

In the passage we’ll look at today, Peter says some things that might seem weird to us. But let’s not be so quick to reject them.

Review

One of Peter’s main themes: How do we live as Christians in a non-Christian society?

He starts by building our identity because who we are determines how we live.

We are elect exiles: those who’ve been chosen by God and set apart by the Holy Spirit to become like Jesus in every way. Living like Jesus often puts us at odds with the culture around us. That makes us exiles.

We have been born again into a living hope, an eternal inheritance, and a coming salvation. This is a priceless gift that sustains us even when we are rejected and ridiculed for living like Jesus.

We are the children of God, called to be holy like our Father is holy. God cares about how we live because he loves us and redeemed us from a meaningless life. And God cares about how we live because his plan to redeem the world is to send redeemed people into the world.

1 Peter 2:9-10. We are a royal priesthood. That means (1) we have direct access to God through Jesus, and (2) we are God’s representatives to the people in our lives who do not yet know Jesus as God and Savior.

In verse 11, he shifts gears and begins to teach us what it means to live out of that identity (1 Peter 2:11-12).

He tells us to “Be subject for the Lord’s sake to every human institution…” (1 Peter 2:13).

And then he gives three examples of human institutions.

The government: Christians should be model citizens.

The workplace: Christians should be model employees.

In today’s passage: Marriage.

To the Wives (Stephanie)

Attitude (1 Peter 3:1-2)

Submission: Willingness to give in (when necessary), cooperative attitude. What it doesn't mean: Control, manipulation, nagging, mothering.

Conversation: Conduct = conversation, "live a life that speaks for itself." This is the best way to "win" but can only happen in the environment of a submissive attitude.

Inner Man Focused (1 Peter 3:3-5)

The external doesn't define our value--how relieving!! (Great news that is opposite to the messages the world gives us relentlessly as women. We don't need these external things to have meaningful marriages).

The inner person of the heart: gentle and quiet. (meek like Jesus/undisturbed. Only women who know just how valuable they are in Christ can remain in this kind of posturing. And this is true beauty--it doesn't fade and is precious to God.

Power in the Hope of God (1 Peter 3:5-6)

The example of Sarah "calling him lord" acknowledging him as "lord" in her heart.

"who trusted in God" - KJV… "holy women hoped in God" the point is that our hope is in God, our trust is in God and we demonstrate that strength of our inner man when we submit to our husbands and when we walk free of fear (end of v. 6).

To the Husbands (Andy)

1 Peter 3:7 (ESV)… These are profoundly radical words in Peter’s cultural context.

Let’s just make a few observations

“Likewise, husbands…” Of the three institutions Peter tells Christians to be subject to, marriage is the only one in which he gives directions to both parties… Both husbands and wives are to be subject in the institution of marriage.

“they are heirs with you of the grace of life…” Anyone who reads this passage in 1 Peter 3 and thinks Peter is demeaning women has misinterpreted the Scripture. In that society, women were not allowed to inherit. But in God’s household, wives have equal standing with their husbands in Christ. This was a fundamental departure from cultural practice.

“the woman as the weaker vessel…” It’s easy to misunderstand this as a negative statement. But that’s not at all what Peter means, as we’ve seen. The word “vessel” means a jar, a dish, or a vase. Women aren’t inferior, they are priceless.

Now, let’s apply these truths and see how to be Christian husbands (here’s how husbands submit in a marriage)

“Likewise, husbands, live with your wives in an understanding way, showing honor to the woman…”

Husband, your wife is a treasure. Treat her as such. Love her. Cherish her. Honor her with dignity and respect. Protect her. Don’t use your physical strength to intimidate her into submission. Instead, recognize her as your equal in Christ. God has called you to be the leader of your home. That means you are the lead servant of your family (Matt 20:25-28).

Here’s what’s at stake: “so that your prayers may not be hindered.” God is so adamant that husbands treat their wives with dignity, respect, and equality that he says if we don't, he won't answer our prayers. To my knowledge, this is the only time in the Bible that God says he won't answer our prayers!

Summary: Peter does not call wives to be the servants of their husbands. But in calling husbands to be the leaders, he calls them to be the servants of their wives. Wives are called to submit to their husband’s leadership, and husbands are called to submit to the leadership role of serving their wives.

How This Works in a Real Marriage

The decision making process in the Fuqua house…

An example from the Martin home…

Conclusion: Prayer for Marriages

Wives are called to submit to their husband’s leadership, and husbands are called to submit to the leadership role of serving their wives.

This requires humility, and a willingness to put your spouse ahead of yourself.