Dark truth of Depression!

Setting

It’s been all night like this in the kings chamber, wailing, moaning, high pitch screams, yelling, convulsive crying. “It’s all my fault!” “I should have never looked her way, I should have never tried to hide it, I killed him!” “God’s finger pointed out to me that it’s my fault!” “O my son Absalome, my son, my son Absalome!” “I wish I were dead!” With a covered face, weakened by a night of wrestling with God. David is sick, in deep spiritual anguish, he is lamenting, “O my son Absalome, my son, my son!” Cf. 2 Samuel 18-19.

He knows the problem stems from his own selfish choices, Psalm 6:1. God has turned against David, God is not happy with him at all. David is feeling the pressure of being out of touch with God, but still clings to a thread of hope, Psalm 6:4, 10. David complains to God, Psalm 6:5. David complains about what stands in opposition to his life, Psalm 6:6-7.

Side Note

Sin and personal failures are not always the root causes of depression, everyone’s situation is different, but they can be a contributing factor. We never down play or minimize the causes of depression, however they are defined.

Struggle

I have a history with depression! My world collapsing all around me, the darkness my safe place. I know the feeling of being stuck and life going nowhere. Having no joy, never smiling, uncontrollable screams, crying for no reason, angry, extremely lonely. Screaming at my daughter for just eating breakfast on the way to school. Watching my wife shoulder the burden having to self diagnose because I will not talk.

I feel sad. I find no enjoyment in life. Eating to survive, cannot sleep, but feeling tired all the time. No real purpose in life, can’t sit still, wringing my hands, pacing, thoughtless stares. Feeling worthless, guilty, lonely, isolated, withdrawn. Darkness, I can hide! Cannot gather my thoughts, what was I saying? I feel like I am dying! I am depressed!

There are four groups of people that approach depression from a different angle.

Those who view depression as a sin.; lack of faith, lazy. God’s judgment for sin committed.

Those who view depression as a medical issue. It is caused by some chemical imbalance.

The middle of the road group who know little to nothing about depression.

The depressed who are left feeling guilty, defensive, and confused.

Subscription

“Eighth octave” meant to be played on an eight stringed instrument. It is composed of a low bass key and a high tenor key. The Psalm divides into these two tones. Psalm 6:1-7, the low bass, a mournful tone is coming from the Psalmist. Then an abrupt change, Psalm 6:8-10, a higher tone. The Psalmist rises from the ashes of depression with a fresh perspective on God!

Objectives

To understand that life can shift without notice and become dark and filled with clouds, depleting hope and destroying happiness.

Christians have what we need to permit our hearts to catch up to our faith, we have a God to turn to, and promises to rehearse and rely upon.

Not to be clinical but rather practical and spiritual.

Not to talk too much about depression, not coming across as therapeutic trying to diagnose. Not to emotionally stimulate, but turn our attention from inward to upward towards a God who alone can dispense the darkness.

Recognize Jesus dealt with emotional anguish, Psalm 6:2, cf. Matthew 26:38 “38 Then He said to them, “My soul is deeply grieved, to the point of death; remain here and keep watch with Me.””

Take Away

God is there with you in the depression.

Supposition

The Psalm divides into two unequal parts, Psalms 6:1-7, the dark and depressed mindset. Psalm 6:8-10 a defiant faith. We tend to tarry longer in our despair than to rush with great desperation to the place where God is.

I. The Depressed, Psalm 6:1-7.

David’s souls is on fire, he is tormented with thoughts, suffering the pangs of relentless regrets, crying for release, he is distressed, in a dark place, despondent, drenched with sweat and tears, David is desperate, David is depressed!

David expresses four depressive sentiments.

“This is all my fault!” Psalm 6:1. David knows that God is not happy with him, and he know he has brought this on himself. David understands there are consequences to choices, he is praying that God will be merciful, Psalm 6:2. David is overwhelmed, he is hoping it will not be as bad as he supposes it can be.

Not every season of depression or emotional anguish stems from personal failures. God can use our suffering to achieve character development, Romans 5:3-4 “3 And not only this, but we also exult in our tribulations, knowing that tribulation brings about perseverance; 4 and perseverance, proven character; and proven character, hope;”

“I can’t take much more!” Psalm 6:2-5. David is at the end of his rope, at the point of breaking and giving up under the pressure.

David feels he is Slipping, Psalm 6:2, it’s beginning to take its toll physically. “Pining,” or “Languishing,” David is fading fast!

David feels stuck, Psalm 6:3, will it ever end, is there light at the end of this dark tunnel, “How Long?” (Hebrew figure of speech, “sudden silence”), overtaken with emotion, he sits and stares into nothing, words fail him, he cannot say anything. Gripped with fear, Psalm 6:3, and anxiety over the outcome.

David feels stranded, Psalm 6:4, Where is God in all this? God has turned His back on David, “return,” wherever God is, I can’t find him! David does not have the strength to get to God, God please come to me!

2 Timothy 1:7 for God gave us a spirit not of fear but of power and love and self-control. God is with us in our depression! Note several guarantees when feeling as if this is more than I can take.

When I am feeling helpless and hopeless return to the promises of God which will help in reviving hope and reawakening faith.

Don’t be naïve to think the Bible will give immediate relief or turn around, don’t become frustrated when it doesn’t get fixed right now!

Wait on God to work in His time, Psalm 40:1 I waited patiently for the Lord.

We’ve all made mistakes, God will forgive and restore, cf. Micah 7:8-9.

Learn to thank and praise God right now! Psalm 86:10-13.

“I’m not going to make it!” Psalm 6:5. Any life left in David was slowly being depleted and David’s situation is literally killing him. 2 Samuel 18:33 Would I had died instead of you, O Absalome, my son, my son! David is coming to a place where he won’t have the vitality to even praise God. David feels that he is never going to make it! David does what we all have done, bargains with God. “God if you do _________…then I will forever do ___________.” David becomes lost in a maze of “if only’s,” and “what if’s.” Guilt is often bargaining’s companion. David begins negotiations with God.

““If thou lettest me die, thou wilt lose one singer out of thy earthly choir; but if thou wilt let me live, I will remember thee; I will praise thee; I will give thee thanks.” —CH Spurgeon.

“I’m tired of dealing with it!” Psalm 6:6-7. (Central Axis of the Psalm) Climax of emotional torment! David is on the verge of complete breakdown!

“Weary,” means, “reluctance to experience any more!” “I am worn out!” Ancient Hebrew pictograph, it is to breath out your last breath!

“Wastes,” means, “to no longer function normally; incapacitated” “to fail!”

I am weary, I have nothing left in me to give!

I flood my bed or I make my bed swim, I feel like a fish out of water, floundering, flailing, can’t catch a breath, drowning!

Every night, the night is the worst! Silence and loneliness, darkness.

My eyes are wasting away, I’m tired of dealing with it! I’m exhausted from trying to figure it all out. It’s undeniable that something is wrong!

David is tired of the terrorizing, torments his enemies, their threats, nagging and insulting, harmful intentions, Psalm 6:7 grief because of all mine enemies. (The worst for me the enemy voices clamoring in my head constantly.)

Depressed, exhausted, behold helping himself! He cannot even pray! David cannot get ahead “my adversaries!”

II. The Determined, Psalm 6:8-10.

The tone changes. It is an abrupt change! Flipping of a coin! From tragedy to triumph, from victim to victory! A low bass note to a high tenor octave. The cause of change is uncertain, but even if it his circumstances hadn’t changed, David felt a stirring in his soul of God’s peaceful assurance everything will be okay! This quick shift indicates the answering touch of God! You like can change in a moment! God must be the focus, your darkness, depression, despair cannot be permitted to be turned internal, but vertically. You cannot be selfish with emotional anguish!

Be determined not to be a victim, Psalm 6:8a. David is not rebuking the threats of his enemies, David has not strength left to even stand against his enemies, but simply stating they are no match for God. David refuses to be their victim and stands on the ground of God’s faithfulness. GOD IS BIGGER! You have to find some Courage!

Be determined to trust God even when there is nothing left in you, Psalm 6:8b-9. God has been there the whole time. God has been listening the whole time. Clouded by this calamity, it’s been hard seeing God in this, but God does not have to be seen to be trusted! Three times, “I know God has heard me!” “I know God has received me!” “I know God will answer!” GOD IS CLOSER! You have to find some Certainty!

Be determined to be free from the torment and terrorizing emotions and thoughts dragging you down, Psalm 6:10. Whatever David is up against he is confident God will see him through, God will make a way. GOD IS GREATER! You have to find some Confidence!

“We can ignore even pleasure. But pain insists upon being attended to. God whispers to us in our pleasures, speaks in our conscience, but shouts in our pains: it is his megaphone to rouse a deaf world.” —C.S. Lewis, The Problem of Pain

Conclusion

Our way often lies through a vale of tears, but there is One whom we can trust in the greatest straits and difficulties and who can dry our tears and stop our pains. To Him let us betake ourselves waiting upon Him in earnest prayer.