Atomic Week 2- Relationships
Notes
Transcript
WHAT? What are we talking about today?
VIDEO | A Clip of Something Being Crushed
INSTRUCTIONS: As a teaching tool, play a short clip (around 30 seconds or less) from a video like this one of objects being crushed by hydraulic pressure.
I don't know about you but sometimes I feel like one of those squished things in the video. Sometimes life comes with a lot of pressure, right? Over time, all that pressure can really drain you.
OBJECT LESSON | Energy Count
Every day, we wake up with a certain amount of energy. Once you actually wake up and start functioning like a real human, you've got a lot of energy to work with! But then the pressure begins. There's pressure to . . .
Pick out your outfit. Interact with your family without getting into a fight. Get out the door on time. Answer that text you've been putting off. What else drains your energy throughout the day?
INSTRUCTIONS: Bring out two buckets — make sure at least one of them is clear and filled with ping pong balls (or whatever you'd like). Put the clear bucket on a table where everyone can see it and place the other on the ground. The visible bucket represents the amount of energy you have to give in a day, while the hidden bucket represents the energy you extend in the day. Work with your students to list some of the things that drain your energy during the day. As you list each one, remove some of the ping pong balls from the visible bucket and dump them in the hidden bucket.
By the end of the day, you've given so much of your time and energy that you're left with only a tiny bit to give. As the day goes on, it makes sense you'd be a bit snappy with other people. For most of us, we probably have some bad habits when it comes to the way we treat other people. Especially when we're under pressure, we . . .
Get short-tempered.
Ignore people.
Put ourselves first.
Invest less in our relationships.
Our relationships have a big impact on our lives and faith. But when we fail to develop good habits when it comes to our relationships, we're missing out on a big opportunity to grow! So how can we develop better habits when it comes to our friends and family? That's what we're going to find out today.
SO WHAT? Why does it matter to God and to us?
QUESTION | "What would you do?"
Everyone has habits, even when you don't notice them. But sometimes when life hits us with a jolting experience, our habits are often revealed under pressure — especially the bad habits. Let's run through a few scenarios. For each one, answer this question: what would you do?
INSTRUCTIONS: After each scenario, give a few students a chance to respond or have every student share their response with the person next to them.
You're running late somewhere and someone is texting you. You know they want a quick answer back, but you're busy. What would you do?
You're having a hard time. Do you ask someone for help or spend time alone?
Something really painful just happened. A family member asks how you're doing. How do you respond?
A friend hurts or betrays you one day, but sends a friendly text the next day. What would you do?
High pressure situations can make or break our relationships. So what kinds of habits can we develop now so our relationships don’t break when we're under pressure?
SCRIPTURE | John 15:9-13
There's a moment in Scripture when Jesus speaks to His friends. He's under a lot of pressure and He knows His disciples are about to be under a lot of pressure too.
This conversation is captured by one of His disciples, John. Jesus has a lot to say to His friends in this passage because He knows the time is coming when He's going to die and His followers will face a huge crisis. To help prepare them for what's coming, Jesus talks about their friendships with God and each other. He even gives them a strategy to help strengthen their relationships with each other.
INSTRUCTIONS: Read John 15:9-13
“As the Father has loved me, so have I loved you. Now remain in my love. If you keep my commands, you will remain in my love, just as I have kept my Father’s commands and remain in his love. I have told you this so that my joy may be in you and that your joy may be complete. My command is this: Love each other as I have loved you. Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one’s life for one’s friends.
I don't know if you've ever thought of someone that's important to you and thought, "I would die for them," but that's the kind of commitment Jesus is encouraging us to make to each other.
But massive, dramatic, over-the-top displays of love aren't exactly what Jesus is talking about here. That's one way to love someone, but you can't really "make it a habit" to die for someone. That's something you can only do once, max. Instead, let's think about the little, almost invisible, "atomic" ways we can love each other. Because we can definitely make it a habit to love each other in small but powerful ways. We don't have to literally die for someone in order to make sacrifices for them. We can love one another with simple, everyday sacrifices.
VIDEO | A Clip from “A Boy Who Saved 17 Lives Gets a Big Surprise” (Soul Pancake)
Here's a powerful act of love that started with a small act of kindness.
INSTRUCTIONS: As a teaching tool, play a short clip (1:00-2:15) from “A Boy Who Saved 17 Lives Gets a Big Surprise” (Soul Pancake), where a boy named Virgil rescues 17 people from a hurricane.
Virgil Smith became a hero because of his investments in others.
When Virgil woke up that morning, he probably never imagined he'd be rescuing a friend, and then another friend, and a neighbor, and even a dog. But he did! Because of his investments in others, 17 people were saved. You might not end up doing something like Virgil did, but you have no idea the impact your investments in others now can impact their futures later.
SCRIPTURE | Ecclesiastes 4:9-12
A long time before Jesus arrived on earth, the biblical book of Ecclesiastes was written by a guy named Solomon, one of the wisest men to ever live. Let's see what he says about friendship.
INSTRUCTIONS: Read Ecclesiastes 4:9-12
Two are better than one,
because they have a good return for their labor:
If either of them falls down,
one can help the other up.
But pity anyone who falls
and has no one to help them up.
Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm.
But how can one keep warm alone?
Though one may be overpowered,
two can defend themselves.
A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.
The idea that we need each other isn’t new. God created us for relationships and the benefits are pretty amazing — and practical. When you've got a friend . . .
You have support. If you are alone and face a major challenge, defeat, or hurt, you're going to have a hard time handling it on your own. It might even be impossible. But when we're struggling to stand, the people we love can hold us up.
You have defense. We all need people in our corner — especially when life's pressures get the best of us.
OBJECT LESSON | Tripod
INSTRUCTIONS: Bring a camera tripod up front. Display the instability of one and two legs, then the stability of three legs. There's a reason this tripod has three legs.
If I only have one leg to the camera steady, it's going to fall over immediately. How about two? A little better, but still unstable. I can push it over with no problem. Now let's try three legs. Three legs hold the camera steady and provide a stronger defense against anyone trying to knock it over. We need relationships to keep us safe and supported when life gets difficult. But if we don’t make investing in our relationships a habit, those relationships may not be there when we need them.
We all have relationships, but there are some relationships we need more than others — like your inner-circle people. The ones who'll always answer your "I-need-someone-to-talk-to" texts. The people who have the biggest impact on your life and faith because of how much they invest in you. Scripture makes it clear we were created for relationships — with God and each other. In many ways, our relationships with others can have huge impacts on our relationships with God. Especially the relationships that are closest to us. So if you want to grow closer to God over time (and I hope you do), we need to take a look at the people we're growing closer to over time. If we want to be surrounded by people who support and defend us, in our lives and our faith, then let's
make it a habit to invest in our relationships.
make it a habit to invest in our relationships.
NOW WHAT? What does God want us to do about it?
DISCUSSION | "How can you invest in others?"
We really need each other! But remember our empty bucket at the beginning of this talk? If we're not careful, investing in our relationships can often come last. Investing in others might be easier to understand if we break it into these three words: time, communication, work.
TIME: You can invest in the people who matter to you by spending time with them — and not just when it's convenient for you.
COMMUNICATION: You can invest in them by being open, honest, and clear with your words.
WORK: You can invest in them by being willing to put in effort when things get challenging or they need you to support or defend them. So let's get specific. How does this actually work?
How are you supposed to invest in others?
INSTRUCTIONS: Lead this discussion by writing on a large chalkboard or whiteboard — embrace the science classroom aesthetic! Start by writing three words on the board: time, communication, and work. As students give ideas, write them under each category. If they give you ideas that don't fit in those categories, make a new category! When they share an idea, ask follow-up questions to get as specific as possible. For example, if they say "talk," ask, "About what? When? For how long?" Then write the result, like, "Ask someone how they're doing" or "send an encouraging text."
IMAGE | Habit Stacking
When I look at that board we just made, do you know what I see? Habits! A ton of them! Now let's see how we can stack those habits.
In case you missed it last week, habit stacking might sound like a weird idea, but it’s really easy and effective! All we need to do is follow a simple formula: "After/before I ____, I will ____." You already have a ton of habits that you do every day. If you want to add a new habit to your routine, an easy way to do it is to attach it to a habit you already do.
INSTRUCTIONS: Show the image provided in your Week 2 folder.
RESPONSE | Habit Stacking Blocks
So first, choose a habit you want to develop (maybe one from the board) and then try to attach it to a habit you already have. Let's think about those daily routines that would be great to start stacking from. Every day, maybe you . . .
Brush your teeth. Charge your phone. Take a shower — wait, do you all actually do that every day? Feeding your pet. Riding the bus to school. Doing homework. Opening TikTok. Eating dinner.
INSTRUCTIONS: Give every student three small connectable building blocks like these or these, along with a permanent marker. Invite them to write one habit they want to develop on one block, a habit they already have on the second block, and the word "transformation" on the third block. Do the same from the front with three jumbo building blocks, connect them in a sequence (with "transformation" on top), and share your own stack.
If your first block is your current habit (like getting on TikTok), and your second block is your new habit (like asking a friend how they're doing), what do you think the result might be?
What are some ways your relationships could be transformed if you invested in them more often? What kind of impact do you think you could make in someone's life when all of your small investments begin to add up? Remember, laying down your life for someone doesn't have to be a big grand gesture — small things are powerful too. What are some ways you could personally be transformed if you made it a habit to invest in others? Do you think you might become a little more kinder? More selfless? More compassionate? What are some ways your faith could be transformed if you invested in the right relationships? If you focused your investments on people who help you stick close with God, how might your relationship with God transform over time? Remember, Jesus said that when we obey His commands, we stay close to Him — and one of His commands is to love other people well. Last week, we saw that when you spend time with God consistently over time, you can't help but be transformed. That's what God's Spirit does. This week, let's think about how, when we invest in other people consistently over time, our relationships can't help but be transformed. So this week, give it a try — no matter who you've decided to invest in or how, let's make it a habit to invest in our relationships.