How Not to Live

Last week, we saw some great moments in the lives of Abraham, his servant, and his daughter-in-law to be, Rebekah.

They were walking in obedience as they lived out God’s plan in passing his promises on to the next generation.

Throughout our Genesis study, though, we have been seeing the contrast between God’s faithfulness and our flaws and failures.

Today, that is going to be abundantly clear.

In fact, this morning’s message is going to be all about how not to live.

However, as we see how flawed these people were, we are again going to be reminded of the faithfulness of God.

We are going to cover a lot of ground this morning as we do a quick survey of events in Genesis 25-28.

I would encourage you to keep a paper Bible with you and open this morning because we are going to jump from place to place.

Let’s set the stage. Jump in in Genesis 25:19-21.

From the outset, we see how closely God directed Isaac’s life to be parallel to Isaac’s.

In fact, that’s why we are going to be able to cover a lot today—there are so many similarities that they teach us many of the same points.

Through Moses writing these accounts, God reminds us that Rebekah came from the same region Abraham did, and just like Abraham and Sarah, Isaac and Rebekah struggled to have a child.

Isaac prayed for Rebekah, and God responded by allowing Rebekah to become pregnant.

Verse 26 lets us know that they waited about 20 years before God granted them children.

When they did, he saw fit to give them not one but two sons at once.

All is not well, though. Pick up in verse 22-23.

Rebekah doesn’t understand all that is going on, so she prays for God to help her find out what is happening.

The stage is set for a reversal of what we would expect.

God’s plan isn’t going to follow the normal pattern of the firstborn son as the one who carries the promise.

Instead, the older will serve the younger.

The struggle that began before they were born continues through their birth.

Read verses 24-26...

Jacob is grabbing at Esau’s heel from the literal moment he is born.

In verses 27-28, we see that Isaac and Rebekah each had a favorite son, but we will come back to that.

Let’s jump down and take out our first lesson on how not to live:

1) Care more about comfort now than God’s promises/rewards later.

For this story to make sense, you have to remember that in those days, it was common for the eldest son to receive a larger portion of the inheritance than the younger.

That was his birthright—the right to prominence and a larger inheritance.

Let’s read verse 29-34.

Jacob takes advantage of Esau’s hunger and convinces him to give up his birthright, which meant Jacob would now receive more of the inheritance.

We will see other examples of Jacob acting like this later, so let’s focus on Esau now.

While Jacob is definitely in the wrong for manipulating his brother like this, Esau displays a troubling trait: he cares more about comfort now than what was his later.

In fact, verse 34 makes it clear that Esau despised his birthright—he just didn’t care about it; he wanted something to eat.

Keep in mind what he just did. Odds are, he gave up half his inheritance for a bowl of soup and some bread.

This is the inheritance that God had blessed Abraham and Isaac with. God had made them wealthy, and Esau just gave up a tremendous amount of what God could have given him so he could have a bowl of soup.

We make this exchange so very often. We choose immediate gratification instead of long-term satisfaction.

Here’s a principle we sometimes forget: a lot of the time, sin is fun in the moment. There are a lot of sins that feel good and ease our discomfort or our pain, but when we choose sin, we always give up something in our relationship with God.

We miss out on the peace that comes from resting in him. We lose the joy of knowing that we chose to honor God even when we didn’t want to, and that one day he will reward it.

We damage ourselves and our relationships with other people because we look to things to fulfill us that never will.

That is why sin progresses like it does—it never satisfies for long.

How long do you think it was until Esau was hungry again? Maybe he made it until lunch the next day, but before long, he was hungry again and half his inheritance was gone.

That’s not a great way to live, is it?

Instead, we want to submit our desires to Christ and

Hebrews 12:2 CSB

keeping our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of our faith. For the joy that lay before him, he endured the cross, despising the shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God.

He endured the cross and all its shame to reach the joy of obeying the Father and reconciling the world to himself.

We need to do the same.

Esau didn’t, so he became a great example to us of how not to live.

He isn’t the only one, though. As we fast forward a bit in Isaac’s life, we learn another way not to live:

2) Repeat your parents’ failures.

Chapter 26 makes it clear that God is working in Isaac’s life in similar ways to what he did in Abraham’s.

Just like in Abraham’s day, there is a famine that Isaac endures.

Instead of going to Egypt, Isaac goes to Gerar, where the Philistines live. Abraham lived there for a while too.

God reiterated his promise to Isaac there at Gerar.

Like his dad, Isaac encounters Abimelech, the king of the Philistines.

In case you are wondering how old this guy must be, we believe that Abimelech is a royal title like Pharoah, so this probably isn’t the same guy. The title roughly translates as “Father of kings,” so this is their current leader.

However, here’s where Isaac does something interesting.

Pick up in verse 7...

Where have we heard this before? His dad, Abraham, said the same thing to an Abimelech before this one.

We have referenced this a few times, but keep in mind that there is a progression here.

When Abraham said that about Sarah, it was a half truth. It was still a lie, but Sarah was Abraham’s half-sister, so it had some basis in what was true.

What about Isaac and Rebekah? While they are related, they aren’t siblings, so this is a total lie.

You have heard it said that what the parents do in moderation the children will do to excess.

While that principle isn’t specifically taught in Scripture, we see it played out here.

Abraham told a half-truth, and Isaac told a total lie. Now, both their lies were to people outside the family, and some people might see that as different than lying to family.

Before we leave this morning, though, we are going to find Rebekah and Jacob lying to Isaac. Jacob’s sons will lie to him about the fate of their brother.

Abraham’s sin snowballed in the generations to come.

For us as parents, that is a warning to be careful for you in what you are modeling for your children—we will see that in a minute.

Here’s the thing, though: Your parents may have modeled sinful behavior, and you may be tempted to follow their example. However, you do not have to continue sinning like they did.

1 Corinthians 10:13 CSB

No temptation has come upon you except what is common to humanity. But God is faithful; he will not allow you to be tempted beyond what you are able, but with the temptation he will also provide the way out so that you may be able to bear it.

God is able, through his Holy Spirit, to change your heart away from that pattern so you say, “This stops with me and my generation.”

You don’t have to continue the pattern of adultery, divorce, alcoholism, pride, manipulation, or the like. It won’t be easy, but through the power of the Holy Spirit at work in you as you follow Christ, you can join with Joshua and say, “As for me and my house, we will serve the Lord.”

Isaac didn’t do that here, so he set an example for us of how not to live.

In the next chapter, he and Rebekah give us another clear example of how not to live as we watch the way they interact with their sons and...

3) Play favorites.

While Isaac and Rebekah had some great moments, one of their greatest failures was as parents.

Each parent had a favorite son. Flip back to 25:27-28.

Isaac loved Esau because he was a hunter and a man’s man, and Esau loved wild game. Jacob, on the other hand, was a homebody, and his mother favored him.

This carried through for the remainder of the boy’s lives and finds its clearest example in what happens in chapter 27.

Isaac is old and losing his sight. He doesn’t think he has a lot longer to live, so he wants to make sure he passes his blessing on to his favorite son.

Pick up in 27:1-4...

Isaac should have known better than to do this because of what God told Rebekah before the boys were born…the older was going to serve the younger.

However, since Esau was his favorite and had already given up his birthright, Isaac wanted to make sure he still received honor.

So Isaac cares more about his favorite son than doing what God says.

Rebekah isn’t doing any better, though. Pick up in verse 4-10.

She calls her favorite son and warns him that if he doesn’t do something quick, he is going to lose out.

While that is what God said would happen, this isn’t how he would have told them to go about securing the blessing and passing on the promise.

We will talk more about this in a minute, but let’s pause here and just focus on Isaac and Rebekah’s favoritism.

They both put their preferred son above what God said to do.

This causes major issues here. Jacob is going to have to flee and it will be 20 years before they see each other again.

Jacob and Esau are never fully reconciled, even though they do seem to put some of it behind them.

Not only that, but we will see that just like Isaac followed the pattern he saw in Abraham, Jacob is going to follow the pattern he sees in his mom and dad.

Jacob has twelve sons but plays clear favorites with Joseph which causes the brothers to hate Joseph so badly that they threaten to kill him and settle on selling him into slavery.

Dad, Mom, if God has allowed you to have more than one child, you cannot play favorites.

That doesn’t mean you treat them all the same way because each child has a different personality and different needs.

However, you should strive to communicate through your actions and your words that each child is loved to the same degree as their siblings.

Do not compare them to each other, don’t play them against each other, don’t give more to one than another whenever possible—make sure that each of your children knows they are valuable and cherished simply because they are your child, not because they are better than their sister at this or smarter or better looking than their brother.

Why? Because that’s how God loves us! He doesn’t love you more because you had your quiet time this morning or love her less because she is wrestling with a particular sin.

He loves you because he loves you! He loved you so much that he would die in your place and offer you forgiveness and eternal life, and as Romans 5 reminds us, that was while you were his enemy!

He loves you as his child, and that means he can love your physical children through you so they see you having that same kind of love for them.

Isaac and Rebekah had clear favorites, and it impacted their family for generations.

Don’t do that.

The last way we see in these chapters of how not to live is...

4) Lie to get what you want.

Rebekah proposed a plan to Jacob, and let’s see how Jacob responds in verses 11-12.

Jacob initially objects—because he is worried about getting caught.

He doesn’t seem to have any problem lying to his aging father who thinks he is dying; he is more concerned with getting cursed because his dad figured it out.

“Well, but didn’t God say the older will serve the younger?”

He sure did, but have you seen anything in these verses that indicates that Rebekah and Jacob were doing this out of a concern for what God said?

It is true that God will use their actions here to secure what he said would happen, but that doesn’t mean that they handled it correctly!

They lied to Isaac, putting on an elaborate ruse where Jacob dressed up in Esau’s clothes and fresh goat skins so he would be as hairy as Esau.

He lied to his dad, even dragging God into it when Isaac is surprised he is back so soon. Look at 27:20...

Despite his misgivings about what was going on, Isaac blesses Jacob thinking he is Esau.

Jacob runs out right as Esau is coming back with the game he killed and started preparing the meal, only to find that his brother lied and cheated his way into receiving his dad’s blessing.

Maybe this should go without saying, but this is not the way to live.

In fact, we see verses like Proverbs 31:7 where we are to pray for God to keep deception and lies far from us.

Jacob was a grown man, over 40 years old at this point—he should have stood up to his mother and stopped it.

Instead, he lied to get his way and gave us a great pattern of how not to live.

As the story continues, Esau holds a grudge against Jacob for his deception, and he intends to kill him as soon as Isaac dies.

Rebekah hears about his plan and convinces Isaac to send Jacob away to get a wife just like Abraham’s servant had gone to get Rebekah for Isaac.

Jacob leaves, and it will 20 years before he is back in the land God promised to Abraham and his descendants.

This has been tough, hasn’t it? All of these stories have been about manipulation, lies, favoritism, and pride.

It has been a crash course in how not to live, so is there anything good we see in all of this?

Where is God while all this is happening, and what is he doing?

I’ll show you.

Let’s round out our time this morning with a quick look at the events in the last half of chapter 28.

Jacob is running from Esau and headed to his uncle Laban’s house.

On his way, though, he has a very interesting encounter.

Look at 28:10-15.

At night, in a dream, Jacob sees a stairway that connects heaven and earth. He recognizes the Lord’s presence with him. God reaffirms the promises he has made to Abraham and his descendants, and he promises Jacob that God will go with him and bring him back in time.

Jacob, the heel-grabbing, manipulating deceiver, meets with God in a dream where he sees a connection between heaven and earth that no one in history had seen.

Beyond the obvious “cool factor,” Jacob realized this was a unique place where God’s people would experience his presence. Abraham had met with the Lord there, and Bethel would be where the Ark of the Covenant stayed through the time of the Judges.

The New Testament adds another layer to this, because Jesus seems to identify himself with the stairway that connects earth and heaven:

John 1:51 CSB

Then he said, “Truly I tell you, you will see heaven opened and the angels of God ascending and descending on the Son of Man.”

The deceiver was privileged to see what would one day be fulfilled in Christ.

Where our sin keeps us from being able to enjoy the presence of God and drives a wedge between heaven and earth, Jacob’s greatest descendant, Jesus, would come to earth and pay the penalty for sin to make a way for us to come to heaven through him.

The faithful God worked through his flawed people to continue his plan and keep moving toward redemption in spite of and through their failures.

Today, we can trust that this same faithful God is still working.

We can rest in the one who came to earth to open heaven to us through his own sacrifice.

We should strive to live for him, not like so much of what we see in these chapters.

We want to honor him, but we also rest in the truth that God knows what he is doing and nothing will stop his plan.

So don’t live like Isaac, Rebekah, Jacob, and Esau do in these chapters…but recognize that God is still working when you find that you have.

Trust in the God who showed himself faithful through it all.