The Marriage Model

Introduction

Well, good morning! I hope you’re ready to dig into God’s Word!

Listen, before we get started let’s recite our mission verse together. Remember we wanna “be a church without walls”…we wanna “deliver, disciple, and deploy”…and we wanna be a church that’s obedient to the Great Commission charge Jesus gave us. And so that, the verses, they’ll be on the screen. I’ll get us started. Matthew 28, verses 19 & 20:

Matthew 28:19–20 (ESV)

Go therefore and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, teaching them to observe all that I have commanded you. And behold, I am with you always, to the end of the age.”

[Prayer]

Alright, if you have a Bible and I hope that you do, open ‘em up with me to Genesis chapter two…Genesis chapter two. We’re gonna do our best to wrap up this chapter this morning and start moving a little faster through the book of Genesis as we make our way to chapter 11 this year. That’s where we’ll stop and take a break to look at some other sections of Scripture before we pick it back up next year.

But if you’ve been with us over the past two months, we’ve been looking at the creation narrative accounts…looking at the beginning where God created everything…and for the past several weeks we’ve been mainly focusing on the last thing God created…mankind…and how He placed special attention on man…He created them in His image…He created them with intentionality…He gave man purpose and meaning…He thoughtfully placed man…and literally gave man everything they needed to find real joy and satisfaction.

And listen, if you’ve been paying attention…that’s exactly what chapter two’s been all about…even though man’s separated from God…even though God created us with all these different limitations…we’re still made in His image and He’s still given us everything we need. And what we see through these accounts is that every good thing man experiences…it ultimately comes from God and it allows man to better reflect the image of God.

Listen, you guys know what I believe when it comes expository preaching. We’ve spent some time looking at it as a foundational element of the church. And while I believe its best to go through books of the Bible, chapter by chapter, verse by verse…that still doesn’t fully explain what expository preaching is. Listen, expository preaching is simply a practice of preaching that allows the biblical text to drive the sermon…the goal of expository preaching, its to identify the original meaning of the passage we’re looking at so that we can appropriately apply it to our lives today, right? And so listen, in order to accomplish that, we have to understand the original audience that Genesis was written to because Moses, he wrote this to the Israelites that were wandering around in the desert…He didn’t write it to us. Now, of course, because it’s inspired, God’s used it throughout the generations and it certainly still speaks to us today…but it’s important for us to understand that the meaning of God’s Word, it doesn’t change, right? And so, because of that, we have to put ourselves in these Israelites sandals if we’re truly gonna be able to understand the original meaning of what Moses is writing about here. You understand?

And listen, most of the time, when we come to this text, we immediately just apply it to the idea of marriage and we only consider this passage to give us application in that area. And guys, it does give us some applicational marriage points for sure…but there’s so much more here if we’d just put ourselves in these Israelites shoes. Listen, here’s these Israelites…they’ve just been freed from slavery…they were almost killed…they’ve been wandering around in the desert. Everything they knew was uprooted because all of ‘em were born in Egypt…and here they are wondering when this journeys gonna end and when something good’s gonna actually happen. And what Moses is reminding them of here is that God created them with a purpose…He’s placed them with intentionality…He’s given them everything they needed to live…and not just that....but if you remember how Moses opened up chapter two…everything good that we experience…the rest, food that’s good to the taste, things that are pleasing to the sight, our companionships (as we’ll see today), marriage…everything good…it comes from God and when we’re finding joy in those things (and partaking of those things in a godly fashion), it reflects the goodness of God in our life. This chapter, it’s a reminder to these complaining Israelites, to reflect on all the good things God’s given them and allow those things to reflect His glory to the world.

And so, of course when we come to our passage this morning, it is discussing the goodness of marriage…but not only that, it’s also showing how God gives us exactly what it is we need to find joy and fulfillment. We’re gonna see that man, we need companionship…we need, in some form or fashion, relationship with other people and with God. Of course, marriage is the picture Moses is using here. But listen, even those that aren’t believers…even those that completely reject God, they still understand the goodness that comes from things like marriage. That’s why we see all these Hollywood celebrities…they get divorce after divorce…only to find someone else to marry, right? And you’d think that after three or four marriages some of these guys and ladies, they would just stop…but here’s the deal, even in their ungodliness, they still see the goodness in something like marriage. Listen, that’s the point of Moses mentioning it here…Marriage was given to man because it’s good…and because ultimately, man needed it…but just like everything else we’ve looked at…there’s a spiritual meaning to this as well…mankind’s marriage relationship…it reflects the Trinity and it demonstrates God’s relationship with His people. And again, it shows man’s dependence on God…it reminds us that He’ll give us everything we need…and it reminds us that anything that’s truly godly…anything that’s good, it ultimately comes from Him.

And so, if you’re there with me…let’s stand together as we read…starting in verse 18. It says this:

Genesis 2:18–25 (ESV)

Then the Lord God said, “It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper fit for him.” Now out of the ground the Lord God had formed every beast of the field and every bird of the heavens and brought them to the man to see what he would call them. And whatever the man called every living creature, that was its name. The man gave names to all livestock and to the birds of the heavens and to every beast of the field. But for Adam there was not found a helper fit for him. So the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall upon the man, and while he slept took one of his ribs and closed up its place with flesh. And the rib that the Lord God had taken from the man he made into a woman and brought her to the man. Then the man said,

“This at last is bone of my bones

and flesh of my flesh;

she shall be called Woman,

because she was taken out of Man.”

Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh. And the man and his wife were both naked and were not ashamed.

Thank you, you can be seated.

Listen, there’s three questions I wanna ask you this morning…number one, do you recognize your need for companionship…number two, do you recognize God’s work in meeting our needs…and then finally, number three, do you recognize God’s image in all that’s good?

And so, with that, let’s jump into it.

1.) Do you recognize your need for companionship? (vv. 18-20)

Question number one…do you recognize your need for companionship?

Look back at verse 18 with me again. It says, “18 Then the LORD God said, “It is not good that the man should be alone.”

Listen, when we read through Genesis 1 and 2, the words here in this verse, they should hit us pretty hard. It’s a big deal. For the very first time, God says something's not good, right? He says, “It’s not good for man to be alone.”

I mean just think about that for a second…here’s this sinless man (because remember the fall hadn’t happened yet)…here he is in perfect fellowship with God, in this perfect environment (as we talked about last week)…I mean what more could man possibly need? Wasn’t everything we looked at last week enough for man? God gave him everything pleasing to the sight…He gave him everything that was good to the taste. But here’s God saying, “Nope, it’s still not good enough…man needs more!”

Verse 19, “19 Now out of the ground the LORD God had formed every beast of the field and every bird of the heavens and brought them to the man to see what he would call them. And whatever the man called every living creature, that was its name. 20 The man gave names to all livestock and to the birds of the heavens and to every beast of the field. But for Adam there was not found a helper fit for him.”

And so listen, check this out…here’s Adam, he’s all by himself…he’s a dude, he’s male…nothing looks like him…so God gives him this assignment of naming all these animals in the garden and they come two by two. And the Bible says, whatever name Adam gave it, that was it’s name. Again, he’s exercising that dominion God gave him here, right? God gave his image bearer the right to classify these animals. And so again, here’s Adam rattling off a bunch of names…and in our own minds, we can just see these animals coming up two by two. We can see the hippopotamus and then the elephant and then the cheetah. And listen, Adam sees a he rabbit and she rabbit…there’s a he bear and she bear…there’s a misses hippo and a mister hippo…He’s says, “You’re gonna be a doe…and you’re gonna be buck…and you’re gonna be a hen and you’re gonna be rooster…you’re gonna be a zebra and you’re gonna be a zebrett!”

And listen, I don’t know how smart Adam was…maybe he’s like most men today…but I’m sure after about 20 or 25 minutes…he has to take a step back and say, “Now, wait minute…there’s something wrong here…there’s some significant differences between them and me.” Adam may have been dense, but listen after you’ve named a few hundred animals and seen them come in pairs…he had to have gotten the point.

And listen, here’s what I think…God could’ve given Adam what he needed with a partner at the start…but I think he wanted Adam to recognize his need first, for himself…I think he wanted Adam to recognize his dependency on Him and then to expect God to give him what it is he needed, right? I think God was showing Adam, that he could’ve come to God with anything…He was demonstrating the kind of relationship He wanted with man…He was showing him that man was gonna lack for nothing.

But listen, regardless of how you interpret this passage, here’s what it still shows us…we were all designed for companionship. We were designed for relationship. And ultimately…its when two or more are together, that’s when God’s image is most reflected. And listen, this doesn’t just mean with marriage either. Of course, marriage is good and of course it’s what this passage is speaking about specifically but its when we gather together with any of God’s people that this truth is revealed.

Ecclesiastes 4:9 says:

Ecclesiastes 4:9 (ESV)

Two are better than one...

It’s why, in the New Testament...when Paul talks to the church about our bodies being temples…the words he uses for body, its plural…its when we gather together as the church…that we’re at our most complete.

That’s also why Jesus says in Matthew 18:20:

Matthew 18:20 (ESV)

For where two or three are gathered in my name, there am I among them.”

Now, does that mean that Jesus isn’t present with us individually? No…it just means that we were made for relationship with God’s people…and that when we’re together as God’s people, He’s better reflected to the world…because that’s our ultimate purpose for existing and being made in His image, right? It’s to reflect Him!

Now, of course…this is absolutely true in marriage as well. God created marriage as something to honor Him and to bring Him glory. And of course, we’ll see Him create woman a little differently than man and give her different responsibilities. We’ll see that in a moment…but here’s the point of these first several verses…is that its not good for man to be alone. Whether we admit it or not, we all long for companionship with other people. And because of that desire…we search for that void to be satisfied oftentimes in the world. And guys, we have to be careful here. I’m convinced that this is the one thing that gets us more in trouble than anything else…Listen, because we were created with this desire of companionship, we start searching to satisfy that desire outside of God’s Word and outside of God’s will. And these companionships…because they most allow us to reflect the image of God…they also have the greatest ability to pull us away from the presence of God. And guys, this is true in our marriages…in our friendships…in every relationship we choose to build. It’s why as a pastor, I won’t marry those that are unequally yoked…it’s because that relationship, it won’t amplify the image of God, it’ll just make it harder to reflect. And again, we care most about God’s image.

But guys, do you recognize your need for companionship this morning? Do you see how those desires have manifested themselves in your life? Do the relationships you have right now, do they magnify the image of God? Or listen, do they pull you further away from God?

2.) Do you recognize God’s work in meeting our needs? (vv. 21-23)

Which leads us into question number two…Do you recognize God’s work in meeting our needs? Or better yet…have you allowed God to determine the relationships you have in your life? Have you allowed Him to satisfy your desires? Have you let Him determine what’s good and beneficial for you?

Look back at verse 21 with me again. It says, “ 21 So the LORD God caused a deep sleep to fall upon the man, and while he slept took one of his ribs and closed up its place with flesh. 22 And the rib that the LORD God had taken from the man he made into a woman and brought her to the man. 23 Then the man said, “This at last is bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man.”

God created woman out of man…God determined what his companion would be. And listen, it the context of marriage, here’s what this passage is showing us…first, its that marriage is reserved for man and woman…that’s the design God gave marriage at the start, right? And as we’ll see in just a minute, its this kind of marriage that most reflects the image of God.

Second, we see that man and woman are separate…they’re completely different. Man’s charged with ruling creation while woman’s called to be his helper…we see this picture of leadership and submission…which also better reflects the image of God through their individual roles. But listen, while they’re separate, God takes woman from man’s rib to remind him that they’re also equals. He didn’t take woman from his head showing that she’d rule over him…and he didn’t take her from his feet showing she’d be some step stool. He took her from his side…showing that they were equals…two separate beings, created to come together to better reflect the image of God…we’ll talk about this oneness in just a moment.

But here’s the last thing this passage shows us…Eve was specifically and intentionally made for Adam and Adam for Eve. Meaning, for those of us that are married or planning to be married, your spouse or future spouse, they’re gifts from God. You were created specifically and intentionally for each other…and so the next time you get into a fight or an argument, remember that when you lose your patience with one another or get mad or whatever…you’re basically saying that what God gifted you specifically and intentionally, it wasn’t good enough. It’s for this reason, we’re against divorce as Christians…God gave us our spouse as gifts…gifts meant to satisfy our need for companionship. And your spouse, they complete you in the same ways Adam and Eve completed one another.

Listen, when Adam says, “This at last is bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh.” When he looked at the woman…he realized, “Wait a second, this isn’t anything like all the other animals I’ve seen.” He recognized immediately, that she was a part of him…and instinctively we see this longing he has for a reunion of whats been separated, right? It also shows his loneliness here…It’s almost as if he’s saying, “Finally, I have a companion…Finally, there’s someone for me!”

And when he first sees woman, Adam doesn’t actually name her Eve, he names her “Ishah” in the Hebrew which means “woman.” It comes out of the word “Ish,” which is the word for man. And what he’s doing, he’s distinguishing her from all the other animals he named. She’s a part of him…he’s showing his desire for her. He was pleased with what God made him and what God brought to him. We’ll see this more flushed out in just a second.

But what’s it mean for those of us that’s not married? Again, as a human being, we all long for companionship in some from or fashion. We were created for relationship with other people because when we come together in those relationships, we’re demonstrating the image of God in a greater way. And so, are we allowing God to meet our needs in these areas? Or listen, are we taking things into our own hands? Because just like we see with Adam’s needs here…whether He calls us to marry or to live a life of singleness…He will always give us what we need and He will purposefully place specific people in our lives to meet those needs. And so, are you allowing Him to satisfy those human desires you have for companionship?

Let me get a little more specific…because I don’t think its a coincidence that Paul relates marriage to the relationship Christ has with the church in Ephesians 5. We’re the bride of Christ…and because we believe God’s sovereign and because we believe God’s purposeful…we don’t believe anyone’s here by chance. If this is your church…if God’s called you to First Baptist Church…what companionships…what relationships do you have here that are helping to complete you or edify you or grow you closer to Christ? Because listen, that’s what God does in meeting our needs in this area? We’re all in the same marriage as children of God when it concerns the church…and we need godly companionships that push us closer to Christ? That’s what ultimately satisfies us as Christians…That’s why He instituted the church and brought us together. Now, that doesn’t mean we don’t have relationships with those outside the church, I’m just simply saying that God’s brought us together for companionship…for fellowship…because just like in marriage, it’s when we’re together…working together, that He’s most reflected through us.

And so, do you recognize God’s work in meeting your needs for companionship? Do you see how He’s done that by bringing you to FBC? Are you taking advantage of the companionships He’s placed in your lives here at FBC…in this marriage He’s called us to together? I mean if you’re honest, what kind of relationships do you have with others here outside of Sunday morning?

I couldn’t tell you how many conversations I’ve had with people that aren’t satisfied or content with the relationships they have…they want that significant other…or they want that best friend and they just can’t seem to find satisfaction. They’re just so lonely…Listen if that’s you, I promise, you’ll find fulfillment in this area, when you turn towards God and His church. Because again, you were called to a spiritual marriage, and look around…these are the people that you’re committed to. God gave us each other, because its meant to satisfy our desire for relationship.

Listen, when you see your need for companionship, just like with Adam, you have to let God meet that need for you. Going back to last week, that’s what it means to live dependent on God. It’s recognizing that He’s the only One that can meet our needs. Just like with marriage…creating it for male and female…giving them separate roles…He defines companionship in the same ways for us. He meets those needs. Do you recognize that? Are you letting Him work in your life?

3.) Do you recognize God’s image in all that is good? (vv. 24-25)

Question number three…Do you recognize God’s image in all that’s good?

Let’s look at verse 24 and 25 again: “24 Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh. 25 And the man and his wife were both naked and were not ashamed.”

Moses writes, “Therefore!”…Listen, because Adam saw Eve as bone of his bone and flesh of his flesh…because he saw her pleasing, they’d become one, right? Of course, it’s talking about the two coming together, making a marriage covenant with one another…before God (we see that with the use of the word “wife”)…and through that marriage relationship, them becoming “one,” it would seal the deal. That oneness, it involved the two coming together sexually. That’s why it says that man and woman were both naked and unashamed. In fact, it’s showing man’s pleasure here. She was bone of his bone, flesh of his flesh and it pleased him so much that he wanted to unite what had been separated physically. They became one.

Now, going back to the first parts of this verse…it’s a little confusing here when it says, “a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife.” Adam and Eve, they were created, they had no father or mother…but again, we have to remember the context here…the people Moses is writing to…we have to remember what Moses’ purpose in chapter two was…we’re completely dependent on God. We were made of dust…we were given the breath of life…it was God that gave us food and water…He gave us things pleasing to the sight…it was God that satisfied our desires for companionship. But He did those things, because ultimately we were made in His image…and our satisfaction and our joy allows us to better reflect that image, right? Everything good in our lives ultimately reflects the image of God. I mean think about the beginning of chapter two…rest…it was created for our benefit…because ultimately when we’re finding rest in Him, finding real joy and satisfaction…it reflects His image, right? Or think about the rivers and the food He provided…the tree of life…now we see marriage…everything good…when properly performed…it reflects the image of God.

And so, when we get to this idea of marriage…the closest bond of human companionship…Moses says, “a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife.” Meaning, man and woman, they have to let go of what they knew before…what they depended on…what provided them comfort and security…and make each other the priority…That word “cleave” it means to stick to one another…they’re to shift their obligations and loyalties from their families to each other…because ultimately its this kind of companionship that truly satisfies our needs in this area…but also, it’s when a man and wife come together as one that allows them to best reflect the image of God and it allows them to demonstrate the relationship that God wants with us, right? Although they’re two separate people…with different roles and responsibilities…they come together equally, with one purpose. We see a picture of the Trinity through marriage. The Trinity of God: the Father, the Son, the Holy Spirit…they’re in perfect union with one another and completely satisfied in their relationship with one another alone. And of course, as Paul mentions in Ephesians, we see a picture of the relationship between Jesus and the church. Marriage is a reflection of the same kind of intimacy that Christ wants with us. It’s a picture…a reflection. And just like man and wife are to leave and cleave…man is to leave this world and cleave to Christ.

But listen, just like with everything else mentioned in chapter two…marriage is good…it fills a need that man has for companionship…it allows the goodness of God to be reflected…and ultimately, it demonstrates man’s dependency on God to provide for them…to give them what they need. And just like with rest, and food, and water…this marriage…it’s just as pleasing to man’s senses. Go read the Song of Solomon. Marriage is a very pleasing thing…of course, physically and emotionally…it meets our need for relationship…it meets our need for security…it meets our need for intimacy (sexually and spiritually)…you understand what I’m saying? Chapter two’s all about God giving man everything they needed to find real joy and satisfaction and even pleasure.

God created this world for us…He intentionally made it in the way He did to bring us joy…to give us a place we’d be excited about. I mean that’s the picture Moses has been giving us…that’s the picture we see of the world before the fall in chapter three. Listen, when you become a Christian, God doesn’t try and rob you of your happiness or your joy…He wants those things for you…but listen, that goodness, the things He wants you to experience…all the things that bring you joy, it should ultimately reflect His image. It should point back to Him…You understand? The things that bring you happiness and joy, they should reflect Him.

And so, does your life, does the things that bring you happiness…are the things you’re fighting to give your time too or your resources or your attention…do these things reflect the image of God? Because listen, if they don’t…are they truly things that are good? Do they truly come from God? Do they honor God? Does it truly demonstrate the dependency you should have for Him to satisfy those desires in your heart? Or listen, are you just determining what’s best for yourself? Because as we’ll see next week, that’s exactly what leads to man’s demise.

Israel…as they’re wandering around in this wilderness…complaining, trying to take things into their own hands…Moses is reminding them that goodness is given…its defined by God. He’s saying don’t be like Adam…don’t be like Eve…don’t squander what God’s given you. Choose life.

Guys, when defining what’s good in your life…whether its a relationship…whether its something we take into our bodies like food or drink (like pictured in chapter two)…whether its how we manage our time and practice the idea of rest…maybe its how we steward our resources or the things we care about....when defining what’s good, do we define goodness by how well it reflects the image we’re meant to reflect? Because just like marriage, just like how it reflects that image…what we enjoy…what comes out of us…what we partake in…the people we place around us…everything about us…our roles, responsibilities…the way we rule and steward…everything…it has the ability to point others to God or pull them further away.

Guys, the marriage model that God gives us here…obviously, its something we can live by…obviously, it’s showing us what marriage should look like…but it’s just another reminder that everything that’s good…it comes from God…and guys, everything that’s good, it has the ability to reflect His image to those around us.

And so, do you recognize God’s image in all that’s truly good?

Closing

Every head bowed and every eye closed.

Guys, as you look at your life…what brings you happiness? What brings you joy? What do you invest in? Are those things…are they defined by the goodness of God? Do they reflect His image? Did He ultimately give these things to you? I mean examine every area of your life…think about your need for companionship? Have you surrounded yourself with people that point you God? Are you truly involved…are you truly apart of this marriage relationship here at FBC? Because ultimately this is what God’s given you…its where He’s placed you? How are you cultivating relationships outside of Sunday morning with your brothers and sisters here?

Listen, for some of you…what you need to do…you need to finally commit to us…you need to join us in membership…you need to come alongside of us as we build each other up to become more and more like Christ. You need to embrace what it is God’s given you and recognize where he’s placed you and nourish the relationships He’s brought you too.

For others, you need to find ways to invest yourself more into the people here at FBC. Maybe its getting involved in Sunday school or Home groups…maybe its a KNOT Group, to pour your life into someone else’s…maybe you need to just invite another person or another family into your home for dinner or lunch or whatever…you need to start getting to know each other. This is your family…we’re to cleave to one another just like we do with Christ…because we’re all connected to the same vine.

Or listen, maybe you’re good…maybe you’re doing your part to build up the body of Christ…maybe you recognize what God’s given you, your dependency on Him…maybe you know how to define goodness. And so, how can you teach that to others? How can you reach people on the fringes? How can you bring them into this body…to teach them these same things?

Guys, God’s given us everything we need to find joy, and happiness, and pleasure…He’s met every need we have in our lives. Are we depending on Him to give us those things? Are we depending on Him to define those things? Because if we keep going down this road where we define it for ourselves, it’ll lead to our demise. We have to reorient our life…we have to leave this world behind and we have to cleave to Jesus. We have to depend on Him to give us what it is we need.

And listen, if you’re here this morning…and you’ve never turned to Jesus or placed your trust and faith in Him…you’ll never truly find this joy and satisfaction we’re talking about. You can’t! Because ultimately, it’s only found in Him. It’s only experienced when you depend on Him for everything…it’s when you recognize Him for who He is…when you see your need for Him. That’s what leads to life!

In these accounts, here in Genesis…we see God created everything…He gave man everything they needed…they walked with Him in a very real way…but the Bible says they rebelled. We’re gonna talk about that next week. They wanted things their way. And guys, its the same for us today… that rebellion, that sin, it divides us from God…and because of that divide, we brought death and punishment on ourselves. But listen, the Bible’s all about God’s plan to redeem us. It says, He sent His Son, Jesus, to restore us. He lived a life we couldn’t…a perfect life…and He went to a cross where He wore the weight of our sin…He took on our punishment…He died…experiencing the death made for you and for me. He was our sacrifice…all of God’s wrath, it was poured out on Him so that we wouldn’t have to experience that at the judgement seat of Christ. And the Bible says that He rose three days later to prove to us that He is exactly who He says He was. And it says that when we repent and when we believe. When we ask for forgiveness and turn to Him…when we believe that He is the Son of God and that He did those things, He saves us. He restores us. He gives us His Spirit…He changes us…He gives us what we need to depend on Him all over again. It’s our second chance. And so, guys, repent…believe. Place your trust and faith in Jesus.

And so listen, Wendy’s gonna play…this is your time…whatever you’re struggling with right now, you come…if you need to pray to reorient your life…to place dependence back on God…you come you ask God to give you the things you need to do that…if it’s salvation and you want Jesus to change everything for you…you come and you let Him do that for you this morning…if its just simply to come and to pray…again you do that. This is your time, I’ll close us in just a few minutes…you come!

[Prayer]