My Story III
Notes
Transcript
Handout
Turn to 1 Peter 5. Continue with my story and this is probably the last one. Next week a little shorter service to make room for the Annual Meeting. We move into Palm Sunday and Easter, then we’ll move into sermons.
Review from last week:
1) There is no such thing as a secret sin. Sin is a relational issue and always effects the relationships around us (sin always separates).
2) God is “powerless” against unconfessed sin. But Satan is powerless against confessed sin.
As I talk about my story, I want you to know this is not only my story.
This is God’s story.
In the midst of my story, in the midst of my failures and successes there is a God who redeems, redirects, restores and celebrates.
Likewise, you who are younger, be subject to the elders. Clothe yourselves, all of you, with humility toward one another, for “God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble.”
Humble yourselves, therefore, under the mighty hand of God so that at the proper time he may exalt you,
casting all your anxieties on him, because he cares for you.
Be sober-minded; be watchful. Your adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour.
Resist him, firm in your faith, knowing that the same kinds of suffering are being experienced by your brotherhood throughout the world.
And after you have suffered a little while, the God of all grace, who has called you to his eternal glory in Christ, will himself restore, confirm, strengthen, and establish you.
To him be the dominion forever and ever. Amen.
Susan and I married in 1995. Within four years, our marriage was in jeopardy. We were struggling. I left the ministry in June of 2000. We left the Nazarene church in Ohio. We were hurting and desperate for help, felt alone. The DS said go to a marriage counselor. We didn’t. Though the church abandoned us, God didn’t. He sent a man named Dwight Johnson who became my spiritual mentor and father. He loved me, prayed for us, and mentored me. He helped me become the man I was supposed to be.
Susan and I were desperate to make our relationship work, but we were not sure what to do. So, we tried something crazy. We decided to do marriage God’s way – according to the Scriptures. Not saying it was easy, because it wasn’t, but that’s what we did. We prayed, we read the Scriptures, and then we did what it said.
When God says forgive – He means it. When God says husbands love your wives as the Christ loves the church, He means it. It’s not a suggestion. So, husbands, you should be asking how would Jesus love my wife. When God says husbands treat your wives as the weaker vessel, which means precious and valuable, He means it. When He says clothes yourselves with love, compassion, kindness, gentleness … He means it.
For four and a half years we tried to do marriage our way. Didn’t work. But when we humbled ourselves under God’s Word, God’s authority, and obeyed the Scriptures, and after we had suffered a little while, He began to lift us up and restore, strengthen, and establish us. And the greatest Marriage Counselor of all time did in our marriage what no human counselor could ever do.
So, there’s a lesson here, and it’s not just for married people.
God’s way is always better than our way.
Pride says the opposite – God opposes that. What might the Spirit be saying to you right now? Got an area in your life where you’re doing it your way and it’s not working?
As I mentioned earlier, I left the ministry and we moved to Sparks, NV. Didn’t want anything to do with the Nazarene church. We were avoiding Nazarenes, but God is sneaky but ended up at a Nazarene church (church plant). We met people who were messy like us, on the journey like us, and they loved us and helped us. Our marriage began to mend In August of 2001 I reenlisted in the Army National Guard. The following month was 9-11 and I found myself back in fulltime military.
During this time, God was really working on our marriage and we’re drawing closer. Not easy – had some blow ups, but even in those God was working. One day, Dwight said, “Chad, if you want a truly Biblical marriage, then no secrets between you and Susan. Don’t let anything come between you and Susan.” What does Scripture say?
‘Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife,
and the two shall become one flesh.’ So they are no longer two but one flesh.
What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate.”
Because you can’t become one if something is separating. No secrets. And that’s what we began to put into practice. Over time, God revealed something that was a serious hindrance to our relationship (me and God, me and Susan). God had forgiven me – no doubt. Susan and others had forgiven me, but there was one person left that needed to forgive me, but they were holding out, and this person refused to forgive me.
Unforgiveness creates wedges in relationships.
Forgiveness is critical to the Christian life. If we can’t forgive, then we’re not Christlike. I’ve heard it said that we are most like Christ when we forgive. After all, isn’t forgiveness, one of the main reasons Jesus died.
So, who was withholding forgiveness from me? Me. I had yet to fully forgive myself. I wrestled with this for years because it wasn’t fair that Jesus, who never sinned died on the cross so I the worst of sinners could be forgiven! What’s fair about that? Nothing!
It’s a good thing God is not fair, because if He was fair, then we would get what we deserve. I wrestled with this for years. Somehow, I had to pay for my sin. There had to be something I could do to make it right, but nothing worked.
In God’s system, our efforts to earn forgiveness never work. Forgiveness must be received through faith.
And the only way to be forgiven is through the shedding of blood (Heb. 9). But I just couldn’t forgive myself and that’s called pride, and pride causes problems in relationships.
One night at a Bible study, the leader began reading Romans 5, and the Spirit started ….
Therefore, since we have been justified by faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ.
I’m like what … it’s starting to click. Then verse 6.
For while we were still weak, at the right time Christ died for the ungodly.
but God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.
Jesus began to show me, “Chad, I was there. I died for that. Believe me, I nailed that sin to the cross. You are forgiven.”
For the first time, I forgave myself, even though it’s not fair. Fair? You know what’s not fair? It’s not fair to Jesus to not forgive ourselves.
The lack of our own forgiveness communicates that what Jesus did on the cross wasn't enough.
Can you look Jesus in the eyes and say …? He loves us so much. That’s what the cross is for, so use it. Just forgive yourself and let Jesus worry about what’s fair. And for the first time, I could sing, “My sin, oh the bliss of this glorious thought, My sin, not in part, but the whole, Is nailed to the cross, and I bear it no more, Praise the Lord, praise the Lord, It is well with my soul!”
What’s the Lord saying to you this morning?
After about 3 years there, we relocated to Flagstaff, AZ where I served as a NG recruiter. Once again, we tried to avoid those Nazarenes, but God is sneaky, and we ended up in a Nazarene church. I guess God wants us to stay. I’m a little slow sometimes.
I enjoyed the military and I planned to do my 20 years. I missed fulltime ministry as well, but I was fully convinced that I would never be a pastor again. I would never have a District License or be ordained. Even though I had accepted God’s forgiveness, I was absolutely convinced that God was done with me, so why even bother allowing myself to dream of the possibilities that maybe, just maybe, God wasn’t done.
In 2006, I took a walk down our dirt road. Praying, and very unexpectedly God said, “It’s time.” That’s all He said, but I knew in my heart what He meant. I couldn’t believe it.
I said, “God, I believe you, but you’ll have to talk to Susan. I can’t. She’s made it clear – she doesn’t want us back in ministry.” Exactly two weeks later, Susan comes to me and says, “I’ve been thinking. God’s been speaking. I think it’s time to go back into ministry.” Shortly after that, I got my local license, then my District license. In 2008, moved to Oregon as a fulltime youth pastor. Then ordained in 2012.
There’s a lesson here.
God is a God of restoration!
God restored a broken man – he restored a broken marriage - a broken ministry - and a broken pastor. If God can restore someone like me … just think of what He can do for you!
As the worship team comes up, we’re going to close with two songs – not to manipulate, but to give you time assimilate and respond. Let me read 1 Peter again. And any time during these closing songs if anything from the message resonated with you, come to the altar.
1 Peter 5:5–11 Clothe yourselves, all of you, with humility toward one another, for “God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble.” Humble yourselves, therefore, under the mighty hand of God so that at the proper time he may exalt you, casting all your anxieties on him, because he cares for you. And after you have suffered a little while, the God of all grace, who has called you to his eternal glory in Christ, will himself restore, confirm (make capable), strengthen, and establish you. To him be the dominion forever and ever. Amen.