Three Habits of a Contagious Christian - Part 2
Three Habits of Highly Contagious Christians [Part Two]
We’re in a series on habits of highly contagious Christians. We looked at habit number one last week — that we’re going to develop relationships with people far from God. This morning we’re going to talk about the second habit which has to do with sharing a verbal witness, explaining the gospel to somebody, telling people how it is that they can become a Christian.
It’s about how to have a conversation with a seeking person about God; to help another human being actually cross over from death to life. When Jesus would do that, it was nourishing to him. He said to his followers one time after he did that, that it was like his food. "My food is to do the will of the Father," he said. It fed his soul like food feeds our bodies.
And I think that’s true for most of Jesus’ followers. I’ve seen it over and over again. I don’t think there’s any exhilaration in the whole world quite like the feeling that comes for a Christ-follower when you actually help another human being find God, help somebody who was lost become found. That’s like spiritual adrenaline.
Now some of you have the ability to do this — to share a verbal witness, to explain the gospel. Some of you have the ability to do this with creativity and ease and confidence. I want to tell you one of my favorite stories about a spiritual conversation held with a seeker that was done with amazing skill.
This conversation was done by a pastor named Jeffery Kotter. He was on a plane one time, and he was in blue jeans and a T-shirt. A business guy sat down next to him and explained about his job. He was in the figure salon business with a national organization, very proud of his work. Kotter writes, "I nodded approvingly as this man talked and thought, ‘Impressive, proud of his work and accomplishments.’
And I thought to myself…..Why can’t Christians be proud like that? Why are we so often apologetic about our faith and our church? Looking askance at my clothing, this businessman asked me the inevitable question, ‘And what do you do?’ The Spirit began to brood over the face of the deep. Order and power emerged from chaos. A voice and a whisper reminded me, ‘Let him who boasts, boast in the Lord.’
"’It’s interesting that we have similar business interests,’ I said. ‘You are in the body changing business. I am in the personality changing business. We apply basic, theocratic principles to accomplish indigenous personality modification.’ He was hooked, but I knew he’d never admit it. Pride is powerful.
"’You know, I’ve heard about that,’ he said hesitantly, ‘but do you have an office here in the city?’ ‘Oh yes, we have many offices. We have offices up and down the state. In fact, we’re national. We have at least one office in every state of the union, including Alaska and Hawaii.’
"He had this puzzled look on his face. He was searching his mind to identify this huge company he must have read or heard about, maybe in the Wall Street Journal. ‘As a matter of fact,’ I said, ‘we’ve gone international. And management has a plan to put at least one office in every country of the world by the end of this business era.’ I paused. ‘Do you have that in your business?’
"’Well no, not yet,’ he answered. ‘But you mentioned management. How do they make it work?’ ‘It’s a family concern. There’s a Father and his Son, and they run everything.’ ‘That must take a lot of capital,’ he said, skeptically. ‘You mean money?’ I said, ‘Yeah, I suppose so. No one knows just how much it takes. But we never worry because there’s never a shortage. The boss always seems to have enough. He’s a very creative guy. And the money is, well, just there.
"’In fact, those of us in the organization have a saying about our boss. He owns the cattle on a thousand hills.’ ‘Oh, he’s into ranching too?’ asked my captive friend. ‘No, it’s just a saying we use to indicate his wealth.’ My friend sat back in his seat musing over our conversation. ‘What about with you?’ he asked.
"’The employees? They are something to see,’ I said. ‘They have a Spirit that pervades the organization. It works like this: The Father and Son love each other so much that their love filters down through the organization so that we find ourselves loving one another, too. I know this sounds old-fashioned in a world like ours, but I know people in the organization who are willing to die for me. Do you have that in your business?’
"I was almost shouting now. People were starting to shift noticeably in their seats. ‘Not yet,’ he said. Quickly changing strategies, he asked, ‘But do you have good benefits?’ ‘They’re substantial,’ I countered with a gleam. ‘I have complete life insurance, fire insurance, all the basics. You might not believe this, but it’s true. I have holdings in a mansion that’s being built for me right now for my retirement. Do you have that in your business?’ ‘Not yet,’ he answered, wistfully."
The light was dawning, and then Kotter goes on to write about a very significant spiritual conversation that continued between a Christ-follower and a seeker.
I love that story. Some of you have naturally strong gifts in this area of evangelism, and you’re very comfortable having spiritual conversations like this. Those of you that do, you need to cultivate that gift; you need to develop it, and you need to use it on a regular basis. This church needs you to just run as far with that gift as God enables you to do.
But many of you in this room are much more like me. This is not a strong area of natural giftedness for me. I don’t find brilliant, creative analogies just flowing off my lips in moments like that on airplanes. Sharing my faith is much more like the experience I have when I argue.
It’s often not until I wake up at 2:00 in the morning do I think of the perfect thing I wished I would have said.
And saying the word of Homer Simpson is known for ……"Duh!"
Well, I want to minimize the "duh" factor in spiritual conversation this morning. Because you know what? I do not want to miss the exhilaration that Jesus experienced in pointing people towards the Father.
Man, I don’t want to miss that, and I don’t want you to miss that either, not one of you. What we talk about this morning is a very important point — this step, this habit, the second habit. I think that this habit, sharing a verbal witness, is often the missing link in most churches. And here’s why it’s crucial.
You may develop relationships with unchurched people. That’s habit number #1.
You may invite them to church events. We’ll talk about that more next week. That’s the third habit.
But if you don’t work at this step, if you don’t engage people far from God in significant, spiritual conversations, if you don’t give them a chance to question and probe the gospel in a one-on-one setting, sooner or later they’re going to drop out.
They just will. Most of them just will. We need to be real clear on this.
City Church will not achieve its mission; you and I as a church body, as a Community, we will fail to do what God has caused us to do if you………..
if you one by one and life by life don’t own and master this habit that we talk about this morning, the habit that contagious Christians have had for thousands of years. The stakes are that high.
So I want to get painfully practical. We’re going to roll up our sleeves and get real practical here.
Now I want to talk about this business of sharing a verbal witness, of explaining the gospel. I want to talk about it in four steps, and I’ll give you one word for each of those steps. If you want to write them down, I invite you to do that.
I didn’t even know this. I didn’t see this till I got into the study of it….but if you take the first letter of each one of these words, they spell the word "idea."
So, if that helps you to remember it, that’s fine.
But the first word is the word INITIATE.
Look for opportunities to steer the conversation towards spiritual topics. As you’re relaying to people who are far from God, look for opportunities to steer the conversation towards spiritual topics.
Now the single most effective way I know how to do this is to ask questions. In the course of getting to know people, the most natural thing we do is ask questions. "What do you do for a living?" "Where are you from?" "Tell me about your family." As you do this, you can ask, "Tell me about your spiritual background." Or, "What do you think about spirituality?" Or, "When you were growing up, what did you learn about God?"
Now, if the other person is not a Christian, you don’t have to jump in and correct them right away because this is just the beginning of the process. But when you ask questions like that, very often they’ll return the favor. They’ll ask you about your spiritual commitment. That will give you a chance to tell your story.
There’s another way to initiate spiritual conversations. Look for opportunities around certain topics.
For example, this may not have occurred to you before. One topic people love to talk about that offers a lot of chances to turn very naturally to spiritual subjects is movies.
Any of you remember a movie called "Ghost"? It’s about when a dead guy came back to Demi Moore. Well, I remember having a number of conversations with people over what happened in the movie, "What do you think really happens to people when they die? What do you think is going to happen to you? And who informed you about your opinion? Do you have a good authority for that?"
There’s a movie that’s out currently, I have a friend that just saw it and talked to me about it a few days ago called "The Long Green Mile." Miracles play a prominent role in this movie. I haven’t seen it, but apparently they do. You could ask somebody who has seen it, "What do you think about miracles? Do you think they really are possible? Do you think there really is more to life?"
My wife Nancy will often ask people what they think of Kevin Costner. It doesn’t lead to anything spiritual; she just likes to talk about Kevin Costner.
And there are a number of other potential spiritual conversation starters.
You may be talking about parenting. You can ask another person, "What kind of spiritual influences do you want your children to have?" People are real concerned about their kids these days.
You can use a message topic. For instance, if you were here at church this last weekend, you might say in a conversation with a friend, "You know, at my church last week, the pastor talked about getting the need for us to have significant relationships in our lives. Outside the church and outside the home.
Do you think that’s possible? Where do you look for those kinds of relationships?"
Just use a topic that you just heard about here at the church.
If you’re talking to someone that reads much, you might ask them, "What book have you read that most influenced you and why?"
And almost always, at least in my experience, after talking a little bit, they’ll ask back to me, "What book has most influenced you?" And then the simplest thing is just to say the Bible. And again, they’ll ask why.
Sometimes you’re talking with somebody who’s in a crisis. People will often open up to the gospel in a time of crisis. And then you might ask them, "Do you have anything by way of spiritual support in your life?"
You might be talking about hobbies with somebody, and you could include church activities when you’re just talking about hobbies. "On weekends I do I serve coffee and park cars."
And they’ll probably want to know about that "parking cars" thing, or whatever area of church service that you’re involved in.
Maybe marriage or relationships will be a bridge topic. For instance, if you share struggles that you and the other person have had in marriages, you might say, "My wife and I had a hard time communicating. Let me tell you what we really found out." And then talk about a time when you found help through the church, through God’s community.
Or if you’re single, you might say, "I found a great place to develop significant friendships."
And somebody who is single is probably going to be curious about that.
People talk about business a lot. Maybe the most common question that folks ask each other is, "What do you do?"
One response to that has just a little more of a risk factor, but it can get you into a spiritual conversation. Say, "Well, I have one job that I get paid for, and I have one job at my church that I do for free. Which one would you like to hear about?"
Then you have an opportunity, if they choose number two, to talk about the way that you serve God, serve the Body.
Holidays offer an opportunity to get into spiritual conversations. At Christmastime you might ask somebody, "What do you really think about Christmas? Do you really think that baby born in a manger was really God?"
Or with Easter coming up in a few months, "What do you think about Easter? Do you think there really was someone that came back from the dead?"
You can be creative with this stuff. The main thing that I want to say on this initiating business is that you open yourself to the guidance of the Holy Spirit to be praying about this a lot.
Listen for promptings. Allow the Spirit to whisper to you because the Spirit really will guide you. And when that happens, you obey and take the risk.
We talked about this last week. There is an unbreakable connection between spiritual formation and evangelism. And if you’re walking in the Spirit, Christ is being formed in you, and the Spirit will lead you into spiritual conversations with seekers. And if you’re really trying to explain the gospel to people, you won’t be able to do that well without the Spirit’s help. It’s a partnership deal. That’s the first word — initiate.
Then the second word is the word "DISCERN."
Discern what the other person’s level of interest is. You can put this in terms of the law as supply and demand.
I need to engage the other person’s demand level. What’s the level of interest this other person is showing in spiritual things? Then I need to adjust the supply — how much I say — to fit the level of demand that that seeking person has.
Here’s why this is important: Sometimes people get so fired up about doing evangelism they violate this law, the law of supply and demand.
They start talking longer and faster and giving more information than the listener wants, just dumping a lot of stuff. And this can actually set the whole process back.
You’ve got to discern the level of interest, and if it’s low, back off. Let me get painfully clear on this. Some of you aren’t real sure how to read cues.
If while you’re talking the other person’s eyes are growing glazed and their pupils get fixed and dilated; you may want to assume that you are supplying more than demaned
if you find that you have grabbed their arm with your hand, and you’re physically restraining them from walking away while you’re talking, that could be a clue that their interest might be flagging in what it is you’re saying.
Discern the level of interest of the other person. I had a friend that I invited come to the Christmas Musical we did in Grand Rapids.
When I saw this person the next time, we had a conversation. One of the questions I asked was, "Tell me what you thought. What was it like?" There was a long pause, and then this person said, "That was a good show." Then they changed the subject.
Now my first thought was, "That wasn’t a show! That was a service of worship and proclamation. Don’t you have any spiritual sensitivity at all?" But see, this person doesn’t have any other categories yet. This person doesn’t even have those categories. This is the only category they have.
So I said, "That was a good show, wasn’t it?" The level of demand there is not high yet. And it’s going to take time for that person. That’s okay.
Now on the other hand, sometimes the other person is really motivated. They really are interested. On those occasions, keep providing opportunities for discussion. Keep putting more fuel on the fire, answer questions. Tell them you’ll get back to them about things they don’t know.
I heard once some really good advice about this.
When you leave someone who’s interest level is high, then say, "The next time we get together, let’s talk about some other area about spiritual life." So then when you get together again, you have a little conversation and pick it up where you left off.
But when you get together with folks, and you begin to talk about spiritual conversations, discern. Is their demand level low? Is it medium? Or is it high? And adjust accordingly. Okay, so that’s initiate and discern.
And then the next part of this habit is EXPLAIN.
Sometimes there will come a moment when the other person is ready to hear the gospel. Sometimes that moment will come, and you must be ready. In 1 Peter 3:15, the writer says, "Always be prepared to give an answer for the hope that lies within you." Be prepared always.
Paul says in Romans 10, "Every one who calls on the name of the Lord will be saved. But how can they call if they haven’t believed? And how can they believe if they haven’t heard? And how can they hear if no one has proclaimed?" If no one has explained, if no one has taught? You must be prepared.
And this is just real crucial to who we are as a church and to this talk this morning. So I want to spend a few moments doing some preparation stuff. I want to ask you right now to take out a pen and a piece of paper, everybody in this room. Now, I’m going to make this participatory — this part of the message — and it’s for a real important reason. Because what we prepare for now is a holy moment that will come in your life sometimes.
You know, when God said to Moses in the burning bush, "Moses, you’re on holy ground. Take your shoes off," it was ordinary ground, but it was holy because God was involved. You’ve been getting to know somebody that’s far from God, praying for them, and there comes a moment when their heart opens up a little bit. A heart that’s been full of sin and closed to God is open to hear the gospel.
Maybe you’re sitting in a restaurant. Maybe you’re talking over a back fence. Maybe you’re having a cup of coffee in your living room. You think about the drama of this moment.
Someone who was bound for hell that the evil one wants desperately to keep from God, their heart opens up a little bit, and they want to hear the gospel. That’s a holy moment. Only God does that to the human heart.
But you’ve got to be prepared. Ken Blanchard, who’s a leader, writes a lot about leadership. He says this sometimes when he’s with people. He asks himself the question,
"Do I love them enough to tell them the very best I know?"
Do I love this person enough to tell him or her the very best I know? Will you let that question stay in your mind when you’re with a seeking person? And that moment comes.
Do I love this person enough to tell them the very best I know? Because this story, this gospel story, is the very best that you know. This is not a "been there, done that" deal.
This is a story of your redemption. So I want to share it with you. This will be review for some of you that have been around for a while. But this is maybe the clearest and kind of graphic way to declare the gospel — just to explain it.
So, I’m going to walk us through this, and then I’m going to ask that you do it as well. And it’s real simple. It just goes like this. Somebody who wants to know how you become a Christian,
I will say, "Here’s the story of the human race. There is a God, he is alive, and he created you and he created me. He loves you, and he loves me. And he wants to be in a relationship with us. That’s the good news.
"But the bad news is that every one of us has sinned. And you know about that. You know that you lie sometimes, and you do selfish things sometimes. And God never does. God is without sin. God is perfect, and he intends for his world to be a perfect place. So sin has created this chasm between God and us. We are separated from God by our sin.
"And we cannot make our way back to God on our own. People try to do that sometimes. They think, ‘Well, maybe if I go to church enough I’ll earn my way to him. Or maybe if I give God enough money or do enough good deeds.’ But the fact is that because God’s standard is perfect because God is holy, I can’t be holy. I can’t be perfect, and neither can you.
"All of our efforts fall short, and the really bad news is the Bible says that the results, the wages, the natural outcome of our sin is death — spiritual and physical death — separation from God in hell through all eternity. This is real serious. And if we were left to our own devices, this is where we would end up — you and me.
"But God couldn’t stand for the world to end up that way, so God made another way. God made a kind of bridge for us to get to him, and that bridge is the cross. When Jesus died on the cross, he was dying the death that you and I should have. He was paying the moral debt that you can’t pay, and I can’t pay either.
"So our forgiveness would come not by our earning it, but as a free gift of God. That’s what grace is." And then I’ll say, "Now it’s a real good thing for you to understand this, but understanding is not enough. Because right now, you’re still on this side of the chasm, and you must make a choice. You have to choose to walk across that bridge and to be with God.
"The way that you do that is by saying to God, ‘I confess that I am a sinner. I know I’ve sinned, and now I receive the gift of forgiveness because Jesus died in my place. And I ask you to become the forgiver and the leader of my life.’ You can say that prayer right now, and you can know that you are made right with God and be with him forever."
Okay, now it’s just as simple as that.
But here’s what I want to do because it’s very important that when that holy moment comes, you’re ready for it, that you’re able to do this without faulting. It’s not enough to say you hear it and recognize it. You have to be able to do it. So I’m going to turn this into a big seminar room for the next couple of minutes.
I’m going to ask everybody here to turn to the person next to you, right or left, and you actually draw this and explain it to them, and they’ll do it for you.
Now I know that there will be groaning about this, so go ahead and groan. You have three seconds to go ahead and groan. Good, it’s out of your system so stop whining.
I’ll give you a couple of minutes. Turn to the person next to you, and so that you’re prepared I want you to walk them through this, and then they’ll do the same for you.
BREAK
Okay, I’m going to go ahead and draw this to a close because some of you are done, and you’re starting to play hangman and that’s going to mess the whole deal up for you.
But if you didn’t get a chance to finish, then do it afterwards. There’s also other ways to explain the gospel. There are a number of them listed in "Becoming a Contagious Christian," which you can get through Seeds or by going through the seminar. Find what works best for you.
But whatever you need to do to be ready when that holy moment comes, you do it, so you can explain the gospel in a way that’s real clear. You initiate spiritual discussions; you discern the person’s level of interest. When that holy moment comes and they’re ready, you be prepared to explain the gospel.
Then sometimes people will reach a point where they understand. They’ve thought and they’ve researched as they need to, and it’s time to make a decision. Then you need to ask. Sometimes you need to be the one to ask another human being if they’re ready to make a commitment to God now, if they’re ready to cross that bridge.
Often people need someone who will just give them the opportunity. Often nobody asks people. Well, that can be you.
You can say, "Are you ready now to receive Christ as the forgiver and leader of your life? And you can do that by just simply praying and asking him to forgive your sin, and asking him to become the leader of your life."
Now, sometimes people might be ready to do that, and then you can just lead them in that prayer. You can begin by you praying first, "God, help this person as he or she prays to be forgiven and to make you the leader." Then you just invite them to pray.
Often what happens is somebody is not ready for that prayer yet. What they need is someone who will help them identify barriers. A very helpful question here is to ask, "Is there anything that would prevent you from praying this prayer?"
I remember some time ago there was a seeking friend I had, and we had met together many, many times. He said, "There’s just so many options it gets a little confusing." And we’d been over a lot of stuff many times. So I just did a little drawing thing. And incidentally, if I can draw this stuff, anybody can because as you have already noticed my handwriting is very bad.
But I drew four boxes and I said, "Really, from our conversations I’d say there’s basically kind of four choices for this ultimate issue. There’s Christianity, there’s atheism or agnosticism, there’s other religions, or there’s drift." I said, "Based on our conversations, you’ve decided this is not an option. You’re sure there’s a God," because he was.
And I said, "You’ve also decided that other religions aren’t really an option for you. They’re not really drawing you." And he said, "Yeah, that’s true." "So either that leaves us with the fact that Christianity is true, that’s one option. The other option is what you’re choosing right now is just ‘drift,’ no commitment at all. And whichever one of these is true, for sure this one is not true. Either there is a God or there’s not, but for sure drift is not a good box to be in. So, you don’t want to end up there.
"So, what’s keeping you from moving from there to Christianity, to putting your faith in Christ?" And for him it was two issues. There were two barriers keeping him from praying that prayer. One of them was the idea that Jesus is the exclusive way to God. He was troubled by that. That was kind of an intellectual barrier. Sometimes people have that, so we talked about that for a while.
But then he said, "If you push me, there’s one other thing." He said, "It has to do with the Judeo-Christian sexual ethic because I understand it is quite strict." And he said, "I like women a lot." I said, "Well, that’s okay. I like women a lot too." He said, "Yeah, but let me put it like this."
We were having this discussion in a restaurant in California — the Good Earth Restaurant. It was a crowded restaurant; we were there for lunch. He said, "When you and Nancy got married, she was not like the first woman you had ever been with." And I said, "Well, actually, to tell you the truth, she was like the first woman I had ever been with." His eyes got big as saucers. He said, "No! You were a virgin? You must have been the only one in Southern California!"
He was saying this real loud so everyone in the Good Earth is looking over their tables, "See that guy over there?" "Yeah." "A virgin." "No!" So then we had to talk about that barrier because that was the thing that was keeping him from moving from this box over to here. I was so glad I had asked him that question, and we talked through that.
I asked him, "Your current approach with women, how well is that working? You stack up all the pros and cons of that against your eternal destiny because you’re convinced there is a God. You’re holding on to certain sexual options with the implications and consequences that’s having for your life, and again, an eternity with or without God. You tell me."
And the day he prayed that prayer and made Jesus the forgiver and leader of his life was one of the most exciting experiences in my life. You can do that. Now I want to ask for you to pray for two people who are far from God right now. And here’s what I was thinking about this week: I was thinking about how many prayers have been offered in this room over the last 20 years or so.
I was thinking about how we honor Lee Strobel this morning. We’re going to do that in just a few minutes. But I was thinking, you know, there’s not a gift in the world that we could give Lee that would mean more to him than a room full of people who had just flaming hearts for folks who, like me, once were far from God.
And I thought how for several years, not weeks or months but years, a woman named Leslie Strobel sat in this theater and sat in this room and prayed, "Oh God, it would take a miracle I know. But you can do it." And then it happened, and then that holy moment came in Lee’s life.
I thought what a great gift it would be for just a few moments to fill this room, and to have every prayer be just as fervent as that prayer that Leslie Strobel used to pray. So I want to ask you now to just take a couple of moments. And again, I’d invite you to huddle up with one or two people that you’re here with.
There are a few people you know. I challenge you to pick two who are far from God. You pray for them right now with every ounce of fervor and ask God to bring them to himself, and then we’ll close in prayer. So would you pray right now?