Practical Christianity — The Problem of Tongues

Text: James 3:1-18; Eph 4:29

Theme: A Christian needs to allow the Spirit of Christ to control his tongue and bring it under submission to God.

Has your tongue ever landed you in trouble? Silly question, right? ILLUS. John MacArthur tells the story of a young store clerk’s first day on the job. A lady came up to him and said she wanted to buy half of a head of lettuce. He tried to dissuade her from that, but she persisted ... she only wanted half a head of lettuce. Finally the young man said, “I’ll have to go back and talk to the manager.” He turned to go find the store manager, not noticing that the woman was walking right behind him. When he got into the back of the store, he told the manager, “There’s some stupid old woman out there who wants to buy half a head of lettuce. What should I tell her?” Seeing a horrified look on the face of the manager, he turned around and, seeing the woman standing there, quickly added, “And this nice lady wants to buy the other half. Will that be all right?”

Relieved, the manager said that would be fine. Later in the day, he congratulated the teenager on his quick thinking and asked, “Where are you from, son?” The boy replied, “I’m from Toronto, Canada sir, the home of beautiful hockey players and ugly women.”

The manager scowled, “My wife is from Toronto.” To which the teenager said, “Oh, and what team did she play for?”

The tongue is a blessing and a curse because with it we can either curse or bless. Like John Wesley, we can wish for a thousand tongues to sing our great redeemer’s praise, and with it, like Louis Farrakhan we can spue the vilest hate and ethnic vulgarity. In this chapter the Apostle James is as blunt about the corrosive power of the tongue as any author of Scripture. He writes in vs. 6 that the words we speak can set on fire the entire course of life, and that the tongue is set on fire by hell. This is incredibly strong language.

Your tongue can be either your worst enemy or your best friend. The way you use it makes all the difference. We can use it to hurt or we can use it to heal.

The unChristian use of the tongue has created more problems in our churches than all other issues combined. How many church schisms have been caused because of an escalating war of words between Christians?

The possibility of hurting or the opportunity of healing through what we say and how we say it is always before us. Is it any wonder that God gives us this information, through the Apostle James, about the use and abuse of the smallest muscle in our body?

I. NEVER UNDERESTIMATE THE TONGUE’S POWER

1. the tongue has the ability to direct the course of our lives vv. 2-4

a. but most people underestimate the power of the tongue

“So also the tongue is a small member, yet it boasts of great things. ... ” (James 3:5, ESV)

2. Martin Luther called the tongue, “That little piece of flesh between the jaws.”

a. for such a small piece of flesh, it has great power to direct the course of individuals, tribes and nations

1) Joshua proclaimed to the tribes of Israel, “As for me and my house, we will serve the Lord,” and the course of Israel was set

2) Winston Churchill broadcast to his fellow Britains during the dark days of WW2, “We will fight them on the beaches, we will fight them in the marshes, we will fight them in the streets; we shall never give up,” and an island nation fought on to victory

3) John F. Kennedy said, “We will put a man on the moon and safely bring him back by 1970" and it challenged a nation to greatness

4) Jesus said, “Father, forgive them . . . “ and we discover why the Second Person of the Godhead came in the flesh — to save sinners

3. James gives several illustrations of the tongue’s power to direct our lives and the lives of others

a. in vs. 3 he speaks of a bit in a the mouth of a horse — it’s such a little piece of metal — but it controls a large and powerful animal

b. in vs. 4 he speaks of a ship’s rudder — it’s a relatively small thing compared to the rest of the ship — but with it the helmsman can steer the largest vessel

4. James is telling us that something really small can steer something really large

a. in much the same way our tongues direct our lives

b. they control the direction in which we are traveling and so in a very real way, they control our lives

1) that’s power

c. our words have a tremendous impact both on ourselves and on others around us, and unfortunately, much of the language coming at us is coming through social media

ILLUS. Just last month a major report was published about how social media negatively affect teenage girls. The statistics are sobering. Nearly 1 in 3 teen girls report having seriously considered suicide in the past year. Between 2009 and 2019, depression rates doubled for all teens. Mitch Prinstein, the chief science officer at the American Psychological Association wrote in the article, “Within the last 20 years, the advent of portable technology and social media platforms [has been] changing what took 60,000 years to evolve," The average time spent daily on social media by teenagers is three hours.

Several huge issues are reported. 1st, People mature through face-to-face social interaction. Social media discourages that. And what interaction there is is all about generating “like” and “followers” not genuine dialogue — which cannot be accomplished via social media. We know that in any given conversation, only 10% of the meaning we take from the conversation comes from the words spoken. A full 90% of meaning in a conversation is perceived through voice inflection, eye contact, and other non-verbal cues. 2nd, victimization, harassment, and discrimination are rampant on social media platforms. Earlier this month, a 14-year-old New Jersey girl took her own life after she was attacked by fellow students at school and a video of the assault was posted on social media. 3rd, it’s hard for teenagers, especially teenage girls, not to compare themselves with what they see on social media. They go onto social media sites and compare themselves to everyone else out there, from the sunsets in their vacation pictures to their waistlines – but especially their waistlines and how they look, or feel our how they think they should look and feel, based on who's getting "likes" and who's not. Exposure to this online content is associated with lower self-image and distorted body perceptions among young people.

A. WHAT WE SAY CAN LIFT US UP OR MAKE US STUMBLE

1. the tongue has immense power to speak sinfully, erroneously, and inappropriately

a. it is often difficult to control — as though it has a mind and life of its own

b. we often say things we really do not mean in the passion of the moment

c. once uttered, cutting, hurting words are impossible to take back

ILLUS. Benjamin Franklin said, “A slip of the foot you may soon recover, But a slip of the tongue you may never get over.”

d. unless we yield our tongue as an instrument of righteousness unto God Satan will use it to his to his advantage and to our spiritual impoverishment

2. the maturing Christian, therefore, places his or her tongue under the authority of Christ and the control of the Holy Spirit

“Even a fool is thought wise if he keeps silent, and discerning if he holds his tongue.” (Proverbs 17:28, NIV)

3. James gives us an important Biblical principle in vs. 2 “If anyone is never at fault in what he says, he is a perfect man, able to keep his whole body in check.”

a. translation: If you can discipline and control your tongue there are few other areas of life you cannot master

b. the tongue is such a difficult thing to control that if you can learn to govern your speech, you can probably safely direct yourself in other areas of life

4. the tongue has the ability to direct the course of your life

II. NEVER TURN THE TONGUE LOOSE

1. we must not only never underestimate the power of the tongue, but we must never turn it loose

2. the tongue has the ability to destroy the course of your life

“Likewise the tongue is a small part of the body, but it makes great boasts. Consider what a great forest is set on fire by a small spark. 6 The tongue also is a fire, a world of evil among the parts of the body. It corrupts the whole person, sets the whole course of his life on fire, and is itself set on fire by hell.” (James 3:5-6, NIV)

2. again, James uses several illustrations to explain the destructive ability and unruliness of the human tongue

a. like fire, our choice of language destroys, it harms, it leaves behind it ravaged lives

ILLUS. In 1871 the Great Chicago Fire began with a kerosene lamp being knocked over. The resulting conflagration consumed the city. Two-thousand acres of Chicago went up in flames and smoke. 18,000 buildings were destroyed. Three-hundred people died and 90,000 were left homeless. But as bad as the Chicago Fire was, there was a far worse fire that same night just a few hundred miles further north. It was the Great Peshtigo Fire and remains the worst forest fire in North American history. It raged for days in northeastern Wisconsin. It scorched 1.2 million acres, destroyed 16 towns and caused an estimated $169 million dollars in damage. It killed 2,400 people – triple the Chicago fire. 800 citizens from the town of Peshtigo died. It was so horrific, that some people thought it was the end of the world.

4. James attempts to illustrate the tongues great destructive power when it is turned loose

a. our tongues must be guarded at all times, lest it runs wild

‘He who guards his mouth and his tongue keeps himself from calamity.” (Proverbs 21:23, NIV)

A. LIKE A FOREST FIRE, THE DEVASTATION CAUSED BY THE TONGUE CAN BE FAR REACHING

1. a careless word, a nasty rumor, a bit of slander can ruin a person’s reputation and cause damage far beyond that person’s life

a. an evil word of idle gossip can spread like a brush fire in a dry Missouri August

2. a tongue that is out of control is like fire out of control

a. once the spark is dropped and the fire starts, the harm is done

b. you can’t get the spark back

ILLUS. Someone once calculated that for every word in Adolf Hitler’s book Mein Kamph 125 people died.

B. NOT ONLY IS THE TONGUE DESTRUCTIVE, IT IS UNRULY

“All kinds of animals, birds, reptiles and creatures of the sea are being tamed and have been tamed by man, “(James 3:7, NIV)

1. animals large and small have been tamed by man, but the tongue is the most difficult beast to control

III. ALWAYS LISTEN CAREFULLY TO WHAT THE TONGUE SAYS

James 3:9-12

1. James is telling us that the tongue has the ability to delight or damn

a. what we do with it reveals our hearts

b. Jesus taught this long before James ever did

Matthew 12:34 “. . . For out of the overflow of the heart the mouth speaks.” NIV

c. in other words, the condition of our heart frequently determines the content of our words

2. human beings, sometimes even born-again human beings, are often a bundle of contradictions

3. the Apostle Paul laments of this in the seventh chapter of Romans:

“My own behavior baffles me. For I find myself not doing what I really want to do but doing what I really loathe . . . I don’t accomplish the good I set out to do, and the evil I don’t really want to do I find I am always doing.”

a. no where is this bundle of contradictions more evident than in the tongue

“With the tongue we praise our Lord and Father, and with it we curse men, who have been made in God’s likeness. 10 Out of the same mouth come praise and cursing” (James 3:9-10, NIV)

4. again, James gives us illustrations of this

a. in vs. 11 James asks a rhetorical question: “Can fresh water and salt water flow from the same spring?”

1) of course not!

b. in vs. 12 he asks a similar question: “Can a fig tree bear olives, or a grapevine bear figs . . .”

1) the implication is that it’s against their very nature to do so

2) so too, ought it be against the Christian’s very nature to bless God one day and curse fellow men the next

3) yet, it happens

ILLUS. Look at the life of the Apostle Peter. One moment he tells Jesus, ‘Even if it means dying with you, I will never disown you,’ and a few hours later he is denying Christ with oaths and curses.

ILLUS. Look at the Apostle John. This man wrote, ‘Little children, love one another.’ Yet in the gospels he wanted to call down the fire of God down from heaven to burn up a Samaritan village!

A. THE USE OF YOUR TONGUE REVEALS WHAT YOU ARE REALLY LIKE ON THE INSIDE

ILLUS. Jesus spoke to the Pharisees about this when he said that they were like tombs. White and polished on the outside, but full of corruption — decaying flesh and bones — on the inside.

1. the language you use, more than anything else about you, presents an image to the world of your inner self—of who and what you really are

a. if you are a critical of others in your language, it’s a fair indication that by nature you are a critical person

b. if your language is gloomy and melancholic and joyless with little inflection, it’s a good bet that you’re an unhappy person

c. if your language is uplifting and encouraging you’re probably a joyful person

d. it you are a righteous person because Jesus has made a difference in your character and conduct, they that is also going to show up in you speech and the way you talk

2. what you are comes out in the way you talk

3. if you have a problem with your tongue the first thing you need to do is check out the condition of your heart

a. the only way to change your heart it to turn to God and humble yourself as David did when he prayed:

Psalm 51:10 “Create in me a pure heart, O God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me.” NIV

b. I like the way the Living Bible translates this verse: Create in me a new, clean heart, O God, filled with clean thoughts and right desires.

IV. SEEK TO TAME THE TONGUE

James 3:13-18

1. “Wait a minute” you say, “Didn’t James just tell us in verse eight that ‘no man can tame the tongue?”

2. yes, that is true, no man can tame the tongue, but the Holy Spirit can!

A. TAMING THE TONGUE BEGINS WITH TENDERIZING THE HEART

“Who is wise and understanding among you? Let him show it by his good life, by deeds done in the humility that comes from wisdom. 14 But if you harbor bitter envy and selfish ambition in your hearts, do not boast about it or deny the truth.” (James 3:13-14, NIV)

1. our tongue problem is really a heart problem

a. when our heart is right before God, the mouth will speak only good things

b. when our mouth does not say good things, it’s probably an indication that the cares of this world and the sin in our life have hardened our hearts

c. this is why the Bible tells us . . . “Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life.” (Proverbs 4:23) NIV

2. what kind of hearts do we need?

a. we need a repentant heart

1) after each transgression of the tongue, we need to examine our hearts and confess the sinful attitudes at the root

b. we need thankful hearts

1) the Apostle Paul gives us a command in 1 Thess 5:18 – Give thanks in all circumstances

2) when we focus on all that God has done for us our hearts will begin to overflow with gratefulness

3) when that happens, our words will point other toward God’s goodness and critical comments will disappear from our language

c. we need hearts that know God’s love

1) our language will be transformed as we begin to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge (Eph. 3:18-19)

2) we’ll no longer be tempted to boast of our accomplishments to impress people

3) we won’t need to embellish a story to make ourselves look good

d. we need hearts that love people

1) how many of our speech problems would disappear if we truly loved other people?

e. we need hearts that are humble

1) in his book Tongue in Check, Joseph Stowell says that much of our critical language has its root in pride

2) Proverbs 8:13 tells us that pride and arrogance result in evil behavior and perverse speech

3) and Psalm 10 attributes boasting, cursing, lying, and contentious speech to pride

B. WE NEED TO DEVELOP CHRISTLIKE ATTITUDES

“But the wisdom that comes from heaven is first of all pure; then peace-loving, considerate, submissive, full of mercy and good fruit, impartial and sincere.” (James 3:17, NIV)

1. when you begin to develop the Mind of Christ, your attitudes will change as well as your speech

2. the only way to have the Mind of Christ is to read the book that’s about His life – the Bible

C. UNDERSTAND THE LAW OF SOWING AND REAPING

“Peacemakers who sow in peace raise a harvest of righteousness.” (James 3:18, NIV)

1. the opposite is also true

a. if you speak evil and gossip don’t be surprised when people around you reciprocate!

“If you keep on biting and devouring each other, watch out or you will be destroyed by each other.” (Galatians 5:15, NIV)

2. what you sow with your tongue, is what you will reap from the tongues of others

Is your tongue under the control and authority of Jesus tonight?