Biblically Responding to Someone With a Life-Dominating Sin

Introduction

Among your friends, family, or acquaintances, you may know someone who is enslaved by a life-dominating sin. As a faithful, loving believer, you have the unique opportunity to help reconcile this person to the Lord (if an unbeliever) or help restore him to a life of peace, joy, and righteousness (if a believer).

2 Corinthians 5:14–20 KJV 1900

14 For the love of Christ constraineth us; because we thus judge, that if one died for all, then were all dead: 15 And that he died for all, that they which live should not henceforth live unto themselves, but unto him which died for them, and rose again. 16 Wherefore henceforth know we no man after the flesh: yea, though we have known Christ after the flesh, yet now henceforth know we him no more. 17 Therefore if any man be in Christ, he is a new creature: old things are passed away; behold, all things are become new. 18 And all things are of God, who hath reconciled us to himself by Jesus Christ, and hath given to us the ministry of reconciliation; 19 To wit, that God was in Christ, reconciling the world unto himself, not imputing their trespasses unto them; and hath committed unto us the word of reconciliation. 20 Now then we are ambassadors for Christ, as though God did beseech you by us: we pray you in Christ’s stead, be ye reconciled to God.

Galatians 6:1–5 KJV 1900

1 Brethren, if a man be overtaken in a fault, ye which are spiritual, restore such an one in the spirit of meekness; considering thyself, lest thou also be tempted. 2 Bear ye one another’s burdens, and so fulfil the law of Christ. 3 For if a man think himself to be something, when he is nothing, he deceiveth himself. 4 But let every man prove his own work, and then shall he have rejoicing in himself alone, and not in another. 5 For every man shall bear his own burden.

Life-dominating Sins of Others Provide An Opportunity to Examine Yourself Biblically

Before attempting to deal with another person’s sins, you are to examine your own life before the Lord.

Matthew 7:1–5 KJV 1900

1 Judge not, that ye be not judged. 2 For with what judgment ye judge, ye shall be judged: and with what measure ye mete, it shall be measured to you again. 3 And why beholdest thou the mote that is in thy brother’s eye, but considerest not the beam that is in thine own eye? 4 Or how wilt thou say to thy brother, Let me pull out the mote out of thine eye; and, behold, a beam is in thine own eye? 5 Thou hypocrite, first cast out the beam out of thine own eye; and then shalt thou see clearly to cast out the mote out of thy brother’s eye.

You are to be a faithful doer of the Word in all things (James 1:25), since your obedience to Scripture is based on your love for the Lord (John 14:15; 1 John 5:3; 2 John 1:6) and not on another’s behavior.

As a doer of the Word, you are to treat others in the same manner that you would like them to treat you. Matthew 7:12 “12 Therefore all things whatsoever ye would that men should do to you, do ye even so to them: for this is the law and the prophets.”

As a doer of the Word, you are to show Biblical love at all times and to esteem others as more important than yourself (based on Luke 10:25-37; 1 Corinthians 13:4-8; Philippians 2:3-4).

As a doer of the Word, you are to practice Biblical forgiveness and to encourage Biblical reconciliation at all times (based on Matthew 5:23-24; Mark 11:25-26; Luke 17:3-4; Ephesians 5:32).

Believers or Unbelievers Need to Learn the Effects of Their Life-dominating Sin

A person with a life-dominating sin cannot know the full effects of his sinful practice in his own life or the lives of others, because:

He is focused on gratifying self-centered desires (based on 1 Corinthians 6:9-12; Galatians 5:19-21; James 1:14-15);

He is spiritually deluded and does not know the kind of person he really is (based on James 1:22-24); and

He cannot clearly discern between good and evil (based on 1 Corinthians 2:14; Hebrews 5:14).

Out of your commitment to the Lord and your Biblical love for someone enslaved to sin, you are to avoid quarreling (2 Timothy 2:24-26) and blameshifting (Ezekiel 18:4, 20; Romans 14:12). Instead, speak the truth in love by telling the person of the detrimental effects his sin will have on himself and others (based on Romans 6:16, 13:11-14; Ephesians 4:25, 5:11-14; James 1:14-15, especially verse 15).

If the person with a life-dominating sin is a believer, use Biblical restoration procedures (Matthew 18:15-17; Galatians 6:1).

If the person is an unbeliever, remember that he cannot understand the things of God (1 Corinthians 2:14). However, he sometimes will realize that his actions are “wrong” (Romans 1:18-23, especially verse 19). In spite of his enslavement and delusion, an unbeliever can often be helped to understand the magnitude and effects of his present sinful behavior in every area of his life (Proverbs 13:15; Colossians 3:25; 1 John 3:4).

A person enslaved by sin will often try to excuse his sinful behavior. However, even one involved in the sin cannot over look these consequences since they deal with observable, measurable facts (e.g., lying, pregnancy out of wedlock, venereal diseases or AIDS, hiding money or not being willing to account for money spent, encouraging others to participate with him in sin, asking others to “cover up” for him, failing to at work on time, hiding drugs or alcohol, not completing household responsibilities, etc.).

It is sometimes necessary to keep a record of the many effects and consequences of another’s sinful behavior in order to present this evidence to the one who is enslaved by sin. This is not done in order to “remember wrongs suffered against you,” which would be a violation of Biblical love (1 Corinthians 13:5); but it is done with the purpose of lovingly teaching another of his focus on self and his lack of love for God and others (based on Ephesians 4:25, 5:11-12).

Always be ready to present the liberating message of Jesus Christ to someone who is under Satan’s dominion and is enslaved by sin (1 Peter 3:15-16).

If a person with a life-dominating sin breaks a law that must be reported to governmental authorities (for example: child abuse or child endangerment, drug us, drug sales or purchases, robbery, assault and battery, etc.), he is to be dealt with by those authorities (Romans 13:1-7; 1 Peter 2:13-16).\

NOTE: Friends or family members of a person mastered by sin often know that he has broken the law. However, in a misguided effort to “help him” or “not cause him any more trouble,” they will not contact governmental authorities to deal with the matter. Friends and family members thus “cover up” for a person breaking the law and, often without realizing it, help to forestall the needed consequences of sin and/or the discipline of the Lord.

You are Use All Biblical Resources and Remain Obedient to Scripture in Every Dimension When Dealing with a Person Enslaved by Sin

You are not responsible to change a person who is mastered by sin, nor are you able to do so. Lasting change in anyone’s life is the work of the Holy Spirit that is linked to one’s obeying the Word of God (2 Corinthians 3:18; Galatians 5:22-23; 1 Thessalonians 2:13; Titus 3:5; 1 Peter 1:2-11).

Even though you are to bear the weaknesses of those without strength and are to please others for their edification (Romans 15:1-2), you are not to hide failures or assume responsibilities of those who have life-dominating sin (based on Proverbs 26:5; Romans 14:12; Ephesians 5:11-12).

NOTE: Sometimes, well-meaning but misguided friends or family members “cushion” a person from the effects of his life-dominating sin. Thus, he is shielded from the usual, far-reaching consequences of his sinful behavior and does not personally experience the discipline of the Lord to an effective degree. As a result, he may continue to practice sin because he has been denied the consequences that the Lord wants to use to turn him from his sinful ways (based on Proverbs 1:22-32; Hebrews 12:5-13, especially verses 10-11).

After Biblically confronting someone with a life-dominating sin, do not shun or avoid him until he “proves himself.” The restoration and reconciliation process requires your consistent and faithful involvement in his life, in a spirit of gentleness (based on Proverbs 17:17; 27:5-6, 17; Matthew 18:15-17; Luke 17:3-4; 2 Corinthians 5:17-21; Galatians 6:1-2).

No matter what adverse effects another’s life-dominating sin has had on you, you are to forgive him from your heart (Matthew 18:21-35, especially verse 35), even if it is necessary to keep aloof from him (2 Thessalonians 3:6).

You are not to gossip about someone with a life-dominating sin (based on Leviticus 19:16; Proverbs 17:9, 18:8; Romans 1:28-32, especially verse 29; 2 Corinthians 12:20); instead you are to seek Biblical counsel, as necessary, to determine how you should respond to someone in this condition. This Biblical counsel should come only from those who are mature enough to help you face and deal with the problem in a Biblical manner (based on Proverbs 11:14, 15:22).

NOTE: Gossip is not a matter of information being true or false. Even though the information is true, it is gossip whenever you pass on information that is not edifying about another simply for “information’s sake” instead of it being integral to the restoration process (based on Matthew 7:12; Romans 15:2; Ephesians 4:29).

In dealing with a believer about his life-dominating sin, encourage him to examine his thoughts (Matthew 15:19; Mark 7:20-23)_, speech (Matthew 12:34; Luke 6:45), and actions (Matthew 15:18-20; Mark 7:20-23), Biblically, especially as to how these relate to overcoming the sin that has dominated his life.

NOTE: Feelings, good or bad, that are associated with overcoming a life-dominating sin are not to be the focus of attention. Instead, encourage the individual to concentrate on pleasing the Lord and bringing glory to Him by being obedient to His Word (based on John 14:15, 15:8; 2 Corinthians 5:9; Colossians 1:9-12; 1 John 5:3) in thought (2 Corinthians 10:5; Philippians 4:8), speech (Ephesians 4:29; Colossians 4:6), and actions (Matthew 5:16; 1 Corinthians 10:31; Philippians 4:9; Colossians 3:17). Remember that lasting peace and joy are promised to a believer who is obedient to Scripture (based on Psalm 119:165-168; John 15:10-11; Romans 14:17; Philippians 4:6-7).

Throughout the process of dealing with someone with a life-dominating sin, be diligent to:

Examine yourself Biblically (Matthew 7:1-5; 1 Corinthians 11:31). Regularly and diligently confess your sins to the Lord (1 John 1:9) and, at the appropriate time, to those against whom you have sinned (James 5:16).

Be faithful in maintaining your own daily devotions, Scripture memory and prayer life (Psalm 1:1-3, 119:11; Colossians 4:2).

Practice Biblical love and Biblical communication at all times, being especially careful not to return evil for evil but to overcome evil with good. Remember that your life is to be salt and light in all situations in order to give glory to God (Matthew 5:13-16; Romans 12:21; 1 Corinthians 13:4-8; Ephesians 4:25, 29; Colossians 4:6; 1 Peter 3:8-9).

Be a Biblical steward in every area of your life (1 Corinthians 4:2).

Trust God in this situation, knowing that He will work all things out for good in your life as you continue to obey His Word (Romans 8:28-29). Remember that trials are designed to mature you in Christ (based on Romans 5:3-5; James 1:2-4).