A small story in the big story (Philemon)

FCF: One of the Fallen Condition Focus in Philemon is “Forgiveness”. - Focus of this talk.

Introduction

The Ten Boom family were members of the Dutch Reformed Church who were hiding Jews from arrest and deportation during the German occupation of the Netherlads.

The Gestapo (German secret state police) raided thier house on February 28, 1944, arresting around 30 people in thier family home (members attending a prayer meeting, some resistance workers, and other family members).

After the war, Corrie ten Boom traveled the world as an evangelist, motivational speaker, and social critic,

“It was at a church service in Munich that I saw him, the former S.S. man who had stood guard at the shower door in the processing center at Ravensbruck. He was the first of our actual jailers that I had seen since that time. And suddenly it was all there – the roomful of mocking men, the heaps of clothing, Betsie’s pain-blanched face.

He came up to me as the church was emptying, beaming and bowing. ‘How grateful I am for your message, Fraulein.’ He said. ‘To think that, as you say, He has washed my sins away!’

His hand was thrust out to shake mine. And I, who preached so often to the people in Bloemendaal the need to forgive, kept my hand at my side.

Even as the angry, vengeful thoughts boiled through me, I saw the sin of them. Jesus Christ had died for this man; was I going to ask for more? Lord Jesus, I prayed, forgive me and help me to forgive him.

I tried to smile, I struggled to raise my hand. I could not. I felt nothing, not the slightest spark of warmth or charity. And so again I breathed a silent prayer. Jesus, I cannot forgive him. Give me your forgiveness.

As I took his hand the most incredible thing happened. From my shoulder along my arm and through my hand a current seemed to pass from me to him, while into my heart sprang a love for this stranger that almost overwhelmed me.

And so I discovered that it is not on our forgiveness any more than on our goodness that the world’s healing hinges, but on his. When he tells us to love our enemies, He gives, along with the command, the love itself.”

C.S. Lewis said “Everyone thinks forgiveness is a lovely idea, until they have something to forgive.”

Philemon is “a short letter with a BIG message”, it is a small story in light of the big story of what Christ has done for us - let’s examine. Amen!

Quick recap of the story of Philemon

Paul’s shortest letter, and a personal letter to Philemon

The book of Philemon was written to Philemon who was saved through the ministry of Paul

Onesimus was the slave of Philemon, noting that this was a common practice of the time. He had evidently stolen from his master and escaped running away from Colossae to Rome in order to dissapear. (Philemon 18 “If he has wronged you at all, or owes you anything, charge that to my account.”)

While in Rome Onesimus came into contact with Paul somehow - either by design of his own or by accident (but ultimately according to God’s divine appointment and soverign plan).

Paul lead this runaway slave to Christ and now sends him back to his master Philemon. He was useful to Paul while he was with him. (Philemon 10 “that I appeal to you for my son Onesimus, who became my son while I was in chains.” )

Paul sends back Philemon to with this letter (Philemon 12 “I am sending him—who is my very heart—back to you.” )

Philemon:

A godly man whose family loved Jesus and the church at Collosae met in his house

This excellent man, then, had a certain slave named Onesimus who ran away after stealing from him.

Slavery

Just before we get to the hard topic of forgiveness let me spend a minute dealing another hard topic - slavery. Because like it or not, this letter takes us there. So let me spend a minute addressing the issue / elephant in the room of this book.

The fact that Paul does not directly call for Philemon to release Onesimus has troubled many people, and many individuals have criticized the Bible for allowing slavery.

Paul had to deal with slavery and teach the church in Colossians which was immersed in the cultural acceptance of slavery to put Christians principles into practice and take precedence over the cultural viewpoint because we are all equal in Christ. Amen

It is also important to keep in mind that slavery as practiced in biblical times was very different than the chattel slavery practiced in the Western world until the nineteenth century.

Furthermore it is necessary to remember that slavery in the ancient world was almost the only way to deal with impoverishment.

Slavery was key to the ancient economic system and kept many people from going hungry.

When one could not take care of oneself and one’s family,

selling oneself into slavery could mean the difference between life and death.

In other words, ancient slavery enabled people to escape starvation in the absence of systems we have today such as centrelink, no welfare, no government handouts, no Salvation Army or soup kitchen. There was just starvation then death for you and your family.

God revealed Himself to people trapped in personal sin as well as the sinful structures that exist in a fallen world.

That is exactly what we find in Scripture—a transformation of the master-slave relationship that leads inevitably to the end of slavery wherever the gospel is truly embraced and its implications for all of society are lived out.

F. F. Bruce pointed out, “What this epistle does is to bring us into an atmosphere in which the institution could only wilt and die” (ibid.).

NOTICE: the prinicpal Paul is pointing to here is to the change of character and a heart of love from God. Just as Paul never commanded the release of slavery of Philemon, Likewise we never find the direct command or even the word “Forgive” in this epistle. - the change of heart and character would push a Christian to do the right thing - which is to forgive, and to transform the master-slave relationship to dear brother in Christ.

EXAMPLE: William wilberforce (British politican who was instrumental in the struggle to end slavery):

Wilberforce's involvement in the abolition movement (to end slavery) was motivated by a desire to put his Christian principles into action and to serve God in public life. He and other evangelicals were horrified by what they perceived was a depraved and un-Christian trade, and the greed and avarice of the owners and traders. (Wikipedia)

Forgiveness

Many of us have have been hurt by someone else’s words or actions.

Some of these can cause so much pain in our lives, wounding us emotionally.

It can lead us to be harbour feelings of resentment, bitterness, and revenge.

As people in this world we will all go through experiences, but, how are we to respond as believer in Christ?

1. Why is forgiveness important?

It is important for us to forgive, beacuse Christ forgave us. Not becuase we are seeking to earn God’s favour through being loving and forgivng RATHER it is because of having an “attitude of gratitude” - becuase we have been loved much and we have been forgiven much, we do likewise beacause it is a reaction to His love and the gratitiude of our changed hearts.

IT IS REMEMBERING THIS SMALL STORY IN LIGHT OF THE BIG STORY OF WHAT GOD HAS DONE FOR US

It is how we honor God.

Let us remember the great sacrifce of Jesus:

Christ laid down His life for us and died for our sins (John 10:11 ““I am the good shepherd. The good shepherd lays down his life for the sheep.”, 1 Corinthians 15:3 “For what I received I passed on to you as of first importance: that Christ died for our sins according to the Scriptures,” )

He cancelled our ETERNAL sin debt (Colossians 2:14 “having canceled the charge of our legal indebtedness, which stood against us and condemned us; he has taken it away, nailing it to the cross.” )

Christ reconciled us to God (Romans 5:10 “For if, while we were God’s enemies, we were reconciled to him through the death of his Son, how much more, having been reconciled, shall we be saved through his life!” )

WE ARE TO WALK IN THE WAY OF LOVE - Just as Christ poured out his love on us (1 John 4:19 “We love because he first loved us.” )

Ephesians 5:1-2 “Follow God’s example, therefore, as dearly loved children and walk in the way of love, just as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us as a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God.”

If we are disciples of Christ, and children of God, we ought to follow the same examples.

All our actions must be based on the love that Christ has poured on us.

Philemon had a real heart of love, and Paul wanted this to be the basis of his forgiveness of Onesimus - as he had experienced FORGIVENESS AND LOVE in Christ.

Philemon 5 “because I hear about your love for all his holy people and your faith in the Lord Jesus.”

Philemon 7 “Your love has given me great joy and encouragement, because you, brother, have refreshed the hearts of the Lord’s people.”

Philemon 8-9 “Therefore, although in Christ I could be bold and order you to do what you ought to do, yet I prefer to appeal to you on the basis of love. It is as none other than Paul—an old man and now also a prisoner of Christ Jesus—”

Paul says that he does not want to order Philemon to forgive, becuase he knows what he ought to do and makes his appeal on the basis and the foundation of “love”, which is a result of his faith because of God’s grace poured our in his life. - this must be the real reason to do so:

PHILEMON EXPERIENCED GOD’S LOVE THROUGH SALVATION - and out of his gratitude and love of what he had recieved would provide forigveness

ONESIMUS EXPERIENCED GOD’S LOVE THROUGH SALVATION - out of his gratitude and love knew he needed to be reconciled with his master.

Philemon had all the rights to bring on the full force of the law on Onesimus:

Moses Finley remarks, "fugitive slaves are almost an obsession in the sources". Rome forbade the harbouring of fugitive slaves, and professional slave-catchers were hired to hunt down runaways. Advertisements were posted with precise descriptions of escaped slaves, and offered rewards. (https://www.bbc.co.uk/history/ancient/romans/slavery_01.shtml) If caught, fugitives could be punished by being whipped, burnt with iron, or killed. (Johnston, Mary. Roman Life. Chicago: Scott, Foresman and Company, 1957, p. 158–177) - Wikipedia

The outcome of UNFORGIVENESS is:

bitterness, rage, anger, brawling, slander, along with every form of malice.

Also every action we do, is an outcome of what God has already done. See the commands below. Notice here in these letters, Paul re-iterates, “Just as in Christ God forgave you”, and “Forgive as the Lord forgave you.”

Ephesians 4:31-32 “Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.”

Colossians 3:13 “Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.”

Luke 6:35-36 “But love your enemies, do good to them, and lend to them without expecting to get anything back. Then your reward will be great, and you will be children of the Most High, because he is kind to the ungrateful and wicked. Be merciful, just as your Father is merciful.”

Matthew 5:7 “Blessed are the merciful, for they will be shown mercy.”

We love, becuase of God’s love (1 John 4:19-21 “We love because he first loved us. Whoever claims to love God yet hates a brother or sister is a liar. For whoever does not love their brother and sister, whom they have seen, cannot love God, whom they have not seen. And he has given us this command: Anyone who loves God must also love their brother and sister.” )

What happens when we do not forgive?

It impacts our prayer and worship of God: Matthew 5:23-24 ““Therefore, if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother or sister has something against you, leave your gift there in front of the altar. First go and be reconciled to them; then come and offer your gift.”

We can only seek forgiveness in the same measure as we forgive others. Matthew 6:12 “And forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors.”

We will not be forgiven if we do not forgive: Matthew 6:14-15 “For if you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive others their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins.”

This is NOT TO SAY that we are seeking for our justification daily, becuase we already justified forever through the atoning sacrifice of Jesus Christ through grace.

Instead this is a prayer for the restoration of our personal relationship with Chirst which has been hindered by sin and unforgiveness.

Everything we do is a direct result of what Christ has done for us, and becuase he has transformed us to become more like Him every day and to be shining lights to the world to point to Christ and for the glory of the Father (Matthew 5:16 “In the same way, let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven.” )

2. What to do when forgiveness is difficult?

Forgiveness involves sacrifice and it is not cheap - it is costly. There is a price to forgiveness. It is as though we are being wronged twice in a sense. First in that we have been wronged by a person and then we have to forgive them of the wrong they have commited against us.

Our natural inclination is to retalite when someone has wronged us.

Especially when looking at what caused the offense it is very easy to become angry, bitter, and resentful.

Forgiveness is a spiritual act and we need the grace of God in order to achieve it.

Pray for help and rely on the Holy Spirit

Paul in this letter begins by praying for Philemon. Philemon 6 “I pray that your partnership with us in the faith may be effective in deepening your understanding of every good thing we share for the sake of Christ.”

Philemon needs to understand the full extent of what the gospel demands from him (hence Paul prays for him to have a deeper understanding of every good thing). Hence his willingness to forgive comes from having a deeper understanding of what Jesus has done for him.

WE NEED TO SEEK THE HELP AND PRAYER OF OUR BROTHERS AND SISTERS IN CHRIST TO SUPPORT US IN PRAYER, AS WE ALSO PRAY FOR STRENGTH

Jesus Himself speaks of the parable of the parable of the unforgiving servant in Matthew 18:23-35)

Jesus teaches this parable, when Peter asks the following question: Matthew 18:21-22 “Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, “Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother or sister who sins against me? Up to seven times?” Jesus answered, “I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times.”

A king wished to settle accounts and there was one who owed him 10,000 talents (equivalent to several million dollars todaty)

Since he could not pay this amount, the king ordered him to be sold with his wife, children, and all that he had so the payment could be made

This servant then falls on his knees, imploring him, asking for patience so that he would pay everything

Out of pity the master of the servant released him and forgave him his debt

This same servant went out and found one of his fellow servants who owed him a 100 dinarii, and seizing him began choking him, saying, “pay what you owe.”

This servant fell to his knees and pleaded with him “Have patience with me and I will pay you. BUT he refused and instead and put him in prison until he should pay all the debt owed.

When his fellow servants saw what had happened, they were greatly distressed, and and reported to the master all that had taken place

Then the master summoned him and said, “You wicked servant! I forgave you all the debt because you pleaded with me, and should you not have shown mercy to your fellow servant as I had shown mercy to you?

In anger his master delivered him to the jailers, until he should pay all the debt

Then Jesus says in Matthew 18:35 “This is how my heavenly Father will treat each of you unless you forgive your brother or sister from your heart.”

The priciple here is that “the one forgiven much should forgive much” - not the number of times. (In other words out of grace rather than works)

The principle of forgiveness is that grace or forgiveness to one another is to be without limit (our unpayable debt was paid by Christ). Romans 5:8 “But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.” - We recieved MUCH FORGIVENESS from GOD through Christ, likewise we must be willing to give MUCH to those who have sinned against us.

The point here is that when someone has offended us greatly, and hurt us, we should be willing to forgive from a heart of gratitude for the grace to which we ourselves are debtors to.

Pray for those for whom forgiveness is difficult (notice Paul prays for Philemon).

We can seek the help of our brothers and sisters in Christ to support us in prayer and the grace to forgive the one who has wronged us

Brothers and sisters in Christ, may we take the initiative to pray for those who need help in forgiving someone else.

Maybe you’ve tried to play the role of mediator, helping others with forgiveness etc, in your home, workplace, classroom, etc pray for God to help them with it just like Paul prayed for Philemon.

God is the one who comforts and heals us when we are emotiionally, mentally, physically, spiritually and relationaly hurt

Psalm 147:3 “He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds.”

Corrie Ten Boom as she was faced with forgiving the person who had caused pain beyond measure, had to rely on God to help her forgive. She says in her account:

Even as the angry, vengeful thoughts boiled through me, I saw the sin of them. Jesus Christ had died for this man; was I going to ask for more? Lord Jesus, I prayed, forgive me and help me to forgive him.

Sometime when we do not forgive - we are really saying the the “sacrifice of Jesus” is not good enough in your situation. As Corries says about “Jesus Christ had died for this man; was I going to ask for more???

It really hits us hard when we think of it this way

Look at your situation and ask yourself the question, if the sacrifice of Jesus is good enough for your offender, are you going to ask more?

I tried to smile, I struggled to raise my hand. I could not. I felt nothing, not the slightest spark of warmth or charity. And so again I breathed a silent prayer. Jesus, I cannot forgive him. Give me your forgiveness.

As I took his hand the most incredible thing happened. From my shoulder along my arm and through my hand a current seemed to pass from me to him, while into my heart sprang a love for this stranger that almost overwhelmed me.

We must realise that it is truly impossible to forgive without God.

We must rely on God’s heart, God’s love, and God’s power to enable us to forgive those who have sinned against us.

Timothy Keller says in his new book “Forgive” (Pg 181): “Don’t let yourself be twisted. Take in what Jesus Christ has done, put your little story about what people have done to you in the big story of what he did for you, and you’ll have the power you need to grant forgiveness” (181).”

Application

Look at your situation through the lens of the cross

Forgiveness might not be easy but it is totally worth it, especially in terms of our relationship with one another and our relationship with God.

The truth is that none of us are perfect, and we are a work in progress. But we have the helper the Holy Spirit to help us in this journey of living out the gospel. We must be completely reliant on Christ. Seeking him daily to help us “live out the gospel”, even in the hardest of circumstances. Amen!

Has someone in the curch family offended you? How are you going to respond?

Do you disagree with someone on a certain matter, and that has led you to hatred and rejection of that person? How are you going to reconcile?

At the testing of our faith, how are we faring? Are we experiencing and putting into practice the fruit of the Spirit we have been blessed by and making it effective (in action) in our life by seeking God’s help?

3. Does forgiveness always lead to reconciliation?

We see in Philemon, that Onesimus was willing to return to His master asking for forgiveness and seeking reconciliation.

When Onesimus was sent back to Philemon, Paul’s hope was that both would reconcile to one another. Saying in Philemon 15-19 “Perhaps the reason he was separated from you for a little while was that you might have him back forever—no longer as a slave, but better than a slave, as a dear brother. He is very dear to me but even dearer to you, both as a fellow man and as a brother in the Lord. So if you consider me a partner, welcome him as you would welcome me. If he has done you any wrong or owes you anything, charge it to me. I, Paul, am writing this with my own hand. I will pay it back—not to mention that you owe me your very self.”

Reconciliation is the goal of forgiveness

This is why Paul wanted reconciliation to takes place between the two. It is a strong message of the gospel itself, not only preached but to show it lived out in our life.

2 Cor 5:18-20 “All this is from God, who reconciled us to himself through Christ and gave us the ministry of reconciliation: that God was reconciling the world to himself in Christ, not counting people’s sins against them. And he has committed to us the message of reconciliation. We are therefore Christ’s ambassadors, as though God were making his appeal through us. We implore you on Christ’s behalf: Be reconciled to God.”

Paul was an ambassodar of Christ with the ministry of reconciliation not only in terms of the gospel from God to man, but among the brothers and sisters in Christ and to one another as an example of people in the kingdom of God. Amen!

As God’s children on earth, we are his representatives, sent with a mission to see his purposes carried out in our world. We do so most effectively from a stance of reconciliation, not retaliation.

As children of God we proclaim the gopel message of reconciliation between man and God through the life, death, and resurrection of Christ. Grace poured out upon sinners who did not deserve it.

What better way to live out this truth of reconciliation amongst us, as Christ reconciled us to God and gave us the ministry of reconiliation. Amen!

Reconciliation is the complete circle back to a fully restored relationship. It is restoring the connection that was broken by the act of forgivenesss, leading to reconciliation, which leads to a restored relationship, and fellowship/partnership with one another.

Paul dearly wanted this to happen, and for it to happen at a much greater level than the relationship Philemon and Onesimus had before.Paul stood as the mediator, having putting the ministry of reconciliation not only between man and God, but also among brothers in Christ.

From a slave to a dear brother. Amen! This must be the goal and this must be the aim.

Paul wanted to see reconciliation take place between Onesimus and Philemon, and was willing to sacrifice all that it took to ensure this could take place to the best of his ability. He was willing to pay any debt that was owed in order they could be reconciled and relationship restored in a greater extent than before. From a slave to a dear brother. Amen!

Philemon 18-19 “If he has done you any wrong or owes you anything, charge it to me. I, Paul, am writing this with my own hand. I will pay it back—not to mention that you owe me your very self.”

PAUL WAS WILLING TO SACRIFICE FOR RECONCILIATION TO TAKE PLACE

Especially among borthers and sisters in Christ, we must always strive for reconciliation. This will be putting the gospel on full display - where God was reconciling the world to himself in Christ, not counting people’s sins against them.

Likewise, are we willing to stand in the gap for our brothers and sisters in Christ, ready to make sacrifices to see reconciliation take place?

Reconciliation may not always be possible

In the ministry of reconciliation, not all are restored to Christ. We may declare the forgiveness of Christ, and the reconciliation that is available for all, but many may reject this forgiveness and reconcilation to God. It is the same in our lives as well.

The reason for this is that forgiveness is something that comes from your heart as an individual, whereas for reconciliation, it takes two to reconcile. Unless both parties are willing to reconcile, reconciliation cannot happen.

For reconciliation to take place, Philemon also must be willing, just as Onesimus is willing.

Onesimus was willing to come back to Philemon his master to REPENT from his wrongdoing, and now it required Philemon to FORGIVE, for true reconciliation to take place.

When we are serioulsy hurt by someone, we are often very resistant of reconciling with the one who has hurt us and wronged us.

As children of God, we must always be open to the posibility of reconciling with our offender. Sometimes it may not be possible and other times when there is an opporunity we should seek it.

Some reasons that reconciliation may not be possibe are:

When the party who has wronged you is unwilling to repent and seek forgiveness, or accept your repentance

When the one how has wronged you keeps repenting and reconciling only, becoming a pattern whereby their repentance / change is only temporary and eventually the sin keeps happening

Where someone has caused such great harm and hurt, that there is forgiveness, but reconciliation may not be fully possible, i.e.

Abusive marriages or relationships (physically and mentally),

If you fear the person who has wronged you

If someone is being manipulative, etc.

and many such cases like these.

The truth of the matter is: WE MUST NEVER LOOK FOR EXCUSES NOT TO MAKE WAY FOR RECONILIATION.

All other options must be exhausted before giving up on reconiliation.

Conclusion

We are like Onesimus

God created you and I to serve Him. He is your rightful owner and master. But, like Onesimus, at one time, you rebelled against Him. You said, “I will not have this Master to rule over me.”

And so you took all that Christ has blessed you with, your body, the intelligence, the talents that God had entrusted to you to use for Him and instead you used it for self gain and often spending them on yourselves.

Thinking and Claiming to be free from God, and running from Him to do your own things - you instead became the slave of sin.

Like Onesimus:

you were on the run, running away from God seeking our freedom from His rule and authority and by doing so we became a slave to sin,

we became useless to your rightful Master, guilty, and indebted to Him.

But even as God had His sovereign hand on Onesimus, so also it is the same for each of us who has salvation in Christ.

While we ran from God in the opposite direction, He by His grace and mercy providentially led you to the wonderful gospel with you, changing your heart, opening your spiritual eyes and gifting your with salvation. Amen!

He sent His One and Only Son to pay the price for my sin and your sin, so that we could be RECONCILED to God.

Jesus Christ our Master and Mediator

We cannot plead our own case, but Christ pleads on our behlaf becoming our mediator and because of His righteousness and His sacrifice in our place. (1 Timothy 2:5-6 “For there is one God and one mediator between God and mankind, the man Christ Jesus, who gave himself as a ransom for all people. This has now been witnessed to at the proper time.”)

We are welcomed as partners with Christ and in fellowship with Him

Philemon 17 “So if you consider me a partner, welcome him as you would welcome me.”

1 Corinthians 1:9 “God is faithful, who has called you into fellowship with his Son, Jesus Christ our Lord.”

Christ paid for all out debts

Philemon 18 “If he has done you any wrong or owes you anything, charge it to me.”

Colossians 2:13-14 “When you were dead in your sins and in the uncircumcision of your flesh, God made you alive with Christ. He forgave us all our sins, having canceled the charge of our legal indebtedness, which stood against us and condemned us; he has taken it away, nailing it to the cross.”

Now He has gifted us with His Holy Spirit that we may live a life pleasing to Him.

How can we apply this to our life?

Do you need to seek forgiveness? - seek God’s grace for help

Do you need to give forgiveness? - seek God’s grace for help

Do you find it difficult to forgive - seek Christ and think of the big story of what He has done for you in light of your small story of what people have done to you, by prayer and prayer support from your family in Christ

Seek reconciliation - try to the best of your ability if possible and be an example of an ambassdor of Christ, in the ministry of reconciliation by the power and help of His Holy Spirit.

Sacrifice for your dear brother and sisters in Christ - As Paul was willing to do all, and pay the debt in place of Onesimus, may we too do all in our ability and sacrifice to see one another restored and reconciled to each other for the glory of God - as we ourselves are minister of this gospel of reconcilation. Amen!!

Ultimate attitude

MAY THE REASON FOR ALL OF THIS BE FOR THE GLORY OF GOD. Amen!