In the Midst of Our Mess

Prayer

People Are Messy

This past week I took some study leave, I went to a retreat center right along Lake Tahoe to be a part of the West Coast Presbyterian Pastors Conference (I have a good friend who’s been a number of years and he invited me to go).

I flew from Columbus to Las Vegas, and then on to Reno - except the first flight got delayed by several hours so I found myself sitting with three other men in the waiting area by the gate, two of whom were friends headed to Vegas, other one was trying to catch the flight to Reno, like me.

One of the guys headed to Vegas, Larry, was very outgoing, so it wasn’t long before we were all talking together - and it turns out I happened to catch the same flight back from Vegas to Columbus as Larry and his buddy, Gary, so we got to talk more.

And because Larry was quite talkative, I learned a lot about his life. He’s a hard worker - works three jobs, does a ton of officiating sports - baseball, football, basketball, volleyball - one of those guys who’ll just ump game after game at baseball tournaments.

You can make good money doing that - and he does. But he loses a lot of money, too, because his one vice (according to Larry) is gambling (hence the trip to Vegas). Larry goes often enough - and spends enough money - he’ll get his rooms comped. He actually did really well this trip - hit several jackpots (apparently if you win at least $1200 at a slot machine, that’s a jackpot). His sister had come out as well and he gave her $4,000 of his winnings to take home so he wouldn’t gamble it away.

Larry’s divorced, had to move to another neighborhood because the house he was living in - that his daughter would stay with him, kept getting broken into. He’s also behind on his child support payments. I told you, he’s quite talkative.

It was fascinating to hear him talk about his week in Vegas - feeling the high of winning (it’d been a while), but also how depression would hit, too, when he would be losing.

All that, and he told me the story of his friend who lost half a million dollars in six months gambling - his wife left him because he was verbally abusive, now she’s in a lesbian relationship, so drinking and gambling became two ways to deal with the pain. Talking to these random people in the airport, I was reminded that people’s lives are, to say the least, messy.

And we in the church aren’t excluded from that. At the pastors’ retreat I got to know several of the folks there, including some of the messiness of their lives - pastor whose wife (now ex-wife) committed adultery with several men, at least one of whom was in the church, another pastor has a seventeen year old daughter who’s trying out different pronouns, he’s trying to figure out how to manage that.

People are messy. We are messy - I suspect the more we dug into each other’s lives, learning about our own situations and families and families, there’d be no shortage of brokenness there. We all have our “unspoken” prayer requests.

We’re in good company -because the Bible is full of the stories of messy people. Sometimes those people get referred to as Bible heroes - but lots of what those people did was far from heroic. If that hasn’t been plainly evident from the stories we’ve looked at so far in Genesis, it will be today. It’s helpful to remember that these are God’s chosen people.

Last Sunday we looked at Genesis 32, and the story of Jacob, now Israel, and his wrestling match with God, just as he was about to face his brother, Esau, whom Jacob had betrayed by stealing the blessing their father, Isaac, was going to give Esau. Esau had vowed to kill Jacob.

And since we’re jumping forward a bit, you should know that God was merciful and had blessed Esau richly and he no longer held a grudge against Jacob. Their reunion, much to Jacob’s relief, was a joyful one.

We’re going to be in Genesis 37 today as we continue our journey through the Old Testament, through the book of Genesis - so let me give you a few more important details to fill out the story.

Rachel gives birth to one more child (Joseph was her only son), but tragically, she dies during childbirth. With her dying breath she names the baby, a son, Ben-Oni, which means “son of my trouble.” But Jacob changes the name to Benjamin, son of my right hand. So Jacob now as twelve sons (that number should ring a bell for you…).

Some time after that, Isaac dies, so we start moving to the next generation. To recap the generations: we started with Abraham and Sarah, then Isaac and Rebekah, then Jacob and his wives, Leah and Rachel, and now the narrative shifts to Jacob’s sons - in particular, Joseph. We’re going to see a lot of messiness going on.

Genesis 37, Unbrotherly Love

Genesis 37:1-4, Jacob lived in the land where his father had stayed, the land of Canaan. This is the account of Jacob’s family line. Joseph, a young man of seventeen, was tending the flocks with his brothers, the sons of Bilhah and the sons of Zilpah, his father’s wives, and he brought their father a bad report about them. Now Israel loved Joseph more than any of his other sons, because he had been born to him in his old age; and he made an ornate robe for him. When his brothers saw that their father loved him more than any of them, they hated him and could not speak a kind word to him.

So, how’s that for an introduction to Jacob’s family line?! Let’s just stop a moment here and note some of the family dynamics - we have Joseph, seventeen years old, second to youngest - and he is the favored child: “Israel loved Joseph more than any of his other sons.”

And the favoritism was open and obvious, unabashed - Joseph gets the fancy robe (little note here, scholars aren’t sure what the word describing this coat actually means, so it’s a guess - multi-colored or long or ornate). It’s clear about the coat is that it sets Joseph apart from his brothers.

Then we have Joseph giving bad report about his brothers. Was he being a snitch? Did his dad tell him to check on his brothers and report back to him, giving him the supervisory role? Whatever the case it was just more fuel for the fire for his brothers to hate him to the point that they could not speak a kind word to him (ouch!). Dad was unabashed about showing his favoritism toward Joseph, and they were unabashed about showing their contempt for him. By the way, the Bible tells us three times that they hate Joseph, just to make sure we get it. One messy family.

So, to make matters worse, this happens: Genesis 37:5-11...Joseph had a dream, and when he told it to his brothers, they hated him all the more. He said to them, “Listen to this dream I had: We were binding sheaves of grain out in the field when suddenly my sheaf rose and stood upright, while your sheaves gathered around mine and bowed down to it.” His brothers said to him, “Do you intend to reign over us? Will you actually rule us?” And they hated him all the more because of his dream and what he had said. Then he had another dream, and he told it to his brothers. “Listen,” he said, “I had another dream, and this time the sun and moon and eleven stars were bowing down to me.” When he told his father as well as his brothers, his father rebuked him and said, “What is this dream you had? Will your mother and I and your brothers actually come and bow down to the ground before you?” His brothers were jealous of him, but his father kept the matter in mind.

So, Joseph has two dreams, one about the sheaves of grain where all of the sheaves his brothers had bound up all of a sudden gather round Joseph’s sheaf, which had risen up and stood upright, and their sheaves bow down to his. Meaning is clear to everyone - they themselves will one day bow down to Joseph, who will have been risen up above them.

Second dream about the sun and moon and eleven stars all bowing down to Joseph has the same meaning, though this one includes Jacob and Joseph’s mother (that part of the dream is a little unclear since she died giving birth to Benjamin).

No one in the family appreciated hearing about these dreams (by the way, they took dreams very seriously in Ancient Near East, that they contained divine messages). Not sure if Joseph is sharing this out of arrogance or naivete - or something else - but his brothers hate him all the more for it and Jacob rebukes him for sharing dreams that speak of all of them bowing down to them.

But Jacob is wiser than his sons, even though he doesn’t like what the dreams seem to be saying, he’s wise enough to “keep the matter in mind.” He recognizes that this indeed may be from God.

So, the story continues - and I’m just going to summarize here, as it’s a bit lengthy. Israel (Jacob) sends Joseph to his brothers who have taken the flocks elsewhere for grazing. No indication if this is to check on them, or bring them provisions, maybe both. Anyway, they’re days away and he finally catches up to them.

And as they see him approaching, that hatred they’ve been harboring stirs up within them and they plot to kill that dreamer…“then we’ll see what comes of his dreams” - after all, how can they end up bowing down to him if he’s dead?

But Reuben (the oldest), argues against that and talks them into throwing him into a cistern - from which he hoped to rescue him and take Joseph back to his father.

So Joseph comes, they grab him, strip him of that robe, that dang robe, and toss him into the cistern. Then they sit down to have lunch (because throwing your brother in a pit always makes you hungry). While they’re eating, their poor brother down in this empty well, a caravan of traders comes along, Ishmaelites (descendants of Ishmael, Abraham’s son through Hagar, Sarah’s maidservant - these are distant cousins), who are taking spices down to Egypt.

Judah has the bright idea to sell their brother into slavery, vs. 26-27 - “What will we gain if we kill our brother and cover up his blood? (notice most of them still planned to kill him). Come, let’s sell him to the Ishmaelites and not lay our hands on him; after all he is our brother, our own flesh and blood.” His brothers agreed.

Don’t you like how, in spite of the fact that at least some of the brothers still planned on killing him, now that they can make a buck off of him, and still get rid of him - they speak as if they’re being so generous - after all, he is our brother, our own flesh and blood.

So, they sell him for 20 shekels (quick side note, this was one of our Unearthing the Bible artifacts, the law code of Hammurabi, where it speaks of the price of a slave at about that time, 20 shekels of silver, about 8 ounces.)

Reuben apparently was not with them when all this goes down, and he’s distraught that Joseph has been sold to these traders making their way down to Egypt. In spite of this, he goes along with the plan to dip Joseph’s coat in goat’s blood and tell Jacob that they found this coat and ask him if its Joseph’s?

That’s exactly what they do, and Jacob is devastated by the news, Genesis 37:34-35…Then Jacob tore his clothes, put on sackcloth and mourned for his son many days. All his sons and daughters came to comfort him, but he refused to be comforted. “No,” he said, “I will continue to mourn until I join my son in the grave.” So his father wept for him.

I want you to picture that for a moment - it says a lot about the family - Jacob, again, unabashedly showing his favoritism, refusing to be comforted by them, I’ll mourn until I die, my life is over now that this son, this particular son, is dead. And the brothers who are the cause of that suffering - out of their hatred they sold Joseph, here they are trying to comfort him for the loss they brought about. Jacob rejects their attempts to love him. These messy people are God’s people, ones he’s chosen to make a great nation out of, a nation that will bless all other nations.

One last note on the story - we learn that Joseph is taken to Egypt and sold to Potiphar, one of the Pharaoh’s officials, the captain of the guard. More on that next week.

So what do we do with this story, all this messiness - blatant favoritism, jealousy, murderous hatred, betrayal, deceit, rejection?

Strangely enough, it’s because we have the capacity to be so good, to achieve great things - to reflect God’s likeness, his very character - is precisely why, when it goes bad, it gets really messy. What do I mean by that?

C.S. Lewis: When we have understood free will, we shall see how silly it is to ask, as somebody once asked me, ‘Why did God make a creature of such rotten stuff that it went wrong?’  The better stuff a creature is made of—the cleverer and stronger and freer it is—then the better it will be if it goes right, but also the worse it will be if it goes wrong.  A cow cannot be very good or very bad; a dog can be both better and worse; a child better and worse still; an ordinary man, still more so; a man of genius, still more so; a superhuman spirit best—or worst—of all.

Do you see what Lewis is saying here - the more capacity a creature has (thinking, its strength, its freedom to act) - if that goes well, its beautiful and wonderful and manifests the good God created that creature for. But when it goes wrong, it’s bad. That’s why humans can do such horrific things to one another, far worse than animals - because we are capable of such great good.

It’s what we see in this story - plotting to kill your own brother, selling him into slavery. Messiness in our own lives - gambling our money away, being verbally abusive, adultery, sexual confusion, judgmental, contempt - the list goes on.

And at the same time, the amazing beautiful and good things people do every day - people who pour themselves out to provide care for someone who can no longer care for themselves, I mentioned the pastor whose wife committed adultery - people who walked alongside him when his world fell apart, picking up some of his responsibilities to give him time to heal. I can’t help but think about Capernaum camp - all the work crew and summer staff, who’d volunteered to be there, leaders walking alongside and just being with their Capernaum friends - to see their faces of joy at being so welcomed and celebrated.

This is what Jesus came to do - to make us new. To move us from being such messy creatures to those formed in his likeness, those willing to give our lives for the sake of others, as Jesus gave his life for the sake of the world.

When you stop to consider the messiness of our lives, it makes it all the more amazing, more beautiful, Jesus’ willingness to come down not simply to be with us in the midst of our mess, but as one of us, as human. God could have easily stayed up in heaven, distant, away from it all...”get your act together down there” and then, turning to the angels, “I don’t like to get too close, they’re a bit of a mess.” Instead, he moved right into our midst, to love us, up close - in all of our messiness.

I remember years ago a speaker describing his role as a parent, when his child got sick in the middle of the night, and had thrown up, and it was all over them, and they were reaching out, wanting his comfort. His instinctive reaction was to keep the child at arm’s length - let’s get you cleaned up first. How different that is from God who embraces us in all our messiness. Loves us, receives us - as his own…then, let’s get you cleaned up.

Jacob and all his sons - they were God’s chosen people, as messy as they were. And as we’ll see, God worked in and through them. And as messy as we are, we belong to Jesus, too. Jesus wants to form us into people who are living out that capacity for good, who are like him - for the life of the world.

Spiritual Direction, Our Messiness is at heart, a lack of love - not loving God, not loving others. Which is exactly what we saw in Jacob’s family, Jacob not loving his other sons as well as Joseph. In their pain, they became full of hatred and jealousy for Joseph.

Letting Jesus into our messiness in order to shape us into people who love well - this is the discipline of confession, of repentance, which we put into practice every week here in worship. This should be our goal, is to become, day by day, people who love - God above all else, and second, our neighbor as ourselves.

Make this a daily practice - to be especially attentive (through the guidance of the Holy Spirit), of your love for others. Are you favoring some - therefore neglecting others? Maybe there’s just indifference - others simply don’t matter to you. Harboring jealousy? Bitterness, hatred? Some of us have a hard time acknowledging those things in us because we see ourselves as “nice” people - but we all carry that. Invite Jesus into the messiness of your heart, asking him to work in you to become someone who loves well.

Second practice I was to encourage you in - willingness to move into the messiness of others, to love others in the name of Jesus.

Opportunities here: Neighborhood Dinners - be intentional about engaging with those who come, meet and have a conversation with three kids - think if all of us did that!. Or come over to neighborhood, take a prayer walk. Or Capernaum ministry (come visit club, make the commitment to help - one Saturday a month).

Maybe it’s someone whose already in your life - a family member, a neighbor, a co-worker, you know is having a rough time, making bad choices. Just start by being a friend to them. Listening, committing to pray for them. Pray for opportunities, trust this is God’s work.

Because it is God’s work. This is gospel work, this is what Jesus came to do, to be with us as one of us, to move into our messiness, to share his life and love with us, dying on the cross, so that we could be made new. Really is amazing - it would have been so easy for God to look down on us - they’re a mess, forget them. But he loves us too much. He wants to make us people who love that same way.