Forgiveness

Unconditional Forgiveness: What Does It Mean? What does unilateral forgiveness entail? If there’s no transaction, no seeking of forgiveness, no formal granting of pardon, no words exchanged between the two parties, then what exactly is accomplished by this sort of forgiveness? Its chief effects are wrought in the heart of the forgiver. This kind of forgiveness involves a deliberate decision to cover the other person’s offense. “Forgive” in Mark 11:25 is an imperative, a command. The forgiveness called for here is necessarily a volitional matter. In other words, it is a choice, not a feeling or an involuntary response. It is, as Matthew 18:35 suggests, from the heart; but even that does not place forgiveness primarily in the realm of feeling. “Heart” in Scripture normally designates the seat of the intellect (cf. Prov. 23:7; Luke 9:47). So this speaks of a deliberate and rational decision. It is a choice made by the offended party to set aside the other person’s transgression and not permit the offense to cause a breach in the relationship or fester in bitterness. In effect, the person who chooses to forgive resolves not to remember the offense, refuses to hold a grudge, relinquishes any claim on recompense, and resists the temptation to brood or retaliate. The offended party simply bears the insult. The offense is set aside, lovingly covered for Christ’s sake. For petty and unintentional offenses, this is the proper and loving way to forgive—unilaterally, without confrontation and without stirring any strife. This, I believe, is what Scripture refers to most often when it calls us to forgive one another. The heavy emphasis on forgiveness in Scripture is not meant to make us more confrontational, but quite the opposite. When Scripture calls us to have an attitude of forgiveness, the emphasis is always on long-suffering, patience, benevolence, forbearance, kindness, and mercy—not confrontation.

Mark 11:25 “And when ye stand praying, forgive, if ye have ought against any: that your Father also which is in heaven may forgive you your trespasses.”

Matt 18:35 “So likewise shall my heavenly Father do also unto you, if ye from your hearts forgive not every one his brother their trespasses.”

Prov 23:7 “For as he thinketh in his heart, so is he: Eat and drink, saith he to thee; But his heart is not with thee.”

Luke9:47-48Luke9:47-48 “And Jesus, perceiving the thought of their heart, took a child, and set him by him, And said unto them, Whosoever shall receive this child in my name receiveth me: and whosoever shall receive me receiveth him that sent me: for he that is least among you all, the same shall be great.”

MacArthur, J. F. (1998). The freedom and power of forgiveness (electronic ed., p. 122). Crossway Books.

When It Is Hard to Forgive

Forgiveness certainly does not come naturally to fallen creatures. We tend to be driven too much by our feelings. Those who indulge themselves in bitter feelings will find forgiveness does not easily germinate in such soil. Instead, the root that springs up is a defiling influence. It is hurtful not only to the bitter person, but to many others as well (Heb. 12:15). Forgiveness is often frustrated by negative emotions, lingering resentment, and unquenched anger. Some imagine, wrongly, that they cannot forgive if they do not “feel” like forgiving. But as we already noted briefly, forgiveness is not a feeling. Those who insist on being driven by passion will find forgiveness very hard indeed, because forgiveness often involves a deliberate choice that runs contrary to our feelings. Bitter emotions tell us to dwell on an offense. In contrast, forgiveness is a voluntary, rational decision to set the offense aside and desire only the best for the offender

MacArthur, J. F. (1998). The freedom and power of forgiveness (electronic ed., pp. 135–136). Crossway Books.

Those who forgive even when it’s hard invariably find that the proper emotions will follow. “Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you” (Luke 6:27–28)—those are all willful, deliberate, rational acts, not emotional reflexes. Obey Christ’s commands to do such things, and your anger will eventually give way to meekness, frustration will be overcome by peace, and anxiety will succumb to calm. Forgiveness results in the lifting of many burdens. To grant someone forgiveness when he or she repents is to lift the burden of guilt from that person. But to forgive when forgiveness is unilateral and unconditional liberates the forgiver to enjoy the even greater mercies given in return by a generous heavenly Father, who promises to pour into our laps a “good measure, pressed down, shaken together, running over” (Luke 6:38).

MacArthur, J. F. (1998). The freedom and power of forgiveness (electronic ed., p. 136). Crossway Books.

Heb 12:15 “Looking diligently lest any man fail of the grace of God; lest any root of bitterness springing up trouble you, and thereby many be defiled;”

Luke 6:27-28

27 But I say unto you which hear, Love your enemies, do good to them which hate you, 28 Bless them that curse you, and pray for them which despitefully use you

The Holy Bible: King James Version (Electronic Edition of the 1900 Authorized Version., Lk 6:27–28). (2009). Logos Research Systems, Inc.

Luke 6:38 “Give, and it shall be given unto you; good measure, pressed down, and shaken together, and running over, shall men give into your bosom. For with the same measure that ye mete withal it shall be measured to you again.”