God's Will for Your Relationships
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Last week we began a series, “What is God’s Will for ME?
Today is mother’s day, and I thought the best fitting theme for today would be “God’s will for your relationships.”
We also celebrated a wedding yesterday which goes along with that.
As we begin today, let’s pray.
We will start by looking at the story of a mother in Scripture.
Hannah in 1 Samuel
We summarized her story when we went through 1 Samuel, but today we look at it closer.
There was a certain man of Ramathaim-zophim of the hill country of Ephraim whose name was Elkanah the son of Jeroham, son of Elihu, son of Tohu, son of Zuph, an Ephrathite.
He had two wives. The name of the one was Hannah, and the name of the other, Peninnah. And Peninnah had children, but Hannah had no children.
Now this man used to go up year by year from his city to worship and to sacrifice to the Lord of hosts at Shiloh, where the two sons of Eli, Hophni and Phinehas, were priests of the Lord.
On the day when Elkanah sacrificed, he would give portions to Peninnah his wife and to all her sons and daughters.
But to Hannah he gave a double portion, because he loved her, though the Lord had closed her womb.
And her rival used to provoke her grievously to irritate her, because the Lord had closed her womb.
So it went on year by year. As often as she went up to the house of the Lord, she used to provoke her. Therefore Hannah wept and would not eat.
And Elkanah, her husband, said to her, “Hannah, why do you weep? And why do you not eat? And why is your heart sad? Am I not more to you than ten sons?”
After they had eaten and drunk in Shiloh, Hannah rose. Now Eli the priest was sitting on the seat beside the doorpost of the temple of the Lord.
She was deeply distressed and prayed to the Lord and wept bitterly.
And she vowed a vow and said, “O Lord of hosts, if you will indeed look on the affliction of your servant and remember me and not forget your servant, but will give to your servant a son, then I will give him to the Lord all the days of his life, and no razor shall touch his head.”
As she continued praying before the Lord, Eli observed her mouth.
Hannah was speaking in her heart; only her lips moved, and her voice was not heard. Therefore Eli took her to be a drunken woman.
And Eli said to her, “How long will you go on being drunk? Put your wine away from you.”
But Hannah answered, “No, my lord, I am a woman troubled in spirit. I have drunk neither wine nor strong drink, but I have been pouring out my soul before the Lord.
Do not regard your servant as a worthless woman, for all along I have been speaking out of my great anxiety and vexation.”
Then Eli answered, “Go in peace, and the God of Israel grant your petition that you have made to him.”
And she said, “Let your servant find favor in your eyes.” Then the woman went her way and ate, and her face was no longer sad.
They rose early in the morning and worshiped before the Lord; then they went back to their house at Ramah. And Elkanah knew Hannah his wife, and the Lord remembered her.
And in due time Hannah conceived and bore a son, and she called his name Samuel, for she said, “I have asked for him from the Lord.”
The man Elkanah and all his house went up to offer to the Lord the yearly sacrifice and to pay his vow.
But Hannah did not go up, for she said to her husband, “As soon as the child is weaned, I will bring him, so that he may appear in the presence of the Lord and dwell there forever.”
Elkanah her husband said to her, “Do what seems best to you; wait until you have weaned him; only, may the Lord establish his word.” So the woman remained and nursed her son until she weaned him.
And when she had weaned him, she took him up with her, along with a three-year-old bull, an ephah of flour, and a skin of wine, and she brought him to the house of the Lord at Shiloh. And the child was young.
Then they slaughtered the bull, and they brought the child to Eli.
And she said, “Oh, my lord! As you live, my lord, I am the woman who was standing here in your presence, praying to the Lord.
For this child I prayed, and the Lord has granted me my petition that I made to him.
Therefore I have lent him to the Lord. As long as he lives, he is lent to the Lord.” And he worshiped the Lord there.
A Case Study on Relationships
A Case Study on Relationships
Explain story and the relationships involved.
Hannah - A distraught woman
Hardships and difficulties
Both helped and hurt by those around her.
Those we love
Elkanah - A caring husband
Those who don’t love us
Peninnah - A wicked companion
Shows the problems with polygamy.
The bible is often descriptive, not prescriptive.
Those we have been entrusted with
Eli - A caring bystander
Samuel - A blessing from the Lord.
Relationships are Essential, Powerful, Gifts from God
Relationships are Essential, Powerful, Gifts from God
The relationships that we have are essential, powerful, gifts from God.
Let’s look first at why they are essential.
Then the Lord God said, “It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper fit for him.”
We are not made to live in isolation.
We can see this by what is considered to be the worst punishment: Solitary confinement.
From the very moment we are born we need people to come into our lives and help us.
At the end of our lives, we also rely on the care of others.
It is the part in the middle that sometimes it takes convincing that we do truly need one another.
Some people like to fancy themselves loners.
This idea simply masks the reality that we were created for community.
This is a truth that people can run from, but it is a truth that is essential to become all that God has created you to be.
We were created for community. To build others up, and to be built up by others.
This is why relationships are also powerful.
Do not be deceived: “Bad company ruins good morals.”
Whoever walks with the wise becomes wise, but the companion of fools will suffer harm.
The community that we have, the people that we associate with will affect us tremendously.
This does not mean that you cannot or should not associate with people who aren’t perfect. If you did that, you would be alone.
Rather it means that you need to choose you community carefully.
Who are the people who are influencing you? What are they influencing you toward?
We are all being influenced and changed.
It is like hanging out in the sun too long without any sunscreen. You are going to get burned.
Your environment has an affect on you whether you like it or not.
I have seen first hand people come from identical situations, but have drastically different outcomes because of the people that they associated with and the decisions that led to them making.
We should also recognize that relationships are gifts from God.
Conduit of God’s Mercy and Grace
A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for adversity.
God will use our relationships to bless us.
To encourage us.
To lift us up.
To show us his grace.
God’s method of development.
Iron sharpens iron, and one man sharpens another.
Nearly everything that you have learned, you learned from someone.
Even the things you taught yourself, you used the skills and abilities others taught you to do so.
Relationships are A Responsibility
Relationships are A Responsibility
The power of our Relationships.
The Power to hurt
With it we bless our Lord and Father, and with it we curse people who are made in the likeness of God.
From the same mouth come blessing and cursing. My brothers, these things ought not to be so.
Explain
The power to help.
A man of many companions may come to ruin, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother.
IE Jonathan and David.
What relationships have you been entrusted with?
Marriage?
Children?
Friendships?
Family Relationships?
How are you doing in these relationships?
These relationships are your responsibility. They are essential, powerful gifts from God that you have the responsibility of handling appropriately.
How are you doing?
LET US AVOID THE SPIRIT OF CAIN
For this is the message that you have heard from the beginning, that we should love one another.
We should not be like Cain, who was of the evil one and murdered his brother. And why did he murder him? Because his own deeds were evil and his brother’s righteous.
Do not be surprised, brothers, that the world hates you.
We know that we have passed out of death into life, because we love the brothers. Whoever does not love abides in death.
Everyone who hates his brother is a murderer, and you know that no murderer has eternal life abiding in him.
How do you respond to bad things in your life?
If you are like Cain and experience rejection because you make poor choices, where do you place the blame? What does it cause you to do?
IT SHOULD motivate you to change.
The Lord said to Cain, “Why are you angry, and why has your face fallen?
If you do well, will you not be accepted? And if you do not do well, sin is crouching at the door. Its desire is contrary to you, but you must rule over it.”
IT SHOULD NOT cause you to act out and hurt others.
Cain spoke to Abel his brother. And when they were in the field, Cain rose up against his brother Abel and killed him.
Then the Lord said to Cain, “Where is Abel your brother?” He said, “I do not know; am I my brother’s keeper?”
And the Lord said, “What have you done? The voice of your brother’s blood is crying to me from the ground.
To go even further. When you have been hurt by others, how do you react?
YOU SHOULD seek healing.
YOU SHOULD NOT in turn hurt others.
A child that hurts their ankle and limps in exaggeration for all to see. Making sure all know about and are affected by their affliction.
An adult that appropriately treats it and gets better.
If you act out in relationships out of hurt or to hurt, that is sin.
Instead....
LET US SEEK THE SPIRIT OF CHRIST!
Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves.
Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others.
We seek to live like Christ did, and love one another.
Christ laid aside glory, to take on flesh.
Christ took on flesh.
Christ was a servant.
Christ went to the cross.
Christ has been glorified.
Following his example.
We lay aside our right.
We bear one another’s burdens
We serve one another.
We suffer with and for one another.
If you have listened to this sermon, and thought to yourself - “Man I sure hope so-and-so was listening today” - this sermon was for you.
The only party we can control in our relationships is ourselves. When we love in the way Christ has called us to, he will work and convict and move in the hearts of others.
We call out and edify when appropriate, but we must always first make certain that our motives are pure and from a place that is Christ-like.
We make sure we don’t have the plank in our eye, before we go looking for specks.
WHAT DO YOU NEED TO DO?