Wedding Homily - Class

Thank you all for gathering here today to celebrate Carter and Caroline’s marriage. So, this evening, look with me at Psalm 23.

The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want. He makes me lie down in green pastures. He leads me beside still waters. He restores my soul. He leads me in paths of righteousness for his name's sake.

Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me.

You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies; you anoint my head with oil; my cup overflows. Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life, and I shall dwell in the house of the Lord forever.

Now look with me at Matthew 18:12-14

Matthew 18:12-14 What do you think? If a man has a hundred sheep, and one of them has gone astray, does he not leave the ninety-nine on the mountains and go in search of the one that went astray? And if he finds it, truly, I say to you, he rejoices over it more than over the ninety-nine that never went astray. So it is not the will of my Father who is in heaven that one of these little ones should perish.

I once had a conversation with a man about marriage. Now this was months ago before I got engaged, but I was getting close to popping the question. And he asked me what all I thought love is, and Ill get to that in a minute, but he interrupted me and told me love is commitment and that’s it. Love is choosing to be married to a person even if they become unlovable. And it sounds good, to some extent, but it left a sour taste in my mouth. Is that all love it? Choosing to tolerate another human under your own roof?

I left that earlier conversation troubled and upset. Is that all marriage is? Coexistenc But lets look at what God calls us to in marriage, in Ephesians chapter 5 God tells us that marriage is much like Christ’s relationship with his people. And oh how our God loves us. “Husbands love your wives, AS CHRIST LOVED THE CHURCH.” Well, Christ died for the church. Christ sought us out when we were unlovable and lost.

Looking back at Psalm 23 and Matthew 18, we see exactly how God loves his people. Christ says that God seeks after his lost sheep, that he wants to save us, to be our God. He doesn’t just choose to coexist with us, though he did, he came to seek and save us. Psalm 23 says that he He leads me beside still waters, that He restores my soul, that Goodness and Mercy shall follow us, that our cup overflows. Matthew 18 says that He rejoices when one is saved. That doesn’t sound like coexistence to me.

On the other side of the coin, in todays world you hear so much about LOVEEEE. You hear about the feelings, the swell of the orchestra when you see that person walk in a room. And again, it sounds good, but it doesn’t quite sound right.

We see God make covenants with his people time and time again. With Adam, with David, with Noah and Abraham. Now for those of you who don’t know what a covenant is, its sort of a contract in the ancient middle eastern areas. And God chose to make covenants with his people, these contracts. And we see Him make this new covenant with his people, us, one of our redemption and salvation. Now, does God still rejoice when we come to him? Absolutely, but he also has this contract with his people, that he will save us. Does that mean there are no feelings? Not at all, but it does mean there is that commitment aspect.

So where is the middle ground here? Clearly God doesn’t just commit to us, and clearly he isn’t just about feelings, I mean He’s God. Well, to pull out a little bit of Christianese that we was popular about 15 years ago, God pursues us.

Now, pursuit is absolutely commitment, but its also the re joicing. Its chasing down the unlovable and loving them anyways. That doesn’t stop at willfully existing under the same roof.

And pursuit is absolutely feelings but its also choosing that person. We were once completely unlovable and God not only chose us, but chased us down and brought us home.

So that is my charge today, Christ came and died for us. He wants you to be part of his family, so follow him, pursue him.

Now Carter and Caroline, you too were once unlovable and yet Christ loved you. And now you are called to love and honor each other as Christ loves his people, like you. You two are filled with the Holy Spirit, you are made in God’s image, and as Ephesians says, you are, in your marriage, emulating how Christ loves his people. So, to paraphrase RC Sproul, when you don’t pursue each other, you tell the whole world, this is what God does, he doesn’t pursue his people.

So, when feelings feel dry, pursue each other. When someone is unlovable, pursue each other. Don’t just choose each other, don’t just rely on feelings, but actually lean into this covenant that you are making today, knowing that it is secure, and just pursue each other regardless of what’s going on, love each other like Christ loves you.