Everybody is Doing It, Why Can't I

The Mythical Dragon Called ‘Everybody’

One of the conflicts that I remember discussing at the table when I was a middle schooler was my desire to be like the rest of the kids at the school. I wanted to watch what they watched. I wanted to dress the way they dressed. I wanted to say what they said. And, what often came out of my mouth was “everybody is doing it, why can’t I?”

Maybe you remember the same dilemma or maybe you are having some of the same conversations in your home. For my childhood I remember it being about TV shows that I couldn’t watch but the rest of the class were discussing it. I remember learning words that I later learned were not acceptable in my home (reinforced with a soapy tongue). I remember hanging out with people in school and around my home that were not good influences. Hey, everybody was doing it, why couldn’t I?

My parents were quick to point out that the mythical dragon of ‘everybody’ apparently didn’t include me. Those things might have been okay for the rest of the school, but I was not allowed to join the ‘everybody’ group. Apparently, I was different.

We ARE Different

From the first pages to the last pages of the Bible we are told that we, as Christians, are different from the rest of the world around us. It is just that simple. As the nation of Israel was founded, they were told that they were not to use the nation of Egypt or any of the nations they would find as examples for their way of living.

Leviticus 18:1–3 NIV

The Lord said to Moses, “Speak to the Israelites and say to them: ‘I am the Lord your God. You must not do as they do in Egypt, where you used to live, and you must not do as they do in the land of Canaan, where I am bringing you. Do not follow their practices.

Jesus told everyone who was listening to him that they had to accept that they were supposed to be similar to salt and light. As light they could not be hidden. Their lives should reflect the goodness of Jesus.

Matthew 5:14–16 NIV

“You are the light of the world. A town built on a hill cannot be hidden. Neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl. Instead they put it on its stand, and it gives light to everyone in the house. In the same way, let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven.

Romans 12:2 NIV

Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.

The pressure to conform to the world doesn’t end when we leave school. We are tempted to conform in the way we think and in the things that we do. How often do we see how close we can get to sin without being stained from sin? How much can I behave like the world without becoming the world? These are temptations that we will struggle with regardless of how old we are.

‘Everybody’ Doesn’t Include the Christ Follower

Culture Today Says “YOLO”, Christians Live for Eternity

“You only live once” is apparently the current battle cry of the youth. Young people who are celebrating YOLO might be shocked to learn that their philosophy of life goes back at least to the days of Isaiah when the prophet scolded Israel for this mentality.

Isaiah 22:13–14 NIV

But see, there is joy and revelry, slaughtering of cattle and killing of sheep, eating of meat and drinking of wine! “Let us eat and drink,” you say, “for tomorrow we die!” The Lord Almighty has revealed this in my hearing: “Till your dying day this sin will not be atoned for,” says the Lord, the Lord Almighty.

Contemporary youth might be shocked to learn that the idea of YOLO was embraced by the Greek philosopher, Epicurus.

How is YOLO Wrong?

I recently saw a graphic that pointed out the fallacy of this statement. YOLO ignores heaven and hell.

When I was a teenager, the biggest question about sex was ‘how far is too far?’ Today, that is not the question of the culture. Today’s question is ‘If another person is okay with it, what prevents us from doing it?’ The answer, of course, is a higher morality that is given to us from God. The world is only interested in their own desires. Check out this suggestion by Epicurus:

“Chocolate is good. Chocolate is very pleasurable. But, tasting it once, you may never be able taste it again, and that will bring you suffering and pain, so its best to not taste chocolate all.” Epicurus would say, “Eat broccoli rob or Kale instead. The pain inflicted by eating Broccoli rob or Kale is momentary and will pass quickly, and that will please you, unlike the pain of never having chocolate again, which stays with you forever.

If a person follows their own passions and pleasures, he can never get enough “chocolate”. Man’s pursuit of his own pleasure only brings eventual pain. The Christian is interested in God’s desires. His will.

People have 2 irreconcilable opinions of themselves: self-love and self-hate. The National Institute of Health has been tracking opinions of 12thgraders since 1977. Since 2010 the 4 questions on the subject of self-derogation, “I don’t know why I’m here” or “Sometimes I feel no good at all”, have shot up like the handle of a hockey stick. People are experiencing high levels of self-love and, at the same time, experiencing high levels of self-hate. This is what happens when YOLO becomes the ideal of a culture.

There was a disturbing experiment done on puppies decades ago. Puppies were placed in a box and were given an electrical shock. The puppies jumped out of the box, of course. But what would happen in they were also shocked on the outside of the box? Researchers found out that the puppies would simply lie down and give up. This is the ultimate outcome of extreme self-love and extreme self-derogation. The conflict is too much to handle. If your compass always points to yourself, you will always be lost!

Table Talk Lessons About YOLO

#1 – God designed us for eternity

#2 – Pursuing my own pleasure only results in hopelessness

#3 – The compass for the Christian is stated this way

Mark 12:29–31 NIV

“The most important one,” answered Jesus, “is this: ‘Hear, O Israel: The Lord our God, the Lord is one. Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength.’ The second is this: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ There is no commandment greater than these.”

Culture Today Looks to Escape, Christians Are Called to Engage

What Do We Need to Understand About Escapism?

I admit that this issue will be very similar to the heart behind YOLO. Escapism is just as self-centered. Escapism is about our own comforts. It even bleeds into our faith. It is possible today to filter search for a church that confirms your faith. In recent news 193 congregations left the United Methodist Church over issues of Christian truth on the authority of Scripture, sanctity of life, and God’s design for marriage and sexuality. I would agree they should have but what made the United Methodist Church adopt radical ideas about denying the authority of Scripture, supporting abortion, condoning same sex marriages and the LGBTQ+ lifestyles? Escapism.

It doesn’t stop within the Methodist denomination. People are constantly looking for a church that will confirm their faith, instead of finding a Bible teaching church that will challenge their personal beliefs through examination of the Word of God. Today’s culture wants God to be our assistant. Dr. Jeff Myers puts it this way,

“There is still kind of an escape mentality among a lot of young believers. They are looking for a comfortable life. They are looking for a life with no trouble. They kind of make a deal with God. ‘I will be good. You don’t hurt me.’ And they haven’t gone a lot deeper than that in their faith. So, they tend to look for confirming evidence mostly. If they hear a speaker who says something they agree with, they are happy. Not because they intend to grow but because they don’t intend to grow.”[1]

If we are not careful, we twist the Lord’s Prayer from “Thy will be done” to “my will be done”.

Time to Dust Off a Couple of Terms, “Consecration” and “Sanctification”

Consecration is defined as “Cleansing someone or something from sin and ritual impurity, and then to dedicatingthe person or thing for a specific purpose.”[2]Notice that the word carries with it, 2 parts. Cleansing from sin and ritual impurity and becoming dedicated to a person or a thing for a purpose. Too many Christians understand Christianity to be becoming part of the ‘club’ but are unwilling to stop committing the sins of their lifeless. They want YOLO with Christ.

Alan Redpath had two daughters who loved to swarm him as soon as he came home at night. As he came in the door one evening, his little girls ran to be the first to hug Daddy. One grabbed his leg and hugged him with all of her might. He snatched the other daughter up in his arms.

The girl squeezing her father’s leg said, "Now, I’ve got all of Daddy! And she smirked at her sister.

The daughter in her father’s arms replied, "Well, you may have all of Daddy.....but Daddy has all of me!"

The real issue in our relationship to the Lord is......."Does the Father have all of ME?"

Abba Father needs to have all of us! But He can’t if we aren’t willing to repent of our sinfulness. Our willingness to submit to consecration is a big difference between the world and those who are in Christ.

Sanctification is the devoting or setting apart of anything to the worship or service of God. Sanctification should be an ongoing activity for Christians. It began at salvation but continues through us as we become more and more like Christ.

Romans 6:13 NIV

Do not offer any part of yourself to sin as an instrument of wickedness, but rather offer yourselves to God as those who have been brought from death to life; and offer every part of yourself to him as an instrument of righteousness.

Sanctification is active devotion to God. You chose to be here today. You chose to worship today. You will choose to open your Bibles this week to learn more about God. You have the opportunity to listen and obey the voice of the Holy Spirit.

Table Talk Lessons About Escapism

- You will never find peace until you realize God’s will must be done, not ours.

- Being a part of ‘everybody’ is impossible if we are going to live lives that honor God through consecration and sanctification.

Culture Today Shouts ‘FOMO’, Christians Find Fulfillment in Serving

‘FOMO’ is “Fear of missing out”. During the time that I was struggling with the “everybody is doing it” issue, I was really struggling with making a choice about whether I would believe all the things that I had been taught in Sunday School and heard in church. On one hand there were all the voices in school that seemed to be exploring a world I didn’t understand. On the other hand, I believed in Jesus and in the things that I was learning in church. In fact, it seemed like there was more fun and more life in church than in the world my classmates enjoyed.

I remember that one day I began to sort of walk through the logic. I thought about my classmate’s opinions. I could live any way that I wanted to and satisfy all my desires like Epicurus suggested. That would give me 80 years of pleasure (I thought). On the other hand, I could live for Jesus. I knew that it would require giving up my will for His will. I would have to embrace consecration – cleansing and dedication. As a result, I would have eternity. It seemed like the decision was easy and I have walked that out.

What I didn’t realize back then was that by turning my back on the “everybody is doing it” crowd, I gained:

- A relationship with Jesus

- Fulfillment of purpose and passion in my life

- Benefits of a righteous life

- An awareness of the supernatural

- A fellowship with others who share my values.

- And, yes, a hope of heaven that is undeniable and unquestionable.

I don’t know why everybody isn’t doing it?

[1] Turek, Frank. Crossexamined.org. “How to Culture-Proof the Next Generation” with Jeff Myers. [2]David Witthoff, ed., The Lexham Cultural Ontology Glossary (Bellingham, WA: Lexham Press, 2014).