Glorifying God through our struggles

Yesterday we talked about putting our life and ministry in perspective.

He is God, I am not God.

Who I am is a reflection of Him and I have the privilege of both representing Him and participating with Him in His mission.

That all sounds great! - But sometimes it can be really hard.

Life is hard in a fallen world and when you are working with God to try to change it - the resistance can be intense at times.

We told you about Karie’s service in Tajikistan and In Jordan. You may not be aware that I also began my ministry career as a missionary, but I don’t talk about it much because - honestly- it didn’t go very well.

My late wife Heidi and I served in Denmark as church-planting coworkers with an indigenous Danish Church. My successes were that I was preaching in Danish within my first eight months of being in the country. Our church planting evangelism canvasing produced nine people attending a Bible study and taking their first steps as believers. That’s when it all started to come crashing down.

Within one year we were ready to start a regular “church” meeting in our target area. I was suddenly called into a meeting of the leadership and asked “what do you mean you want to start a church?” I assumed they knew what “church-planting” meant. But it was obvious that they had not counted the cost of time and resources and some on the board felt threatened by what they perceived as competition. They shut it down - not because it was failing, but because it was succeeding.

I spent the next year which we had already committed to working on their small group ministry. Visiting groups and developing some of the first small group discussion materials in Danish. This was 1994 and the idea of small groups was just gaining traction.

I was invited back after a brief furlough to help on a mission ship doing evangelism and that led to helping a church in Hjorring where a Pastor was already leading two churches in neighboring towns. I began to struggle with what the Danes call “winter depression” (Seasonal Affect Disorder). The winter days were dark with only 4-5 hours of sunlight. My sleep patterns were all messed up. My wife would blast praise music to try to get me out of bed.

I prayed that God would help us to fulfill our calling and plant a church before returning home. We were now expecting our second child and we did not have the finances for a family of four. The Pastors in the Northern Region got together and offered to help support us to plant a Church in Skagen - the northern-most point in Denmark. When I prayed about it, I heard the Lord say, “If you plant a church in Skagen, I will bless it, but it might be the last thing you do. You will have more years of productive ministry if you go home and get some rest.”

We did come back to the States after 3 1/2 years.

My home church had gone through so many changes in the few years we were away.

I hardy recognized the church or anyone in it - everything had changed so much in just a few short years.

I found myself caught in the church politics - one Pastor wanted me on staff, the other one didn’t seem to like me very much.

I had no one to help me process what I had experienced - I couldn’t even talk about it without getting emotional.

We didn’t have member-care. The mission agency assumed that the church was helping us.

Our church was supportive, but they had no clue what we were really going through - even I didn’t know at the time.

All that to say - God never wastes a trial - I went through that so I could help other people who are struggling where I struggled.

Maybe you can relate to some of these experiences?

Glorifying God is not the absence of struggle- God is glorified right in the midst of our struggles.

Philippians 1:27–30 ESV

27 Only let your manner of life be worthy of the gospel of Christ, so that whether I come and see you or am absent, I may hear of you that you are standing firm in one spirit, with one mind striving side by side for the faith of the gospel, 28 and not frightened in anything by your opponents. This is a clear sign to them of their destruction, but of your salvation, and that from God. 29 For it has been granted to you that for the sake of Christ you should not only believe in him but also suffer for his sake, 30 engaged in the same conflict that you saw I had and now hear that I still have.

When you join God in His mission, there is going to be struggle because there is opposition.

Not everyone seems to know this, but suffering is part of what we signed up for.

Suffering doesn’t mean your doing it wrong - it can mean that you are doing it right!

We try to prepare people for what may come - how to avoid unnecessary suffering - but some suffering is unavoidable.

I want to spend our time today touching on a few subjects that could each take up a whole session, but we will just touch on the highlights.

Karie and I have done webinars for Christar on Trauma and Stress. You may have been part of those and if not, you have access to them.

What we are covering today is just a few highlights.

We will be offering a workshop on Conflict Mediation on Thursday for those who would like to know more - Karie has prepared that material but there is just one thing that I want to say about it relating to our theme.

Overcoming Trauma

Jeremiah 29:10–11 ESV

10 “For thus says the Lord: When seventy years are completed for Babylon, I will visit you, and I will fulfill to you my promise and bring you back to this place. 11 For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.

I share this verse when talking about trauma because Jeremiah is writing to exiles in Babylon - he is writing to traumatized people.

This verse was written by the prophet Jeremiah to the children of Israel who had been taken into exile in Babylon in 597 BC.

They were forcibly removed from their homeland while their city was ransacked and burned.

Knowing the reputation of the Babylonians; there were certainly other acts of violence that accompanied this first wave of captivity.

They lost homes and family members; they were taken as slaves for their strength or skill and were forced to work for a foreign king.

In short, they were trying to make the best of a bad situation.

To these prisoners of war, it seemed that their prayers had not been answered.

It seemed that God had abandoned them and that they were all alone to fend for themselves.

Most of the prophets of Israel were saying that this could never happen.

God would not let this happen.

Jeremiah was a lonely voice saying that it would happen, because while there had been a revival among Israel’s leaders during the time of Josiah, the hearts of the people had not changed, and they quickly turned back to their idols.

Jeremiah wrote to people who were traumatized - they were in survival mode, just trying to survive - they lost the ability to transcend their current reality.

What is Trauma?

Trauma is the effect of an event or experience that overwhelms our normal ability to cope.

It is like the circuit breaker on your electrical system which cuts off the power to prevent further damage to the system.

• Trauma happens to workers who are exposed to illness, civil unrest, abuse, violence or even death.

• And you don’t have to experience these things first-hand to be traumatized.

• People who witness these things or even listening to another’s stories and empathizing can produce the same symptoms. This is often called secondary trauma.

• Many of you have worked in places where these things occur frequently – you are surrounded by traumatized people in a traumatized culture!

Some common symptoms of trauma are:

Difficulty with managing moods and recognizing feelings.

Inability to focus or be “present”(dissociation).

Negative sense of identity.

Difficulty with relationships.

Unexplained physical ailments.

Disturbed sense of meaning.

Often in ministering to traumatized people we want to give them a sense of meaning and purpose, but that is not the right place to start.

Transcendence is the ability to rise above our immediate experience and gain a larger perspective - such as ‘glorifying God’.

Transcendence only comes when we have seen enough to see the bigger picture.

We take care of basic needs first - meaning can only be explored when the person begins to feel safe again.

The first step to ministering to traumatized people is establishing safety - and that can take a long time for some people.

You don’t turn the circuit breaker back on until you have found and fixed the problem at the source.

Most people read Jeremiah 29:11 without context and believe that God is promising that he won’t let bad things happen to them.

That’s not what the Bible is saying, and believing that only increases disillusionment when things go terribly wrong.

Understanding Jeremiah 29:11 comes from understanding Jeremiah 29:10.

Realizing that God transcends our circumstances helps us to transcend our circumstances.

Bad things do happen - God is not the cause of those things, but He allows them because He is bigger than tragedy.

God is not glorified by our suffering, but He is glorified through it.

The suffering becomes a contrasting backdrop to the Glory of God.

I will visit you

God wants us to know that He is transcendent over place.

The word “visit” comes from the word “to count” and carries the sense of “being present.”

It is not so much, “I will show up after 70 years”, but “I will still be there after 70 years.”

God is present throughout the exile, but there is an accounting after 70 years.

When we face traumatic circumstances, there is a loss of the sense of God’s presence.

Places are ties to memories which are tied to feelings.

A strange place means no memories and difficulty with knowing what or how to feel.

For the Jews, God’s presence was synonymous with the Temple in Jerusalem.

God is letting them know that He can be found even in Babylon!

As people who have been traumatized by life, we struggle with uncertainty and tend to prefer familiar places.

Refugees

Transcendence teaches us to recognize God in the unfamiliar.

I will fulfill my promise

God wants us to know that He is transcendent over time.

The idea here is that there is an inevitable lapse of time between a statement and its fulfillment.

We live in a world of instant gratification where we get upset if our computers lag enough to notice.

Some of us remember a time where giving someone your word meant that it would be done.

What God has spoken will happen, but there may be a lapse of time.

Trauma distorts our sense of time.

We feel the feelings of the past as if they were our present condition.

Because the past has invaded the present, we lose hope for the future.

We get stuck in the belief that things will never change or improve.

We often miss the promises of God because we do not hold on to His Word.

Time is a test of our ability to receive the promises of God.

If you watch the ball coming to you, you are sure to catch it and hold on to it.

Look away, even for a moment, and it either misses you or hits you in the face.

Stay engaged in the present moment and don’t miss what God is doing!

I will bring you back

God wants us to know that He transcends the will of people and the randomness of circumstances.

The sense of this phrase is circular, “I will bring you back around.”

Eastern thinking (also biblical thought) is that life is circular.

“What goes around comes around.”

It is the nature of life and reality to have experiences which are similar (and yet somehow different) to experiences that we have had in the past.

God allows people to have meaningful choices and that inevitably means that things can go horribly wrong.

What does God do when things go horribly wrong? He tries again.

When people or events become obstacles to God’s plan and purpose He circles back around and takes a new approach.

When an airplane cannot land, it circles until it has permission to land - its called a holding pattern.

In this case, the circle was going to be a 70 year “holding pattern.”

But it was a very productive holding pattern!

They canonized the Old Testament and established synagogues around the study of the Torah.

Jews were elevated to the highest offices in the land (Daniel), won a revolution (Esther) and when Jerusalem was rebuilt is was completely paid for (Nehemiah)!

Because, as traumatizes people, we have difficulty with times and places, we also have difficulty seeing opportunities for growth and change.

When people or circumstances seem vaguely familiar of people or events of the past we are tempted to conclude that the outcome cannot be good. That is the natural function of fear.

God however, is asking us to transcend our natural fear and to put our faith and trust in Him.

Does that mean that bad things won’t happen? Certainly not!

But it does mean that there is an opportunity for a different outcome.

Our confidence is in the nature and character of God whose purposes will eventually prevail!

Managing Stress

We don’t all suffer from trauma, but we all have stress.

Stress is inevitable - part of life.

Not all stress is bad - it can be good too.

We learn to manage stress so that it does not become overwhelming.

God’s Remedy for Stress

1. Consider what God is doing.

James 1:2–4 ESV

2 Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, 3 for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. 4 And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.

2. Take time each day to be alone with God.

Psalm 46:10 ESV

10 “Be still, and know that I am God. I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth!”

3. Guard our hearts.

Proverbs 4:23 ESV

23 Keep your heart with all vigilance, for from it flow the springs of life.

4. Keep a clear conscience before God and man.

Acts 24:16 ESV

16 So I always take pains to have a clear conscience toward both God and man.

5. Number our days and live intentionally.

Psalm 90:12 ESV

12 So teach us to number our days that we may get a heart of wisdom.

6. Remember our limits.

Psalm 103:14 ESV

14 For he knows our frame; he remembers that we are dust.

7. Cultivate a thankful heart.

1 Thessalonians 5:18 ESV

18 give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you.

Navigating Conflict

Late 1990’s, World Evangelical Alliance released a significant study that found “conflict with peers” as the top reason North American missionaries leave the mission field.

Karie ( & sometimes I) have been invited to help mediate some of these conflicts (WEC).

Karie will be doing a separate workshop on how to facilitate a mediation.

For the remainder of this session, I want to focus on our own responsibility in conflict.

Conflict provides and opportunity for self-reflection and trusting God.

Resolving Everyday Conflict (Three Ways You Can Glorify God)

Conflict always provides an opportunity to glorify God. You glorify God—you show how big He is—every time you depend on His grace or all of His undeserved love, mercy, forgiveness, strength, and wisdom.

Conflict is usually defined as the simultaneous existence of mutually exclusive or opposite desires or response tendencies.

In conflict, we must appeal to something or someone outside of ourselves for perspective.

It is precisely in conflict that we need to remind ourselves, or be reminded that it is all about glorifying God!

Galatians 6:1–2 ESV

1 Brothers, if anyone is caught in any transgression, you who are spiritual should restore him in a spirit of gentleness. Keep watch on yourself, lest you too be tempted. 2 Bear one another’s burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ.

Paul’s advice is to watch yourself when trying to correct others.

“Why should I watch myself when they are the problem?”

You see it right? That’s what everyone thinks - its always the other guy!

I have found that often when I approach another person to share my concerns, they have concerns about me too.

Matthew 7:1–5 ESV

1 “Judge not, that you be not judged. 2 For with the judgment you pronounce you will be judged, and with the measure you use it will be measured to you. 3 Why do you see the speck that is in your brother’s eye, but do not notice the log that is in your own eye? 4 Or how can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ when there is the log in your own eye? 5 You hypocrite, first take the log out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to take the speck out of your brother’s eye.

What qualifies you to be a mediator? What qualifies you to act as a judge or an arbiter?

You judge yourself first.

You examine yourself first.

You deal with your own issues first.

If you can’t see you your own issues may be impacting the situation around you, then you haven’t looked hard enough.

I am a facilitator of several different models of prayer ministry.

Everyone who learns to do prayer ministry also receives prayer ministry.

We lead by example, we learn to do what we are supposed to be helping other people to do.

And as I am ministering to other people, I often find that the Lord is speaking to me about me - and I need to be willing to acknowledge that and settle it so I can help them move forward.

What does this have to do with glorifying God through my struggles?

Much in every way!

Our struggles, our trauma, our stress, and our conflict are part of the refining process.

My first assignment as a worker was a failure by my measurement, but it is still giving glory to God.

How is God glorified in that?

Ephesians 1:9–10 ESV

9 making known to us the mystery of his will, according to his purpose, which he set forth in Christ 10 as a plan for the fullness of time, to unite all things in him, things in heaven and things on earth.

I began this session by sharing about my own struggles and my failures.

Through that experience, I learned to walk in greater obedience to God.

I learned that I could not do things my way - it had to be His way.

And even though my agenda failed, He accomplished His agenda - a more yielded and willing servant.

Oh- and some other people saw that and it helped them in their ministry as well.

Struggles and glory don’t go together in our minds - but it certainly works from God’s perspective.

The kingdom of God is a kingdom of paradox, where through the ugly defeat of a cross, a holy God is utterly glorified. Victory comes through defeat; healing through brokenness; finding self through losing self.

- Christian Quotations; Charles Colson

As we are here together for an annual ‘retreat’ it is a time for reflection - a time to allow the suffering we have experienced to be turned into glory.

This is a good time to slow down and become more self-aware, so that we are better able to help others.

It’s a good time to reflect on the past year - or the past several years- to learn from those experience.

You only learn from experience as you take the time to reflect on it.

People don’t automatically learn from experience - but only as they evaluate and reflect on experience.

That is essentially why we are here.

As we reflect on our experiences we can begin to put them in perspective.

We are taking time to see what may be clouding our vision.

We begin to transcend, time, space and circumstances.

We are getting a “God's-eye” view of our lives and ministries.

We are cultivating our hearts by spending time with God, with family and in community.

Questions for reflection:

What kinds of thoughts, emotions or questions did this talk raise?

What would it look like, instead of suppressing that feeling or putting that thought aside, to examine it closer with the help of the Holy Spirit?

Write yourself a brief note now, so you don’t forget it, and commit to spend some time in prayer today asking God what He wants to show you about that thought.

(Snapshot sheet would be good for this)