Living Out God's Design: Understanding the Divine Roles of Men and Women in the Home and Church
Our Blueprint for a New Testament Church • Sermon • Submitted • Presented
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Introduction
Introduction
Terms are often twisted around today to paint targets on people who believe differently than others. Take for instance the term “hate speech.” Hate speech is now defined as any speech that disagrees with a person’s point of view regardless if it is true or not. In fact, many dictionaries are re-writing the term. Here is an example of the accepted definition of “hate speech.”
Hate speech is defined as "abusive or threatening speech or writing that expresses prejudice on the basis of ethnicity, religion, sexual orientation, or similar grounds". The United Nations defines hate speech as "any kind of communication in speech, writing or behavior, that attacks or uses pejorative or discriminatory language with reference to a person or a group on the basis of who they are, in other words, based on their religion, ethnicity, nationality, race, color, descent, gender or other identity factor"
Source: Conversation with Bing, 7/14/2023
(1) . https://bing.com/search?q=define+hate+speech.
(2) What is hate speech? | United Nations - الأمم المتحدة. https://www.un.org/en/hate-speech/understanding-hate-speech/what-is-hate-speech.
(3) Hate speech Definition & Meaning - Merriam-Webster. https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/hate%20speech.
(4) Hate Speech - Definition, Examples, Cases - Legal Dictionary. https://legaldictionary.net/hate-speech/.
(5) Hate speech - Wikipedia. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hate_speech.
By the way, the term “hate speech” is a subjective term and can only be interpreted as such. There is no objective way of defining hate speech because for one person speech might be hateful, but for another it may simply be their point of view. Thus, if someone does not like what God has to say, they can simply defend themselves and their opinion by stating that anything from God is simply “hate speech.”
Another term twisted to target people is the word “misogyny.” Misogyny, as we know, means to hate women. It is a word first used around 1656. However, this word has grown in popularity today. It is now term often used to paint those who teach God’s Word as bigots, male chauvinists, and those who seek to suppress women’s rights. In fact, by the time I am done preaching today, I am pretty sure that both terms will be used against me.
It matters not what terms are used today when it comes to the preaching of God’s Word. God is God. He is the only God. No terms and no person’s opinions will change that fact. My job as your pastor is to preach and teach the whole word of God. Nothing is to be left out. Today’s text and message is a tough one for today. It is a tough message because there is huge push in American society to fundamentally put down any teaching from Scripture. There is no doubt that this is a movement led by Satan himself. And, it is something that God already stated would happen before His return. Note some of these passages from God’s Word.
1 This know also, that in the last days perilous times shall come.
2 For men shall be lovers of their own selves, covetous, boasters, proud, blasphemers, disobedient to parents, unthankful, unholy,
3 Without natural affection, trucebreakers, false accusers, incontinent, fierce, despisers of those that are good,
4 Traitors, heady, highminded, lovers of pleasures more than lovers of God;
5 Having a form of godliness, but denying the power thereof: from such turn away.
6 For of this sort are they which creep into houses, and lead captive silly women laden with sins, led away with divers lusts,
Folks, we are there. We live in a society that is trying its best to convince you that physically and naturally born men are women and vice versa. All of which is driven by their love for themselves, high mindedness, and their love for sinful pleasure than a love for God. Of course, we should expect the world to act in such a way. But what about the church? Unfortunately, Scripture also paints a bleak picture even for those who supposedly are in churches.
1 Now the Spirit speaketh expressly, that in the latter times some shall depart from the faith, giving heed to seducing spirits, and doctrines of devils;
2 Speaking lies in hypocrisy; having their conscience seared with a hot iron;
When it comes to our text this morning, there are many even with churches who have abandoned the true teaching of God’s Word. Too many “so-called” preacher, pastors, and teachers are giving “heed to seducing spirits, and doctrines of devils.” The result is that many are confused about gender and God’s purpose for men and women.
God’s Proclamation Concerning Gender and Their Roles
God’s Proclamation Concerning Gender and Their Roles
34 Let your women keep silence in the churches: for it is not permitted unto them to speak; but they are commanded to be under obedience, as also saith the law.
35 And if they will learn any thing, let them ask their husbands at home: for it is a shame for women to speak in the church.
Validate the point – explain why you have drawn this particular point from a text
Even though these verses address a woman’s role in the corporate worship of a local church it really is about the roles God has ordained for both men and women. There is no doubt that God created only two genders.
27 So God created man in his own image, in the image of God created he him; male and female created he them.
21 And the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall upon Adam, and he slept: and he took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh instead thereof;
22 And the rib, which the Lord God had taken from man, made he a woman, and brought her unto the man.
This is a fact that cannot be denied no matter how much a certain group of mentally disturbed people try to convince you otherwise.
There are only two genders - male and female.
At conception, God assigns gender. Men are born with male parts and women are born with female parts. To teach and believe anything different than that is epitome of insanity. That is the bottom line.
God not only create two genders, but He also ordained purpose for each gender.
Men were created by God to obey God’s directives and lead others to do the same.
Women were created to help men as they obey God’s directives.
Initially, Adam, the first man, and Eve, the first woman lived in complete obedience and submissiveness to God’s purpose and design. All was great until Satan tempted and led both of them into sin. Sin, as we known, ruined so many things. One of the things sinned ruined was man’s relationships. Sin separated men from God. Sin also created major issues in the relationship with men and women. In the New Testament, we find the Holy Spirit identifying the basic problem for men as well as women in relationship to each other. Men have a huge problem with loving God and others. Women, on the other hand, have big issue with submitting to God and others. Note what is written in Ephesians 5.
22 Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord.
25 Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it;
It is interesting to note that both men and women have great difficulty with both when it comes to their relationship with Christ. Each of us, regardless of gender, often struggle with our love for Christ as well as our submission to His commands. Think about it. We are in this discussion today for this very reason. The whole reason the Holy Spirit authored our text this morning was due to that very struggle. The believers in the church at Corinth were not loving Christ as they should and were not submitting to His authority. Even our text today reveals two major problems directly related to their unwillingness to live God’s way.
Explain the point – Probe the meaning of the point and use illustrations to help people understand the point.
Look again at our text and note these two observations.
34 Let your women keep silence in the churches: for it is not permitted unto them to speak; but they are commanded to be under obedience, as also saith the law.
35 And if they will learn any thing, let them ask their husbands at home: for it is a shame for women to speak in the church.
The Holy Spirit specifically states women should be silent in the church. Please remember the context here. The context is corporate worship when the entire church is gathered together in one place to worship God and to learn from God’s Word. We just finished studying last week how God is not the author of confusion, but of peace. He is a God of order. For that reason, God expects all things within the local church to be done decently and in order. In fact, He just laid out very explicit instructions about how to utilize the gift of languages and the gift of prophecy within corporate worship. We covered all that last week. Now, the Holy Spirit adds some additional instructions that concern women within corporate worship. I believe His instructions then to apply to a local church when they are corporately gathered to worship the Lord as we are doing right now. I do not see this applying to teaching situations where we are in small groups of people learning together God’s Word. For instance, on Wednesday nights, we are not gathering together to worship corporately, we gather to have an intensive Bible study. In such a setting, everyone is permitted to ask questions and openly discuss God’s Word as way of learning. However, on Sunday mornings at 11 AM, we have specifically dedicated this hour to singing praises, worshipping the Lord together, taking up offerings unto Him and to hear the preaching of God’s Word. In that setting then, the Holy Spirit limits women for one very important reason. Men are to take ownership of leading their wives and their families in worshipping the Lord. It is an obligation that God has placed upon men since the day He created them. In fact, note in our text something that is often overlooked in these two verses. Look at verse 35.
35 And if they will learn any thing, let them ask their husbands at home: for it is a shame for women to speak in the church.
Who, according to that verse, is responsible for teaching the things of God within the home? It is the husband, the man. He is to teach his wife and his children about God. One of the greatest problems we have in our society today is men have taken a backseat to their primary responsibility. They have cowardly handed the job of teaching their families about God to others. I really think that these verses are more of indictment of men than they are of women. If men as husbands and fathers would grow a spiritual backbone and start doing their job, we would have whole lot less problems in the local church as well as our society. It is proven fact that women desire security more than anything else in their life. Men are to provide that security. When men do what God designed them to do which is spiritually lead their wives and families, the wife feels secure and her trust in her husband grows. However, a man’s biggest problems centers around love. Men are love God and love their wives even as Christ loved the church. If a man has no love for God and is only focused on loving himself, then the rest of his relationship suffer. Men are too often stuck on themselves. Therein lies their problem. We need to get away from doting our ourselves and get back to loving God. When we do, we develop a love for others in the process. At the top of that list of others should always be our wives and our children. Loving God means that I take seriously my responsibility to lead my family and take up the mantle of teaching my wife and my family the things of God. Men have been passing the buck on their responsibility far too long. What has it given us? It has given us an American society that is on the verge of collapse. It is time for men, especially men who claim to follow God, to man up and get back to being true men of God not afraid to lead their wives and their families for Christ.
Let’s not forget though that women also have their issues. That is part of the Holy Spirit’s message in our text. Going back to Ephesians 5, both men and women have their separate problems.
Men have a problem with loving others. Women have problem with submission.
It is the reason why the Holy Spirit encourages wives to “submit” to their husbands. It is the very same reason why the Holy Spirit now brings it up in the context of the corporate worship.
Within the local church, men are to lead, women are to submit to men’s leadership.
Look at verse 34 of our text once again.
34 Let your women keep silence in the churches: for it is not permitted unto them to speak; but they are commanded to be under obedience, as also saith the law.
Here is a parallel verse in 1 Timothy.
11 Let the woman learn in silence with all subjection.
12 But I suffer not a woman to teach, nor to usurp authority over the man, but to be in silence.
13 For Adam was first formed, then Eve.
14 And Adam was not deceived, but the woman being deceived was in the transgression.
Note in our text the phrase “it is not permitted unto them to speak; but…to be under obedience.” The word’s “be under obedience” is the same Greek word as “submit” in Ephesians 5:22
22 Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord.
Again, we must note context. This command follows the instructions concerning the use of languages and prophecy within the church. Consequently, the Holy Spirit is forbidding women to speak in languages or use the gift of prophecy within the local church. Both gifts, as I study God’s Word, were reserved for men called of God to preach the Word of God as they held offices within the church such as pastor and/or deacon. If you study the qualifications for both offices in 1 Timothy and Titus, you will find that these offices are reserved for men. Why men? Remember God designed men to lead. God gave Adam the responsibility of tending, maintaining, and caring for the Garden and the earth.
15 And the Lord God took the man, and put him into the garden of Eden to dress it and to keep it.
16 And the Lord God commanded the man, saying, Of every tree of the garden thou mayest freely eat:
17 But of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, thou shalt not eat of it: for in the day that thou eatest thereof thou shalt surely die.
You will note that not only did he give Adam, the man, responsibility to care for the Garden, but God also entrusted Adam, the man, the duty of obeying God’s instructions. At the moment, there is no woman only man. It is after this, that God then notes...
18 And the Lord God said, It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him.
From there, God creates the first woman from Adam’s rib. Don’t miss something important though in this verse, verse 18. Note that God makes Adam, the man, “an help meet.” God specifically designed men do His will and then He created women so they might assist men in doing God’s will. Even though both Adam and Even royally messed up that mandate, God still expects the same today.
Apply the point – apply the point in ways that are practical to everyday living
Here is the application.
God still expects men to responsibly accomplish His will on earth. He sent His Son, the Lord Jesus Christ, to rescue men from their sin so they might once again fulfill God’s purpose. Once a man accepts Christ as his Savior, God expects that man to daily demonstrate his love for the Lord as well as his love for others through faithful obedience to Christ’s commands. A major part of that command is being the spiritual leader in the home, the church, and the community.
God still expects women to responsibly help men accomplish His will on earth. Again, God sent His son, the Lord Jesus Christ, to rescue women from their sin so they too might once again fulfill God’s purpose in their life. Thus, once a woman accepts Christ as her Savior, God expects that woman to daily demonstrate her love for the Lord as well as her love for others through faithful obedience to Christ’s commands. A major part of that command for women is they be submissive help meets to men assisting them as they spiritually lead in the home, the church, and the community.
The Holy Spirit’s command in our text is based on this principle. Within the local church, men are to step up, be men, and lead their wives, children, and other believers to worship God and learn about God. As they do, women are to submissively allow men to lead and to peacefully, silently learn from the men who seek to do the job God designed them to do.
Now, as we turn back to our text, we want to note one other point.
Failure to Follow God’s Proclamation is Disgraceful
Failure to Follow God’s Proclamation is Disgraceful
35 And if they will learn any thing, let them ask their husbands at home: for it is a shame for women to speak in the church.
Validate the point – explain why you have drawn this particular point from a text
The last part of verse 35 states, “it is a shame for women to speak in the church.” The word “shame” means “disgraceful.” It has the connotation of being offensive to others and injuring a person’s testimony. This word is used 3 times in the New Testament.
6 For if the woman be not covered, let her also be shorn: but if it be a shame for a woman to be shorn or shaven, let her be covered.
12 For it is a shame even to speak of those things which are done of them in secret.
As you can see, in all three instances the meaning is the same. It is a shame or disgraceful for woman to shave her head since her hair is her glory. In Ephesians, the word is used to show how disgraceful it is to speak publically about things done in secret. Thus, it is the same application for our text. When women usurp men’s leadership publically in the corporate worship of the local church, they bring shame to themselves, their church, and to Christ. Essentially, the principle is this. Anytime any person fails to follow God’s proclamations or commands it is disgraceful to the believer and to God.
Explain the point – Probe the meaning of the point and use illustrations to help people understand the point.
Our context here is corporate worship. In this particular instance, a women has failed to be submissive and forgotten her responsibility to help men obey God’s instructions. Her disobedience becomes a public and disgraceful demonstration of sin and disobedience. Now, there is lot more to this than just a woman bringing disgrace or shame to herself and the Lord. I contend that, in this instance, men also have brought shame and disgrace to God as well. Remember that God gave the responsibility of leadership to men. Concerning this scenario, where are the men? In fact, I see the failure of men as contributing to this problem. If men would do their job, women would not be placed in a position of shame.
Let me explain by using man’s original sin as an illustration. Remember that sometime before God created woman God gave to man (man alone) the mandate to “not eat” of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil. It was man’s responsibility to ensure that both he and Eve obeyed that command. Look at the account of original sin and note something interesting.
1 Now the serpent was more subtil than any beast of the field which the Lord God had made. And he said unto the woman, Yea, hath God said, Ye shall not eat of every tree of the garden?
2 And the woman said unto the serpent, We may eat of the fruit of the trees of the garden:
3 But of the fruit of the tree which is in the midst of the garden, God hath said, Ye shall not eat of it, neither shall ye touch it, lest ye die.
4 And the serpent said unto the woman, Ye shall not surely die:
5 For God doth know that in the day ye eat thereof, then your eyes shall be opened, and ye shall be as gods, knowing good and evil.
6 And when the woman saw that the tree was good for food, and that it was pleasant to the eyes, and a tree to be desired to make one wise, she took of the fruit thereof, and did eat, and gave also unto her husband with her; and he did eat.
What is interesting to me is what is missing in this dialogue between Satan and Ever? Rather, I might say who is missing? Where is Adam? Why did not Adam speak up and take leadership in this conversation? Some might say Adam was not around. Was he? Verse 6 says “she (Eve) took of the fruit thereof, and did eat, and gave also unto her husband (Adam) WITH HER; and he did eat.” No where do find that she had to go looking for Adam. In fact, Scripture clearly indicates that her husband was “WITH HER.” I take it that he was with her during the entire conversation with Satan. Yet, not one time did he speak up. Not once did Adam interject. Adam did exactly what so many men do today. They remain silent and let their wives do all the talking. They cowardly sit in the background and do not step to be leaders as God intended. Adam is much more to blame for sin entering the world than Eve simply because God entrusted him to obey God’s instructions to “NOT EAT” of the that particular tree. Adam failed. His failure resulted in shame/disgrace falling upon the entire human race.
12 Wherefore, as by one man sin entered into the world, and death by sin; and so death passed upon all men, for that all have sinned:
Note the Holy Spirit’s words in 1 Timothy 2.
11 Let the woman learn in silence with all subjection.
12 But I suffer not a woman to teach, nor to usurp authority over the man, but to be in silence.
13 For Adam was first formed, then Eve.
14 And Adam was not deceived, but the woman being deceived was in the transgression.
Again, Adam bears a whole heap of responsibility. The Holy Spirit, God, says that “Adam was not deceived.” In other words, he was there and saw through Satan’s deception, but he willingly ignored God’s commands and disobeyed God. Now, God places full responsibility upon men. He demands that men lead their wives, children, and communities spiritually. Any man who does not do his duty will give an account to God. There is no question whatsoever about that.
Apply the point – apply the point in ways that are practical to everyday living
Ladies, think about this way! As believer, you are to help your husbands be the leaders that God intended them to be. It is what God created and designed you to be. Whenever you usurp God’s purpose in your marriage or in the local church by not submitting and by taking leadership positions over men, you are robbing men of their responsibility to lead. Already, we learned that God is not a God of confusion, but a God of peace. Chaos happens in families, churches, and communities when people do not live and act as God created them and purposed them. We see it happening right now in our society. Men are claiming to be women and women claiming to be men. It shameful and extremely disgraceful. Today’s American society is absolute clown show. The entire world is laughing at us. It is no different within churches. In fact, I contend that churches are the root cause of all the mess we have going in today because we stop living God’s way. Listen, ladies, if you decide to live according this word and not do things God’s way, you will do nothing more than bring shame to your family and church. Men, it is the same for you. It is high time that all of us live as God designed us. Men need to man up and be leaders as the lovingly lead in their homes and in our church. Women need to submissively submit to men’s leadership assisting them in becoming the spiritual leaders that our world so desperately needs today.
Conclusion
Conclusion
I know already that I am going to be labeled as misogynist. That is okay. My duty is not please men, but to please God. You can call me whatever you want to call me. It will not change God’s preordained design of two genders and the purpose He assigned to each. Long after this world and its labels are gone, God will still reign. My prayer is that you will take this message in the same spirit that Paul desired when the Holy Spirit used him to pen this wonderful letter to the church of Corinth.
21 The salutation of me Paul with mine own hand.
22 If any man love not the Lord Jesus Christ, let him be Anathema Maran-atha.
23 The grace of our Lord Jesus Christ be with you.
24 My love be with you all in Christ Jesus. Amen.
What was the spirit of Paul? If you don’t love the Lord Jesus Christ, then you are in His hands and will face His coming judgment. However, with great love for all of you, his desire and mine is that you humbly accept God’s message and demonstrate your love for the Lord through obedience. Men, be men. Lead your wives and families God’s way. Women, be submissive and assist your husbands be the leaders God demands of them.