James Chapter Three:

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Proverbs 18:20–21 NASB95
With the fruit of a man’s mouth his stomach will be satisfied; He will be satisfied with the product of his lips. Death and life are in the power of the tongue, And those who love it will eat its fruit.
In today’s passage, James deals with something that if we are honest with, we all struggle with it in some way. Today we will talk about our words. Using words to build people up rather than tear them down. We collectively as a youth group have a problem with our words. We can be a very sarcastic group, we can be harsh in the way we talk to and about each other, but today I want to challenge us about the way we think about our words.
James 3:1–4 NASB95
Let not many of you become teachers, my brethren, knowing that as such we will incur a stricter judgment. For we all stumble in many ways. If anyone does not stumble in what he says, he is a perfect man, able to bridle the whole body as well. Now if we put the bits into the horses’ mouths so that they will obey us, we direct their entire body as well. Look at the ships also, though they are so great and are driven by strong winds, are still directed by a very small rudder wherever the inclination of the pilot desires.
Our tongue is a small thing but it can easily be the thing that controls us. James warns the church he is writing to that not all people should be teachers because of this. Something I try really hard to do is be mindful about the things I say and the way I talk. I want to represent the Gospel in everything I do. I may not do the best job at it. But I try really hard to honor God and build others up with my words. Imagine a pastor who says terrible things about his congregation. He is mean and inappropriate. He isn’t mindful of his words but then he gets behind the pulpit and tries to encourage and love his congregation through the preaching and teaching of God’s Words. There is a conflict and hypocrisy there right? How can he expect to share God’s Word effectively when he has just used his own words to tear his people down. In the same way, think about a missionary or someone who is trying to share the Gospel with their lost friend. If they are cussing and spreading rumors and gossiping why would the person he is witnessing trust the Gospel he is trying to share.
Horses controlled by a small bit
Boats controlled by small rudders
In the ancient world there were few things as important to society and transportation than horses and bits. Both are powerful forms of transportation. Horses are powerful animals and much stronger and faster than humans. The fact that people ride horses at all is amazing to me. Same with boats. Logs are heavy, yet people can craft them in a way that they are buoyant. More than that they can stand against the craziness of the ocean’s strong and violent waves. James points out that the source of direction behind these powerful instruments is found in the smallest place. A small bit in the mouth directs a horse where you want it to go. A small rudder can direct a large ship.
The same is true of our tongue. It’s not a large part of our body, but it can get us into a lot of trouble.
How many of you guys ever gotten yourself in trouble because of something you said?
How many of you have hurt someone, whether on purpose or on accident, because of something you said?
How many of you have ever spread rumors or gossiped about people?
How many of you have ever lied?
How many of you guys have ever said something inappropriate, a cuss word or an inappropriate joke?
It is crazy that something so small could cause us so many problems!
James 3:5–8 NASB95
So also the tongue is a small part of the body, and yet it boasts of great things. See how great a forest is set aflame by such a small fire! And the tongue is a fire, the very world of iniquity; the tongue is set among our members as that which defiles the entire body, and sets on fire the course of our life, and is set on fire by hell. For every species of beasts and birds, of reptiles and creatures of the sea, is tamed and has been tamed by the human race. But no one can tame the tongue; it is a restless evil and full of deadly poison.
If we aren’t careful we can set our whole lives on fire. James holds our words accountable. Word’s aren’t an empty thing to be thrown here and there. They are powerful tools that can defile the entire body and set our life on fire. We as the human race have found a way to tame almost every creature and yet we let our tongues run wild. Our tongues are relentlessly evil. What kind of trouble does our tongue get us into?
Coarse Talk and Crude Jokes
Ephesians 5:1–5 NASB95
Therefore be imitators of God, as beloved children; and walk in love, just as Christ also loved you and gave Himself up for us, an offering and a sacrifice to God as a fragrant aroma. But immorality or any impurity or greed must not even be named among you, as is proper among saints; and there must be no filthiness and silly talk, or coarse jesting, which are not fitting, but rather giving of thanks. For this you know with certainty, that no immoral or impure person or covetous man, who is an idolater, has an inheritance in the kingdom of Christ and God.
Be imitators of Christ
What would it look like if we imitated Christ with the words we say?
Words said in love
Not false flattery but also not harsh and bitter words
Words said in sacrifice to others
Jesus used His words to teach others. In fact God’s Word is still teaching!
Words offered to God as a fragrant aroma
Jesus didn’t use His word’s to glorify Himself, He used them to glorify the Father
Words said in thanksgiving
Word’s consistent with the calling on our lives
Biting Comments
Galatians 5:13–26 NASB95
For you were called to freedom, brethren; only do not turn your freedom into an opportunity for the flesh, but through love serve one another. For the whole Law is fulfilled in one word, in the statement, “You shall love your neighbor as yourself.” But if you bite and devour one another, take care that you are not consumed by one another. But I say, walk by the Spirit, and you will not carry out the desire of the flesh. For the flesh sets its desire against the Spirit, and the Spirit against the flesh; for these are in opposition to one another, so that you may not do the things that you please. But if you are led by the Spirit, you are not under the Law. Now the deeds of the flesh are evident, which are: immorality, impurity, sensuality, idolatry, sorcery, enmities, strife, jealousy, outbursts of anger, disputes, dissensions, factions, envying, drunkenness, carousing, and things like these, of which I forewarn you, just as I have forewarned you, that those who practice such things will not inherit the kingdom of God. But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law. Now those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires. If we live by the Spirit, let us also walk by the Spirit. Let us not become boastful, challenging one another, envying one another.
Paul warns us not to use our words to bite and devour each other but instead to build each other up in the Spirit. Our words can either carry out the desires of our flesh or the desires of the Spirit. And Paul tells us that if we are called by God we are called to live and walk by the Spirit. Our flesh is crucified with Christ and we are born again by the Spirit.
Do our words reflect the fruit of the spirit?
Words of Love
Words of Joy
Words of Peace
Words of Patience
Words of Kindness
Words of Goodness
Words of Faithfulness
Words of Gentleness
Words of Self Control
Hateful Speech
Ephesians 4:29–32 NASB95
Let no unwholesome word proceed from your mouth, but only such a word as is good for edification according to the need of the moment, so that it will give grace to those who hear. Do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, by whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice. Be kind to one another, tender-hearted, forgiving each other, just as God in Christ also has forgiven you.
Edification: “The building up and strengthening in the faith of believers and churches. Believers are strengthened by God and are urged, too, to build up one another. The church is edified through God’s word, through the Holy Spirit and the proper use of spiritual gifts, through the church’s appointed ministries and through the mutual love, support and encouragement of its members.”
The Greek word for edification is Oikodomē (Oy-kod-om-ay) which is a noun not a verb that means building. In a beautiful way Paul is bringing this imagery to mind of what the purpose of the church is. Peter tells us in 1 Peter 2 that we are living stones being built into the house of God. Christ is the cornerstone, and we have been rejected by mankind just like Christ was but together we are being built into a spiritual house for a holy priesthood to offer up spiritual sacrifice to God made acceptable through Jesus. Our sacrifice to God as individuals and as a church is to give our hearts and lives to Christ to do whatever He wills with us. We are a living sacrifice and that includes our tongues as well. We are brought together not by hate but by the love of Christ who demonstrates that love for us by dying on the cross and His love’s authority on our lives is validated by His resurrection. This is the defining characteristic of Jesus’ disciples, that we would be known by the love we show to others not by hateful words. So we build each other up. One house united under Christ our Lord, our cornerstone.
Gossip
Proverbs 10:18 NASB95
He who conceals hatred has lying lips, And he who spreads slander is a fool.
Leviticus 19:16 NASB95
‘You shall not go about as a slanderer among your people, and you are not to act against the life of your neighbor; I am the Lord.
Proverbs 11:9 NASB95
With his mouth the godless man destroys his neighbor, But through knowledge the righteous will be delivered.
Proverbs 11:13 NASB95
He who goes about as a talebearer reveals secrets, But he who is trustworthy conceals a matter.
Can you believe she did that? Can you believe what they were doing? Gossip can be a dangerous thing. As Christians we need to be people of truth not rumors.
How many of you have gotten hurt by someone gossiping about you?
Gossip usually comes from a place of incomplete understanding. Its people stating partial information or even false information as if they know the whole story. Unfortunately, once you put it out there you can never get it back and you have no control of what people do with that information after its out there. The reason? Maybe rumors are started to put others down, maybe its nosy people trying to meddle and put their nose where it doesn’t belong, maybe it comes from a place of insecurity and wanting people to give you attention. Whatever the reason we need to be careful not to allow gossip to become a blind spot for us.
The Quick-Reference Guide to Counseling Women 2 Definitions and Key Thoughts

Gossip exploits the personal issues or matters of another person. Someone who gossips “habitually reveals personal or sensational facts about others.” Such conversations typically involve “rumors, opinions, or inside information.… [Gossip] is not an innocent pastime. It is sin.”

• Slander is a direct partner of gossip. Slander includes malicious and hurtful talk about another person. It is “the utterance of false charges or misrepresentations which defame or damage another’s reputation.”

What is a healthy way of responding to gossip?
So what did Jesus think about the words we use?
Matthew 12:33–37 NASB95
“Either make the tree good and its fruit good, or make the tree bad and its fruit bad; for the tree is known by its fruit. “You brood of vipers, how can you, being evil, speak what is good? For the mouth speaks out of that which fills the heart. “The good man brings out of his good treasure what is good; and the evil man brings out of his evil treasure what is evil. “But I tell you that every careless word that people speak, they shall give an accounting for it in the day of judgment. “For by your words you will be justified, and by your words you will be condemned.”
What do our words say about the condition of our heart?
There is a saying, “hurt people hurt people”. I think that if we think about the words we use a lot of it comes from the hurt we feel. We lash out at people who have hurt our feelings or we feel have wronged us, we put people down out of insecurity, we spread rumors about people to make us feel in control.
What’s the solution? If the tongue cannot be tamed what chance do we have?
Produce fruit consistent with our calling
James 3:8–12 NASB95
But no one can tame the tongue; it is a restless evil and full of deadly poison. With it we bless our Lord and Father, and with it we curse men, who have been made in the likeness of God; from the same mouth come both blessing and cursing. My brethren, these things ought not to be this way. Does a fountain send out from the same opening both fresh and bitter water? Can a fig tree, my brethren, produce olives, or a vine produce figs? Nor can salt water produce fresh.
We need to take a step back and consider how we use our words. Many times we use our words to sing and praise God or pray and then turn around and hurt someone who is made in God’s image. We don’t worship people but James challenges us to see people how God sees them. All people are made in the image of God. That should mean something to us. Blessing God and cursing people made in His image is backwards and inconsistent with who He has called us to be. Should bitter, unclean, and hateful words come from people who have been born again, made clean, and changed by grace and love?
Grow in wisdom
James 3:13–18 NASB95
Who among you is wise and understanding? Let him show by his good behavior his deeds in the gentleness of wisdom. But if you have bitter jealousy and selfish ambition in your heart, do not be arrogant and so lie against the truth. This wisdom is not that which comes down from above, but is earthly, natural, demonic. For where jealousy and selfish ambition exist, there is disorder and every evil thing. But the wisdom from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, reasonable, full of mercy and good fruits, unwavering, without hypocrisy. And the seed whose fruit is righteousness is sown in peace by those who make peace.
We need wisdom from above. We need to live there. Not in bitterness and selfish ambition but in wisdom. pure and peaceable wisdom that is gentle and reasonable. People full of mercy when people hurt us and producing good fruits. The fruit of righteousness is sown in peace by those who make peace.
Do your words reflect that?
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