Husbands and Wives

Jacob Brimm

Ephesians • Sermon • Submitted 2 years ago • Presented 2 years ago

Ephesians 5:22–33

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Ephesians 5:22–33 CSB

Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord, because the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church. He is the Savior of the body. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives are to submit to their husbands in everything. Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself for her to make her holy, cleansing her with the washing of water by the word. He did this to present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or anything like that, but holy and blameless. In the same way, husbands are to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. For no one ever hates his own flesh but provides and cares for it, just as Christ does for the church, since we are members of his body. For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two will become one flesh. This mystery is profound, but I am talking about Christ and the church. To sum up, each one of you is to love his wife as himself, and the wife is to respect her husband.

In Summary!

Ephesians 5:32 CSB

This mystery is profound, but I am talking about Christ and the church.

Let’s start today by acknowledgeing the Summary that Paul gives at the end of this section. Yes, Paul is writing about Husbands and wives, but he is clearly telling us that marriage is about reflecting something greater.

Provides us with the purpose of marriage:

Genesis 1:28 CSB

God blessed them, and God said to them, “Be fruitful, multiply, fill the earth, and subdue it. Rule the fish of the sea, the birds of the sky, and every creature that crawls on the earth.”

So we learn that the purpose of marriage is not joy, or happiness, or any of those things; but rather to “be fruitful and multiply” and to have dominion over - to rule - the earth as good stewards of the gift we have been given.

Now does that mean that we should not have joy, happiness, and those great aspects of life within a marriage? We should absolutley have those things! THe Marriage is to model Christ’s love for the church!

Wives Submit to your Husband

Ephesians 5:22 CSB

Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord,

Not a popular Scripture!

The Word of GOd says that wives are to submit - to voluntarily place themselves under the legitimate authority of their husbands.

What does this Scripture NOT say:

There is no difference in Value

This Scripture is NOT talking about any difference in VALUE or PERSONHOOD.

God the Son is equal to God the Father, is Equal to God the Holy Spirit. But God the Son submits to GOd the Father in function.

1 corinthians 11:3 “But I want you to know that Christ is the head of every man, and the man is the head of the woman, and God is the head of Christ.”

Husband and wife are equal - both created in the image of GOD

Gen 1:27 “So God created man in his own image; he created him in the image of God; he created them male and female.”

There is NO difference in VALUE or PERSONHOOD.

The Submission is NOT absolute!

Notice the submission is to the husband “as to the Lord”.

This means there is limitations as to breadth of the required submission.

Another way to put this is that the Husbands authority is limited. If what the husbands commands is outside the will of GOD or goes counter to the Word of God, then the Christian wife cannot submit. In that case the husband has overstepped his bounds.

This can be difficult in the marriage. If the husband is a non-believer it can be very difficult sometimes. It can be even more difficult within the marriage between a Christian husband and wife.

Tony Evans: What if the wife is the better leader in the home or has greater intelligence or more ability than her husband? Think of it this way: A merging tractor trailer may be bigger and carry more cargo than a tiny car coming down the road; but tractor trailer does not have the right of way and must yield as instructed to avoid catastrophe. God as Created has placed a husband on the highway and given his wafe the yield sign within the will of God.

Sometimes it is difficult, but there is an order and we must adhear to it!

Ephesians 5:22–24 CSB

Because the husband is the head of the wife, as Christ is the head of the church. Christ would never ask the church to sin, to do anything that goes against the Word and will of God; so a husband should never ask his wife to do either of those things. Husbands, we have to model Christ’s love for the church in how we love our wives.

Notice the words: HE IS THE SAVIOR OF THE BODY. THis get’s built upon shortly when Paul talks about Christ’s sacrifice for the church.

SO what is the Word of GOd doing right here with these words? It is a Therefore moment! This is one of those reminders about ALL THAT CHRIST DID - and all that we are to do in our submission to Him.

And then we are reminded that we are to submit to Christ because HE is the Savior.

Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives are to submit to their husbands in everything.

Usually when God is repeating Himself it is best to obey. So wives, you get a 2 fold reminder.

Maybe GOD knows that it is a command women do not like, so He spaced it out some.

Husbands commands

But Husbands, don’t think you are getting off easy.

Ephesians 5:25–26 CSB

Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself for her to make her holy, cleansing her with the washing of water by the word.

It says Husbands love your wives. Don’t miss read this into thinking you need more than 1 wife! That sounds like a nightmare!

It is pluarl on both ends: SO HUSBAND, LOVE YOUR WIFE!

How should I love my wife -

As Christ loved the Church

As Christ gave himself for her

Desiring the BEST for her

To make her holy!

Cleansing her with the washing of the Word

Husbands if you didn’t pick this up: you have more responsibilities! There is more placed upon you! You have greater authority because you are representing Christ to your wife! You are leading your marriage as an earlthy reflection of Christ’s lvoe for the church!

Jesus didn’t skimp out on His duty and You better not be skimping on yours! AMEM

Ephesians 5:27–28 CSB

He did this to present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or anything like that, but holy and blameless. In the same way, husbands are to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself.

Christ did all that for his bride the church - that’s you and me - He loves us, He gave Himself up for us, He desires the best for us - he wants us holy - he cleanses us with the Word; He even sent us a healper so we are never alone!

WHY?

To present the church to Himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle, but holy and blameless.

Husbands - your loving and serving your wife - it is a gift for you.

I promise you this: If you will be a Godly husband to your wife, seek her, chase her, love her, cherish her, wash her, desire the best for her - lead her as Christ leads the church

There is ZERO downside!

Your passion for her will grow - and likewise hers for you.

Your desire for her will grow - and likewise hers for you.

Your joy in her will grow - and likewise hers in you.

Your intimacy will grow - that’s a 2 way street.

It is the deepest possible connection! True spritual intimacy!

And anything less - should be detestable to you!

Ephesians 5:28 CSB

In the same way, husbands are to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself.

I’m going to read that again!

Ephesians 5:29–30 CSB

For no one ever hates his own flesh but provides and cares for it, just as Christ does for the church, since we are members of his body.

Ephesians 5:31 CSB

For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.

Does this sound familiar to anyone?

Genesis 2:24 CSB

This is why a man leaves his father and mother and bonds with his wife, and they become one flesh.

You know, a lot of men have this idea that as the “man of the house” they have to be a dictator - that its my way or the high way. And of course, worldly there is the idea that the man has to make the most money, work all the time to be a provider - oh the mandate to be a provider.

The Word of God says that a man and woman are joined together and become 1 flesh. We tend to overlook this in reality - 1 flesh means no longer 2, but 1.

So husband, yes you are to be a provier - but it is far more than financial provision. It is leadership, companionship, modeling love and respect. Raising your children alongside your wife - that’s where the woman came from: man’s side. A husband is to be sacrificial. Sometimes that means doing without, so that the wife doesn’t have to.

Let me ask you a question: How much does Christ love the church? To death.

Valentine’s day has it wrong: Love is not a heart, it’s a cross!

Listen: your wife should be your partner. You should be working together. Each one of us working to help our spouse be the absolute best that they can be in Christ. Husbands you should be going the extra mile!

Let’s go back again to what Paul quotes.

A man leaves his father and mother. The man moves first! The man serves first. The man models first. The man initiates! THe man owns responsibility. The man Treats his wife as he should: as a precious image of God - someone special! A husband sacrifices for his wife.

And when she sees all this: watch out!

Because there is nothing stronger than a husband who has the support of a loved and powerful woman behind him! And there is nothing stronger than a wife with the sacrifical love of a husband empowering her.

And there is nothing stronger than a marriage built upon the ROCK and empower by the Holy Spirit and REFLECTING the love of Christ in the world!