Desire
Notes
Transcript
Handout
This morning we are going to take up the subject of desire, and specifically as it relates to sexuality.
Last week we discussed sexual identity and it’s role within culture and what the Bible has to say about it.
The two halves of the discussion on sexuality are on identity and desire. How do we see ourselves and what do we desire?
If we are going to talk about sexual identity then we really have to talk about sexual desire.
Our idea for this morning is
When we trust that Christ is who He says He is then we know that we are loved well beyond our desire
When we trust that Christ is who He says He is then we know that we are loved well beyond our desire
Let’s begin by talking about desire:
Let’s begin by talking about desire:
Desire is the common denominator in Humanity. We all share in it.
Desire is the common denominator in Humanity. We all share in it.
Desire without knowledge is not good,
and whoever makes haste with his feet misses his way.
Desire is something that we all share in. And we better have desires because if we didn’t we wouldn’t do much
We eat when we desire
We desire meaning and work and purpose
We desire relationships.
we are a complex makeup up desires.
To desire is normal and necessary but the problem is that desire is ambivalent. It is neither good nor bad. It depends on something else to push it forward.
We have said like the writer of proverbs, we make haste with our feet.
Water is necessary unless it makes haste
There are plenty of things in our lives that are great, unless we have too much of them. Then they overtake us.
Fire is not bad unless it makes haste
“The infamous Carr Fire burnt 229,651 acres, killed eight people and unleashed an EF-3 equivalent firenado before it was fully contained in 2020. The cause was very different from all of other cases on the list because it was purely an accident. Flat tires are usually minor inconveniences of driving experiences, and they do not normally have an enormous impact. This one was an exception as stated by Sacramento, California news outlet Fox40. The poor couple had a flat tire at the worst possible location and time. When the tire on the trailer got flat, the rim scraped the asphalt causing the sparks to fly out and become what was known as the Carr Fire
Desire needs fuel. It needs to burn something.
The problem with desire is that it has no meaning in itself. it only works when it’s connected to the object of it’s desire.
You never just desire
You desire…something.
I desire..is always connected to an object.
I desire a donut
and because its not substantial enough
So we chase until we hope to find something substantial enough
The Christian sees God as the ultimate object. He is the center, the sustainer and creator. He is father and brother. He has seen and rescued us.
We are going to walk through parts of Romans 1 to see some of the causes and results of desire. We will see it play itself out in sexuality and in harmful behavior.
We see how desire begins to play out in Romans 1.
For what can be known about God is plain to them, because God has shown it to them. For his invisible attributes, namely, his eternal power and divine nature, have been clearly perceived, ever since the creation of the world, in the things that have been made. So they are without excuse.
We see that God has revealed and shown who He is.
But now we will see what it looks like when we ignore God. The Scripture states that when people have refused to see God for who He is, He gives them up to their desire. They become pursuers of their desire.
And without God your desires become your god. And desires make terrible gods.
For although they knew God, they did not honor him as God or give thanks to him, but they became futile in their thinking, and their foolish hearts were darkened. Claiming to be wise, they became fools, and exchanged the glory of the immortal God for images resembling mortal man and birds and animals and creeping things.
Therefore God gave them up in the lusts of their hearts to impurity, to the dishonoring of their bodies among themselves, because they exchanged the truth about God for a lie and worshiped and served the creature rather than the Creator, who is blessed forever! Amen.
God gave them up to pursue images, which are idols, to worship lesser things.
God gave them up to the lust of their hearts.
And to the dishonoring of the body
For this reason God gave them up to dishonorable passions. For their women exchanged natural relations for those that are contrary to nature; and the men likewise gave up natural relations with women and were consumed with passion for one another, men committing shameless acts with men and receiving in themselves the due penalty for their error.
This pertains to sexual desire and attempting to meet that desire in lesser ways. IF you are feeling uncomfortable and wondering if this entire message will be on same sex attraction, don’t worry it wont.
Its in these moments that we talk about the people out there.
Where we isolate and say at least i’m not that doing that.
And same sex attraction gets the highest honors for some reason for being the target from the church
Why is being gay the most important sin we talk about in the church?
Why not porn?
Why not divorce?
Why not sex outside of marriage?
When we are talking about living beyond our desires it cannot just be “them” whoever “them” is. It is living in our own purity.
If we are going to, in their trust of Jesus, live past their desire, no matter the desire,
Then we need to as a church, back it up.
And since they did not see fit to acknowledge God, God gave them up to a debased mind to do what ought not to be done. They were filled with all manner of unrighteousness, evil, covetousness, malice. They are full of envy, murder, strife, deceit, maliciousness. They are gossips, slanderers, haters of God, insolent, haughty, boastful, inventors of evil, disobedient to parents, foolish, faithless, heartless, ruthless.
And God gave them up to their own desires. envy, murder, strife. Gossip. Slanderers and so on.
When God gives us up to meet our own desires. The desires we want to meet are only those that work for us. That meet our needs. That have no lasting benefit for another.
When we are given over to our desires we will create ways to worship those desires.
The problem with desire is that it is not shared around a common good but is rather around a personal need being met
The problem with desire is that it is not shared around a common good but is rather around a personal need being met
CS Lewis uses the word Eros to talk about this kind of desire.
He says it takes the voice of a God in its confidence and commitment to its goal. But it doesn't point to anywhere beyond satisfying that goal. And we know it's not the voice of a God because it's desires meeting place it's destination is not goodness but can be good or can be bad
Listen to this quote
“It is in the grandeur of Eros that the seeds of danger are concealed. He has spoken like a god. His total commitment, his reckless disregard of happiness, his transcendence of self-regard, sound like a message from the eternal world.”
The probem with desire, or eros, is that it can only ever love itself. It is never aimed at the good of another person.
And when we pair desire with sexuality we can, like a spark off a tire rim, create all sorts of problems.
We see this all the time in what the Bible calls pornea
Sexual immorality, or pornea
utilizing sexuality to meet our own desire in our own way.
utilizing sexuality to meet our own desire in our own way.
that which meets a short term need regardless of long term consequences
Desire is never enough to fulfill human relationships.
A need being met is not about a relationship, it is only about a personal goal. Human desire can only be met in the self. It is not met in relationship.
We have treated desire as the highest virtue of humanity but desire is rather unwieldy.
So what do we do with desire? What do we act on?
So what do we do with desire? What do we act on?
Culturally We don’t disagree with desire, we disagree with the object of desire. We don’t disagree with the problem, we disagree with the solution. The issue isn’t then desire, it’s what we do with it.
Culturally We don’t disagree with desire, we disagree with the object of desire. We don’t disagree with the problem, we disagree with the solution. The issue isn’t then desire, it’s what we do with it.
We have let desire take the reigns but we are called to lead with love.
- The call of the church is to reflect the heart of God in the world through the activity of the saints. We are called to remind people that
Desire can work with better things toward purpose beyond itself.
Desire can work with better things toward purpose beyond itself.
The Created order has purpose within it
And desires can work toward something greater than itself. But the problem is that, left to themselves, they will devour everything.
Not every desire is intended to be met, nor should it be
Not every desire is intended to be met, nor should it be
Desire as a means to relationship doesn’t work. Take the 10th commandment as an example:
“You shall not covet your neighbor’s house; you shall not covet your neighbor’s wife, or his male servant, or his female servant, or his ox, or his donkey, or anything that is your neighbor’s.”
What would happen if there was no prohibition on the desire of your neighbors goods? War all the time. There would be no end to aggression and action.
If we lived at the mercy of our desires, there would be no relationship and no stopping aggression and action.
And so we are left with this remainder of desires. Often around sexuality.
We live within unacted desires all the time. And will continue to.
The call of the Christian is to realize there are much more important things than figuring out ways to express desire.
We recognize that desire does not ultimately get you want you need.
Because it doesn’t build relationships and doesn’t move beyond the self.
Desires, as strong as they are, cannot be the highest calling of humanity. And definitely not the highest calling of the Christian.
Because desire has no purpose, has nothing higher in itself.
What God offers is that there is something better than yourself in the world. That there is purpose and meaning.
This is where we talk about sexuality
This is where we talk about sexuality
sexuality is part of the created order and has purpose. That’s why Christians believe that sexuality and desire is part of the created order because there is purpose built into it.
Sexuality is procreative
It, by it’s definition, gives more than itself.
And while marriage is the only place where sexuality is to be fulfilled, what we have to remember is that fulfilling sexual desire is not the highest point of human ordering or calling.
Meaning that we are not looking and saying that to be really holy or fulfilled or spiritual you have to look like this.
This is the same mistake we are making about desire. Desire is not the highest point of calling.
Giving glory to God is.
And we do that in the integrity in our lives and love for God and in our relationships.
Whether you are married
or not
or single
or dating
or too young to do any of that.
We can live fulfilled lives in God
Desire sees itself, we see desire itself as godlike. We see expressing desire as almost divine. It wants to be eternal but cannot, the only way to speak to desire the only way to meet it at its own level, is to actually introduce it to that which is divine.
Desire sees itself, we see desire itself as godlike. We see expressing desire as almost divine. It wants to be eternal but cannot, the only way to speak to desire the only way to meet it at its own level, is to actually introduce it to that which is divine.
Desire needs to come into the contact with Divinity, in order for it to truly be useful.
When we come into contact with God through Jesus we see we are much more than what we desire
When we come into contact with God through Jesus we see we are much more than what we desire
Your desire doesn’t define who you are. Jesus does. Your obedience is not to desires or identity. It belongs to Jesus. your god is not your desires.
This is why not all desires have to be met.
because you are more than that and can easily sell yourself short in just collapsing into desire.
This goes for anything that would cause us to place ourselves at the mercy of our desire before understanding the mercy of God.
Because desire isn’t merciful. It will only take
Because desire isn’t merciful. It will only take
God is entirely merciful. He has already given.
God is entirely merciful. He has already given.
But when thinking about what we desire and what we fall to or want to fall to.
Your temptation and desire is different than action
To be tempted, to desire something that is less than what God wants is not the sin. The sin is “being given over” and acting in it.
We have been given Christ, who is greater and more than any desire can take us.
Let’s close by looking at Colossians 3
If then you have been raised with Christ, seek the things that are above, where Christ is, seated at the right hand of God. Set your minds on things that are above, not on things that are on earth. For you have died, and your life is hidden with Christ in God. When Christ who is your life appears, then you also will appear with him in glory.
Put to death therefore what is earthly in you: sexual immorality, impurity, passion, evil desire, and covetousness, which is idolatry. On account of these the wrath of God is coming. In these you too once walked, when you were living in them. But now you must put them all away: anger, wrath, malice, slander, and obscene talk from your mouth. Do not lie to one another, seeing that you have put off the old self with its practices and have put on the new self, which is being renewed in knowledge after the image of its creator. Here there is not Greek and Jew, circumcised and uncircumcised, barbarian, Scythian, slave, free; but Christ is all, and in all.
This is the calling of the church.
Christ is all, and in all.
We are not bundles of desires
Nor are we finger pointers of people who believe that they are.
Christ is all and in all.
Christ is in the new self, being renewed in knowledge after the image of it’s creator.
We are in the new self, being renewed in knowledge after the image of it’s creator.
We call people to find the incredible relationship in Christ and find that relationship within the body of believers.
If we are going to call people to obedience in Christ in their desire and in sexual integrity, within a Christian orthodox belief, then the church is called to receive and love them and actually become a family. So if we believe this then it means we work to be a spiritual family to those living in obedience to Christ submitting to Him and not living in their desires.
Our doors need to swing wider open to receive people struggling in desire.
Our lives need to swing wider open to receive people struggling in desire.
To show them the Love of Christ that is found to be more than, all in all, than we could have ever even hoped to desire.
What you have been hoping for is found in Christ.
Agape love is the act of self giving love. It is the source of all loves. It is the love found in eros before it becomes perversion. It is the love found in philos, the love found in friendship.
