Focus on Relationships

Last week we started a new sermon series called “Focus.” We are letting the Gospel of Matthew show us various ways that we should focus on God and our relationship with him and with those around us. This week we will “Focus on Relationships.” Our scripture comes from Matthew 18:15-20. The words will be on the screen.

15 “If your brother sins against you, go and tell him his fault, between you and him alone. If he listens to you, you have gained your brother. 16 But if he does not listen, take one or two others along with you, that every charge may be established by the evidence of two or three witnesses. 17 If he refuses to listen to them, tell it to the church. And if he refuses to listen even to the church, let him be to you as a Gentile and a tax collector. 18 Truly, I say to you, whatever you bind on earth shall be bound in heaven, and whatever you loose on earth shall be loosed in heaven. 19 Again I say to you, if two of you agree on earth about anything they ask, it will be done for them by my Father in heaven. 20 For where two or three are gathered in my name, there am I among them.”

Please pray with me…

This can be one of the toughest scriptures to focus on. Many Christians have heard views on this scripture and many of them not positive. This is one of the most abused scriptures by both pastors and churches.

If weare not careful this scripture can lead us to believe that some people belong as a part of the church, and some do not. Some people are good enough and others will never become good enough to be in the house of God.

Context matters, and although it is true that we need to do what we can do to remedy division within the church this text is also focused on how we are to treat those around us. Especially those that are children and new to the faith.

Matthewchapter 18 up to this point has had a focus on children and how we should come to God like children. How we should make sure we don’t do anything to turn children away from God. How we should seek out the lost and save them.

Our texttoday, if we view it as a continuation of this chapter, may be focusing on someone who is hurting the faith of those around them. They are having a negative impact on the new believers. The new children of the faith.

(College story about former prison inmate)

Our focus should not be on how we believe that people should act. Or on our own opinions on how someone should act or interact with us. Our focus should be on how our words and actions are impacting those around us. Are people desiring to be in a relationship with us or are they attempting to stay away because of how we treat those around us?

God hasgiven us the power and the presence to be able to help those being hurt by fellow Christians. He has given us the ability to help them see God in a different light. We are to be the light of the world.

We areto be a beacon that leads people towards God instead of away from God. This scripture may be telling us that we may need to let some people out of our lives if they are leading those around us away from God.

This still isn’t a fun lesson. These are not fun words to here, but Jesus is saying that those that are most vulnerable in the faith need to be protected by the church. We have to as we say at Kirkersville help them become formed and developed into who God wants them to be.

How dowe do this? We help those around us either learn about God, become a believer in God, or become closer to God through relationships. Each ofus most likely interact with or have some type of relationship with three different people groups.

The first are those that belong to our church. They arethose that we are most closely connected with on or faith journey. The onesthat we can rely on to hopefully be there for us when we need them.

We might interact with other Christians. They don’t go to our church, but they follow God through Jesus. They attend a church or at a minimum believe that Jesus is their Lord and Savior.

The lastgroup are those that would not considerer themselves to be Christian. They may have not heard about God, or they don’t believe they have a reason to want to be in a relationship with God through Jesus.

We arebeing watched with how we interact with each of these groups. There arethose that may be defining what it means to be in a relationship with Jesus based off of the way they see us interact with them and those around them.

We needto act in such a way that when we build a relationship with them, they will trust us and be willing to listen to what we have to say. We need to have our words and our actions demonstrate the impact that following Jesus has on our lives.

Therefore, speaking into the lives of those around us begins by building our own relationship with God. We can become a better witness to God and to the impact that he has on our lives when we live our lives connected closely to him.

This looks different for different people within different contexts. For us at Kirkersville we believe we build our relationship with God by continuing to be formed and developed by God. We expect that this will lead us to then being able to go into our communities and develop relationships with those around us.

We areformed by God and are able to help others become formed by God when we spend time with God in prayer and listening. We are able to receive insights on who God wants to connect us with and what we are supposed to say when we rely on God each and every day.

The closer we are to God the easier it can become for us to help God in leading those around us into a relationship with him. We should desire to be this conduit between God and those around us because of what God has done for us.

We alsoshould choose to develop our understanding of God. The better that we know God the easier it can become for us to tell those around us about God. We should study his word, and/or listen to devotionals.

It is through understanding the word of God that allows us to understand God better. It is when we understand God better that we are able to have our actions reflect the way that God desires for us to live our lives.

Our first reading speaks of this by offering us advice on how to treat those around us. It is often through our treatment of others that can help build stronger relationships with others.

First,we need to choose to be “quick to hear and slow to speak.” We shouldfocus on listening to those around us. Many times, we become so worried about what we are going to say to someone that we are not truly listening to what they are telling us.

This cando two things. It can cause us to not understand what we are being told and can lead the person speaking to us to believe they are not being heard. We need to listen attentively to those around us in order to build strong trusting relationships.

We areto choose to be doers and not only hearers of the word. We are called to be people of action. Jesus didn’t only speak regarding the words of his father, he acted on those words. He showed God to those around him through his actions. It is why we speak of here at Kirkersville about going out into our communities.

Jesus showed us what it means to be people of compassion. Believers in him are willing to try to emulate him by being his hands and feet. By showing the love of God to those that are around us.

We arecalled to be people of action. Many times, it is through our actions that will lead those around us into asking why we are doing what we are doing. Our actions than can lead us to use our words to express to those around us our love of God and God’s love for each one of us.

We should live in the world but not of the world. This iseasier said than done. It is easy for us to allow the world to corrupt us. It can be easy for our focus to turn to things that will make us seem better to the world but may hurt our relationship with God.

We areto as James 1:27 tells us to “keep ourselves unstained from the world.” We are to live lives that reflect the ways of God instead of the ways of the world. This would mean choosing to follow the fruit of the Spirit: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, 23 gentleness, self-control” instead of the ways of the world which often focuses on selfishness, greed, and power.

We areto live lives differently than those around us. We are to choose to show peace and patience to those around us even if they don’t offer the same to us. We are to treat each person as a child of God.

Our scripture ends with a reminder that God is listening and will respond to our requests. We are not on our own. Our relationshipswith those around us and our relationship with God are intertwined when we are willing to ask for God to assist us in serving him and in serving those around us.

God iswith us through the good, the bad, and the ugly of life and he wants us to use our life experiences to let those around us to know that he desires to be with them. God wants us to listen to the troubles of those around us.

He wants us to build relationships to the point that they can trust us and believe it when we tell them about the one that first loved them. Let us be willing to show the love of God to those that God places before us and let us focus on showing that love to those that we have been united with in relationships.