Top Ten Ways to Know You're Having a Bad Day

These are the top ten ways to tell if you’re having a bad day.

Number 10 - Your horn sticks on the freeway behind 32 Hell's Angels

Number 9 - You call suicide prevention and they put you on hold.

Number 8 - Your birthday cake collapses from the weight of the candles.

Number 7 - Your 4-year-old tells you that it's almost impossible to flush a grapefruit down the toilet.

Number 6 - It costs more to fill up your car than it did to buy it.

Number 5 - You wake up to the soothing sound of running water...and remember that you just bought a waterbed.

Number 4 - You compliment the boss' wife on her unusual perfume and she isn't wearing any.

Number 3 - Your doctor tells you that you are allergic to chocolate chip cookies.

Number 2 - You discover that your 12-year-old's idea of humor is putting crazy glue in your Preparation H.

Number 1 - Everyone is laughing but you.