Jesus' High View of Marriage (3)
Marriage, Family, and Sexuality • Sermon • Submitted • Presented
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-If you would, please turn to Matthew 19.
-Come to the NT
-Start with Jesus’ own teachings.
-Chosen Matthew 19 as a launching point, because:
Jesus is asked (specifically) what his view is.
What better place to begin?
Let’s Read:
Matthew 19:1–9 (ESV)
1 Now when Jesus had finished these sayings, he went away from Galilee and entered the region of Judea beyond the Jordan.
2 And large crowds followed him, and he healed them there.
3 And Pharisees came up to him and tested him by asking, “Is it lawful to divorce one’s wife for any cause?”
4 He answered, “Have you not read that he who created them from the beginning made them male and female,
5 and said, ‘Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh’?
6 So they are no longer two but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate.”
7 They said to him, “Why then did Moses command one to give a certificate of divorce and to send her away?”
8 He said to them, “Because of your hardness of heart Moses allowed you to divorce your wives, but from the beginning it was not so.
9 And I say to you: whoever divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another, commits adultery.”
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-We recently looked at passages...
…that show that kinship ties...
…are subordinate to the obligation of the Kingdom.
26 “If anyone comes to me and does not hate his own father and mother and wife and children and brothers and sisters, yes, and even his own life, he cannot be my disciple.
34 “Do not think that I have come to bring peace to the earth. I have not come to bring peace, but a sword.
35 For I have come to set a man against his father, and a daughter against her mother, and a daughter-in-law against her mother-in-law.
36 And a person’s enemies will be those of his own household.
37 Whoever loves father or mother more than me is not worthy of me, and whoever loves son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me.
But, does this imply that...
…because Jesus emphasized...
…the higher spiritual calling of discipleship...
…that he held a low view of marriage?
I’d say the very opposite is true.
Context:
Matthew 19:1–2 (ESV)
1 Now when Jesus had finished these sayings, he went away from Galilee and entered the region of Judea beyond the Jordan.
2 And large crowds followed him, and he healed them there.
Matthew 19:3 (ESV)
3 And Pharisees came up to him and tested him by asking, “Is it lawful to divorce one’s wife for any cause?”
How would this be testing Jesus?
Teaching contrary to the Law
For example: Matthew 5.27-28
Matthew 5:27–28 (ESV)
27 “You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall not commit adultery.’
28 But I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lustful intent has already committed adultery with her in his heart.
The Law (2 places (explicitly)?):
13 “If any man takes a wife and goes in to her and then hates her
14 and accuses her of misconduct and brings a bad name upon her, saying, ‘I took this woman, and when I came near her, I did not find in her evidence of virginity,’
15 then the father of the young woman and her mother shall take and bring out the evidence of her virginity to the elders of the city in the gate.
16 And the father of the young woman shall say to the elders, ‘I gave my daughter to this man to marry, and he hates her;
17 and behold, he has accused her of misconduct, saying, “I did not find in your daughter evidence of virginity.” And yet this is the evidence of my daughter’s virginity.’ And they shall spread the cloak before the elders of the city.
18 Then the elders of that city shall take the man and whip him,
19 and they shall fine him a hundred shekels of silver and give them to the father of the young woman, because he has brought a bad name upon a virgin of Israel. And she shall be his wife. He may not divorce her all his days.
20 But if the thing is true, that evidence of virginity was not found in the young woman,
21 then they shall bring out the young woman to the door of her father’s house, and the men of her city shall stone her to death with stones, because she has done an outrageous thing in Israel by whoring in her father’s house. So you shall purge the evil from your midst.
22 “If a man is found lying with the wife of another man, both of them shall die, the man who lay with the woman, and the woman. So you shall purge the evil from Israel.
Trying to promote/encourage divorce?
Deuteronomy 24:1–4 (ESV)
1 “When a man takes a wife and marries her, if then she finds no favor in his eyes because he has found some indecency in her, and he writes her a certificate of divorce and puts it in her hand and sends her out of his house, and she departs out of his house,
2 and if she goes and becomes another man’s wife,
3 and the latter man hates her and writes her a certificate of divorce and puts it in her hand and sends her out of his house, or if the latter man dies, who took her to be his wife,
4 then her former husband, who sent her away, may not take her again to be his wife, after she has been defiled, for that is an abomination before the Lord. And you shall not bring sin upon the land that the Lord your God is giving you for an inheritance.
1.) Only permitted in the case of “indecency”
2.) Must provide a certificate (indicating cause (meant to protect women)).
3.) Can’t remarry (if either marries in between).
Meant to encourage or discourage?
-Even more going on behind the scenes in our text:
A.) Jesus was in the jurisdiction of Herod Antipas
B.) No matter how he answered...
…he would upset some group.
RSB explains:
The Pharisees’ question seems to reflect the opinion of Hillel, a rabbi who allowed divorce for the slightest reasons by interpreting “some indecency” in Deut. 24:1–4 very broadly.
A rival teacher, Shammai, regarded only sexual unchastity as proper grounds.
Jesus’ answer transcends this debate about the wording of Deuteronomy and returns to the order of creation by God (Gen. 2:24). — Reformation Study Bible
Matthew 19:4 (ESV)
4 He answered, “Have you not read that he who created them from the beginning made them male and female,
That’s a transcendent authority (elaborate)
Creation Designs:
Genesis 1:27 (ESV)
27 So God created man in his own image, in the image of God he created him; male and female he created them.
Binary
Genesis 2:18 (ESV)
18 Then the Lord God said, “It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper fit for him.”
Binary and Complimentary
Genesis 2:21–23 (ESV)
21 So the Lord God . . . took one of his ribs and closed up its place with flesh.
22 And the rib that the Lord God had taken from the man he made into a woman and brought her to the man.
23 Then the man said, “This at last is bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man.”
Binary
Complimentary
Heterosexual
Matthew 19:4–5 (ESV)
4 He answered, “Have you not read that he who created them from the beginning made them male and female,
5 and said, ‘Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh’?
Something metaphysical happening.
Daniel Doriani makes a good observation here:
To leave father and mother is to leave the strongest bond of our early life. Marriage is the single most lasting relationship in life.
Children grow up and leave home. Brothers and sisters form their own families. Friendships are fragile and transitory.
Marriage is the one relationship in which people live in the same house, eat at the same table, and sleep in the same bed as long as they both shall live.
Husband and wife promise to love and trust each other, to endure with one another, without preconditions. — Doriani
What’s he quoting (and adding to)?
Genesis 2:24 (ESV)
24 Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.
Binary
Complimentary
Heterosexual
Monogamous
This is a creation ordinance.
It transcends the covenants (like the Sabbath, etc.).
-On this basis, he makes this statement:
Matthew 19:6 (ESV)
6 So they are no longer two but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate.”
Malachi 2:15 (ESV)
15 Did he not make them one, with a portion of the Spirit in their union? ...
I LOVE what Calvin says here:
Now Christ assumes as an admitted principle, that at the beginning God joined the male to the female, so that the two made an entire man;
and therefore he who divorces his wife tears from him, as it were, the half of himself. But nature does not allow any man to tear in pieces his own body. — Calvin
Binary
Complimentary
Heterosexual
Monogamous
PERMANENT (Indissoluble).
And, Verse 7 shows us...
…that this is exactly how they understood it:
Matthew 19:7 (ESV)
7 They said to him, “Why then did Moses command one to give a certificate of divorce and to send her away?”
Did Moses “command” that?
Only in a qualified sense:
In the sense that he couldn’t just put her away mysteriously.
He had to tell why.
Protected her honor.
Like Slavery, it wasn’t as though he was commanding divorce...
He was regulating it in the civil Law...
…to protect the innocent from tyranny and abuse.
Jesus clarifies that in:
Matthew 5:31–32 (ESV)
31 “It was also said, ‘Whoever divorces his wife, let him give her a certificate of divorce.’
32 But I say to you that everyone who divorces his wife, except on the ground of sexual immorality, makes her commit adultery, and whoever marries a divorced woman commits adultery.
Jesus explains the Civil Law in Verse 8:
Matthew 19:8 (ESV)
8 He said to them, “Because of your hardness of heart Moses allowed you to divorce your wives, but from the beginning it was not so.
WSNT observes something important:
The verb is in the perfect tense (denoting the continuance of past action or its results down to the present).
He means: Notwithstanding Moses’ permission, the case has not been so from the beginning until now.
The original ordinance has never been abrogated nor superseded, but continues in force — WSNT
He makes it clear in Verse 9:
Matthew 19:9 (ESV)
9 And I say to you: whoever divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another, commits adultery.”
2 Views on this (primary)
1.) Permanence View
“Pornea” can only be pre-marriage betrothal violation.
19 And her husband Joseph, being a just man and unwilling to put her to shame, resolved to divorce her quietly.
"divorce” before marriage...
…because of finality of a betrothal.
I.e., this gives NO cause for divorce...
…from a marriage like ours AT ALL.
2.) “Pornea” is a de facto dissolution of the marriage union:
1 Corinthians 6:16 (ESV)
16 Or do you not know that he who is joined to a prostitute becomes one body with her? For, as it is written, “The two will become one flesh.”
In other words...
…divorce would not be a violation of the one flesh union...
…but a recognition of the dissolution...
…that had already occured through an act/acts of “porneia.”
Which is it?
I’m not sure, but the latter is...
…by far the prevailing view of today.
Does it change Jesus’ fundamental position either way?
Is something wrong...
…when we go to the Bible...
…to look for Justification?
Even if Jesus permits it for “Pornea” . . .
Is it required?
Is it for the best?
Tell the Story of Todd’s question
Here’s what’s more important than our temporal happiness:
Ephesians 5:31–33 (ESV)
31 “Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.”
32 This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church.
Marriage is a picture of the Gospel.
That’s the most important consideration!