Caring for the Fatherless (Exodus 22:22–24)

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We have a growing problem in our country that few are addressing: fatherlessness. It's one thing to decry this darkness, but how might we turn on a light? Watch/listen here: http://www.sermonaudio.com/sermon/1010231748387419

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Series: TopicalText: Exodus 22:22–24
By: Shaun Marksbury Date: October 8, 2023
Venue: Living Water Baptist ChurchOccasion: AM Service

Introduction

Many of you, like me, have been watching a growing crisis of fatherlessness in this country. The common statistics I’m seeing is that fatherlessness is one of the leading indicators that a child will grow up in poverty, have poor grades, suffer mental distress, engage in drug usage, and become incarcerated. Having worked with the local sheriff’s department as a chaplain, I can confirm that the most common characteristic I saw with incarcerated men was fatherlessness. This, more than ethnicity or economic status, seemed to unite many of the jailed — with many of the men themselves having children outside the jail walls.
According to the CDC, as of this year, the percent of all births to unmarried women has risen to 40.0%. Some of that, of course, is due to the number of children unwed mothers have with various men. The whole picture here includes men who refuse to commit to marriage and women who believe their children are most benefited without the corrupting and even abusive presence of these fathers. And, as we’ve noted before, some women are simply choosing it’s better to be single mothers and to never marry.
There are also times, of course, where both parents are out of the picture (due to death, incarceration, abandonment, or a court determination of parental unfitness). With that, the number of orphans are on the rise. As one journal article notes, “More than 400,000 children are in the United States foster care system; approximately 107,000 children of these children are available for adoption.” The American public has stepped up to try to alleviate this problem, consistently adopting between 118,000 and 125,000 children per year since the 1980s, but this is still an ongoing problem, especially with so many more avoiding traditional family structures today.
The lack of a cohesive family structure, especially lacking the father in the home, affects children in multifaceted ways. According to Fathers in the Field, half of our children grow up without a biological father in the home, and children from fatherless families account for:
63% of youth suicides
71% of pregnant teenagers
90% of runaway or homeless kids
85% of youth sitting in prisons
71% of high school dropouts
75% of teens in drug treatment
We can understand, then, part of the reason God has such detailed laws for His people in Scripture. If everyone continues to do what is right in their own eyes, as they did in the Book of Judges, our society cannot continue to survive. If the Lord had not intervened in Israel’s history when the people went astray, then there would have been no hope for the people to have survived until the coming Messiah.
So, through Moses, the Lord gave the people clear commandments to shape and structure their society in a God-honoring way. In this chapter, He gives case laws to help the children of Israel see how the Ten Commandments applied in various situations. While we’re not under the Law in the same way today, this passage helps us to see what practical holiness looks like amongst God’s people.
In this passage, we see a command to protect the most vulnerable in society, and we’ll note three truths here pertaining to the fatherless. First, God calls His people to protect the fatherless. Second, God hears the cry of the fatherless. Third, God punishes those who harm the fatherless.

First, God calls His people to protect the fatherless (v. 22)

You shall not afflict any widow or orphan.
This is a big point, and I’m going to spend most of our time here. Let’s start by considering the terminology here. First, the widow, of course, is a wife who has lost her husband. Unfortunately, in addition to dealing with the loss of her love, she has also lost provision and protection. There were no 401ks, life insurance policies, social security payouts, or retirement plans back then. A widow without family was especially at risk in the world. We’ll talk more about these risks in just a moment.
Let’s consider next the term orphan. The Hebrew term is yātôm, and the Greek translation of that is orphanos. While the term can most often today refer to the loss of both parents, in the ancient world, it also referred to the loss of just a father. As one Bible dictionary notes, “There is no clear case where it means the loss of both parents. The Scriptures devote considerable attention to the widow and orphan, and the idea is that the child is fatherless.” As such, the biblical understanding of the term “orphan” is fatherless, one who has lost a father due to war or some tragedy.
If that is the case, then both the child (or children) and the mother are a protected class. As another Bible encyclopedia notes, “The idea describes any person who is without legal standing in the covenant community of Israel, who is unprotected or needy, and who is especially exposed to oppression.” As such, God gives biblical commands to protect the defenseless.
Why are they defenseless? The father provided for and protected the family (how novel!). However, again, children and even women often lacked legal standing in court or “in the gate” (cf. Job 31:21). With the father gone, a widow and her children lost provision and were at risk in the community of loss of property (Ps. 109:10; Prov. 23:10; Lam. 5:2–3) and of livelihood (Prov. 23:10; Job 24:3). The fatherless would be forced to beg (Ps. 109:9–10), may become bartered as property (Job 6:27), or even murdered (Psa. 94:6).
So, again, God commanded His people to protect the orphan. We see it here, stated in the negative, “You shall not afflict any widow or orphan.” Understand that this isn’t a command only to avoid an action, but an implicit command to do good. For instance, Exodus 20:14 commands, “You shall not commit adultery,” but in the sense of the command to “Love your neighbor as yourself” (Rom. 13:9) — it’s a command to love our spouses, to leave and to cleave to one’s wife (Gen. 2:24). The commands of Scripture have both a positive and a negative application.
So, the command against afflicting the fatherless must include a command to protect the fatherless, for the lack of protecting them would lead to their exploitation. This is something that the prophet Isaiah noted in Isaiah 1:17: “Learn to do good; seek justice, reprove the ruthless, defend the orphan [or ‘fatherless’], plead for the widow.” Likewise, Zechariah says, “Dispense true justice and practice kindness and compassion each to his brother; and do not oppress the widow or the orphan, the stranger or the poor; and do not devise evil in your hearts against one another” (Zech. 7:9–10). We see the positive and negative together.
This isn’t just in the Old Testament, either. The prominent use of this term in the New Testament is in James 1:27 — “Pure and undefiled religion in the sight of our God and Father is this: to visit orphans and widows in their distress, and to keep oneself unstained by the world.” James continues in 2:15–16 — “If a brother or sister is without clothing and in need of daily food, and one of you says to them, ‘Go in peace, be warmed and be filled,’ and yet you do not give them what is necessary for their body, what use is that?” Our help should be practical and necessary.
Another reference of note is Acts 6:1, where there is concern that Christian widows are being ignored. The church takes steps in that chapter to correct this oversight through the appointing of deacons. Later on, Paul will write, “Honor widows who are widows indeed” (1 Tim. 5:3), meaning that the church should determine whether someone has outside means of provision and then provide needed assistance.
Of course, the church historically has helped both the orphan and the widow. In fact, it was the Christian worldview which brought about care for the orphaned and abandoned children in the Roman Empire. As one article notes, “The early Christian church did attempt to care for abandoned children and adults who were sick or aged.” In many cases, those children were adopted into Christian families.
For a quick survey of the literature, we could first consider this in early second century writings. As one dictionary notes, “St. Ignatius (Ep. ad. Smyrn. cap. vi.) mentions it as one of the marks of the heterodox that ‘they care not for the widow, the orphan, or the distressed.’ Again and again in the Apostolical Constitutions exhortations are given concerning them to the bishop to protect them, to individual Christians to remember them in their charity and, if possible, to adopt them.” Later on, in the fourth century, Constantine appointed endowments for orphans to which he also contributed. A church cleric would serve as a guardian of orphans as noted in the Council of Chalcedon in the fifth century, heading orphanages and hospitals. In Constantinople, the priest serving as the public guardian of orphans was an orphanotrophus. This work continued through the Middle Ages. Often, “monasteries and convents accepted abandoned children,” and they continued to receive care throughout the Reformation period.
It should be no surprise then that the term “orphanage” is Christian in origin. It may have originated with Cotton Mather in the early 1700s, who wrote of the need as an act of divine providence; “Need for such care was caused by the terrible conditions of the Industrial Revolution when parents were thrown into debtors’ prisons and children were forced to work in crude factories, leaving many children without homes or parents.” Later, C. H. Spurgeon, with a gift in hand from a church member, opened the Stockwell Orphanage in 1867; one article describes it as such:
By the end of 1867, four boys’ houses had been opened at Stockwell, followed during the 1880s by five houses for girls. Located on the Clapham Road, south of the River Thames, the row of boys’ houses faced a similar row of girls’ houses across an area of lawns and open play areas. Both the boys’ and girls’ institutions aimed to provide for the “free and gratuitous residence, maintenance, clothing, instruction, and education of destitute, fatherless children.”
This is a very brief overview. There have been reams of material from Christians on this matter. Orphanages became a sign of Christian witness, planted around the world in countries lacking adequate care for the fatherless. Obviously, they also appeared here during the colonial period, like George Whitefield’s Bethesda (“House of Mercy”), still standing in Savannah, Georgia. This was a unique work amongst believers.
However, the state increasingly took on this care. Institutions rarely stay true to their founding vision, and abuses began to be apparent over time. As more individuals with competing ideas become involved in a work, it changes over time, and sometimes for the worse, as was happening in the United States.
As such, in 1909, the White House held a conference on children under Theodore Roosevelt. As one article notes, “The conference decided that the child’s own home was the best place for the child to be. This became the early beginning of the deinstitutionalization of dependent children.” That’s not a bad decision, as Christians originally fostered and adopted orphans. As others have noted, “Children raised in foster families and especially by relatives fare better developmentally than children raised in even the best orphanages.” The state decided to help single mothers to raise their children through welfare.
With the state taking a more active role in this issue, the church in the United States began to focus its efforts elsewhere. It’s been noted over time that more welfare from the state has resulted in a different kind of dependance, where some families decide that it is more fiscally beneficial to avoid marriage. What began as a help became an incentive for wrongdoing without the oversight of Christian ministries.
There still has been much success, but that’s only because some Christians continued caring about orphans — Barna reports that Christians are more than twice as likely to adopt than the general population in the United States. Yet, other ministries draw the interest of Christians, and one wonders if we could do more, like just coming alongside widows we know and help the fatherless. If the church decides this is the responsibility of the state, we will have abandoned the mission field on our doorstep.
We must beware. The Lord hears the cry of the fatherless, as we note next.

Second, God hears the cry of the fatherless (v. 23)

If you afflict him at all, and if he does cry out to Me, I will surely hear his cry;
There numerous examples in Scripture of the fatherless, like Lot (Gen. 11:27–28) and Esther (Esther 2:7). There are also many examples of God seeking to protect the property claims and inheritances of the fatherless. For instance, He commanded the community to meet their immediate material needs, telling laborers to leave extra sheafs of the field, leftover olives, and grapes on the vine so the widow and the fatherless would “come and eat and be satisfied” (Deut. 24:19–22, 29). He commanded that they also receive of the third-year tithes (26:12–13). In this way, they would have plenty of provision.
He sees the need of the orphan. Of course, there are needs beyond the material, as the fatherless suffer bereavement and other issues. There will be feelings of abandonment, grief, fear, anger, and loneliness. When a child’s biological father still lives in places unknown, the child will also experience self-doubt, wondering why his father chose to reject him.
With this comes developmental issues, as the child may experiences some stunting of growth. Because the fatherless may not mature properly in dealing with their emotional issues, they may look for male approval in the wrong ways. A boy, for instance, may be angry and desire to prove himself to others, engaging in dangerous activities. This can lead to the kinds of statistics we considered already.
The orphan must hear the hope of the Lord. The Lord says, “If you afflict him at all, and if he does cry out to Me, I will surely hear his cry.” The Lord recognizes our loneliness, saying of Adam, “It is not good for the man to be alone; I will make him a helper suitable for him” (Gen. 2:18). If a child loses one or both parents, the Lord sees and hears, especially if someone takes advantage of one of these little ones.
He promises us His presence. He is a “father of the fatherless and a judge for the widows” (Psa. 68:5). He is “near to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit” (Psa. 34:18). In the New Testament, Jesus says, “I will not leave you as orphans; I will come to you” (John 14:18). This gives us the sense of His heart on the matter, providing a helper for His people. That’s a precious promise, one that results with the sending of the Holy Spirit as our constant guide and companion. He certainly cares for the orphan!
He not only promises to be there, but to provide a defense. The Lord defends even when no one else does (cf. 2 Tim. 4:16–17). He commands, “Do not move the ancient boundary or go into the fields of the fatherless, for their Redeemer is strong; He will plead their case against you” (Prov. 23:1011). Those who take advantage of the orphan will find the Lord as their defender.
God provides, as well. Scripture says, “You have been the helper of the orphan” (Psa. 10:14). Later in the Book of Psalms, we read, “He supports the fatherless and the widow” (Psa. 146:9). He is a “father of the fatherless and a judge for the widows” (Psa. 68:5). He will ensure that their material needs are met.
Finally, the Lord also provides salvation. The orphan may feel as though he has offended God to deserve such a plight in life. The truth is that, while the orphan isn’t a greater sinner than anyone else (Luke 13:2), all have fallen short of the glory of God (Rom. 3:23). However, God offers the same gospel hope to the orphan as anyone else, as Hosea notes: “For in You the orphan finds mercy” (Hosea 14:3). The orphan isn’t unwanted by God; instead, God offers the orphan mercy and forgiveness for his sins!
This is all because God does hears the cry of the fatherless. He hears whether it be for spiritual or physical salvation — the Lord will work in some way. Of course, this is also a warning, which is abundantly clear in our final point:

Third, God punishes those who harm the fatherless

and My anger will be kindled, and I will kill you with the sword, and your wives shall become widows and your children fatherless.
God knows what the wicked do. So, He says in Malachi 3:5, “Then I will draw near to you for judgment,” singling out “those who oppress … the widow and the orphan.” He even promises His people here that their children will experience fatherlessness if they don’t care for the orphans as He commands. Certainly Jesus’s words in Luke 17:2 are applicable: “It would be better for him if a millstone were hung around his neck and he were thrown into the sea, than that he would cause one of these little ones to stumble.” The Lord takes note and will punish the evildoer.
Sadly, what we see in our country is increasing fatherlessness, and the lack of our masculine leadership is a sign of God’s judgement (Isa. 3:4, 12). Zechariah 10:2–3 speaks of this, noting that the people “wander like sheep, they are afflicted, because there is no shepherd. My anger is kindled against the shepherds, and I will punish the male goats; for the Lord of hosts has visited His flock, the house of Judah, and will make them like His majestic horse in battle.” The leaders were leading the people astray, so the Lord confused the people with contrary information, promising to punish the “male goats” or the men leading the people.
Yet, He gives hope that He can still lead the people, making the fighting men mighty for war despite the problems of those men they look up to. Sometimes He will do that through other people who can raise the fatherless up into true manhood. He can provide surrogates, father-figures, who will fulfill the task, teaching the proper disposition of manhood.

Conclusion

We don’t just have a crisis of fatherlessness today, we have a crisis of masculinity. Men should protect and provide for their families, but they’ve gone absent. It’s easy for us to sit back and say people should just make better choices. If, however, we’re open to the work of the Lord, He may use us to help some of the hurt lives around us.
Children in these unfortunate situations lack the spiritual care that comes uniquely though the church. So, what can we do to help? First, we have to know what God’s Word commands, and we have to ask the Lord to shape our hearts according to His will. If He says we should care for the plight of the defenseless and we don’t, we need to repent and seek Him for that grace. We can’t blame the children, for instance, for the sins of the parents; we need to instead cultivate a heart of compassion by His grace.
Second, we should seek to care and comfort the fatherless we know. We need Christians who will prayerfully consider the mission field in front of us. It may be that the Lord is leading you to engage in tangible displays of the gospel, opening your home to foster care and even adoption. It may also be that you can become a male role model through our new ministry here, Fathers in the Field. If that is not quite where the Lord is leading, then it may be to support this church and specifically, this new effort to reach out.
Those statistics I shared at the beginning can be distressing. However, it’s one thing to decry the darkness — its another to turn on a light. Let’s be open to the Lord’s leading on this issue.
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