The Mystery of Marriage

A Household Code

Ephesians 5:22-6:9, Colossians 3:18-4:1, and I Peter 2:18-3:7 are often grouped together under a heading called the “Household Code” of scripture.

These refer to a set of ethical and moral instructions found in several books of the New Testament that pertain to various relationships within a household or family structure. These codes were written to provide guidance on how to maintain order and virtuous behavior in the social structures of the ancient world, particularly within the context of the early Christian community.

We actually covered the Colossians 3:18 passage back in February of 2022, so I’m happy to say that rather than preach it again— I’ve asked some of our friends to join me in sharing today!

In trying to make this time the best and most practical that it can be: So I’ve asked for some help today! I’ve asked a couple friends to join me up on the platform and talk a little more deeply about their experience in marriage.

Introduction:

a. Briefly introduce yourselves, including how long you've been married, where you live, and how many children and grandchildren you have.

Now this passage starts out with a bit of controversy: Some scholars would believe that this statement is not necessarily at the end of the previous section— or some believe its a header or “title” of sorts— other believe there shouldn’t be any break here at all!

Ephesians 5:21 NIV

21 Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.

Mutual Love, Respect and Support:

a. How do you show respect and appreciation for each other in your daily lives?

b. In what ways do you support each other's personal and/or professional goals?

c. Give some examples of how you have divided your roles and responsibilities within your home?

There are three primary sections of the text if we look at it closely— a section addressing the wife— and then a section addressing the husband, then a final section that kind of wraps it all up.

Ephesians 5:22 NIV

22 Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord.

Ephesians 5:23 NIV

23 For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior.

This is now a question for the wives:

Shared Values and Goals:

a. How have you worked to set goals in your family that you both can agree upon?

b. How do you handle situations where your values or goals may differ?

Now for the fellas:

Ephesians 5:25 NIV

25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her

Roles and Responsibilities:

a. How have you and your spouse approached balancing a career, home, and parenting?

b. Are there certain expectations that each of you have for each other?

in verse 31, Paul quotes an Old Testament passage Genesis 2:24“24 That is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife, and they become one flesh.” :

Ephesians 5:31 NIV

31 “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.”

He goes on to mention that this is a profound mystery.

Overcoming Challenges:

a. What are some ways that adversity has made your marriage stronger?

b. What advice might you give to any couples that are struggling right now?

c. Are there any specific bible verses that have given you comfort or guidance on your marriage?

Ephesians 5:33 NIV

33 However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.

This is a powerful command. We often want to shy away from the part that speaks to us— and focus on the part that speaks to our partner! That’s not what God intends for us.

Final encouragement:

a. How has your journey together enriched your life and brought you closer to Jesus?

Each of these couples are wonderful examples of a real-life partnership. It’s a tangible and observable example of Christ and the Church.

We all represent the body of Christ— the church. We submit ourselves to Jesus through all our relationships, for those of us who are married, we have the added blessing and responsibility to live and grow with another person.

Let’s give these couples our appreciation, and thank them for being up front today.

Let’s pray:

A Blessing of Marriage - From the Common Book of Prayer:

From The Book of Common Prayer

Most gracious God, we give you thanks for your tender love

in sending Jesus Christ to come among us, to be born of a

human mother, and to make the way of the cross to be the

way of life. We thank you, also, for consecrating the union of

man and woman in marriages. By the power of your Holy

Spirit, pour out the abundance of your blessing upon the marriages of our church.

Defend them from every enemy.

Lead them into all peace. Let their love for each other be a seal

upon their hearts, a mantle about their shoulders, and a

crown upon their foreheads. Bless them in their work and in

their companionship; in their sleeping and in their waking; in

their joys and in their sorrows; in their life and in their death.

In the name of our Lord Jesus Christ- Amen