God, Guys & Girls (Part 2)

Intro:

Tell personal story about using the word “love”

Easy to use word too quickly in relationships

Used it early on in high school dating relationship

Saying it to Samie for the first time

Saying “I love you” without saying it

Samie says it

Then I say it

Tonight: Focusing in on “love”

Its true meaning

Will contrast it with another word

Body:

Biblical understanding of love

2 passages

1st passage: 1 John 3-4.

1 John 4:7–8 (NLT)

7 Dear friends, let us continue to love one another, for love comes from God. Anyone who loves is a child of God and knows God. 8 But anyone who does not love does not know God, for God is love.

God is the source of love

So much so that He IS love

Knowing love = knowing God

2nd passage: 1 Corinthians 13.

1 Corinthians 13:4–7 (NLT)

4 Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud 5 or rude. It does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged. 6 It does not rejoice about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. 7 Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance.

Pair up with someone as share: What statement(s) about love really sticks out to you and why?

2 things that stick out to me:

Love takes a lot of work

Tall order/fulfilled by Jesus

Verse 5: “is not self-seeking.”

Love isn’t about what we get out of it.

Love is selfless.

Counter to what we see today in culture

Using the word loosely

“I love my husband”

I love tacos.”

We limit it to a feeling

It is a feeling, but also an action and a choice

Limit to feeling = selling it short.

Calling certain actions and attitudes love that really aren’t love at all

Being really “in like”

Selfish desire to get what we want emotionally or physically

Mixing up love with another word:

What is Lust?

Some of us jump to looking at stuff on the internet that you shouldn’t

It plays into that, but there is more to it

Lust takes places in our thoughts and minds

What the bible says about lust:

Lust is about things.

Love is always directed towards people

Loving things = lust

Lusting over person = turning them into an object

Lust is a feeling.

Fleshly desires

Limit love to feeling = danger of lusting

Lust is selfish.

Focused on personal gain and satisfaction

Biggest difference with love.

Sum it up in a simple statement:

Lust is selfish. Love is selfless.

Difference between to words that look so similar

Getting mixes up if we are not careful

Nasty effects of being driven by lust

Ephesians 4:18–20 (NLT)

18 Their minds are full of darkness; they wander far from the life God gives because they have closed their minds and hardened their hearts against him. 19 They have no sense of shame. They live for lustful pleasure and eagerly practice every kind of impurity.

20 But that isn’t what you learned about Christ.

How lustful living affects us:

It darkens our understanding.

We lose sensitivity.

It leaves us wanting more.

Elephant in the room

Explain what the phrase means

Elephant = porn

We need to talk about it

Some people say “so what? What’s the big deal?”

They are wrong

Porn changes your brain

The same chemicals your brain releases with hard drugs

Coming back for more

Brain rewrites itself > you crave it

Addiction

Controls you; take away everything

Awkward to talk about bc shame

I don’t want you to feel shame tonight

Shame = “I’m a terrible person”

This struggle doesn’t make that statement true

The goal = conviction

Conviction = “I’m involved in something terrible.”

Also, don’t feel stuck

Understandable bc drug

YOU CAN FIND FREEDOM!

Steps to consider:

Come clean

First to God

Admit the problem and your desire to change

Get help!

Don’t need to face alone

Toughest step

Don’t need to share with entire world, but someone you trust and is further on their journey

Small group

Mentor

Me

Parent

Embrace God’s grace

Victory isn’t in own strength

Only found in death and resurrection (perfect display of selfless love)

He is our source of strength

Set up boundaries

Consider times and ways you are most tempted

Taking drastic steps

Principle found in Bible:

Matthew 5:29–30 (NLT)

29 So if your eye—even your good eye—causes you to lust, gouge it out and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to be thrown into hell. 30 And if your hand—even your stronger hand—causes you to sin, cut it off and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to be thrown into hell.

Hyberpole

Struggling = moving towards addiction levels

“Cutting off” some items in your life

Smart phone

Parents putting restrictions on your friends

Taking a break from hanging out with “that” group of friends.

Final thoughts:

Heavy subject

Thanks for receiving it well

I love you. We love you

Most importantly, Jesus loves you

Lust is selfish. Love is selfless

Open up in small groups

PRAY