Lies We Believe Part 2: I'm Worthless

Introduction

I was reading a book by Jennie Allen called “Get out of Your head: Stopping the Spiral of Toxic Thoughts”. It’s A good book aimed at women focusing in on those toxic thoughts that spiral out of control.

In the book she states that here friend, a licensed therapist, told her that every lie we tell ourselves is rooted in one of these three lies.

I’m helpless.

I’m worthless.

I’m unlovable.

As I read I thought wow I wonder if that is true. I know I too have had negative thoughts like that

So as where I don’t remember by Psych 101 class enough to tell you if that is what is being taught. I did feel it was important enough to sit down and have the conversation. So for the next 3 weeks wee are going to look at these three lies. Maybe you are believing this about yourself right now.

Lie #2: I’m Worthless

Why do people Struggle so much with the feelings of worthlessness?

Why do we feel worthless?

When we struggle with worthlessness we have lost our true Identity.

Our what our identity is wrapped up in determinants our worth.

Example:

Work - Many a people especially men wrap themselves up in work. It is who they are. I’m John i’m a mechanic. when that goes away because of lose of job, retirement, injury, whatever. We loose that sense of purpose and Identity and that leaves us feeling worthless. Not saying being a teacher or mechanic isn’t a wonderful part of who you are but when it is your core identity

Family - Identity found only in family leaves us worthless, when we can’t have any more kids. The kids leave the house. No one to take care of anymore. God forbid a death takes place. I have failed in being my identity because Something often out of our control has happened.

Sex - If your identity is in your sexual nature. I had a student once that when I asked them how they were doing today they responded I’m gay (homosexual). Ok, that’s not really what I asked. But this student identity was wrapped up only in their sexual orientation. When that is our identity it leaves us worthless when we can’t perform, aren’t meeting the social norms for that gender, sex, label whatever.

Self - When we put our identity in self we feel good and feel bad dependent on our view of self. We have a low self esteem when we don’t view our self in high enough regard. When our focus in on self we tend to compare ourselves with others. that is a trap that will lead you to no where good fast.

For Christians who know their Identity should be wrapped up in Christ often feel feel inferior, often wonder if there’s something wrong with them, and often is there something wrong with God.

This is a Christian environment here So I am going to talk to you as Christians. If you do not fit into that, to mean you have not accepted Christ as your Lord and Savior. What I am saying may or may not apply to you. If you are not a Christian and feeling worthless I would love to sit down with you this week and counsel with you. Please contact the church so we can set up an appointment. That Goes for Christians too.

Twisted

If you have a twisted view of God, you’ll probably adopt a distorted view of yourself.

So where do twisted views come from? Let’s look at three of them.

Childhood Influences

Often the important people in your childhood told you in words and/or actions that you didn’t matter. Did your dad abandon you? Was your mom emotionally unavailable? Did a relative or family friend poke fun at you?

Perhaps you wore glasses or had carrot-colored hair or were super skinny or a bit chunky. When people who ought to build you up tore you down instead, you began to believe their lies. Their lies said: You’re worthless.

Sometimes it spurs from their family calling them worthless. Then you are told that your dad is supposed to be the God figure in your household but doesn't really show you God. Just tells you are going to hell. So, you think that God only sees you as worthless because a parental figure made you feel that way. Then you are told by your school teachers that you are worthless because you can't make good grades.

Recurring Hurts

In life, you may experience compounding hurts of a broken marriage, a teenage son or daughter who refuses Christian values, the pain of office gossip, or a traumatic event like bankruptcy, the death of a loved one, or even robbery or rape.

Every time I see a guy who looks like the creep who held a gun to my head, I think, ‘Why did he pick me? Why did God allow X to happen to me? Am I not as good as...

Bad Choices

People pleasing, drug use, promiscuity—these are a few of the bad choices some people make to counteract feelings of worthlessness.

Getting Free of the Worthless Trap

Like mold in a shower, lies blacken your beliefs about yourself. Repeat: You are not a failure! Every believer is a precious son or daughter of the Most High God! Your worth is rooted in Christ.

1 Peter 2:4 NIV

4 As you come to him, the living Stone—rejected by humans but chosen by God and precious to him—

Jesus was rejected by men. More important, he was chosen by God.

When God sent Jesus Christ to earth in order to pay the price for your sins and mine on the cross, he declared your precious worth. Will you continue believing the lie that you’re worthless when God has proven you have great worth?

Here’s an another amazing truth:

Christ gave his life for you in order to give his life to you so that he could live his live through you.

2 Corinthians 12:9–10 NIV

9 But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. 10 That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.

2 Corinthians 12:9-10 says that a person is content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and difficulties for Christ's sake. When a person is weak, then they are strong.

The Bible also says that people may feel unworthy of God's love because they commit sin. However, God gave his life for people and sacrificed for them. To feel worthy of God's love, people need to repent of their sins.

Three Actions to Take

Taken from https://biblicalcounselingcenter.org/feel-worthless-reject-lies-believe/

1. Recognize that God wants to bless you. He is for you. You belong to him, and he wants you to experience the abundant life.

John 10:10 NIV

10 The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full.

2. Determine to want what God wants: a loving relationship with Jesus. Let go of lesser pleasures that entice. Seek the greatest pleasure and spend your life enjoying God.

Colossians 2:6–7 NIV

6 So then, just as you received Christ Jesus as Lord, continue to live your lives in him, 7 rooted and built up in him, strengthened in the faith as you were taught, and overflowing with thankfulness.

3. Embrace the truth that God uses the pain of trials, including feelings of worthlessness, to deepen your desire for the highest dream.

1 Peter 1:6–7 NIV

6 In all this you greatly rejoice, though now for a little while you may have had to suffer grief in all kinds of trials. 7 These have come so that the proven genuineness of your faith—of greater worth than gold, which perishes even though refined by fire—may result in praise, glory and honor when Jesus Christ is revealed.

Next Steps

Isn’t it wonderful to know that you belong to God? That you can enjoy him? That your pain has a purpose: to become more and more like Jesus?

God saw enough value in you that He gave his Son to redeem you. He created every part of you and knows you better than you know yourself. He knows how many hairs are on your head. That sounds like you are incredibly valuable to Him.

Bliography

https://www.faithfullystepping.com/3-lies-i-buy-into-that-show-what-i-believe-about-god

Allen, Jennie. Get Out of Your Head: Stopping the Spiral of Toxic Thoughts

https://biblicalcounselingcenter.org/feel-worthless-reject-lies-believe/