Help Us to Forgive

-What is the most difficult task you have ever attempted in life? asking or giving forgiveness has to be close to the top of the list. Why would I say that? Because it stands between husbands and wives, parents and children. I know of siblings who will not speak to each other because of holding grudges over an inheritance

-The Bible is clear on how we have been given forgiveness with God

-The Bible is also clear on how we are to forgive others

We Forgive because We have been Forgiven

Ephesians 4:25–32 ESV

25 Therefore, having put away falsehood, let each one of you speak the truth with his neighbor, for we are members one of another. 26 Be angry and do not sin; do not let the sun go down on your anger, 27 and give no opportunity to the devil. 28 Let the thief no longer steal, but rather let him labor, doing honest work with his own hands, so that he may have something to share with anyone in need. 29 Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear. 30 And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, by whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. 31 Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice. 32 Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.

1 John 3:11–18 ESV

11 For this is the message that you have heard from the beginning, that we should love one another. 12 We should not be like Cain, who was of the evil one and murdered his brother. And why did he murder him? Because his own deeds were evil and his brother’s righteous. 13 Do not be surprised, brothers, that the world hates you. 14 We know that we have passed out of death into life, because we love the brothers. Whoever does not love abides in death. 15 Everyone who hates his brother is a murderer, and you know that no murderer has eternal life abiding in him. 16 By this we know love, that he laid down his life for us, and we ought to lay down our lives for the brothers. 17 But if anyone has the world’s goods and sees his brother in need, yet closes his heart against him, how does God’s love abide in him? 18 Little children, let us not love in word or talk but in deed and in truth.

We Forgive out of Obedience to God

-Forgiveness is not a feeling and it does not mean there are no consequences to the wrong that has been committed

-Many say, I cannot forgive so and so, because I just don’t feel like I can, forgiveness is not based on our feelings, but it is a commitment, it is a choice.

-Now think about it with me for a moment - what if we did everything based on feelings - we may never do anything that is right and good.

-Alistiar Begg said: to forgive is to say I will not bring this up to you again, I will not speak about with another person agains, nor will I rehearse it in mind.

Matthew 18:21–35 ESV

21 Then Peter came up and said to him, “Lord, how often will my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? As many as seven times?” 22 Jesus said to him, “I do not say to you seven times, but seventy-seven times. 23 “Therefore the kingdom of heaven may be compared to a king who wished to settle accounts with his servants. 24 When he began to settle, one was brought to him who owed him ten thousand talents. 25 And since he could not pay, his master ordered him to be sold, with his wife and children and all that he had, and payment to be made. 26 So the servant fell on his knees, imploring him, ‘Have patience with me, and I will pay you everything.’ 27 And out of pity for him, the master of that servant released him and forgave him the debt. 28 But when that same servant went out, he found one of his fellow servants who owed him a hundred denarii, and seizing him, he began to choke him, saying, ‘Pay what you owe.’ 29 So his fellow servant fell down and pleaded with him, ‘Have patience with me, and I will pay you.’ 30 He refused and went and put him in prison until he should pay the debt. 31 When his fellow servants saw what had taken place, they were greatly distressed, and they went and reported to their master all that had taken place. 32 Then his master summoned him and said to him, ‘You wicked servant! I forgave you all that debt because you pleaded with me. 33 And should not you have had mercy on your fellow servant, as I had mercy on you?’ 34 And in anger his master delivered him to the jailers, until he should pay all his debt. 35 So also my heavenly Father will do to every one of you, if you do not forgive your brother from your heart.”

-Really, we make the commitment to forgive out of a desire to please God

-Perhaps you say well I just can’t forget, well I would say it starts with prayer and obedience. We know we must forgive because we have been forgiven. We pray Lord, help me to forgive as you forgave me. We then choose to forgive that persons and in time God will bring that contentment

Alistair Begg mentioned David Livingstone, who was the great missionary explorer from Blantyre in Scotland, along with his family, suffered a tremendous amount through malicious gossip and idle talk. When he went into the heart of Africa, he left his wife behind in Britain for months on end. And people began to say that the reason he’d left his wife behind and traveled without her was because there were problems in his marriage, and they made up all kinds of ridiculous and scandalous statements, none of which had any basis at all. And twenty years after all of that was in the past, Livingstone in one of his biographies recalls how it still rose up and pained him. And writing to a friend, this is what he said: “I often think I have forgiven, as I hope to be forgiven; but the remembrance of the slander often comes boiling up, although I hate to think of it. You must remember me in your [prayer] that more of the spirit of Christ may be imparted to me.”

-Now a couple of thoughts to consider in our prayer of forgiveness:

-We all have sinned against God and are unable to pay for out debt, only the sacrificial death of Christ could atone for our sins and bring about forgiveness

-Because we are forgiven then we must forgive others who have wronged us, this is an evidence that we have experienced the forgiveness of Christ that we are able to forgive others

-when there is public offenses towards others than we are to seek reconciliation, this does not include heart sins towards another person, thoughts you have had that is something you are to bring before God, but open slander that you have made about someone, or something you have done directly to them - Matthew 18 is a guide towards reconciliation